feeling discouraged, don't want an induction - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 11:01 AM - Thread Starter
 
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So I am not *that* late yet, I'm 40wks 5 days today, but its odd to have this end date looming over me where I will get induced (next Saturday, Ill be 41wks 6 days)

My doc did a cervical check yesterday and babe is still high; I'm 1cm dilated, even my braxton hicks contractions seem to not happen as much anymore, babe is moving a ton and seems altogether happy as a clam in there. I had an u/s earlier in the week since I thought I was leaking amniotic fluid (turns out its just the *wateriest* discharge ever) and I have a TON of fluid (top of normal) so it makes sense that the babe isn't engaged and is moving a lot happily. Why leave?

I'm also pretty comfortable myself, I don't need to wake up still even to pee in the night; I can still sleep on my back, bend over, bike to work, play frisbee, etc., I just don't *feel* like labor is close. At all.

but I *really* don't want to get induced! I really want no drugs if I can. Plus the doc mentioned that inducing me now would probably fail given where I'm at (not dilated, not engaged, etc) so I worry what I'd be like in only a week - I don't want to end up w/ a c-section! So we are having sex, eating indian food, I am walking, running, taking EPO, etc. Next wednesday I have the option of trying some acupressure if I want.

I know my dates are right on; I know the day I ovulated (I get distinct ovulation pain) plus I have a super consistent 28 day cycle and ovulated on day 15 (so super close to their assumptions w/ LMP) so as much as it seems like I'm really only 8mos here by how I feel I know the baby is term.

I guess I'm looking for a story where someone felt super far away from labor and it all happened super fast when least expecting it
any advice? Can labor just come on super suddenly even when not dilated, engaged, etc? Its the lack of 'dropping' that worries me, it seems like w/ first-time moms that usually happens a week or two out from labor? And hasn't happened yet. But maybe that's a function of all the fluid?

mom to z (June 2009) and m (may 2011)

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#2 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 11:28 AM
 
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My first never dropped. I never even started dilating before the real work began - no bloody show, no mucus plug appearance, never even felt a BH contraction, nothing. Then at 41w1d I just starting having contractions. They very slowly over a long period of time got more and more intense...and that was how it all began. I won't finish the rest of my labor story b/c I think that things could have been very different with a different birthing place/situation/etc. but before I went into labor I was just hanging out, feeling great! Someone posted an article here this week that said the average first time mother goes to 41w2d.

I am 40w3d right now and in a very similar situation to you. I saw my MW today. He checked my cervix and said I was 1 cm dilated, the cervix was still kinda long and hard. The baby is lower and in a good position but he doesn't think I will go into labor this weekend...his prediction was Wednesday. We set an appointment for Thursday to do a bit of monitoring but he won't intervene or anything before 42 or 42 1/2 weeks. He wasn't at all surprised that I hadn't given birth yet since my son came late. I feel great, the baby is moving like crazy, and I am going to try and enjoy this possible last weekend!

So, hang in there! Your babe is going to come really soon but the fact that you aren't having any signs or etc. isn't any indication of when or how soon the baby will come...it really could be anytime now. If it feels fun to eat Indian food (we did that this week), walk (we've been hiking everyday this week), DTD (that too!) than go for it....why not?!
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#3 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 12:12 PM
 
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Hang in there, and really try not to let the threat of induction stress you out. That will only work counter to your efforts to go into labor.

I never dropped with my first. No indication of impending labor at ALL until the morning of. Then I had a little bit of bloody show. Maybe one or two "different" (compared to BH) contractions throughout the day but nothing that made me think labor would happen soon. At my weekly appointment that evening they checked me, I was 1-2cm and baby still very high. Two hours later we were back at the birth center and I was 7cm and in transition!! It did indeed happen VERY quickly with no warning at all.

It could be that way for you too. Hang in there. These last weeks are so stressful without someone talking about induction. Stay positive. Talk to your baby and tell him/her you are ready to meet!! Relax and enjoy these last few days. You will be holding your baby soon!
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#4 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 12:14 PM
 
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I think it's pretty normal for a first time mom to have NO signs whatsoever. That's how it is for most people I talk to.
I actually feel less like I'm going to have a baby now than I did at 38 weeks, but I know that's not true because I'm 41=1 today!
You should read this article that was posted a few days ago: http://www.associatedcontent.com/art...te.html?cat=25

It changed my EDD from the 4th to the 10th! Can't hurt to arm yourself with info so you can stick up to your doc if it comes to that.

