Any 4th graders still believe in Santa? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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Old 12-01-2010, 08:52 AM
 
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Dd1 says she believes, but I think she's figured it out and just doesn't want to admit it. 

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Old 12-02-2010, 10:58 AM
 
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my parents lied to me about santa at least until i was 18. I started to get a hint that he wasn't really real much earlier than that, probably when I was around 7years old. but, my parents insisted that he was real. the only reason they talk to me today like i am not 4 years old is probably only because i have my own kid. when the "truth" slowly came out about santa(i.e. the literal man who lives at the north pole and travels the entire world in one night giving presents to kids), my faith and trust in my parents died with it. It didn't help that I have some sort of (undiagnosed, and thus, unknown to my parents)disorder affecting my comprehension of sarcasm and other half-truths, was made fun of for it(by said parents, as well as by peers) and lived much of my life feeling confused and having a low sense of self-worth, that i still struggle with it now.

 

I blame santa :P

 

just kidding. but i do think that the lies my parents insisted on didn't help it.


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Old 12-06-2010, 09:18 AM
 
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dsd is in 4th grade and she acts like she believes (i.e. has written a list for santa, talks about what santa will bring) but I suspect it is more for show and to play along than because she believes in the literal santa.  Idon't really feel the need to bring it up to find out for sure, but would go with the "spirit of santa" explanation if I had to.  I would have preferred to explain to dd and ds that santa is just a fun story/game to play, but dp really wanted to do the Santa thing, so here we are :)


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Old 12-25-2010, 05:23 AM
 
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My dd is in Montessori upper(age 9-12) grade 4-6. .She says some of the kids *might* still believe,but it has not been an issue like it was for my ds in his lower class(age 6-9) grade 1-3 which had some serious pro-santa kids. I am glad my ds will be in upper next year where kids control their emotions a bit better about beliefs.

 

Did you have a talk with your son? I would just do the usual talk about everyone has different beliefs,and sometimes it is better to keep your opinions to yourself.It is fine to have opinions,but it can be a problem when you are in the minority.Some people can not accept the difference and will argue their point constantly despite your wish to *agree to disagree*.

 

I am sure there will be a day or 2 after break of what santa/family gifted each child and then it will be over!

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Old 12-25-2010, 06:23 AM
 
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My DD is in 2nd grade and homeschooled. This year, she revealed that she knows that her dad and I fill her stocking. I sat quietly with her talking about the difference between pretending and a lie. I think many children don't want to disappoint their parents by telling them they know. Obviously your son is very bright; I love the Nintendo DS question. He is playing along, and hoping that you'll get him the DS to keep up with the magic. Regardless of whether you allow the DS, he is hoping you'll make an exception. 

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Old 12-25-2010, 09:38 PM
 
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I remember when I was in school, my 4th grade teacher read Superfudge to the class.  There is a part where the older brother makes a comment to his mother about Santa not being real.  Our teacher stopped reading, looked mortified, and asked if there had been anyone in the class who had still believed.  No one raised their hand, but I had a suspicion that there was at least one in the room.  So it doesn't seem unheard of...at least not 25 years ago. 

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Old 12-25-2010, 09:58 PM
 
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My son is in grade four, and he believes in Santa - or at least wants to believe in Santa. His two best friends have tried to disabuse him of this belief, but to no avail smile.gif

 

This year he left a very cute note for Santa asking him for his signature.

DS told me that the NORAD website is "proof" that Santa exists. I don't play it up, but just try to follow his lead. I worry/worried about him being teased, but it doesn't seem to be a problem. His friends tell him that his parents put the gifts under the tree, and he tells them, "you think what you want" in a kind of playful way. 

 

I've thought about it from the "lying" angle, but I don't feel that way. I look back at the Santa in my childhood, and it is one of the few connections to magic I've had in my life. I'm grateful to my parents for including Santa - one of which isn't even Christian! 

