NMY Graduates Love Thread, Part Two - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 1984 Old 07-27-2007, 03:37 PM
 
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Thank you so much - I'm taking notes...lots and lots of them! Have you, by chance, read Ayun Halliday's The Big Rumpus: A Mother's Tale from the Trenches? I'm thinking about ordering it - I've always loved the east village inky.

Currently I'm reading Fresh Milk - The Secret Life of Breasts by Fiona Giles and I'm loving it. I just finished the chapter about traumatic bf'ing experiences and am a bit shaken but the book is so entertaining and honest and I'm having trouble putting it down. I highly recommend. It's a very easy read too!
taking notes...
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#62 of 1984 Old 07-27-2007, 03:39 PM
 
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btw, I think I remember reading somewhere that your immune system is worse during pregnancy. Have any of you heard that before? I'm not usually sick this long...Tuesday thru today. Blech.
i've read this lots of times. the opposite was true for me.
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#63 of 1984 Old 07-27-2007, 03:41 PM
 
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Also, I was wondering if any of you pregnant mamas or grads experienced round ligament pain in the first trimester? I had some sharp pains last night that seem to fit that description, but everything I've read online this morning says they don't start til the second tri.
oh yeah. i was troubled too because the books have it starting later. but others on my ddc reported it and that calmed me. mine was sharp (i fell on the floor from the pain) and short-lived (under 2 minutes). later on they became much duller and longer-lasting.
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#64 of 1984 Old 07-27-2007, 04:16 PM
 
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Such a gorgeous family! I love Maev's little dress too.

Mama to my sweet Sophia, born at home on 4/6/11.
 
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#65 of 1984 Old 07-27-2007, 06:51 PM
 
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Yup, just as I thought. Another cute baby. Maela, Maev is beautiful.
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Such a gorgeous family! I love Maev's little dress too.
Thank you!! I think she's pretty cute too!

Wife to J. Mama to DD(3yo) & DS(1yo)
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#66 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 05:28 AM
 
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YEA!!! Congratulations Jodi!! Another Girl! Welcome Rosalie!
Hey there Rosalie! Welcome, welcome, welcome.
Congrats Jodi and Daddy! What a cutie pie!


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Jodi, congratulations on making the most gorgeous baby of the whole group (sorry everybody else but just look at her, you can't deny it). I hope mine comes out looking half that beautiful!!

I'm not "upset" or anything, but I pretty amazed to read that...



Maeve is beautiful! All that lovely hair. And you are look so cute and happy together.
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#67 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 09:24 AM
 
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Maev is adorable!

Thanks everyone for the round ligament pain and immune system info! Someone in my DDC with my same EDD starting getting the RL pain at about the same time as me, so that helps me feel better too.

Otoh, I'm still sick!!! : But my voice sounds less like a man this morning, so I'm hoping that's a good sign of things to come.

So DH and I had a good, but painful, discussion last night. We still haven't DTD since we conceived (7.5 weeks ago) because by the time I wasn't freaked out about the thought of it so soon after conceiving, I was feeling nauseous all the time. And this week, the nausea has subsided a bit but then I got hit with this cold from hell or whatever it is, so no go again.

So we're feeling disconnected from each other and snipping at each other a lot. I'm relying on him a lot to help with food because if I let myself get too hungry, my brain seems to stop working and I can't think of what to eat, and then I get so uncomfortable I get whiney about it. So he'll patiently say "what about xxx? what about yyy? what about zzz?" until he stumbles on something that sounds good to me.

He said he understands that I'm not doing this on purpose, but that he feels frustrated with it. Like he's giving and giving and not getting the same in return. I asked him what he wants from me that he's not getting, but he didn't really have an answer. Knowing how important intimacy is to him, I think I read enough between the lines to understand that he's upset he's not getting any intimacy in return. Which is totally true.

And he also said he's scared about how we're going to be parents when we still argue about stuff like this.

Anyway, we didn't really "fix" any issues last night, but it was good to talk about them.

For you pregnant NMYs and grads: Did you come up with any good counterbalances to the increased demands on your partners during pregnancy?

Expecting #2 in May 2013!

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#68 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 09:46 AM
 
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Maela, You make such a cute family! Maev is beautiful!

In the second pic, does she happen to be laying in one of these?