I was talking to my midwife yesterday and she told me that out of 10,000 babies she's delivered, she has never delivered one that had any problems from staying in too long. And I'm talking babies that cooked for over 44 weeks!
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#5 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 12:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by sarahwg View Post
My first never dropped. I never even started dilating before the real work began - no bloody show, no mucus plug appearance, never even felt a BH contraction, nothing. Then at 41w1d I just starting having contractions. They very slowly over a long period of time got more and more intense...and that was how it all began. I won't finish the rest of my labor story b/c I think that things could have been very different with a different birthing place/situation/etc. but before I went into labor I was just hanging out, feeling great! Someone posted an article here this week that said the average first time mother goes to 41w2d.

I am 40w3d right now and in a very similar situation to you. I saw my MW today. He checked my cervix and said I was 1 cm dilated, the cervix was still kinda long and hard. The baby is lower and in a good position but he doesn't think I will go into labor this weekend...his prediction was Wednesday. We set an appointment for Thursday to do a bit of monitoring but he won't intervene or anything before 42 or 42 1/2 weeks. He wasn't at all surprised that I hadn't given birth yet since my son came late. I feel great, the baby is moving like crazy, and I am going to try and enjoy this possible last weekend!

So, hang in there! Your babe is going to come really soon but the fact that you aren't having any signs or etc. isn't any indication of when or how soon the baby will come...it really could be anytime now. If it feels fun to eat Indian food (we did that this week), walk (we've been hiking everyday this week), DTD (that too!) than go for it....why not?!
your first's story is encouraging! I keep reading that babies should drop unless you've had a kid already. I wasn't going to worry until after this long weekend (taking monday off, so Ill be 41wks1day then) and figured hopefully I'd be comparable to the average first time labor onset. I think I just am nervous that w/out signs that its coming that Ill end up heading towards the induction date before i know it!

I do think some long walks would be a good idea. And yeah, going to enjoy it still being just me and the mr. this weekend

I'm just a worry-er, so having the induction scheduled already I guess is just weighing on me!

mom to z (June 2009) and m (may 2011)

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#6 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 12:40 PM
 
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Seafox, I"m in much the same boat. Conveniently one of the homebirthers in town is celebrating her daughter's 4th birthday today, and was posting details on facebook. Stuff like "4 years ago today I was sitting in Barnes and Noble crying because, after 6 weeks of contractions, I was convinced I was going to be pregnant forever." Her next kid she had lots of prodromal labor as well and didn't realize she was really in labor until one hour before the baby was born.

At some point it does happen. Or so they tell me.

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#7 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 12:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Seafox, I"m in much the same boat. Conveniently one of the homebirthers in town is celebrating her daughter's 4th birthday today, and was posting details on facebook. Stuff like "4 years ago today I was sitting in Barnes and Noble crying because, after 6 weeks of contractions, I was convinced I was going to be pregnant forever." Her next kid she had lots of prodromal labor as well and didn't realize she was really in labor until one hour before the baby was born.

At some point it does happen. Or so they tell me.
yeah, I guess I was hoping even for some ctx to help me think its coming! Even if it must be annoying

I think I have trouble even telling if I'm having a BH now just because the belly feels so tight all the time. I feel like I had a bunch last night but I'm not sure anymore! And I used to get them biking all the time but now I can't tell or am not getting them.

The baby is definitely moving a LOT now too, I feel like it's mocking me hey soon-to-be-mom its FUN in here! why should I want to come out! Its amazing how much space the babe has to shift around! I can feel complete rotations, basically. I will miss that part of being pregnant for sure, so I am trying to enjoy it

mom to z (June 2009) and m (may 2011)

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#8 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 01:35 PM
 
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Ok, are we sharing bodies? Cuz seriously, my fake labor contractions have totally stopped, and I'm barely getting any BH anymore. Also, my baby decided to throw a party in my pelvis last night, and today is doing push ups off my bladder!

I have to say that at this point I'd prefer the calmness to the fake labor. I'm not terribly uncomfortable, just impatient.

