struggling to keep it all together - Mothering Forums

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Old 11-07-2008, 08:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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am i the only one struggling to keep it together? i feel so sick and tired and literally can barely get off the couch. dd is a wreck from my strange behavior and my house, which is normally immaculate, is constantly in shambles. i don't remember being like this the first time around. am i just being a baby? should i just man up and clean and deal? or are other people feeling the same?
dh is being great, but i think is sick of it all. i am only 7 weeks, so it will be a while until i am normal again.

thanks!
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Old 11-07-2008, 08:32 PM
 
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I feel your pain mama. I bawled like a baby this morning because I was sooo nauseous and all I wanted to do is clean my house (I'm a neat freak). I've always been a strongly independent person so its difficult for me to have to depend on people to do little things like clean my house. It's just sooo frustrating.

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Old 11-07-2008, 08:34 PM
 
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You are so not alone. If you're that worried about the cleaning and stuff, try to just do a little bit if you get a bit of energy. Like I'll empty the dishwasher while I'm waiting for something to heat up in the microwave. That's all I can muster up the energy for, so my house is a mess, too.
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Old 11-07-2008, 09:15 PM
 
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I'm *sort of* with you and sort of not... in that I'm not struggling to keep it together, I just let IT ALL GO. I work full-time and all available energy has to go to that (thankfully it doesn't take that much!) and when I come home I just crash on the sofa. We've been living off take-out mostly, the house is TRASHED (except for some that DH cleaned up on his day off, bless him), laundry gets done on a what-we-need-for-tomorrow basis, (Do we have any clean socks? Yes, they're in the dryer.) I haven't taken the dog on our used-to-be-daily long, special walk in a month. The errands I've put off running would take a four-day weekend to get done now. The way I see it, nothing else is important compared to this embryo, so if I have to rest, I have to rest. Period. I know it's totally different when there are kids at home, though.

Mara, mama to two boys born 05/2009 and 04/2011, after four miscarriages. 

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Old 11-07-2008, 09:16 PM
 
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I'm feeling the same way too right now (also about 7 wks)... it's terrible
Just putting in a load of laundry in feels like a great feat most days.

Amanda , mama to my two boys: N (10/06) and : A (7/09)
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Old 11-07-2008, 11:15 PM
 
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Yup, our house seems to be a complete disaster no matter what I do (which is very little at the moment). All my extra energy is going into my toddler. In fact, I've ended up looking around the last few weeks for some daycare for her for just like 3 mornings a week. I think it will be more stimulating for her, and will hopefully give her a big girl thing she does that will (hopefully?!) help ease the transition when the new baby comes. I found a nice home childcare near us where the lady only has 3 other kids at the moment, and takes a maximum of 5. DD seems really happy there so hopefully it will be good. Starting next week. Fingers crossed!!

Jessica, Wife to Owen (6/7/03), mom to Amina (9/20/06) : and Colm (5/30/09) :

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Old 11-07-2008, 11:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
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this makes me feel so much better! i really was beginning to feel like something is wrong with me that i can't just suck it up and get everything done. i am so glad to know i am not alone. dd is going to school 1.5 days a week and she loves it now more than ever! i highly recommend it, nyakanyasko. she was totally luke warm about it before i started to fall apart and now she asks everyday if she can go. i am glad she has the consistency because home life has been consisting of me lying on the couch, dh getting take-out or making something easy, and her playing alone. oy!

thanks ladies
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Old 11-08-2008, 01:48 AM
 
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I'm in the same boat. I'm basically worthless when I'm pregnant. I live on the couch while my toddler destroys the house and my 11yo whines about how bored she is. I keep telling everyone that this is temporary, but at times it's even hard for me to remember that.

: Mom to a wonderful teen girl, a happy little boy and a cute baby girl
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Old 11-08-2008, 09:32 AM
 
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As I'm sitting here looking at a sink full of dishes and a cluttered kitchen counter? YA! I feel so much more nauseaus than last time and so much more tired and just BLEH. I worked full time last time and I have to say I think that is why I wasn't so tired. I got BREAKS and when it was time to go home that's all I had to do! Go home and relax. This time I have a toddler and I'm a SAHM so I get NO BREAKS, the work is neverending, and there isn't any time to relax that doesn't entail getting my toddler to fall asleep first, and then once he is asleep I always feel as if I'm not sleeping too I'm screwed! It's a hard balance. I can't imagine that mamas who have more than one kiddo around. Yowzer.

So ya the household stuff can wait (just don't ask my husband's opinion on that because it is quite contradictory to mine)

Erin sharing life with a burly husband and two rad boys 7/06 & 5/09 : : Zone 9-ish
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Old 11-08-2008, 09:40 AM
 
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I am the exact way. I literally did not go downstairs in my house for five days. I spend most days in bed, and the days that I have to get up I stay on the couch. I have not bit of housework, errands, or cooking in over a month.

I also did not feel this way with ds.
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Old 11-08-2008, 07:25 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlissfullyLoving View Post
I am the exact way. I literally did not go downstairs in my house for five days. I spend most days in bed, and the days that I have to get up I stay on the couch. I have not bit of housework, errands, or cooking in over a month.

I also did not feel this way with ds.

That's me too. My house is a disaster. DH is helping with the laundry and sometimes the dishes (I have both sides overfull right now), clutter and crumbs are everywhere, doghair, you name it. It's making me sicker LOL. I just can't move, I feel like crap all day long and usually wake up at 5am feeling nauseated.

I feel like a HORRIBLE mom because DH has been getting a lot of take-out. Last night was Taco Del Mar, the night before, Subway, ugg. I am just so unmotivated, I need to hit the grocery store BAD and just buy some frozen meals or something. I feel so much guilt from how bad my family is eating but I feel like my whole body is full of lead and is so tired. I slept 12 hrs last night and had to DRAG myself up at 9am because I do have kids to tend to, LOL. (luckily they aren't too young)

Tomorrow is my birthday and DH keeps asking what I want to do,etc and I told him, I feel like I'm in a horrible fog and nothing sounds fun. I just want to lay in bed. And then I feel guilty again. We live in Hawaii and haven't been to the beach in 2 months, I don't feel like it.

Anyway...the exhaustion, lightheadedness,etc is kicking my butt!!! I'm taking my prenatals but I have to skip a day or 2 because the iron is causing digestive issues as well.

Come on 2nd semester!

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Old 11-09-2008, 04:31 AM
 
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Yeah.

I sat in the middle of my living room and cried this evening, because I was trying to hard to clean up but I was so sick I couldn't sit upright. I was leaning over and trying to pick up the tortilla chips my kids had strewn all over the carpet and gagging.

We have four kids in a small 3 br. apartment ~ it takes them less than five minutes to trash the place. It's a disaster. Dh is pitching in a lot when he's home, but he works quite a bit so it's still mostly on me. And me? I'm too ill to move much of the time. I'm doing what I can when I can, but the disorder is starting to really get to me. I like order and cleanliness! This chaos is almost as miserable as the constant nausea.
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