I saw one in the store recently, and I was wondering about them. If they are useful, practical, etc. :

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you poas, right? that's enough. my mom had the same reaction as your dh -- she wouldn't believe it until there was a blood test (which there never was -- we got a heartbeat instead! : ). in the old days that was the only way.
I took my last HPT yesterday – it came up thick and dark in about 30 seconds. So now DH is ready to tell our families. Not sure if I’m ready for that, but I was excited about the prospect of it.

My mom is actually in the hospital today (heart condition, I think it’s stress related), so I’m kind of thinking I want to tell her right away. Very nervous about that though. Maybe it would be more stress for her (?). She can’t keep a secret at all either.

Well, my acupuncturist was a little surprised at how calm I was – most of his fertility clients have already taken 10 tests and had an u/s sound by now. I think maybe all those other months of worrying were enough for me.

And I told my chiropractor yesterday (I go to a husband/wife team – had the female doc this time). She was very excited for me, and as it turns out, she knows the midwives I plan to see! She uses them for well woman care and knows several women who haved birthed with them! Yay, I feel very good about that now.

Kelly, thanks for sharing your experience at the BC. I like having an idea of what to expect.

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I'm relying on him a lot to help with food because if I let myself get too hungry, my brain seems to stop working and I can't think of what to eat, and then I get so uncomfortable I get whiney about it.
Low blood sugar: I guess I was fortunate in that I seem to have had this for a while now, so I’ve learned to recognize it and deal with it (most of the time). I think I’ve felt it get worse this week, where I need to eat every two hours (instead of three) and I can’t finish a big meal, so I need to break it up. It helps to have a standby snack that you can prepare quickly without thinking about it – for me right now it’s whole grain toast with peanut butter. I actually just had one, since I’m waiting for DH to wake up and make breakfast.

We haven’t dtd since we conceived either. I know he is concerned about ‘never doing it again’, but I am looking fwd to what I keep hearing is so great in the 2nd tri. But in the mean time, we’re both a little freaked out about dtd right now.

Mama to J (Apr 01 '08) and N (Feb 13 '10)
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#69 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 11:06 AM
 
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Kelly, Your post sounds exactly like interactions between my DH and me during my 1st tri. Peterson's Easier Childbirth talks about this -- the increased dependency weirded out DH because it wasn't at all like the woman he thought he'd married, and it weirded me out because frankly I didn't like being like that, I just had no choice because I felt so awful. I wish I had taken him seriously earlier in the game about his feelings of lack of reciprocity. They built up to the point that he resented taking care of me, which I sensed, and of course that made everything much worse. Here is what I wish I would have done:

(1) give him a break from me. encourage him go out with his friends without me. we eventually did this and it helped. the barrier for me was that i couldn't take a break from it -- i felt unbelievably bad 24/7, and i didn't want to let him exercise his male privilege of just walking away from it. however, he couldn't be there for me all the time without being resentful, and i sensed the resentment (making me feel bad) and he felt guilty about being resentful and not being the good partner, and his guilt quickly turned to anger at me.

(2) ask for support from girlfriends. mine didn't volunteer; i needed to ask. even then, only a few came through for me during the first tri, but those few were invaluable. i do think our social structures have broken down compared to 30-40 years ago, when friends and neighbors would automatically stop by and help with a lot of practical stuff. now my women friends are all busy with careers and unbelieving that i would need help because the media portrays pregnant women as glowing superwomen. so i had to spell it out for them.

(3) get family to visit and take care of you and to do some of the stuff that is disproportionately falling on your dh right now, like cooking and cleaning. i BEGGED my mom for help but she refused to come, so i know this is easier said than done. but i do think that 1st tri stuff is too much for most couples and that is where the extended family has historically stepped in to support new families.

(4) watch your words. i swear i thanked dh for his help most of the time, but sometimes i just sort of made demands -- i felt so desperate for help IMMEDIATELY! if i criticized him ever, those would be the words he would focus on, forgetting all of my thanks.

(5) let him know you value his feelings. frankly it was hard for me to get/validate them because i had so much of my own to cope with. but he really needed to hear that i heard him and that it would change when i was able to. in our case, his sense that all of the care was unilateral was not really about sex (at least i don't think so), because it got a lot better even though our sex life hasn't. sorry, tmi.

so your post really struck a chord with me. i read it aloud to dh (i hope you don't mind, i wanted to see if he had anything helpful to say from his perspective) and i started crying really hard. his advice was, "this too shall pass." (?!?!) i have to say, i found that very unhelpful to hear at the time.
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#70 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 12:52 PM
 
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Okay, hopefully this works.

