Need a Pep-talk, fearful of this birth! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 06-25-2013, 12:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am currently due any day and I am suffering from severe anxiety!! We have a great OB (I'm hoping to find a mid-wife for our next one) but she's part of a group and I cannot guarantee we will get her when the "time comes". My previous birth was HORRID!! I am so fearful of a repeat that I just can't seem to wrap my mind around this one. I've been practicing the Bradley relaxation methods, but I keep going back to thoughts of my previous labor/delivery where my wishes were NOT followed or even listened to. We had the on-call OB who was from another group and I was coerced into having an epidural - they were convinced that I wouldn't be able to deliver our baby and I would need a c-section, so I was given a "mandatory" epidural (I only found out afterwords that I could have refused, but that wasn't made known to me...we were told our baby was at risk and the OR was being prepped for a c-section). I got so sick off the epidural and my body has never felt the same...I've been eating a whole foods, natural diet since then, and I feel physically great, but I could really use a pep-talk. I KNOW our bodies are fully capable of handling birthing on their own (of course there are the rare exceptions) so any advice/reassurance to help me focus on this one and NOT feel so much anxiety/trepidation??

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#2 of 4 Old 06-25-2013, 03:18 PM
 
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Hopefully you've had a chance to share your experience and concerns with your current OB, and have had some assurances that either your current OB, or another OB in the group with a similar approach will definitely be available (whether in person or just in contact with the hospital to ensure your wishes are met as much as possible). Sending you positive thoughts and prayers for a much better experience this time!

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#3 of 4 Old 06-25-2013, 04:43 PM
 
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Will you have your partner with with you? Having my husband there to advocate sure helped me as I concentrated on my job of birthing. I cannot imagine being there alone and having to communicate my wishes with staff. Though to be fair they were quite kind and fair.
Secondly a well laid out, but short and concise birth plan, given to the labor and delivery department, pediatrician, and obstetrician, ahead of estimated birth date, helped in our birth. I put quite a bit into preparation with the medical personnel before hand so that we were on the same page.
I am sorry you are stressed. I can certainly relate. It should not be this way. I absolutely remember feeling the same way.
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#4 of 4 Old 06-26-2013, 04:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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  Thank you ladies SO much!!  I did sit down with my (preferred) OB and shared with her my concerns (especially about how I felt "deceived" the last time around and how I have SO much anxiety with this one) and even typed up a short birth plan.  I will have my husband there with me, but unfortunately, he is a non-confrontational kind of guy, so while he advocates for me, it's very passive...I've learned you (sometimes, depending on the doctors/nurses) you have to be more aggressive.  Not to mention he's usually asleep during the first few hours of my labors (hehe...he works 12 hour shifts and it never fails that I go into labor in the middle of the night!!  Poor guy).  No worries, I tease him ALL the time about not being "there" for my labors.  2whistle.gif

  I like the idea of calling the hospital too, thank you for that!  It will be nice to know that I have everything pre-arranged (as best as possible) before the little one makes an arrival.  Thank you again ladies!!  hug2.gif

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