help with Grade K Boyfriend /Girlfriend Issues??? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 03-09-2012, 07:48 AM - Thread Starter
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okay my kids go to a Catholic school and lately my youngest who is in Kinder has been telling me that his friends have girlfrinds and boyfrinds and they kiss each other......NOW i am sorry but i just do NOT agree with this behavior and encouraging this in school so i went to the principal and he was very supportive i have a meeting with the teacher and him on monday to come up with idea's as to hop to solve the problem.....Any suggestions ???? I have tried to google lesson plans but nothing and any info still nothing ?????   Help please!!!!???

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#2 of 6 Old 03-09-2012, 11:18 AM
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First, you need to realize that this behavior is very typical for kids this age. Kissing each other doesn't mean the same kind of romantic ties for a 6 year old that it does for a teen or an adult. It's usually playing glorified 'house'. In addition, I bet there's a lot more talk about kissing than ever actually happened. 6 year olds aren't the most reliable reporters, remember.


When ds was in K, his teachers warned us that this behavior might pop up, and they talked about how they would deal with it. They didn't want us to be freaked out. I also have vivid memories of first grade where my friends and I would chase the boys around the playground so we could kiss them. I'm not sure we ever caught them, mind you!


I would first and foremost ask for closer supervision at recess time, when I assume this is happening. Well supervised kids have a harder time getting away with this. I'd then ask the teacher to have a talk with all the kids about keeping their bodies to themselves. That includes hitting, poking, tickling and yes, kissing. None of that is appropriate behavior at school.


What I would not do is shame the kids into thinking that kissing is bad. It's not bad, it's just not appropriate for this time or place.

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#3 of 6 Old 03-09-2012, 11:35 AM
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I'll just second everything Lynn said. Increasing supervision at recess should really help. 

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#4 of 6 Old 03-11-2012, 04:36 PM
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My dd's teacher has sent home letters a few months apart about kissing (and other keep-your-hands-to-yourself behavior) occurring, asking us to discuss with our children what is appropriate behavior in school (I don't have the letter anymore so I don't remember the wording). Dd was initially the "overly affectionate with everyone child" and the teacher spoke to me about it (and mentioned there was one or two every year), so I assume she did with other parents as well.


Our school seems to handle it as a "violation" of the school handbook/behavior code and the parents deal with the boyfriends/girlfriends angle.

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#5 of 6 Old 03-12-2012, 09:28 AM - Thread Starter
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thank you for your responses ..although i know it is a normal thing for all kids to go though and i am NOT a prude!!!  i feel it's a bit out of controle ..with the children and the parents encouraging it!!!!   and so the teacher says that they have been spoken too i feel mabe that they have not gotten it so it has been suggested that a note go home to the parents asking us (as parents NOT) to support this kind of behavior and that it's an ongoing issue that the teacher need support with...I think that is fair!!!  Being a teacher myself i think that is a good way to approch it!!!   Better supporvision out side yeah that could work too and it was also brought up!!!!  Now a days children know way to much and we need to encourage the inocennce of them......When i was a kid it WAS cute but today!!!! 



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#6 of 6 Old 03-14-2012, 06:21 AM
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I think a talk about why we kiss and what it means, and where its appropriate is the best bet, and I agree with the increased supervision too


However, I dont think making a big deal of it will help the problem, it is completely natural and part of the stages of development to be curious and notice differences, kissing is the same. I had "boyfriends" in kindergarden, and played kissing tag.


I think as a parent, or anyone its a bit disturbing? i guess you could say because they are sooo young yet mimicing adolescent/adult behaviour. Your concern is valid for sure, but I would keep a minor hands off on this. 


I agree about the shame, that's not right either, it will become the forbidden fruit


kissing is ok but you need to state the perimeters of why and whom with

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