I wrote out my birth story. - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 03-06-2009, 06:05 PM - Thread Starter
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I'm not ready to post it yet.. it's really long. I literally just spent four hours getting it all down on (virtual) paper. I'm still crying. I feel good though. I think this was a big step for me in processing the birth. It really happened, I had real feelings about it every step of the way, and now they're out there in black and white.

I avoided saying birth for a while, it was just a surgery to me, but someone on one of the other threads in this forum made me change my mind. DH and I have no desire to have any more kids, so this is it, I can't "make up for it" by trying for a VBAC. My daughter still came into this world even though she didn't come through my vagina; this was the only birth I could give her, so goshdarnit, I'm calling it a birth!
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#2 of 4 Old 03-06-2009, 10:42 PM
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Yes ma'am, it IS a birth! I'm glad you allow yourself that.

It's good to hear writing it out was healing for you. Crying and acknowledging all your emotions is healing.

Me + Dh = Dd1(9.5 yrs) + Dd2(7 yrs) and Ds(4.5 yrs)
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#3 of 4 Old 03-12-2009, 02:48 AM
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Congratulations on getting your story written. I can't imagine how hard that was. You're brave for even revisiting it. I hope it was empowering and healing to you.

I can relate to a lot of what you said. I also had a daughter by cesarean and I'm still struggling with calling it a birth. I don't know how to get to that point. I guess I have a long way to go.

DD1 6 1/2 DD2 9/20/14 (18 weeks)
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#4 of 4 Old 03-12-2009, 05:38 PM
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Wow, s to you mama! I know how you feel - I still can't call what happened to us a birth. I hope that eventually I will be at peace with our experience too. I haven't even managed to get up the courage to write out the whole story yet (14 months later) though I've posted bits and pieces of it here over the months. There is something kind of liberating about writing it down in black and white - like you're acknowledging the pain instead of trying to deny it.

Lisa - mama to Eleanor Rose 01/08 and Saoirse Lily 09/10
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