Public school, summer birthday, and timing entrance to kindergarten - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-21-2011, 01:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My oldest DD, 4, has an August birthday. The kindergarten "cut-off" around here is 5 years old by Sept 1, so she would be eligible to start kindergarten this fall. She would probably be about one week short of 5 when she starts because we start in early August around here and her birthday is the 18th. DH and I have decided to keep her at her current preschool next year where she would be with "older fours and young fives." This program is not a kindergarten or PreK and is very play-based and, to a certain extent, child-led.

 

My main reason for wanting to do this is that I want her to have one more year to play, grow, and create. She is in a Reggio preschool and loves it there. It's a half day program; kindergarten would of course be a full day program. She'll be going to public school. Even though I believe PS is the best choice for our family, I'm not exactly eager to start sending her there. I have a lot of fears, and I am not in a hurry to get her focused on "academics." I know there is a big focus on testing in schools and have been told that kindergarten is not the fun and nurturing place that it used to be. Further, I have a late August birthday myself and I feel like I was always a little emotionally behind the other kids. Many of DD's friends at school and church are her age but younger by a few weeks or a month, and they would all start the following year. She also has a close friend who is 10 months older. They would be in the same grade if she started on time, although not at the same school.

 

I mentioned this to my parents a while back and they didn't seem very supportive. It's the first of my parenting decisions that they have seriously questioned. They just can't fathom why someone wouldn't send their child to school at the earliest possible time. They're not the only ones who think that way. I have friends who are despairing that they can't send their children before 5 because they are so anxious to get them in a formal learning environment. I have also discussed this with my best friend, who has a summer (July) baby that is a year younger and will be sending her daughter "on time" right after her 5th birthday. I really value her opinion even though we don't always see eye to eye. My friend is supportive but says that she worries that my DD might be bored when she does start because she is bright. My DH could probably be convinced to go either way but for now seems okay with one more year of preschool.

 

I do think with much certainty that most people, including most professionals, would say that she is "ready." She is bright; she reads a little (I taught her using DISTAR last summer) and has good comprehension skills. She is extremely outgoing and I would say she has a high need for interaction. She has really thrived in preschool. Also, it bears mentioning that she is one of the bigger kids in her class. She doesn't appear chubby, but she's very tall for her age and she's one of the heavier kids, too, even though she doesn't have a lot of visible fat.

 

I go from feeling really certain and convicted about keeping her out of kindy next year to feeling really conflicted and wondering if I am doing the right thing. I have been accused of putting my issues of being the youngest in my class and not fitting in on my child. I have to admit this may well be the case. But what would the great harm of be of waiting one more year? The boredom thing keeps coming up. Would that really be a huge issue? I feel like the first few years of school the teacher will be dealing with kids on all different levels and having to meet them there, anyway, and after a while it won't matter as much. I mean, by the time you get to middle and high school kids are grouped more by aptitude, anyway, so if she is some kind of math genius in high school I'm sure she would have a chance to get on the Calculus track or whatever. I do worry that giving her one more year to play could backfire and make traditional schooling feel oppressive by contrast.

 

Thoughts? I especially want to hear opinions about the prospect of boredom since that's the topic that keeps coming up and I am sort of unsure about.

 

I wanted to add that a lot of people have said, "Go ahead and send her to kindy and if she's not ready to move on, she can repeat!" First, I'd rather her do another year of preschool than two years of kindy. Second, teachers/advisors would probably be part of the decision of whether to promote her or keep her back, and as long as she is academically/socially on par, I doubt they would want to keep her back. I have no reason to think she wouldn't be. I am thinking more about the long term of emotional maturity than the short term. Short term I do think she would be okay.


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Old 02-21-2011, 03:01 AM
 
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I, personally, started Kindergarten at the earliest time and was the youngest in my class.  I was later held back for two rounds of first grade not for failure to progress academically but rather for social issue.  

I did not have the birthday decision issue for DD, so she started Kindergarten at five and a half right in the middle of her class.  She’s now in year one and thriving – and she sounds a lot like your DD with the high need for social interaction and for HER going “on time” made sense.  Even though I worry because of my own experience the truth is it is not hers, and she is thriving in the school environment at the prescribed age. 

It sounds like you love your preschool and are connected to friends she has who are younger – but the truth is with an outgoing girl she is going to make new friends in school and be happier for it.  For me I think of how happy I would have been to graduate high school a bit earlier rather than being fully eighteen in year 12 – the decision you make now will impact that.