Maev

More Maev

With Daddy

Our Family (excluding the kitties )
WOW. Baby girl is gorgeous, and DH is.....um, attractive as well. You look fabulous mama! I love how women look after they give birth :
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#71 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 02:45 PM
 
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just wanted to hop in here. We're (teo and i) are visiting family for a few days so I'm using my Dad's dial-up. My cousin is getting married this afternoon and my brother, sil and dn are in town from ks. It has been really nice getting so see my brother and SIL and meet my nephew. Lots of fun.

I don't really have a lot of input on the discussion/topic that is going on right now. I was one of those pregnant glowing super-woman the media protrays. Granted, anytime someone mentioned food, I got hungry, but other then that...

Maela- Your family is beautiful!
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#72 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 04:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Dropping in to update about our mw appt. We heard the heartbeat - 120bpm. All is looking quite well and our mw jokingly chided us for being "boring" but it was a good appt

Though I certainly wasn't super-woman during my early pregnancy, DH and I didn't struggle much with him helping me out more and doing more for me. The not DTD issue was a bit stickier (we only have 3-4 times since conception and the whole "it gets better in the second trimester" thing is a total myth as far as I'm concerned) but we aren't really struggling with it as long as we do something and I don't let him get to feeling completely ignored and unwanted sexually.

Mama to DS1 (12/07), DS2 (4/11), and DD (6/22/14)
Finally diagnosed with APS after 3 s (11/09, 3/10, 7/13)
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#73 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 04:32 PM
 
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Maela, You make such a cute family! Maev is beautiful!

In the second pic, does she happen to be laying in one of these?

I saw one in the store recently, and I was wondering about them. If they are useful, practical, etc. :
Thank you! And, yes, that is what she is laying in. I bought it for the bed to put between Dh and me, but we've only used it a couple times. She goes to sleep more easily at night when she is touching one of us, and she can't do that in the snugglenest. Also, when I'm lying down next to her, I can't see her over the edge of it. It's not that big of a deal, I guess, but I still feel the need to look at her every couple of minutes before I fall asleep to make sure she's still breathing. I'm thinking that we'll mostly use it when and I'm not holding her. Not sure though. I'll keep you updated on whether it actually gets used enough.

Sex during pg: Although I was constantly sick to my stomach during the first tri, I was also really, um...horny. I thought, "this is great! I can't wait until I'm not feeling sick anymore." The 2nd tri came, and I stopped feeling so sick a few weeks later. But then we had the whole Trisomy 18 scare and a bunch of other little things happened that made us not feel like DTD. And then my drive went away and it became painful (still not sure why - tender cervix?). So I'm still kind of : that I never got my 2nd tri great sex life that everyone always talks about. Just had to complain...

Wife to J. Mama to DD(3yo) & DS(1yo)
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#74 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 04:37 PM
 
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Dropping in to update about our mw appt. We heard the heartbeat - 120bpm. All is looking quite well and our mw jokingly chided us for being "boring" but it was a good appt
Yay!! :

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Though I certainly wasn't super-woman during my early pregnancy, DH and I didn't struggle much with him helping me out more and doing more for me. The not DTD issue was a bit stickier (we only have 3-4 times since conception and the whole "it gets better in the second trimester" thing is a total myth as far as I'm concerned) but we aren't really struggling with it as long as we do something and I don't let him get to feeling completely ignored and unwanted sexually.
bolding mine
:
Same here.
That's what I just wrote!

Wife to J. Mama to DD(3yo) & DS(1yo)
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#75 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 04:59 PM
 
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Dropping in to update about our mw appt. We heard the heartbeat - 120bpm. All is looking quite well and our mw jokingly chided us for being "boring" but it was a good appt
...
Congrats Steph on the "boring" appointment. I see nothing wrong with that. Yay!!!! on hearing the heartbeat and being half (er, half-ish) way there.

Mama to my sweet Sophia, born at home on 4/6/11.
 
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#76 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 06:49 PM
 
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Sihaya, congrats on hearing the heartbeat! How exciting!

Christina, I hope your mom gets better soon. Whatever you decide on telling her, I'm sure it will work out fine in the end.

