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#1 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:33 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Does anyone mind if I whine for a minute? So, hubby left... our 1st deployment, oh joy. This should be a short one, 4-6 months, but it still sucks!! DS screamed bloody murder when we had to leave his Daddy and wouldn't let go of them, way to break my heart kid. He seems to be doing ok right now, but he is used to Daddy being gone during the day.. we will see how he does tonight when we get to bathtime which is usually a him and Daddy thing. DH did record himself reading a story to DS though so maybe that will help. I am just really hoping the next 4-ish months go really fast, I miss him so much!!

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#2 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:37 AM
 
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#3 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:43 AM
 
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Hi mama, I can only imagine how hard it is to be without your dh for months at a time. Do you have family or friends who will be able to help you out?

Attached, homeschooling mom to Sam (10), Henry (8), Clara (5--now in public school Kindergarten) and Noah (2)

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#4 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:45 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi mama, I can only imagine how hard it is to be without your dh for months at a time. Do you have family or friends who will be able to help you out?
I know a few people down here... kind of. We just moved to Louisiana in mid-August so we are still pretty new down here!! Luckily my mom rocks and bought me a plane ticket to come home for Turkey Day through New Years so I will be at home for like a month and a half, which is awesome because I was dreading spending all of Trevor's first holidays alone!!!

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#5 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:59 AM
 
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My DH is a doctor (resident), so he works long hours and we were without him for a couple of months last summer (he moved out of state three months before we did). It was awful, but we got through it. I can't even imagine the additional challenges of being a military spouse. I'm glad you have support from your family and won't be alone over the holidays.
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#6 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 01:02 PM
 
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Super big hugs! Is he safe while he is gone?

Erin sharing life with a burly husband and two rad boys 7/06 & 5/09 : : Zone 9-ish
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#7 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 01:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Super big hugs! Is he safe while he is gone?
Who knows really... the area he is going is supposedly one of the safer ones, but he is in a war zone so that statement needs to be taken with a grain of salt!! I have faith that he is going to come home safe and sound... but I wish time would go faster!!

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#8 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 01:10 PM
 
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That's really rough.

Mara, mama to two boys born 05/2009 and 04/2011, after four miscarriages. 

Also: chicken3.gif  dog2.gif

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#9 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 01:37 PM
 
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nurse, mama, doula-in-training to J-14, J-13, S-7, S-4, and P-2(born at home)
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#10 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 01:46 PM
 
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I can't even imagine what this must be like for you and your little one, not to mention you DH. You are one strong Mama!

Carlin blowkiss.gif - loving life with DH guitar.gif and 2 amazing daughtersenergy.gifbaby.gif

 

 

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#11 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 01:57 PM
 
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I'm so sorry, mama! I hope the next 4 months is a great bonding time for you and DS, but that it goes very quickly for you!
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#12 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:23 PM
 
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Originally Posted by chely7425 View Post
I am just really hoping the next 4-ish months go really fast, I miss him so much!!
I'm sorry you guys have to be separated and hope that he comes home quickly and safely. It's awesome that you get to spend the holidays with family and not alone though. I'm dreading our first deployment which is supposed to be late next year.

 dreads.gif  ribbonyellow.gif Proud Army Wife to DH ribbonyellow.gif  mama to one busy boy blahblah.gif and his dog2.gif  
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#13 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:35 PM
 
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(Sorry for crashing this ddc again (I'm in Feb), but this one speaks to me...)

You'll make it. Deployments are tough...I know. We're rounding the corner to start our third. We're still not sure if he'll be here when the baby's born. He left 2 weeks before my dd was born for his first deployment. He got home from his second deployment 9 days before ds was born. I found out I was pg with ds 2 weeks AFTER dh left, so he missed the entire pg, except that bit at the end. Ah but, home is relative. He's gone (stateside) somewhere at least 1/2 the time he's not deployed, if not more. That's the life for us...

DD was 17 months when dh left on the 2nd deployment. She wasn't too upset at him leaving...she didn't seem to think it was any different than him going to work, and I was very careful to be upbeat about it. Whew...that's the hardest part, isn't it? Swallowing your emotions for your children, and going home by yourself. I find I always sigh big...then "go internal" and just push through.

Heads up, though. There was a group of about 9 wives who were really close on the 2nd trip. We had all been together for the first deployment as well, and all had babies while the guys were gone. ALL of the babies (who were about 14-17 months old when the guys left the 2nd time) were stinkers for a good month. They just wouldn't cooperate with anything. So...if your ds suddenly seems to go bonkers for a few weeks...just ride it out and don't be overally concerned. He'll adjust to the new routine and be himself again.

Hey...pm me if you want to commiserate...

You CAN do this. And with grace. Hugs.