DD was in a wonderful Montessori preschool but the thing about preschool is meant to be repeated for a few years – and extending another year CAN cause boredom.  We had a friend who experienced this with her child and was surprised at the lack of evolving interpersonal relationships her son had with an extra year at pre-school where at Kindergarten even as the youngest their evolving relationships are age-appropriate and push them just a bit up the ladder….


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Old 02-21-2011, 06:50 AM
 
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I would not worry about what your friends or parents say. It is your families choice and each family makes the choice that is best for them and their children. There is no right/wrong and each child is a different situation.

 

That said, we would have sent our 4 turning 5 yr old DDs last year to K (half day) in the state we lived in at the time. They were screened and ready except for a few lingering preemie needs that I did not see resolving quickly (in a year).

 

Then we moved---different state different cut-off date. We tried to get them into K since we felt they were ready (I am a teacher and was comfortable with it), but state law is no early entry. My DDs have to wait to start K to next year at 5 turning 6. DH and are concerned they will be bored and restless. Our solution is to place them in a K/1 split class. Agewise they will be right in the middle (5-7 yr old) and academics they will be near the top (depending on subject). It is a good solution for us.

 

A few problems we ran into was classes. They were not in K- so could not be in K -age classes (community based) like the zoo classes, science programs, etc, but most of the other classes offered during the daytime (swim, dance,etc) were for 3-4 yr olds....we have done a few activities this year, but depending on how your community splits classes, you may run into the same concern.

 

A few things to consider:

 

1. Is 'waiting' common in your area (it is in ours so our will NOT be the oldest by far).

2. What does her current preschool think? They are often good judges on what students will do well in K or not.

3. Are you willing to shift things around if needed (put her in K mid-year, add supplements)?

4. Are your OK with the notion that your DD 'may' hit puberty first out of her peers and/or will be one of the larger children (it is harder for girls to be the tallest vs boys).

5. Your DD will be a solid 18 turning 19 in college age if she does not skip or accelerate.If you wait a 'gap year' then she will be 19 turing 20 before she starts and likely 24-25 when she finishes. If she chooses to go to college.

6. Is K willing to work out a schedule if you went this year? Our old state (last year) was willing to let us pull DD a few days a week due and still attend K as long as we had in it writing since school is not mandatory until age 6.

7. Are you willing to grade skip if the schools think she is advanced/gifted and then she would be youngest again. Our area does tend to suggest this for advanced 'older students' that waited for K?

8. Have you visted the K classroom and the preschool class and observed? That may also give you a good feel for what your DD will do best.

 

 

 

Good Luck. It is never an easy choice and you will get a lot of conflicting information on exactly what to do- when really, there is no way to know unless you are familiar with the school and your child.

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Old 02-21-2011, 08:32 AM
 
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I will start by saying, I'm not a fan of red-shirting (the practice of holding out age appropriate kids who are developmentally ready.) It's widely practiced in our area and we've seen lots of negatives and frustrations arise. However, it is your choice and you shouldn't worry what others around you think. Personally, I had one child who started K as a solid 5 but was just too advanced for the grade, had all sorts of issues and had to be bumped to 1st grade mid-year. My other child started at 4 y 10 m but still "right" by our district cut-offs. He was about 2 years advanced when he started but just LOVED kindergarten.

 

I would have you consider that if you do hold her out, instead of assuming K the following year, consider having her evaluated for 1st grade. She could have her extra year to play at preschool but she may develop the reading/writing/math skills at home that make 1st grade a better fit for her in 2012 than kindergarten. If the time comes and you still think kindergarten is the best fit, send her then. If she has the skills and temperment more suited for 1st, she'll be "of age" and the public school can't give you a hard time about it. If they do, just tell them you homeschooled kindergarten.


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Old 02-21-2011, 09:29 AM
 
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I'm a big fan of starting kids on time -- neither holding them back or trying to put them in early. But in my mind, there really ought to be a 30 day window -- if your child's birthday fall VERY close to the line, it would make sense to look at the specific child and decide based on where they are intellectually, socially, and with motor skills. Some kids do fine being the youngest (and some body has to be the youngest) and for some kids, being one of the older ones is really best. One of my kids birthday's fall right after the line, and it's worked out best for her to be one of the older ones. My other DD has a MAY birthday, and in one state we lived in where red shirting was common, she was one of the very youngest, which she did fine with.

 

You sound like you love the program she's in, and that giving her another year there is a gift to her. I say go with your gut. In a year or two, you can revisit this issue -- deciding later is she would be better off being one of the older ones or one of youngest ones. I don't think that giving her the extra year of half day preschool locks you into anything long term. Make this a small decision -- just about what feels right for next year.