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Kelly, Your post sounds exactly like interactions between my DH and me during my 1st tri.
PiePie, thank you thank you thank you for your post and all the great ideas on coping with this stage. I told DH that I posted about our talk last night. At first, he was upset that you all would think badly of him, but when I told him that he's not alone in feeling like he's feeling, I think it really helped. We're doing much better today, and I feel like we're connecting again.

Expecting #2 in May 2013!

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#77 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 08:30 PM
 
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I just heard about a really cool book called Parenting for Peace and Justice - MMM, I thought it might right up your alley too. I'll report back after I've received it from Paperback swap and have had a chance to read it. DH and my discussions on schooling have taken an interesting turn since I read this book. I'm fly-by posting during a surprise nap, I'll try to go talk more about it soon.

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the whole "it gets better in the second trimester" thing is a total myth as far as I'm concerned)
Ummmmm......not a myth. And the third trimester was......um, better yet. Steph, that clinches it, I think you're having a girl. Although Maela is throwing my theory for a loop, having a girl.

Congratulations on hearing the heartbeat!!!!!!!
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#78 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 09:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Steph, that clinches it, I think you're having a girl. Although Maela is throwing my theory for a loop, having a girl.
You crack me up. Our mw said today that, going by the heartbeat, she thinks it's a boy. And of course I've been sure it's a boy from the very start. So I might just throw a wrench in your theory, too

Mama to DS1 (12/07), DS2 (4/11), and DD (6/22/14)
Finally diagnosed with APS after 3 s (11/09, 3/10, 7/13)
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#79 of 1984 Old 07-28-2007, 10:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I just heard about a really cool book called Parenting for Peace and Justice - MMM, I thought it might right up your alley too. I'll report back after I've received it from Paperback swap and have had a chance to read it. DH and my discussions on schooling have taken an interesting turn since I read this book. I'm fly-by posting during a surprise nap, I'll try to go talk more about it soon.
I just looked these up and was able to find the first one on paperbackswap, but can't find the second one. Is there any way I could borrow it from you? They both sound very intriguing.

Mama to DS1 (12/07), DS2 (4/11), and DD (6/22/14)
Finally diagnosed with APS after 3 s (11/09, 3/10, 7/13)
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#80 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 09:54 AM
 
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I just looked these up and was able to find the first one on paperbackswap, but can't find the second one. Is there any way I could borrow it from you? They both sound very intriguing.
Sure, I'm almost finished with it. It's uneven, but some parts are really great.
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#81 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 10:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Sure, I'm almost finished with it. It's uneven, but some parts are really great.
Awesome, thank you!

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Finally diagnosed with APS after 3 s (11/09, 3/10, 7/13)
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#82 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 11:22 AM
 
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Christina!!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!!!


and Rosalie! Congratulations Jodi!!!

sorry i've missed so much...it's been kinda busy around here.

now i have to go back and look for all the photos and stories...

Busy mama of
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#83 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 02:01 PM
 
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Dropping in to update about our mw appt. We heard the heartbeat - 120bpm. All is looking quite well and our mw jokingly chided us for being "boring" but it was a good appt

Though I certainly wasn't super-woman during my early pregnancy, DH and I didn't struggle much with him helping me out more and doing more for me. The not DTD issue was a bit stickier (we only have 3-4 times since conception and the whole "it gets better in the second trimester" thing is a total myth as far as I'm concerned) but we aren't really struggling with it as long as we do something and I don't let him get to feeling completely ignored and unwanted sexually.
WOOHOOOO!!!! Congrats on hearing the HB!!!

(and BTW - I think that It's a myth too.... )

And for the record - I'm guessing boy as well

-Jodi
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#84 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 02:03 PM
 
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I apologize in advance for this being so long!

Okay, now that she's 6 days old - I finally feel like I have time to write this birth story!

Well on Friday I started feeling kinda wet - and I was worried my water was getting a slow leak - but I finally came to the conclusion that it was just increased CM.... and it continued through till labor started. By Saturday I had began to spot pink, and so I knew something was happening, but figured it would still be quite a while since I still felt totally normal and no contractions, etc.... This continued on till Sunday. Then Sunday DH and I decided to run some errands because my sister was coming to stay with us for a week or two and we wanted to go get some groceries so she could help me cook some casseroles while we waited for baby to arrive. I truely believed I'd go overdue (but she was born at exactly 39 weeks).

