I think my subconscious has been resisting this one. Or maybe it's my aching hip and back? Ha!
I was talking with my midwife friend the other day. I was explaining to her that I go in and out of being at peace with the waiting. Sometimes I am ok with the fact that I am not due for another couple of weeks and that it might be longer than that. And sometimes (like when I hear about another Mom here having her baby or after a restless nights sleep ) I just want her out. I told her I figured the baby would come when I felt like I wanted her out more often than not
And I am just soaking this in. I get anxious to see her and then I remember they are more work out than in
Midwifery Student and Mama to 2 daughters and 3 sons.
I have given birth a variety of ways and I am thankful for what each one has taught me.
On a side note, my prenatal appt before last, my midwife was running really late and I didn't see her until an HOUR after my appt. She kept saying "Thanks for being patient!" I just didn't say anything, because I HADN'T been patient AT ALL!! I had been whining and complaining and grouchy (at least in my head) and I had sent my husband back to work. It had been the first one he'd been to in months and I was really happy that he'd been able to come. And then I had to send him back because it was taking so long.
Mama to DS (6/07) , DD (6/09) , and DD (07/12) ..
My chiropractor just recently had her baby and hearing him cry just made me smile because I thought, yippee, I will have one of those before too long...then I later think, yeah and it will be 24/7!!!
It is really hard to be patient some days, especially when so many people ask you when you are having the baby (I wish I knew!). Scheduled C-sections and inductions are so common that just waiting until the baby and your body are ready to go into labor is a surprise for some people.
What pregnancy does to my head:
What new babies do for my heart:
I just tell myself that she can a. come out whenever as long as I am done with school and have seen my one Phish show--so she can come out any point after June 10. b. she can come out when her room and stuff's ready and when I have all my grades turned in and exams copied and room cleaned out (I teach high school). That also falls around June 10 or so.
She's due June 27, so I think she can honor the June 10 request. haha!
My body hurts but I know this kid won't stay in forever. At some point I will meet him and get to hold him and nurse him...but until that day comes life will go on and I will get through each day!!!
Yes, I'm torn between physically wanting him out, but mentally being a bit freaked out about suddenly having a child! I read something the other day about talking to the baby and telling him it's okay to come out, everything's ready, etc. etc. I started doing that, but I think it just makes me feel better. I'm not sure he's really affected.
I'm not ready for baby. I should be ready. I know what I'm doing with a newborn by now. Physically I have almost everything in place and am just down to the last minute couple of things which I keep putting off. I should be ready, but I don't feel ready. I'm so sick of being sick, so one would think that I would be anxious for it to be done now, but I'm content for Bun to stay inside for a lot longer still.
OT but so jealous you have tickets to Knoxville! I was trying for Asheville since its within 2 hours of me and my EDD is 6.15 but it just wasn't meant to be. Have a great show!
As for being ready for baby, I am 38 weeks tomorrow and this will sound lame but I am just now getting my arms aroudn the idea that I am actually pg. We suffered for years with infertility and finally were successful with IVF with dd. Then didn't prevent for 19 cycles and thought for sure we'd have to do IVF again when bam! we got pg on our own. I still am in shock.
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