 

And a great line for your extended family is, "I can see how you could feel that way, none the less, this is what we've decided to do."  You don't need any one's approval to go with your gut in parenting.


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Old 02-21-2011, 01:13 PM
 
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I'm making a similar decision for my DD2. I had a mid August birthday in a August 31st cut of state, and I also felt that I always not quite there emotionally with my peers. DD2 just misses the cut off here but we go to a private school and two of the girls in the preschool with birthdays the same week as her are going on to K next year, they just have to do 2 years of K to make it work legally. I have no interest in doing that with DD2 for the same reasons, I want her to play for another year before having to go to school 5 days a week. Children tend to be older here, and the ones that are younger in the grades, are obvious. DD1 is in 2nd grade in a 1/2nd classroom and it is very clear still who those students are. So while I had no option to move DD2 ahead other then having to do 2 years of K, if her birthday was another couple weeks before, I'd be making the same decision you are now. 


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Old 02-21-2011, 02:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the replies. I wish I didn't feel so torn on this. I wouldn't say I am a fan of redshirting (I am familiar with the concept), but I do worry that when other people do it there's a trickledown effect, which is something I'm concerned about. Also, she's so close to the cutoff. It's seriously just days, and the date seems so arbitrary to me. I know that studies have been done and that some school systems have played around with having cutoffs at different times of the year, and no one system has been proven to be better than another. I read somewhere about a country (maybe New Zealand?) that starts all children on their birthday, no matter what time of year the birthday falls, and you're with a peer group of kids that are within 3-6 months for the first year or two of school, eventually integrating to have grade levels spanning a year like we have hear. That sounds so nice to me, but ultimately a pipe dream since that isn't offered here. wink1.gif

 

As for what other families do around here, there's really quite a range. I could probably go either way and know people who have done the same. I know a few parents in her current preschool who are thinking along the same lines as I am for their children, and a few others who are going to send their children along to kindergarten. The preschool itself is entirely nonacademic--they don't even review ABCs, not that it matters much to me as she is already reading, comprehending, adding, etc at home--and I know the director of her preschool is entirely in favor of her remaining, but that's not shocking. Her previous preschool was a Waldorf preschool and they were of the same mind. I do know that the fancy, high end private schools in Atlanta generally don't accept summer birthdays for kindergarten, so if she was going to one of those schools it wouldn't be an issue, but we're not considering those schools. They are beyond unaffordable. We have always planned on public school.

 

Again, my concerns are really long term. I think that she would do well starting "on time," but because of my experience I feel like it might be better to be older in middle and high school. If she wasn't just days away from the cutoff, I would probably send her on without a thought. I have read discussions about this before online. There are always strong opinions, but I'm not sure if I have read a compelling argument from someone who has "redshirted" and regretted it. That's not to say I don't want to read those opinions--if they are out there I want to hear them so I can get a balanced view! I have read quite a few from people who did hold their children back and were happy with the decision, but of course every child and every situation is different. I know for me, I was a pretty mature 5 year old. I was the youngest in my class, but the best reader for the first few years of school. But I was very immature at 17. I graduated at 17 and I was NOT ready for college or adulthood.

 

Thanks again for the advice. I really appreciate it.


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Old 02-21-2011, 02:25 PM
 
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In my town there is a charter school that has extremely long waiting lists.  It is a highly sought after school and people are willing to travel quite far if they get in.  They actually have a cut-off date of June 1st and call it the "gift of time."  I see nothing wrong with keeping your dc in preschool another year if it works for your family. 

 

Other posters mentioned her age at graduation if you wait a year, another thing to consider is if you start her this fall she will be one of the youngest kids in high school and may be exposed to things before she is mature enough to handle them.

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Old 02-21-2011, 02:50 PM
 
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I'm not going to tell you what I would do in your situation, but what I am doing with my own child.

 

He'll be 5 in June and will be starting kindy this fall.  All of my friends who have kids with summer bdays are holding them back.  But that's all based on their readiness.  My kid is ready and would be bored to tears in another year of preschool.  My mom keeps pushing me to hold him back. Not because she doesn't think he's ready, but because my cousin ended up repeating kindy since he had a June bday and wasn't actually ready.

 

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Old 02-21-2011, 04:57 PM
 
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I should have added to my previous post that the charter school with the June 1st cut off for kindergarten is very rigorous academically.  I think you should think about whether the school your dc would attend is also academically rigorous or if it is more play based.