Sunday mornign I was still spotting, DH and I started making the shopping list and he made a pot of coffee. But the coffee pot decided to not work anymore - and so we also wrote on our list to go to the kitchen/bath shop to get another because we were having a homebirth and figured the MW's might want some coffee...... I called the MW's just to let them know I'd been spotting for a couple days (because just Tuesday when i had seen them, I had no signs of labor at all) but neither of them answered and I decided it wasn't a big deal and I didn't leave a message.
So we went to the store - they didn't have the kind of cofee pot we wanted, and then we went to the grocery store. We got all our groceries and while we were in the check-out line, I felt a little gush of fluid - not much really - so I assumed it was just more CM.... then I got another gush - bigger this time and I began to worry that it was my water that had broken and I knew by how it felt that my pantiliner was now full. But it still wasn't so much fluid that it was dripping or anything and I wasn't totally convinced that it was my water. (this was 3:30pm on Sunday).... So we checked out our groceries - and walked to the parking lot. Dh loaded the groceries in the trunk and I went to sit down in the car, this time another small gush - so I was pretty sure it was my water.... I was wearing a dress and a pair of shorts underneath and by now i could tell some of my shorts were damp. So before we left the parking lot - i called my MW's - but niether of them answered their phones - and I didn't leave messages yet, wanted to see if things would pick up....

So we drove the 30 minutes home - without a coffee pot and DH started noticing I was rubbing my tummy - I told him it was feeling crampy off and on and that I think my water broke a little bit.... so he timed me everytime I held my tummy. I was having contractions every 9-12 minutes and they were lasting about 40 seconds.

So we got home and i just timed my contractions every once and a while. I called my MW back and she answered - I told her that I think my water had broken and the contractions were still spoardic. She told me to call back when they got into a good pattern and were 5 minutes apart. Plus - I never got the GBS test run because I decided I'd want antibiotics regardless at 18-24 hours if my water broke early - positive or not..... which meant I had a time-limit. So the contractions got to about 8 minutes apart and lasting 45-60 seconds. They were annoying - but not painful.

At 8pm, my MW called me back to check on me. She was kinda disappointed to learn that my contractions weren't getting stronger, and sent me out to get some castor oil (because at this point I had to get baby out by 10am Monday - or else my homebirth would have to transfer to hospital...... So DH and I went back out and I sent him in to get the oil, and some rootbeer to make a float with to drink the oil - but the pharmacy didn't have any rootbeer, either did the gas station - so we ended up going back to the grocery store. By now my contractions were 7-8 minutes, but still not strong.

I got home, made myself a rootbeer/castor oil float and just as I finished it, my MW's called back - still not much going on, so they told me to call them in the middle of the night or whenever I needed them to come over for the birth. They also wanted me to try some nipple stimulation to get things going stronger - I tried it, but it didn't help - so I used my electric pump for about 45 minutes - that did nothing either, so around 10pm I went to bed. I slept through my contractions till around 11:45 when I was woken up by cramping and a stronger contraction that lasted almost a minute. I decided it was just gas pain from the castor oil and drifted off back to sleep - but was woken back up with another about 7 minutes later. So I laid there for a third one and finally decided to get out of bed to help things along.

I let DH sleep. At around 2am my contractions started coming every 4 minutes - lasting about 45 seconds - not quite strong enough to need the MW's, but I thought I should call them since they live about an hour from my house... The MW told me to call back when they were painful enough to breathe through them. So I went back to laboring on my ball in the living room and pacing around the house trying to keep the contractions going. DH woke up around 3:30 and checked on me. The MW's called back around 4 and said they were coming over even though they thought it would still be a while. By now I started having several loose stools, which meant the castor oil was working. Just about 4:30 I got sick and threw up - and It made my contractions start coming a bit stronger, but not much. The MW's arrived at 5am. and checked me. I was 3cm and 0 station, and she easily stretched me to 4cm.

The MW's drank tea - and coffee DH made by tea-bag method by tying a coffee filter shut. DH and I walked for a while, I tried more nipple stim in the shower, sat on the birth ball, etc. but nothing seemed to make the contractions much stronger. I did finally get to the point where I had to breathe through them - but still not too bad. All the pain was in my tummy and it felt good to lean forward on DH.