Ashley, Pagan treehugger.gif mama to E (6/09) and my beautiful hbac.gif baby T (4/3/12)
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#9 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 02:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok, are we sharing bodies? Cuz seriously, my fake labor contractions have totally stopped, and I'm barely getting any BH anymore. Also, my baby decided to throw a party in my pelvis last night, and today is doing push ups off my bladder!

I have to say that at this point I'd prefer the calmness to the fake labor. I'm not terribly uncomfortable, just impatient.
yeah, its true the fake labor is annoying. I only had a few episodes of that, and only one that did really fool me, and they were all in the 38th week. That's whats strange, I thought it meant I'd go sooner than this ! Lost the plug, had diarrhea, bad terrible cramps, tons of BH's, a few times that week (one that was enough to make me think things were starting though)

So then by week 39, no more cramping feelings, no more BH's, etc. I feel calm also, its way too surreal! And the baby I guess is taking advantage of the calm moment to do cartwheels? all very strange. Although if there's two of us w/ this pattern maybe its not so weird Ill keep an eye out and hope that when you go I'll be soon to follow

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#10 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 02:43 PM
 
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I had no BH contrations. My baby didn't "drop" until well into labor-- like after 6 cm. My water never broke. I never lost my "plug". I had no signs of labor at all except for some bloody show starting just before the contractions started. I just woke up one morning at about 5 am with contractions, and had Robert by 8:10 that evening.

Seriously, you never know when labor is going to start, especially for first-timers like us!

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#11 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 03:11 PM
 
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My first was very much like what you are describing, only I did lose some of my plug, but that was hours into a regular contracting pattern and I NEVER dilated before labor started.

My water didn't break, my midwife broke it when I was dilated to a 10 and he was STILL fairly high.

I was 41 weeks when he was born and my mom had c-sections so the OB on call was trying to scare me into thinking I would probably need one too. Well I didn't (with that one at least). It took a while, but he did come into the world.

Now that I have been pregnant a million times and my hips fall apart, this baby has engaged really early, but that is because the whole area down there has been used to so much, he has plenty of space.
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#12 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 04:07 PM
 
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My first never dropped. I never even started dilating before the real work began - no bloody show, no mucus plug appearance, never even felt a BH contraction, nothing.
Same with me for my first or second (well, they did drop a bit, even this baby has dropped so so much for that whole theory of after your first baby doesn't drop until labor!) But I with the first two births I haven't had any signs of impending labor either-I just went to bed one night feeling like my regular old self and then woke up sometime later having contractions. I'm 40w5d today too, and I woke up this morning with contractions and I was really getting excited thinking that today was the day, but after 2 hours they fizzled out and nothing else has happened-and that's even more frustrating than just waiting!

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Seriously, you never know when labor is going to start, especially for first-timers like us!

:
Or second or third timer I haven't had any pre-labor "signs" with any of mine, except the little episode this morning, which could mean that real labor is coming or I could be here another week! I have no clue.

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#13 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 05:28 PM
 
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seafox and sunflwrmoonbeam, I'm with you both - I totally felt much closer to labor at 38 weeks than I do now, there were so many signs. No I'v pretty much quit thinking it's ever going to happen, but I guess it will. Weird.
Anyway, nice to know I'm not the only one!
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#14 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 06:25 PM
 
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I guess I'm looking for a story where someone felt super far away from labor and it all happened super fast when least expecting it
any advice? Can labor just come on super suddenly even when not dilated, engaged, etc? Its the lack of 'dropping' that worries me, it seems like w/ first-time moms that usually happens a week or two out from labor? And hasn't happened yet. But maybe that's a function of all the fluid?
Well it happened to me this time! I totally expected I would be induced. At my last 2 prental appointments, I got checked and was fingertip dilated and baby was still high . I was going to let my midwife sweep my membranes if she could, but couldn't get in. I was very discouraged and figured I'd go in for my induction at 41 weeks. But nope, labor happened on its own (2 days before I hit 41 wks) and it went very quickly! I'll never doubt my body again!

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#15 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 07:11 PM
 
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Why does your OB want to induce? For dates only?

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#16 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 08:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Why does your OB want to induce? For dates only?
its hospital policy not to let past 42wks, and annoyingly they don't induce on Sundays, which is when I'd hit 42wks! So I really get shortchanged there and only get to 41wks 6 days

I just hope it happens before then, its just w/ everything I read, I think exactly 14 days late isn't THAT weird, so its annoying that I can't go that far. Plus that Sunday is the new moon, etc!

my ob is cool, she knows that the stillbirth rate going up past 42wks *isn't* really for folks like me (she said i don't have risk factors for that, etc) but can't go against policy if I want to deliver at this hospital, etc. I just wish I fudged my LMP by one day so that I'd have until that monday! Ah well. Hopefully things happen before then.