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Old 02-21-2011, 05:56 PM
 
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My oldest has a September birthday. She started an academic preschool a few weeks before her fourth birthday, this was in a state with one of the latest cut off dates of December 1st so she was not the youngest but one of the younger ones. She did great then we moved over the summer between pre-k and kindergarten. Our new state has a September 1st cutoff - no exceptions at all - and would not allow her to enter kindergarten since they do not recognize other state's cut off dates before the child is seven. There were no preschools close enough, no public preschool, she was ready for K, she understood she would be in K, and I don't think preschool is a multiyear experience to be repeated unless really needed (the way 2nd, or any, grade would be repeated). We ended up homeschooling and have been for almost two years now. She's several grades ahead in reading and a grade ahead in math. We check the scope and sequence of the public school here so if she was in school she would currently be learning letter sounds, how to count past 20, and what different weather days look like. Give me a break. She would be so bored and would act out. We're now looking at having her start at a private school this fall in the second grade.

 

I'm concerned with the current trend of 'redshirting'. In some areas it's so common that kids who are the correct age end up being left behind or made to feel slow because they're not 'old for their grade' the way most of their classmates are. If you're not comfortable with the age cut off you could always homeschool and start 'grade levels' at the time of the birthday, which is what we did. Our second oldest turned 5 in the middle of the school year and started K work then, not at an arbitrary day in August or September.

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Old 02-21-2011, 05:58 PM
 
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I agree with sitting in on one of the kindy classes if you can, and/or scheduling a 20-minute meeting with one of the kindy teachers. When I was considering what to do for DS (mid-Sept bday, Dec. 1 cut-off), the kindergarten teacher I met with was very helpful. I ended up sending him to pre-k at our play-based preschool to give him an extra year, and it was absolutely the right thing. (And yes, he is advanced academically in both reading and math but luckily it hasn't been a problem so far.)

 

I think KCMichigan's list was excellent! Best of luck.

-e


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Old 02-22-2011, 12:09 AM
 
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Quote:

Originally Posted by whatsnextmom View Post

I would have you consider that if you do hold her out, instead of assuming K the following year, consider having her evaluated for 1st grade. She could have her extra year to play at preschool but she may develop the reading/writing/math skills at home that make 1st grade a better fit for her in 2012 than kindergarten. If the time comes and you still think kindergarten is the best fit, send her then. If she has the skills and temperment more suited for 1st, she'll be "of age" and the public school can't give you a hard time about it. If they do, just tell them you homeschooled kindergarten.



I definately encourage this as well.  My DD was more than academically ready for kindergarten at 4 (we had her evaluated for early entrance, she had to be at a 5.5 year level and the test was no problem for her at 4.5).  Anyway, she just wasn't ready for a full day (or even a half-day) environment.  We instead homeschooled until she was ready to go.  At that point she went directly into the 2nd grade.  I really encourage people to make the decision that is right, for *right now.*  It sounds like for your little one that might be another year of preschool.  But that doesn't mean that kindergarten will be the best choice in another year.  In fact, if she is already reading now and it would be full day kinder or full day 1st, it sounds like just starting 1st in another year would be a great option.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by folkgirl View Post

Thanks for the replies. I wish I didn't feel so torn on this. I wouldn't say I am a fan of redshirting (I am familiar with the concept), but I do worry that when other people do it there's a trickledown effect, which is something I'm concerned about.

...

As for what other families do around here, there's really quite a range. I could probably go either way and know people who have done the same. I know a few parents in her current preschool who are thinking along the same lines as I am for their children, and a few others who are going to send their children along to kindergarten. The preschool itself is entirely nonacademic--they don't even review ABCs, not that it matters much to me as she is already reading, comprehending, adding, etc at home--and I know the director of her preschool is entirely in favor of her remaining, but that's not shocking. Her previous preschool was a Waldorf preschool and they were of the same mind. I do know that the fancy, high end private schools in Atlanta generally don't accept summer birthdays for kindergarten, so if she was going to one of those schools it wouldn't be an issue, but we're not considering those schools. They are beyond unaffordable. We have always planned on public school.

 

Again, my concerns are really long term. I think that she would do well starting "on time," but because of my experience I feel like it might be better to be older in middle and high school. If she wasn't just days away from the cutoff, I would probably send her on without a thought. I have read discussions about this before online. There are always strong opinions, but I'm not sure if I have read a compelling argument from someone who has "redshirted" and regretted it. That's not to say I don't want to read those opinions--if they are out there I want to hear them so I can get a balanced view! I have read quite a few from people who did hold their children back and were happy with the decision, but of course every child and every situation is different. I know for me, I was a pretty mature 5 year old. I was the youngest in my class, but the best reader for the first few years of school. But I was very immature at 17. I graduated at 17 and I was NOT ready for college or adulthood.

