Full day kindgergarten or red shirt? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 24 Old 07-23-2011, 06:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello-I'm new here so bear with me! I have 2 May babes-5 and 3. My son was in a Montessori preschool for 2 mornings a week this past year. We had hopes that we could send him full time, but bought a house and have no way to support the 8000/year for 2 children. That said, I always thought I would homeschool, but am finding that I might not have it in me. I stay home except for teaching 3-5 classes a week, so am gone a max of 10 hours a week. My children are both brilliant (of course!) and Noah is more than academically ready for kindergarten, but has always been on the higher need end of the scale. I just found out that our school, which I have heard lovely things about, only offers full time kindergarten and it is making me sick with worry. He had a hard time with 2 mornings until the very end of the school year, and the idea of setting a 5 year old up as an little 8-2 worker is frightening to me. My husband says it will be good for him and that I need to let him grow up, but it seems as if they are growing up too fast if a kindergartener has to be at school all day...Has anyone had any repercussions from keeping their little ones out a year? I know this won't hurt him academically as we do a lot of schooling at home, but I don't want to hurt him socially.
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#2 of 24 Old 07-24-2011, 07:32 PM
 
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I used to have strong feelings about full day kindergarten but now having had three children successfully complete it, I am more flexible about it. When it was my firstborn I had many of the same feelings you have. He did have a little bit of a rough time at first (just tired at the end of the day) but then did quite fine. He had only had partial day preschool or day care before that.

 

My next two children also did just fine. If your child is ready for the academics, generally the adjustment to the full day works out fine. If your child is behind academically, or having a lot of difficulty socially, there could be some justification for waiting or for repeating another year of preschool to get more practice with those skills.


 
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#3 of 24 Old 07-24-2011, 08:54 PM
 
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I would send your child to kindergarten this year unless you have a very compelling reason not to, beyond what you have written in your post.

 

All of us in our house have later birthdays.  I don't see that as a reason by itself to wait.

 

Of course it will be a big adjustment, but he will do fine.

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#4 of 24 Old 07-25-2011, 06:51 AM
 
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I say send him.  BTW, the full day kindergarten where I am does 'kindergarten work' for a couple of hours in the morning, and enrichment/extra activities in the afternoon.  They don't just sit at a desk from 8-2.  The full-day kindergarteners get music, PE, art, and an extra recess.  He'll adjust quickly.  smile.gif



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#5 of 24 Old 07-25-2011, 07:24 AM
 
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Full day kindergarten is much more laid back than most people realize.  When you just do half days, it's mostly just academics.  Full day leaves time for extra recess, PE, music, just time to not do school work. 

 

My son's got a June bday and he'll be going to full day.  I was really worried about it with my oldest, but it ended up being great. 

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#6 of 24 Old 07-25-2011, 08:02 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Alyantavid View Post

Full day kindergarten is much more laid back than most people realize.  When you just do half days, it's mostly just academics.  Full day leaves time for extra recess, PE, music, just time to not do school work. 

 

My son's got a June bday and he'll be going to full day.  I was really worried about it with my oldest, but it ended up being great. 



I agree. I was in a panic when our district changed to full day between my kids but then I found that DS's kindergarten experience was a whole lot more like the kindergarten I remembered. DD's half-day was straight academics. They were hurried and it was a more stressful environment for all. They were taught in a traditional manner reserved for older kids because it was all they had time for. Setting up kinestetic and play-based ways to learn a concept (which is better for in-depth comprehension at this age) takes time. DS went to full-day at the same school and they had 3 recesses, a long lunch, painting, story time, library visits, singing circle, ect. They also had time to do real science which my DS loved. They did their academics in little bursts between and during play which was more appropriate than doing them in long blocks of time. The teachers loved it and had more time to accomodate advanced learners and to help struggling students. DS was 4 when he started and he just loved full-day. Honestly, despite the length, it was a more appropriate learning environment for DS than had he gone to half-day like DD.