Today I tried some 'natural' induction w/ the mr. this AM and all day I've been having a LOT more cervix pressure and cramping, so here's hoping this is all moot Ill go on a long walk tomorrow also, and sit on a fitness ball while quilting tonite

thanks for the stories though, I feel better now about the baby not being engaged yet. I think two books I have both say that it happens 'a week or more before labor in first-time moms' and only say it might not if you aren't a first-time mom, so that was just discouraging me. Its good to know that dropping CAN occur pretty fast and w/ labor onset!

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#17 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 09:01 PM
 
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Couldn't you just refuse to be induced and then go in when you're in labor? I mean, what hospital is going to turn you away if you're in active labor when you show up?

I seriously don't get this kind of crap. It seriously infuriates me. Isn't the avg first baby born at like 41w5d or something along those lines? So then why is only 2 days past that such a hard cutoff? Hospitals can be so annoying......

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#18 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 09:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Couldn't you just refuse to be induced and then go in when you're in labor? I mean, what hospital is going to turn you away if you're in active labor when you show up?

I seriously don't get this kind of crap. It seriously infuriates me. Isn't the avg first baby born at like 41w5d or something along those lines? So then why is only 2 days past that such a hard cutoff? Hospitals can be so annoying......
I might bring this up w/ the OB next week, I'm not sure what they'd do if I refused induction or not. It does seem odd that there's such a hard cutoff, and I wouldn't be as upset if I could go to 42wks 1 day instead. Given, that as she said, 96% of folks do go into labor in those two weeks; but w/out that last day the percentages might be different! I don't know.

It is annoying. I think requiring another stress test or u/s at 42 and then deciding would make much more sense. She's definitely understanding about it, so maybe she'd help me fudge a date if i had to, to get that extra day! (or really two days) Its odd, its a pretty crunchy hospital, w/ midwives and birthing stools and a very relaxed attitude towards birth. But there are some rules I guess they can't break or something!

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#19 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 09:57 PM
 
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It's good that your OB isn't doing scare tactics, that it's just a policy issue. But that is infuriating. I agree with pp that they can't turn you away if you show up in active labor, and I agree with you that if you went to your OB and said "I was thinking....I might have been wrong about my dates...." wink, wink, that that could work for both of you. Also consider just calling on your induction date to cancel the induction for other reasons -- family emergency, etc etc. The "emergency" being that you need to take care of your unborn child, whose needs are not addressed by their hospital policy.

Have you seen this page: http://birthlove.cyclzone.com/pages/ten_month_mama.html ?
There are some comments from OB's about halfway down, and some medical issues addressed around the same spot, that will be encouraging to you.

Have you thought about acupuncture?

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#20 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 10:16 PM
 
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I've wondered that too. What if you just don't show up for the scheduled induction? It's not like they are going to come to your house and force you? They make that policy just as CYA insurance so you can't sue them if something goes wrong.
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#21 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 10:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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It's good that your OB isn't doing scare tactics, that it's just a policy issue. But that is infuriating. I agree with pp that they can't turn you away if you show up in active labor, and I agree with you that if you went to your OB and said "I was thinking....I might have been wrong about my dates...." wink, wink, that that could work for both of you. Also consider just calling on your induction date to cancel the induction for other reasons -- family emergency, etc etc. The "emergency" being that you need to take care of your unborn child, whose needs are not addressed by their hospital policy.

Have you seen this page: http://birthlove.cyclzone.com/pages/ten_month_mama.html ?
There are some comments from OB's about halfway down, and some medical issues addressed around the same spot, that will be encouraging to you.

Have you thought about acupuncture?

that is one cool thing about my OB, she actually has an acupuncturist that comes in every wednesday for folks (turning mostly, but also inductions, etc) so I can do that this wednesday if I am still pregnant. Then I see her on Thursday for scheduling the sat induction - so at that point, if the acupuncture doesn't work, and if I am STILL in a bad bishop score area (induction likely to fail) maybe Ill suggest the nudge nudge wink wink to eek it out until Monday. Given that she did say the whole 95% give birth in those two weeks I think as long as I pass the stress test I should get the FULL two weeks!