 

Thanks again for the advice. I really appreciate it.


I also have a lot of issues about the trickle down effect.  That was one reason we sent DS to kinder on time (he has an 8/31 birthday in a district with an 8/31 cut-off and heavy red shirting).  That said, in 2nd grade the social issues began causing him major issues.  He was in a 1st/2nd split and and not only were the rest of the boys in 2nd grade over 6 months older, but TWO of the 1st grade boys were older than him as well.  We actually ended up retaining him which has presented other issues.  Once again, you have to do what is right, right  now.
 

I really have come to believe that what is right for each child can be very different.  My two children are 2.5 years apart and 4 years apart in school (at this point in time).  What has been right for DD is to be one of the youngest in her class (January birthday after an August cut-off) and DS is now one of the oldest (August birthday before the cut-off).  While they are in 7th & 3rd grade this year, that does not mean they will be in 8th & 4th next year, much less 10th & 6th three years from now.  Hopefully they will be where is best for them, though!

 

Good luck with your decision! 


 

 

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Old 02-22-2011, 07:54 AM
 
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I know it's a tough decision. My twin boys were born Aug 29, in a school district with a Sept 1 cutoff. They started K at age 5; our neighbor's son, 2 months older, waited a year. My sons are juniors now, and I don't believe that starting them at 5 has been detrimental - in fact, B's 2nd grade teacher didn't realize until spring that he was the youngest in his class. As it turns out, they hit puberty and growth spurts early - had they been in a lower grade, they would have been behemoths. As it was, we were treating their acne in 5th grade - imagine if that had been 4th?

 

OTOH, we have friends whose dd missed the cutoff by 2 weeks. She was more than ready, both academically and socially, so start K as she was just about to turn 5, but her parents were concerned about her being the youngest girl in her middle and high school years. Their solution to keeping her engaged and interested, when school didn't necessarily challenge her, was to enroll her in dance and piano lessons (which she loved).


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Old 02-22-2011, 04:25 PM
 
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I think you are right to hold her back only because she has friends who will be starting next year and she likes her current preschool.  (Her friend who will go to a different school won't matter age wise as much.)

 

If it does seem like K will be a waste for her, skipping to 1st grade is always an option. If K is very academic anyway, not that huge a deal to skip it if she ends up already reading and doing math and writing and such.

 

 

ETA: I was the youngest most of the time going through school. In elementary and middle school no one realized, in high school people knew because we (the students) did birthday things and no one cared.

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Old 02-22-2011, 06:19 PM
 
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We are in the exact same position -- my dd's birthday is just 4 days before the cut-off. PS kindergarten here is very academic; the expect kids to learn to read early, there is homework, and kids are expected to sit for large portions of the day. I'm not sure whether that's ever developmentally appropriate, but it's certainly more appropriate at almost 6 than almost 5. Plus, she's been in a play-based nursery school but many kids in the public school have gone to montessori and enter kindergarten learning to read; another reason I don't want her to be the youngest.

 

Because of her birthday, she has to be either the youngest or the oldest in the class -- there's no way around that. And we've decided that she'll be better off as the oldest.


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Old 03-02-2011, 10:29 AM
 
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I started ds2 on time, with a birthday three days before the cut-off date of Sept. 1st for our district.  He is doing great and you would never guess that he is one of the youngest kids in his class.  For us it was a choice of sending him to a school with his brother, in walking distance from our home and with kids that he knows or going back to a preschool (wonderful as it was) in a different neighborhood, with a 20 minute drive each way, kids he wouldn't be going to elementary school with whether he went on time or was held back.  He had been playing after school with his brother's friends and their siblings for two years before he started kindergarten.  Now he has lots of friends, great behavior (in school), is one of the tallest kids in class despite being younger and is doing well academically.  So far, it certainly seems like we made the right choice in our situation.