"If you keep doing the same things you've always done, you'll keep getting the same results you've always gotten."

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#14 of 25 Old 11-01-2008, 11:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks so much guys!! I know this will go fast and we signed up for this.... but at the same time he JUST got home from 6 months of OSUT training 6 months ago!!! Oh well, I just need to whine a bit...

Just1More... thanks for the PM offer, I will probably take you up on it!!! I know we will be fine and nothing is going to break us... but DS is already going bonkers. He keeps crawling to the door and sitting by it crying... poor little thing. Hopefully he settles down soon!!

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#15 of 25 Old 11-02-2008, 06:09 AM
 
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I can relate! In January DH starts his "predeployment work-up" which means he's home between 4-8 days a month and in July he leaves until Feb. So he's probably missing the birth (they do a 3 mo det before the 6 mo one) and then he'll get about 4 weeks w/new baby before he leaves until Feb. I'm trying not to let it get me down but as you know, it's hard sometimes!

Can you order one of those "Daddy dolls" for DS? I did deployments w/little ones and it seemed that once we got into our own routine, they did much better. Unfortunately, I think it gets harder as they get older. This last deployment (came home in May) was the hardest so far, and we've done 6. (3 with kids)

mama to DD9, coolshine.gif DS7 bouncy.gif and DD1.luxlove.gif

 
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#16 of 25 Old 11-02-2008, 08:49 AM
 
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I think the recordings are a great idea.
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#17 of 25 Old 11-02-2008, 11:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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What is a "Daddy Doll"? DH did make DS a build-a-bear that says "Hi Trevor, this is Daddy, I love you and miss you!!" and DS really likes that! Its good to know I'm not alone... I just wish we had a little longer between him finishing training and deploying. This should be a short one though... just need to keep telling myself that!!

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#18 of 25 Old 11-02-2008, 10:29 PM
 
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http://www.hugahero.com/

This is the site. My friend has them for her sons (DH just left for Afghanistan) and they really like theirs.

mama to DD9, coolshine.gif DS7 bouncy.gif and DD1.luxlove.gif

 
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#19 of 25 Old 11-02-2008, 11:26 PM
 
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And I want to say thank you to your husband and to your family. I hope Trevor has a good night tonight, and that you also find peace.

Hugs, mama!

Married to my best friend, expecting #1 6/09. Little angel came early- 4/10/09, 2lbs 5oz. Lilah Grace:
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#20 of 25 Old 11-02-2008, 11:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by MangoMommy View Post
http://www.hugahero.com/

This is the site. My friend has them for her sons (DH just left for Afghanistan) and they really like theirs.
That is so cool!!! I totally want one... I am going to try and find a picture to use!!! I think Trevor would really like it...

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#21 of 25 Old 11-03-2008, 01:49 PM
 
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deployments are never easy. Sounds like you know to just keep busy, and do not dwell to much on hubby being gone. I always focused on the homecoming instead.... I know your son is young, but talk to him about Daddy. I think your husband prerecording the stories is a great idea. Before you know it he will be home. Plus, you have the new baby to keep you occupied while he is gone. The first month suck, but then it starts to fly.... Feel free to PM me if you need to talk.

Janet ~ Wife to Bryon (Ret. USN), Mama to Korbyn(12)homebirth.jpg, Koltyn (7)homebirth.jpgribboncesarean.gif, and Kashlynn (6/23/09)vbac.gif Our long awaited little girl!! ... a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (proverbs 31:30)

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#22 of 25 Old 11-03-2008, 01:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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deployments are never easy. Sounds like you know to just keep busy, and do not dwell to much on hubby being gone. I always focused on the homecoming instead.... I know your son is young, but talk to him about Daddy. I think your husband prerecording the stories is a great idea. Before you know it he will be home. Plus, you have the new baby to keep you occupied while he is gone. The first month suck, but then it starts to fly.... Feel free to PM me if you need to talk.
Thank you

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#23 of 25 Old 11-08-2008, 03:16 AM
 
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Feel free to PM me too - we are on a four month deployment after only a three month break following a one year deployment. Military is fun, right?

I also find that having small goals for yourself can help.

We also use iPhoto to make story books (you can google to find custom board books) with our own photos of Daddy - they become favorites.

Your User Agreement here at MDC, read it and make it your friend and read the FAQ to answer all the questions of the (MDC) world.
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#24 of 25 Old 11-08-2008, 11:42 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks I can't believe you guys only got a 3 month break between deployments!! That has to be so hard...

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#25 of 25 Old 11-08-2008, 06:50 PM
 
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I hope time flies for you. Deployments are no fun. My hubby will be going on his 3rd soon after this baby is born. He was gone for our son's first 10 months of life. It is hard!

: Mom to a wonderful teen girl, a happy little boy and a cute baby girl
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