 

 

 


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#7 of 24 Old 07-28-2011, 08:22 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yoga mum View Post
 I just found out that our school, which I have heard lovely things about, only offers full time kindergarten and it is making me sick with worry. He had a hard time with 2 mornings until the very end of the school year, and the idea of setting a 5 year old up as an little 8-2 worker is frightening to me. My husband says it will be good for him and that I need to let him grow up, but it seems as if they are growing up too fast if a kindergartener has to be at school all day...Has anyone had any repercussions from keeping their little ones out a year? I know this won't hurt him academically as we do a lot of schooling at home, but I don't want to hurt him socially.

 

As pp have said, Kindergarten is usually a lot of play and "specials" and isn't straight "academics."  Also, full-time school is frequently easier than a couple of days of part-time school adjustment-wise.
 

 


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#8 of 24 Old 07-30-2011, 05:30 AM
 
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Well speaking from redshirting my older son, i felt like he needed another yr to mature. He had never even been inside a school and his tantrums were legendary..it was a mistake. He entered K with a reading level of 2nd grade, he was bored to death with the academics..he liked the social aspect but that was about it. Now heading to 2nd grade his reading level tests out of what they are allowed to test for at his grade level..last guess was about4th or the beggining of 5th..he is not gifted, he just held up his end of the bargain to play pc games that i wouldnt stand there to read to him..bad mommy i know lol

Now my youngest son is slated for K this fall, we have half day here and like the older one he has never set foot in preschool or day care, hes nervous and excited all at the same time but i wont hold him back becaue i know that the best way for him to grow into his own is to start school this yr..we do have friends who are redshirting and having their son go to a prek program..but i wouldnt reccomend it becaue my son knows by his age hes older than most of his classmates and explaining to an 8 yr old why they arent going into 3rd grade is prob the most difficult part of the whole thing

Just my 2 cents

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#9 of 24 Old 08-06-2011, 05:43 AM
 
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I remember thinking the same for my son! After 0 school experience, he ended up loving most of Kindergarten. I was also worried about my daughter this year, but she is loving it so far!

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#10 of 24 Old 08-06-2011, 10:36 AM
 
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I have the same response as most of the posters. With my first, I was really nervous about full day.  had a wonderful experience. Now I'm excited that my daughter will have the same.

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#11 of 24 Old 08-08-2011, 04:51 PM
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I didn't send my oldest to K-- he started school (1st grade) at 6. Honestly, it was more about me than him and I should have let him go. My second started all day K at 4 and loved it. 

I can see red-shirting a kid who is really close to the cut-off or is not ready academically, but if he seems ready, you should send him. 

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#12 of 24 Old 08-08-2011, 08:20 PM
 
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If the only reason you're looking @ holding him out a year is b/c it is full day K, I wouldn't wait.  If there is a reason you otherwise don't think he is ready for K, I'd look at whether it is a big enough issue that it warrants waiting, but for just the one year I'd look @ it this way:

 

- K is one year of a 13 year school experience.

- Do I want to make a decision about my child's entire school career and his placement based on one year?

- Looking at the long term situation, do I think that my child will do best as one of the oldest or one of the youngest?

 

Also, when is the K cut-off where you live?  May doesn't sound like such a late bd that he'll be one of the very youngest.

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#13 of 24 Old 08-09-2011, 03:15 AM
 
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ChristaN makes a great point. It is so hard to bear that in my mind when you are sending your first to school, but so true. The majority of kids do fine with full day.


 
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#14 of 24 Old 08-09-2011, 05:51 AM
 
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We didn't have an option of full day, but in retrospect, I would have taken it if we did.  K, as a half day, is really short.  I have friends who had kids in full day who said that it allowed for a more relaxed feeling.  We often felt that the class was rushed-20 minute "centers", which was actually fairly disruptive-the kids would just get into something, and then they would move on.