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Old 03-16-2011, 09:02 PM
 
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Originally Posted by folkgirl View Post

Thanks for the replies. I wish I didn't feel so torn on this. I wouldn't say I am a fan of redshirting (I am familiar with the concept), but I do worry that when other people do it there's a trickledown effect, which is something I'm concerned about. Also, she's so close to the cutoff. It's seriously just days, and the date seems so arbitrary to me. I know that studies have been done and that some school systems have played around with having cutoffs at different times of the year, and no one system has been proven to be better than another. I read somewhere about a country (maybe New Zealand?) that starts all children on their birthday, no matter what time of year the birthday falls, and you're with a peer group of kids that are within 3-6 months for the first year or two of school, eventually integrating to have grade levels spanning a year like we have hear. That sounds so nice to me, but ultimately a pipe dream since that isn't offered here. wink1.gif

 

As for what other families do around here, there's really quite a range. I could probably go either way and know people who have done the same. I know a few parents in her current preschool who are thinking along the same lines as I am for their children, and a few others who are going to send their children along to kindergarten. The preschool itself is entirely nonacademic--they don't even review ABCs, not that it matters much to me as she is already reading, comprehending, adding, etc at home--and I know the director of her preschool is entirely in favor of her remaining, but that's not shocking. Her previous preschool was a Waldorf preschool and they were of the same mind. I do know that the fancy, high end private schools in Atlanta generally don't accept summer birthdays for kindergarten, so if she was going to one of those schools it wouldn't be an issue, but we're not considering those schools. They are beyond unaffordable. We have always planned on public school.

 

Again, my concerns are really long term. I think that she would do well starting "on time," but because of my experience I feel like it might be better to be older in middle and high school. If she wasn't just days away from the cutoff, I would probably send her on without a thought. I have read discussions about this before online. There are always strong opinions, but I'm not sure if I have read a compelling argument from someone who has "redshirted" and regretted it. That's not to say I don't want to read those opinions--if they are out there I want to hear them so I can get a balanced view! I have read quite a few from people who did hold their children back and were happy with the decision, but of course every child and every situation is different. I know for me, I was a pretty mature 5 year old. I was the youngest in my class, but the best reader for the first few years of school. But I was very immature at 17. I graduated at 17 and I was NOT ready for college or adulthood.

 

Thanks again for the advice. I really appreciate it.


I think your very last line sums it up... someone may be mature and developmentally ready at 5 but not developmentally ready at 17.  So I think it would be endlessly frustrating if you looked at this decision of when to start her in school as a life-long decision that can never be undone.

 

Would it make sense for you to hold her back a year and then, if she does get bored/restless and start to act out, then you can push her ahead a year?  If your school will give you that option midway though the year, it might be a win-win -- you'll get to really see how she responds in the classroom and then can make an educated decision rather than just guessing how she'll respond.

 

In either case, I know it's a tough decision and the fact that just a few days one way or the other swings things is really odd.  I, too, like the idea of a 30-day window.  Makes much more sense.

 

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Old 03-16-2011, 10:45 PM
 
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Several random thoughts

 

First, I agree with considering another year of your Reggio school and then enrolling her directly into first grade, if your district allows that. I'd consider that given the fact that she's reading already -- if she continues to improve in her reading this year, she's going to be bored silly in K the next year. I have a child who started reading at about 4. She was reading short chapter books in K, and is now reading at about a 4th grade level in 1st grade. It's hard on her sometimes because even the 'top' reading group only has one child close to her level. She's just not challenged a fair amount of the time. And when she's not challenged, she tends to spend a lot of her energy brooding over social slights or informing other children how they should be doing their work. (Unlike your dd, she's got a late May bday -- so it wasn't not a question of not starting her on time; we put her in a Reggio Kindergarten and transferred her in 1st grade to PS To fix 'her' issues, we'd have to grade skip, and I don't think she's emotionally mature enough for that.)

 

Second, to echo others, you know your daughter best. What's the balance between emotional and intellectual maturity? My sister and BIL waited to start their dd with an October bday (and a November cut-off, I think). For their dd, it was the best decision. She wasn't the most advanced academically, she wasn't that socially mature. So, 'delaying' made perfect sense. She had a really positive school experience, and didn't mind being one of the older kids, even though she hit puberty relatively early.

 

I'd take your parents objections with a grain of salt. They could be feeling defensive because they see your making the opposite decision for your dd as a criticism of their decision for you.

 

Finally, I'd go visit the public school. Talk to the principal. See if you can observe the other children. Find out the routine of the kindergarten day. Ask to have your daughter tested for kindergarten readiness -- and ask them particularly about emotional/social readiness. (Because, to be honest, most 5 year olds aren't that emotionally mature.)


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Old 04-08-2011, 07:00 PM
 
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As was previously alluded to, K is optional in GA and 1st grade is a direct entry grade for anyone who is 6 by Sept 1.

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