Halloween party at school and you don't celebrate Halloween. What do you do? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 9 Old 10-16-2013, 03:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This is kind of a follow up to my holiday parties thread. I'm wondering if there are parents here who don't let their kids participate in a Halloween party at school, and what your kids do during that time, and if you do something else special with your kids?

I saw a mom one year drop off a bag of stuff for her kids to play with during a Halloween party. Like DS game systems - not new but stuff from home for them to use during the party.
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#2 of 9 Old 10-16-2013, 05:40 PM
 
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Well, we do celebrate Halloween, but other holidays that we do not celebrate I still have everyone go, depending on circumstances, of course. I figure if the person is close enough to think of us then we can celebrate with them.


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#3 of 9 Old 10-17-2013, 10:23 PM
 
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I was not allowed to participate in any school holiday activities or birthdays growing up. And I felt sad and embarassed if I had to attend school on special days because I had to sit out and watch the festivities.

When I was older (Grade 4), my teachers allowed me to sit in the classroom by myself or go to the library. If your child doesn't mind, maybe that is an option, or perhaps your child could stay home that day if possible.

I didn't read your other holiday post yet, so I'm not sure your beliefs, but maybe a Harvest celebration, or Fall celebration would be fun. You could even have healthy treats using fall fruit, like apples or pumpkin.

Anything special you do with your children will be fun! I wish my parents had done other special activities with me. smile.gif

belly.gifMama to a Little Scientist (09/08) and our Ray of Sunshine (05/11).
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#4 of 9 Old 10-19-2013, 04:05 PM
 
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Mi Amor I have heard these sentiments from so many children that were not allowed to participate. I have concluded that for my family it would make sense to just keep my child home from school if there was something fun going on that I didn't agree with. This hasn't ever happened to us, we're pretty flexible about things, but if something came up, I don't think I"d make my child sit through the embarrassment, such as you describe. Thanks for sharing the child's view. 


 
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#5 of 9 Old 10-19-2013, 06:02 PM
 
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My kids have never celebrated holidays and rather than being sad or embarrassed, they have been excited for the opportunity to explain to their teachers and classmates their reasons for not celebrating.

 

We've done all sorts of things...sometimes I kept them home, sometimes all the non-celebrators would gather together in the library to play games.  At this point, I have one already done with school and the younger is in a holistic school that doesn't "do" parties because it's too hard to control the food brought in from home.


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#6 of 9 Old 10-22-2013, 09:52 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blessedwithboys View Post
 

My kids have never celebrated holidays and rather than being sad or embarrassed, they have been excited for the opportunity to explain to their teachers and classmates their reasons for not celebrating.

 

We've done all sorts of things...sometimes I kept them home, sometimes all the non-celebrators would gather together in the library to play games.  At this point, I have one already done with school and the younger is in a holistic school that doesn't "do" parties because it's too hard to control the food brought in from home.


It's interesting that you think your kids are excited to explain why they don't get to celebrate holidays.  And the reason for why they don't celebrate holidays?

 

I wasn't allowed to celebrate any holiday when I was kid either.  I had to go sit in the library.  I certainly was never "excited" for the opportunity to explain why I didn't get to celebrate holidays like everyone else.  In fact, I dreaded being asked about it.  But then again, I wasn't allowed any say in the matter.

 

OP, you could let your child stay home for the day, but I don't know how much good that will do.  The parties usually don't take up the whole day, so your child will probably still have work to make up, and your child will still hear from the other kids the next day how much fun they had at the party and will still feel left out.  Usually the non-celebrating kids just go the library while the party is going on.

 

This is one area where I think parents should allow their children to decide for themselves what they want to do.


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#7 of 9 Old 10-22-2013, 11:45 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My kids do celebrate but I always feel bad for the kids who can't. The ones who couldn't the year there were 5 weren't Jehovah's Witnesses, they were fundamentalist Christians. I'd just rather see a party that celebrates fall or the harvest or something instead of Halloween so more kids could be involved, but you're right that some won't be able to participate regardless of what the party is called.
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#8 of 9 Old 11-01-2013, 07:57 PM
 
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We had our parties at school yesterday and I thought about this thread. The school where I work has a lot of recent immigrants. Most of them seemed a bit confused because Halloween isn't part of their culture or traditions. I thought about how "not celebrating a holiday" is really different from "being opposed to a holiday".  Our kids who have families who don't celebrate Halloween were a part of everything and learned more about our strange American culture. Teachers who work mostly with English language learners brought alternate easy customs so that their students who didn't bring anything could participate.  Who knows -- may be in a year or two, some of those kids will be convincing their parents to buy them ninja costumes!

 

One of the good things about school holiday parties is that they allow recent immigrants to become more assimilated into our culture.


but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#9 of 9 Old 11-03-2013, 12:47 PM
 
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Thanks Lauren! I was a pretty shy child, so I certainly didn't share my feelings with my parents. I hope if I had, they would have allowed me to stay home on certain days. smile.gif

belly.gifMama to a Little Scientist (09/08) and our Ray of Sunshine (05/11).
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