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#15 of 24 Old 08-17-2011, 08:05 PM
 
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I agonized last year about sending my June b'day 5 y/o to kindy last year, but we did and it worked out fine. Do I wish he had a Feb birthday? Heck, yeah! But that's more for me. Does your child want to go? Mine did, and was already starting to read so we felt we couldn't hold him back because he'd have been so bored with 2 years of K, y/k?  Full day kinder was challenging to him in a lot of ways, but never in a way he wasn't developmentally ready for or couldn't/didn't deal with. Now me, I freaked out pretty much all year, lol.

 

Our neighbor held back their July boy and had him take 1 year of private k before enrolling him in public k. He complained about boredom all year and is bigger than all the other kids. His parents reasoning is that it will help in high school. OK, but they also held back his sister who is now starting middle school, and she's also bigger than her classmates and frequently mentions how she "should" be in the next grade. So I don't know. But based on what you wrote, I'd send him. You can always pull him if it doesn't work out.

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#16 of 24 Old 08-17-2011, 08:58 PM
 
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We're facing this question right now as well.  Our cut off here is Dec. 31!  My son, with a mid-Nov. birthday makes the cut-off by 6 weeks and we've decided not to send him.  I will admit that the fact that kindergarten is full days was part of the reason.  DS is not ready socially and the stress of being away from home all day, five days a week would we way too much for him.  Kindergarten at four for months, just seems too young.  We're doing a 3 day/week preschool as a transition year.  I'm still struggling with the choice as he's recently gone through a growth spurt and "looks" K-ready.  I'm surprised by what a hard choice this is.


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#17 of 24 Old 08-17-2011, 10:02 PM
 
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Red shirt vote here! My dd was similar, academically ready but high needs and not ready emotionally. We went ahead with full days K while I finished my last year of college, and it was a nightmare for her; she actually regressed academically and was very angry when home.

She left K totally unprepared for public 1st, so we hs'd and have been ever since.

Follow your gut! It willsave you heartache. It may be that he stays home for " K" and at the end of the year is ready for 1st. If you can take another year, why not?

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#18 of 24 Old 08-18-2011, 04:16 PM
 
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This article from the National Association for the Education of Young Children is always a good one to look at as well when considering waiting a year on K: http://journal.naeyc.org/btj/200309/DelayingKEntry.pdf

 

I admit to leaning toward not holding kids out when they are the youngest for a few reasons.  Personally, I was always one of the youngest and both of my girls are as well and it was the right choice in our instances.  From a research standpoint, the idea that the younger children struggle isn't supported.  Also, someone is always going to be the youngest and it creates a harder classroom for teachers to manage when they are dealing with such a wide age range. 

 

Yes, there are classrooms where the age range is unusually large (2 yrs or so), but I generally feel that large age gaps (of more than one year) between the youngest and the oldest students should only occur when one of the children needs to be unusually old or young for grade due to special needs (an extremely advanced student who skipped a grade, for instance, or a child with significant special needs who needed an extra year of school -- although the research on grade retention for children with disabilities or delays isn't nearly as positive as is the research on acceleration of advanced students.)

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#19 of 24 Old 08-22-2011, 03:52 PM
 
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I regret not red shirting my old dd (has a late summer bday). Before entering kindie i did tell the summer pre-k teachers I didn't think she was ready, primarily due to her anxiety and separation issues. But now looking back there were other reasons too that she should have been red shirted that didn't show up til she actually started. 

 

My younger dd will be 6 in December and has done pre-k two years in a row (due to being advanced and unable to start kindergarten early in the state of Florida). She just started a few weeks ago and I was concerned how she would handle full days (8:30am to 4pm) b/c her pre-k was only 3 hours a day. The first few weeks of kindie she complained about the long days but she's doing much better now. She doesn't have any separation issues like my older dd had/has. In fact, the first day of school she didn't want me to walk her to class. 

 

So I think it really depends on the child and only the parents are capable of making the decision b/c you know your child best.

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#20 of 24 Old 08-22-2011, 07:15 PM
 
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Something else to consider is the "other end" of the maturity issue. Will you be comfortable sending your child off to college at 17?  I kept my oldest DS out of kindy until he was 6 and now I am so thankful I did.  He graduated last spring and the amount he matured in that last year was AMAZING.  I am perfectly comfortable sending him to college now.  Last year, not so much.