I do hope this all ends up being moot, however lets hope this weekend brings on some labor

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#22 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 10:18 PM
 
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Yep, I was just thinking that you don't have to go in if they schedule you for an induction. It's not like someone from the hospital is going to show up at your front door. If it were me I'd try to fudge your lmp date a little with your ob, then just not show up if you make it to the induction date. Hopefully your LO will just come out before then!

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#23 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 10:25 PM
 
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My car would break down over the weekend and I might not have the money to get it fixed until who knows when. As far as I know they cannot refuse treatment for you if you go into labor and show up.

 
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#24 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 11:06 PM
 
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Have you seen this page: http://birthlove.cyclzone.com/pages/ten_month_mama.html ?
There are some comments from OB's about halfway down, and some medical issues addressed around the same spot, that will be encouraging to you.
What a great site! Wish I'd known of it earlier
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#25 of 29 Old 06-12-2009, 11:42 PM
 
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with my kids, I only remember feeling the dropping heaviness like the day before birth, and I didn't even regonize it as such until after the baby was born. My first was a week early, so not your situation, but the next 2 were 10 days "late". I felt normal as normal until labor! Well, with the second, I remember walking around a store the night before feeling more uncomfortable than normal, the bowling ball feeling, but didn't think of it as the baby dropping.

So I feel like I went from normal to labor for sure. We never got cervical checks or anything, so I don't know how far dialated I was. But I know with the late babies I had tons of BH.

Just trust your body and your baby--easier said than done for sure!!! A week is a long time for change at this point in the game. Try to ignore your doc as much as possible and just follow your instincts!
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#26 of 29 Old 06-13-2009, 09:07 PM
 
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Thinking about you seafox. Sending you labor vibes so you get your natural non-induction birth!

  SAHM CrossFitting mama to DS (6) and DD (3) and surprise #3 due in September!  winner.jpg familybed1.gif homebirth.jpg

 

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#27 of 29 Old 06-14-2009, 01:34 AM - Thread Starter
 
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thanks! I went for a long walk today, had some fun w/ the mr. and I do think the babe is at least lowering a bit. I felt a LOT more cervix pressure all day today, and tonite have actually had some serious cramping feelings and few contractions to go with them it seems. I also changed to sitting on a yoga ball when I quilt which seems to be helping lowering the babe a bit.

I had a nice chat w/ a doula tonite at a bbq who did say that I could really refuse induction. She seemed to think that my doc probably does think its moot and that Ill go before the date - but that if I did show up this coming thursday w/ the babe still as high and only 1cm dilated still, that she'd probably be more open to letting me go a little longer as long as I got another u/s and signed something or whatnot.

so that made me feel a bit better. She also said that acupuncture has really worked for many of her clients, so knowing I have that option on Wednesday is making me a bit less stressed.


so more walking and fun w/ the mr. tomorrow, and I am taking Monday off as well for my u/s (stress test) so another day where we can walk some more, eat some spicy food, etc.


but it is good to hear that folks can go from 0 to 60 labor-wise! Ill just try and focus on each day and not pay attention to the 'end date' and hope that I can get around it if it comes to that anyway!

mom to z (June 2009) and m (may 2011)

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#28 of 29 Old 06-15-2009, 12:41 AM
 
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Hope things speed along this week so you don't even have to worry about an induction day - baby arrival vibes are on their way!
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#29 of 29 Old 06-15-2009, 10:50 AM
 
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I didn't have any warning of labor with my first two. Baby did drop with #2, but not with #1 or #3. And with #3, I was fingertip dilated and 50% effaced 5 days before he was born. So not a ton of action there for a 3rd time mom.

Absolutely refuse the induction if there's no medical reason to do one. You'll likely go before then, but if not, as long as you and baby are healthy, there's no reason to follow "hospital policy". You have the right to refuse induction, and if you show up in labor at 43 weeks, the hospital can't legally turn you away. Your doctor would still show up and catch the baby, etc. Their policy is to schedule you for an induction, but you don't have to follow hospital policy. It's the doctors/nurses that have to follow those policies.

Mama to Tornado Boy (6/04), The Brute (11/06), and Mischief (05/09)... expecting in February '15
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