I gave birth 10 weeks ago to a gorgeous little girl. My ob gyn insisted I had to be induced because I had started to lose amnio fluid a few days before my due date, and my cervix had barely thinned out by that point.
I was in labor for 18 hours and when it came time to push, everything seemed to be going just fine. My doctor didn't tell me the baby was in distress or that my body was, for whatever reason, incapable of handling the birthing process naturally.
I was so caught up in the chaos of contractions and pushing that I barely noticed when he took a scissor and began snipping down there. As a result of the episiotomy, I needed 12 stitches.
I'm only now beginning to read up on episiotomies and whether it was even necessary for my doc to perform this procedure. My husband and I have tried to have sex several times and the pain is unbearable. It actually feels like something is blocking his penis from entering me.
Went back to the Dr to get checked out. It turns out I have pretty bad scar tissue, which could be to blame for the painful intercourse.
Is this normal? Would it have been better to tear naturally?
Naturally tearing would have been better. Im sorry the doctor did that to you. I tore a bit but only had a few stitches to fix it. The geography down there did change some but after a few months, the swelling went down and it was okay again. Im just built a little differently down there so had to adjust..how do I say it..the vector for entry?
Sadly many doctors are taught to do those automatically and don't even think to ask you. I was lucky in that things timed out well enough that he never had a chance to do it to me.
You may want to find out if you need to have some clean up of the scar tissue done if its truly impeding things but may have to wait a bit more to determine that.
Im sorry my answer isn't the greatest.
I am sorry your doc did that to you. This also happened to me with my first - many years ago before ACOG came out with its notice that most episiotomies are unnecessary.
DTD was very painful for me afterward as well. The sensation you are describing, like something was blocking the opening is spot on. That is exactly how it felt for me. That pain, coupled with sleep deprivation and hormone-related dryness made DTD a very rare thing for quite a number of months. The pain lasted about a year, decreasing as time went on, and then was gone.
I guess the good news is that after I had DS a couple of years later (same OB, but no episiotomy), I had absolutely no pain during intercourse.
My midwife almost ended up giving me an episiotomy without really asking me but it was a bit of an emergency, it was more like, 'sorry, but you need this right now'. But then I ended up tearing instead, so I didn't end up needing one. It's been 8 months and things are still a bit uncomfy for me. At 4 months it was still quite painful (I still couldn't wipe, I had to use that squirt bottle that they give you) and when I went back to the midwife it turned out that things weren't healing well because I had an bit of an infection. I went on antibiotics and that helped a lot but it's not back to normal. I also have a little scar tissue that has gradually sort of softened up and gotten less sensitive.
That being said, I'm really sorry that your Dr gave you an episiotomy without asking. If it was needed, which it sounds like it wasn't, he should have given you an idea of what was going on. Many Drs still do them routinely, but they are rarely necessary, and a good Dr. should realize that. I think I would have been very upset if that had happened to me. If I was in your situation I would probably want to talk to a midwife or a Dr. familiar with natural birth practices and have them look at your scaring, I wouldn't want to go back to the Dr who did the episiotomy. It could help to process what happened if you asked the Dr to go over WHY he did the episiotomy, chances are he won't have a good reason and if so you could write a letter to the hospital review board about what happened--it might make you feel better and maybe could help out some women in the future.