Just a different perspective to consider.

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#21 of 24 Old 08-23-2011, 06:37 AM
 
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Not to be too pushy here winky.gif, but I did want to say, as a parent who is pretty far into this journey, that not all of us feel that the repercussions become worse later on down the line.  I did hear that from the principal @ the elementary where dds started school -- that the maturity differences, etc. would be greater later and I wouldn't know that yet in K.  My oldest is a freshman in high school, so we are at the point where we're seeing college in the near future.  I will admit that my oldest is somewhat of a special circumstance.  She has both a fall bd & she skipped the last year of elementary so she is not quite 13 yet.  We're looking at her heading off to college at 16 (nearly 17) but it is absolutely the right decision for her socially as much as academically.

 

My youngest has a later fall bd than her sister and is a different kid.  She's not one whose going to be skipping grades, but she still is good as the youngest in grade.  I don't regret starting either of them when we did and I don't see maturity lagging behind their grade peers even as we're into middle and high school.  FWIW, I went off to college just shy of 18 and don't feel that being a year older would have been any benefit for me either.  There are a lot of other things that might have made a big difference in my experience in college, but age isn't likely one of them.

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#22 of 24 Old 08-23-2011, 07:03 AM
 
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Originally Posted by moongazer View Post

Something else to consider is the "other end" of the maturity issue. Will you be comfortable sending your child off to college at 17?  I kept my oldest DS out of kindy until he was 6 and now I am so thankful I did.  He graduated last spring and the amount he matured in that last year was AMAZING.  I am perfectly comfortable sending him to college now.  Last year, not so much.

Just a different perspective to consider.


But the OP's child has a May birthday so he will turn 18 right at the end of his senior year. He won't be going to college as a 17 yo unless he skips a grade.

 

I have three kids, two have May birthdays and one has early June and the school cutoff date is Sept 30. They all started at 5 and are now 2nd, 6th and 8th grade and all doing fine in school. I really can't imagine them being in the younger grade. I guess maybe it is different if the district has an early cut off (like June 1) but with a Sept 30 cutoff, I can't see holding back a May child. Esp. one who is academically ready, which it sounds like OP's child is. He will likely be pretty far ahead of his classmates if he is held back a year.

 

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#23 of 24 Old 08-23-2011, 07:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChristaN View Post

Not to be too pushy here winky.gif, but I did want to say, as a parent who is pretty far into this journey, that not all of us feel that the repercussions become worse later on down the line. 
.


I agree. It's so individual. My eldest is 14 and going into her sophomore year at high school. My 10-year-old is heading into middle school. Both are slated to start college at 17 unless they choose to finish high school earlier. Even being the youngest, they still have most in common with the older and more mature peers of their grade (and mature as in most focused/responsible/high self-control, not "mature" as in lost in pop culture and doing things innapropriate for their age like most people seem to guage maturity.) Being in the younger grade would be a real mistake them.

 

I have to add that in our area, red-shirting has risen to ridiculous levels and the district is having so many problems because of it. "Grade corrections" are becoming popular in middle school when it's obvious to all that these 6th graders with facial hair and bored out of their mind shouldn't be there. It's not an easy transition at that point.

 

I will maintain that red-shirting is good for a very small population. Holding back a May baby so they will be 19 before they graduate high school is extreme and unneccessary.


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#24 of 24 Old 08-23-2011, 08:46 AM
 
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I have to add that in our area, red-shirting has risen to ridiculous levels and the district is having so many problems because of it. "Grade corrections" are becoming popular in middle school when it's obvious to all that these 6th graders with facial hair and bored out of their mind shouldn't be there. It's not an easy transition at that point.

 

There was a kid in my son's 5th grade class last year who had a mustache. Although he had to repeat a grade so he was older than the other kids OK, I don't know what my point is other than I was surprised to see a 5th grader with a mustache. Carry on! biggrinbounce.gif
 

 

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