 


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Old 12-26-2010, 08:18 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daisymama12 View Post

My son is in grade four, and he believes in Santa - or at least wants to believe in Santa. His two best friends have tried to disabuse him of this belief, but to no avail smile.gif

See, this is where I get really upset at people who are mad at other kids telling the truth about Santa. A kid who really believes won't be dissuaded by what other kids say. I can see being mad if the other kids tease, or refuse to let up, but most of the time it seems that parents get mad because someone just mentioned it and their kid asked them questions.

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Old 12-26-2010, 09:57 AM
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My 2nd grader does not believe. He has never believed in any of those myths-- Santa, the tooth fairy, the easter bunny, etc. He's also a committed atheist. I swear the kid was born a skeptic. My kindergartner did believe in Santa but stopped believing sometime this month. I'm not sure why-- something at school, his brother, his own common sense, who knows. 

I know at my kid's school, the kindergartners have 5th grade buddies, and the little ones wrote letters to Santa that their 5th graders responded to as Santa. So the 5th graders definitely all know. I would be surprised if the 4th graders didn't. 

I asked my mom if Santa was real when I was in 2nd grade. She cried and it made me feel terrible. I had bad feelings about the whole thing for YEARS. So whatever you do, don't cry! 

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Old 12-26-2010, 11:13 AM
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My 8 yo. son knows the truth about the tooth fairy.  But he'll still put his tooth out "for the tooth fairy" and expect money.  Sometimes he'll slip and say, "You gave me a dollar," and then he'll change it to, "I mean, the tooth fairy gave me a dollar." 

 

So it's obvious he loves the magic involved.  So I'm not about to start a conversation about Santa, in whom he still believes.

 


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Old 12-27-2010, 05:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mattemma04 View Post

My dd is in Montessori upper(age 9-12) grade 4-6. .She says some of the kids *might* still believe,but it has not been an issue like it was for my ds in his lower class(age 6-9) grade 1-3 which had some serious pro-santa kids. I am glad my ds will be in upper next year where kids control their emotions a bit better about beliefs.



I'm all curious to see how this goes. He'll be in the older class post-holidays, right?

 

I do think you need to have it out with the principal and your ds's former teachers though. What did they do when the other kids were telling your ds he was "killing Santa" because he didn't believe? And what on EARTH was the principal thinking to call you up to pass on the other parents' complaints rather than telling the parents to teach their own kids tolerance?

 

I'm glad your ds will be out of it, but I doubt he's been the first to be bullied by the Santa-cult.

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Old 12-27-2010, 06:08 PM
 
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My DD is in 3rd grade and still believes.  She has friends that do not, and I told her that thier parents give them gifts instead.  I also told her that most people stop believing sometime during their childhood, and that she can choose if she wants to believe or not, and, when she makes the choice no longer to believe, mama will pick up the slack.  She seemed pretty happy about it.  She asked me if I still believe and I told her that I chose not to believe when I was about her age and that now I enjoy her and her sisters getting gifts from Santa.  If she pointedley asked if I am the one who puts the presents under the tree I would tell her that I do.  In our home, we believe in the spirit of Santa even as adults, so I do not feel we have deceived, and I have never lied when she asked me questions.  Having said that, I did not give her more information that what she was asking for. 


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Old 12-28-2010, 02:19 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsBirdie View Post

My DD is in 3rd grade and still believes.  She has friends that do not, and I told her that thier parents give them gifts instead.  I also told her that most people stop believing sometime during their childhood, and that she can choose if she wants to believe or not, and, when she makes the choice no longer to believe, mama will pick up the slack.  She seemed pretty happy about it.  She asked me if I still believe and I told her that I chose not to believe when I was about her age and that now I enjoy her and her sisters getting gifts from Santa.  If she pointedley asked if I am the one who puts the presents under the tree I would tell her that I do.  In our home, we believe in the spirit of Santa even as adults, so I do not feel we have deceived, and I have never lied when she asked me questions.  Having said that, I did not give her more information that what she was asking for. 

You are brilliant, and I think your solution should be posted to all the Santa-threads.
 

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