Purple hair....or not - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 08:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Here is the thing...my homeschooled kids are starting PS next week..they are going into 4th, 3rd and 1st grade. I have hair that is usually pink or purple. Since they are going to school I went back to a natural shade, but I hate it, my dh isn't too fond, and my kids miss my hair being purple (they can find me easier they say)
I went back to a natural shade because I didn't want to provide a reason for kids to tease my kids, or for parents to not want their kids to be friends with my kids (we live in an area not too tolerant of those things)

I miss my hair. I asked my kids what they thing, and they said they wished I would go to back to purple...I asked if kids ever said anything rude about my hair and they said "no, actually they think it's really cool"

What do you think? Im learning to be ok with this big huge change in our lives and want to make sure that Im not providing a potential issue. kwim?
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#2 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 09:12 PM
 
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Go back to your purple hair!

There is a good possibility it will be a non-issue (and if it is - you can address it then)
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#3 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 09:48 PM
 
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I love the old quote from Sandy Denny of Fairport Convention, "I must be myself, and I will be alright."

 
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#4 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 09:56 PM
 
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Be purple!!! It's you!

There are all kinds of a parents at school, and it doesn't take long to figure out that there's no correlation between what the parents look like and how much they love their kids and how well they care for them.

The other moms might refer to you as "the one with the purple hair" for a bit before they learn your name, but that's OK.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#5 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 10:03 PM
 
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PURPLE!

Do it, do it, do it!

Don't let the other parents dictate who you are.

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#6 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 10:26 PM
 
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Oh, go for it. You might not even end up being the only one with colored hair and if you are, so what. There's a mom at my son's school who wears totally bizarre (from my point of view) clothes. So what? She's very sweet with her daughter, and that counts much more.
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#7 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 10:31 PM
 
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Go with the hair you feel comfortable in!

I'd hang out with a mom with purple hair, and I look fairly conservative. Basically, I'd like purple hair but I know I'd never keep it up and I'd end up with purple hair and dark blond roots in no time! LOL
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#8 of 24 Old 08-20-2010, 10:40 PM
 
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I wouldn't worry about having purple hair unless it actually causes problems. FWIW, I have multiple visible tattoos (and dh is covered) and I'm pretty conservative and run in very conservative Roman Catholic circles and it's never been an issue None of my friends have tattoos or would ever get one, but they've never acted bothered by mine.
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#9 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 02:29 AM
 
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The other kids will most likely think of you as the cool mom.

Being teased has very little to do with what a person looks or dresses like. Though a physical attribute or garment may become the focal point of teasing, it isn't why the person is teased. Teasing has to do with social rank and vulnerability.

Teaching your children to be confident and cool headed will prevent them from being teased, changing who you are won't.

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#10 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 02:50 AM
 
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do it!
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#11 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 02:55 AM
 
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Why should your kids going to public school mean you can't have purple hair? Go for it.

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#12 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 04:01 AM
 
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I'd go back to a color you like.

I'm horribly fashion conservative and would never ever have purple or pink hair. But, if you want to do it? So what?

Let people know who you are. If they can't see past the hair, so be it. But I'll be willing to bet you aren't the first mom at the school to have funky colored hair.

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#13 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 09:21 AM
 
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Honestly, no one cares at most schools. They really don't.
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#14 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 11:39 AM
 
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I have purple hair, and my kids go to public school. Last year it was neon pink and the only attention that I got was positive. It is a total non-issue. I attend school events/functions, IEP's, field trips and have not once had an issue. Don't let what other people might think deter you from being yourself. I am also HEAVILY tattood. Kids ask questions, and luckily the adults have acted... well, adult!

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#15 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 01:30 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eepster View Post
The other kids will most likely think of you as the cool mom.

Being teased has very little to do with what a person looks or dresses like. Though a physical attribute or garment may become the focal point of teasing, it isn't why the person is teased. Teasing has to do with social rank and vulnerability.

Teaching your children to be confident and cool headed will prevent them from being teased, changing who you are won't.
This.

Honestly, if the people in the school community (staff, parents, students) judge appearances, it won't matter if you have purple hair or if you look like the Queen of England. They'll find some reason to criticize.

I've known people who unfairly judge the ultra-conservatively dressed mom wearing a power business suit as cold and ruthless. It works both ways.
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#16 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 04:45 PM
 
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Another vote for go back to purple hair. Why stress yourself out?

Enjoy being you!

Yes, yes.  I'm fabulous. loveeyes.gif  Moving on...

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#17 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 04:59 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eepster View Post
The other kids will most likely think of you as the cool mom.

Being teased has very little to do with what a person looks or dresses like. Though a physical attribute or garment may become the focal point of teasing, it isn't why the person is teased. Teasing has to do with social rank and vulnerability.

Teaching your children to be confident and cool headed will prevent them from being teased, changing who you are won't.
Yup, yup, yup. Kids are awesome like that. If your kids like it, why wouldn't other kids?
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#18 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 05:38 PM
 
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I saw go purple but only if you post a pic
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#19 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 06:49 PM
 
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Offering another perspective. I am a Pre K teacher and I have had purple hair, pink hair and blue hair. Not one parent has complained. I would know about it ASAP from my boss and the general gossip mill. I often hear about other teachers that get complained about so I know I would hear it about myself. I don't think people judge as harshly as we assume them to.

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#20 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 08:42 PM
 
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In the elementary school I was at we had a parent come in with their hair a non-traditional color and their child's hair that same color. One of the teachers said that is they child you always hope is in someone else's class and the other teachers who were around agreed. I think that you can help the teacher's move past that belief if they have it, but it may have some effect on how you are viewed as a parent and whether the teachers even think of you as a person to come to for any reason about your child or volunteering. It isn't right, they should judge you based on who you are once they know you, but it isn't what always happens. If you are a young parent or look young you also have that stacked against you and adding purple hair into the mix may mean you have to work a lot harder to be taken seriously. I think you should do what feels right, but keep in mind that it may require some work on your part.
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#21 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 09:07 PM
 
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I am thinking the vast majority of kids will think the hair is very cool. The parents on the other hand could very well have a problem with it. I know here where I live it would go over like a lead balloon. However I think that you should do it and not worry about what others think.

I would actually let my kids do the hair in colors if they ever wanted to but it is against the rules as are unusual haircuts.

 
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#22 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 09:50 PM
 
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I saw a purple-haired mom at kindergarten orientation last year and it actually made me feel really relieved and happy, because I have visible tattoos and am a hippie style dresser who recently moved to what I perceive to be a very non-diverse, conservative community.

We pulled DD out of school before I could make friends with her, though.
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#23 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 10:50 PM
 
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Can you guess what my answer is?
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#24 of 24 Old 08-21-2010, 11:12 PM
 
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Go for the purple.Dd and I are thinking of dyeing our hair too.

Student mama to one awesome,talented and unique dd,15 and one amazing, sweet and strong ds,12(born with heart defect Tetralogy of Fallot,also on the autism spectrum),9 cats,and 2 gerbils.
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