By 9am,. the MW's wanted to go on a walk with us down our 1/4 mile long dirt road. I only had an hour left to get the baby born before being transfered to the hospital. At the end of our walk we talked about what to do - they agreed to let me stay home till 11 if I wanted, just to see, but that it may not be enough time - depending on how my cervix was doing - and the fact that my contractions were still only 4-5 minutes apart. So I decided that they could check me now and if I was not close - I'd go to the hospital to get antibiotics. We thought that if a good doc was on call - that they may just give the antibioitics and I could come back home - but the OB on-call was not willing to do that. So they checked me at 10, and I was 5cm and kinda stretchy, so they figured I would probably be a 6 soon - but that an 11:00 baby didn't look very likely. So we packed up some stuff and the MW drove us to the hospital.

I didn't have a single contraction during the entire 30 minute drive. One of my MW's is actually also a labor and delivery nurse at my hospital - and was due to work her shift that night from 3-11...... so I was lucky that she got to be my "nurse" as well.

Once I got to the hospital, I still had no contractions - and so the MW's went to the cafeteria to get some lunch while I got my antibiotics and was hooked to the monitor for 20 minutes. I took a little cat-nap and finally around 2 my contractions started back up - much stronger now.

The MW'S came back and noticed right away something was different. So they sat with me and DH while I labored. It was so nice having them all there. At 3 one of my MW's (Debbi) left to get her nurse clothes on and sign-in to work. She came back as my nurse and my other MW was still there (Marla) - sorta being my doula (since niether have delievery privleges at the hospital due to policy problems in VA)....

Ever since my contractions started back up at the hospital - It hurt in my tailbone and back a LOT.... and so DH was with me- letting me lean on him, and my MW Marla was putting pressure on my tailbone. It helped - but not much.

At 4pm (24 hour after my water broke) the OB came in. She was not my doctor - but I'd met her before and she was really good (she delivered 2 of my doula clients babies). She checked me and said I was at 7cm.

When she left - I labored by leaning on the birthball that was on the bed and Debbi filled the tub. I got in the tub and tried all sorts of positions to ge comfortable - but the tail-bone labor was too intense, nothing was making it feel better - not even the pressure Marla was doing was helping at all anymore. I was on my hands and knees in the tub for about an hour and then decided to sit - that kinda helped - but by then my contractions were coming with only about 30 seconds between them. They were very intense - and I thought for sure my tailbone was going to break off.....

Debbi came back in and checked me at 5. I was 9cm - almost 10. and I started feeling pushy....So she told me not to push if I could help it.... but by the 3rd contraction I couldn't help it....so the MW checked again and said I was fully dilated - but had a lip of cervix and so she held it back on my next contraction and it went away.

I had about 6 more contractions while in the tub and Marla and DH were rubbing my back and helping me stay focused. The pushing got so strong that I couldn't do anything but push - and it made me push REALLY long (like 30 second long pushes). It was so intense I was worried I wouldn't be able to keep it up. Plus my tailbone was SOOO painful by now! Debbi said that she paged the OB (who had to catch the baby even though I would rather have had Marla or Debbie do it).... and I planned to get out of the tub and be on my hands and knees for pushing, or maybe squatting.... because I knew from research/doula-ing that being on your back/tailbone makes you more likely to tear......

But when I got out of the tub- the only way I could be with those strong pushing contractions was sitting on my tailbone. any other position was terrible. I think it was the counterpressure that made sitting tolerable. The OB came in and watched me push through one contraction - she said I was a great pusher and couldn't believe that I was pushing that hard for 40 seconds or more without taking a break. She kept trying to tell me to do 3-4 pushes per contraction - but I could only ever get 1 or 2 pushes in because they were just SOOOOOOO long and SOOOOO strong that I couldn't have stopped them if I tried.

My sister had been driving all day to VA from GA to be there for us - and she arrived at 5:50pm - and Rosalie was born at 6:04.

I ended up having a 2nd degree tear partially because of my position, and partially because I couldn't ease up on my pushing at all when she was crowning and coming too fast and hard because of how I was pushing - but I couldn't stop when they told me to slow down my pushing.....

Rosalie's apgars were 9 and 9 and she took several tries to start nursing, but now she is really good at it. I think everything went really well! I was so happy to have my 2 MW's, DH and my sister there. And though I was SOOO hoping for a HB etc., I know that I did the best thing because I would have been a worry-wart these first few days if I would not have gotten the antibiotics since my water was broken for so long. I'm really happy about how everything turned out

If you read all this - you deserve a medal! That was long!!!!!

-Jodi :giveflower:
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#85 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 04:00 PM
 
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Hi all.. I'm back at home for a few days before we (teo and i) take off for Alameda/SF for a week.
We got to see family, which was great! however, the day we are leaving we find out the BIG family dinner (immediate family) was the next day. Something NO ONE told us. If I had known, we would have made different plans. That sucked!

I also got to hear the wonderful comments from family as well.
1. I look anorexic and should eat more, (from my mom), Apparently, not eating dairy, soy, and peanuts is depriving me and it is okay if the baby 'spits-up'.
2. 'if you ever put him down' (from my sister w/o kids) I was telling her Teo is on the verge of crawling and how it is just a matter of time.
3. Apparently I'm very controlling (told to my DH from my sisters) Just you wait til you have kid #2. They told him just you wait until after you get married, until after you have kid #1 etc... He's still waiting. He told them that too.
4. I don't let my natural inner mommy out because i'm going by what all these books say. (also from sister w/o kids to my DH) it might surprise her to know that i've never read a parenting book. Birth, labour, and pg, yes, parenting No.
5. When are you going to start feeding him REAL food? (from my sister w/ kids) breastmilk is REAL.

All in all, not bad for 3 days, right?

My brother and sil are doing well. They're aiming for kid #2 soon. I'm pretty sure they are trying now, but it might not be going as easy as the first. I hope to hear good news from them soon.

I love my family, I really do. I miss them and wish I could see everyone more often. Even with the comments (only a few and not harped on)

I'll probably have some REALLY good ones for you from my SF trip. I remember reading in my Dad's babybook he had meat at 3 weeks. wow! The things we know now!
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#86 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 06:58 PM
 
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Jodi, what a great story. I'm so glad you're happy with how everything turned out. Give your babe a kiss for me!

Katt, lol at the family comments. I can't wait to hear about SF (not that I'm wishing ignorant comments from family on you )

Mommy to DS1 July '09 and DS2 Oct '12
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#87 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 09:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Rico'sAlice View Post

I'm not "upset" or anything, but I pretty amazed to read that...
I was trying to be cute. I hope it wasn't inappropiate. I don't always think before I type. I was just trying to say that she's cute enough to be a baby model without talking about baby models because I think it's kind of an exploitative bussiness (if exploitative is even a word). And I think I was subconciously echoing my inner worry of not liking my baby. DH assures me I'll be on such a hormonal high I'll think Baby is gorgeous no matter what but that doesn't really help...it just makes me think of that Seinfeld episode where the parents didn't notice how ugly the baby was.

And don't worry...no one here has an ugly baby (though a few of my friends have...luckily we were overseas so we never had to deal with awkwardness about it and the babies all grew to be cuties by the time we got home...phew)!!


Quote:
Did you come up with any good counterbalances to the increased demands on your partners during pregnancy?
Not really. I felt horrible about it but was so cranky and sick and depressed that I didn't really let Mike know that he was at all appreciated until one day the poor guy broke down crying when I snapped at him for trying to do something without asking for help when he had no clue what he was doing. Now I try to make a point of praising his efforts and letting him know I really do appreciate him doing so much. It's been tough for him since he's taken over the household duties, taken on a fulltime job, watched me fall apart emotionally (I'm a lot better now but those first few months were kinda scary), and pretty much given up his sex life. It amazes me that he's put up with so much crap from me and I honestly hope I can make it up to him someday.

Sorry, that's not any advise at all, I'm rambling. Just try to do better than me and not let things get so overwhelming for your mate.

And Jodi! Thank you for the birth story. I love reading them to prep for Baby's arrival!

Traveling mama to DS (2) my nature boy :
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#88 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 09:15 PM
 
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What's up with my signature...there's no space there?? I just went to edit twice and it still insists there's a space.:

Traveling mama to DS (2) my nature boy :
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#89 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 09:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Arelyn, after so many characters in a row, it just inserts a space for you. To fix it, you'll need to put a space before the smilie text. Let me know if you still need help!

Mama to DS1 (12/07), DS2 (4/11), and DD (6/22/14)
Finally diagnosed with APS after 3 s (11/09, 3/10, 7/13)
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#90 of 1984 Old 07-29-2007, 11:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by katt View Post
I was telling her Teo is on the verge of crawling and how it is just a matter of time.
ALREADY?!!

katt, i love your sense of humor over the comments from family. if only i could say the same were true on my end. to be honest, i find some avoidance kicking in -- don't want to deal with world war iii over co-sleeping...
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