Mothering Forum banner

Opting out of homework in the early years?

3K views 21 replies 9 participants last post by  blessedwithboys 
#1 ·
Were busy, both my kids are special needs, I'm juggling roughly 43 hours a week of therapy M-F between the 3 of us (and trying to work nights!) and that doesn't count my hour of physical therapy daily. For mine and my 14yo's sanity I had to put my 8yo 2nd grader into public school again this year, thats ok, she went last year and LOVED it. She's loving this year too and it gives us a break and I can focus on other stuff. One of the big issues is homework, I'm not talking about work that reinforces whats going on in the class. I'm talking busy work thats Kindy/early 1st grade level work sheets. I questioned the teacher on it as I was concerned on the level of education they were providing and was informed the teachers are told to give really easy, below grade level stuff just to get them in the habit of doing homework in the upper grades.

I am so not ok with this! She comes home from school bouncing off the walls and doesn't calm down until bedtime. She plays hard from the time she gets home until bedtime unless she has therapy which is 3 days a week after school in which we don't even get home until about 5:30 then I have to make dinner then we start our bedtime routine at 7pm. She's actually getting very little play time.

dd8 is getting upset that the teacher is giving her 0's and its effecting her grade and she's had recess taken away too. This is ridiculous! I don't have time/energy to deal with fighting her to do busy work and I don't even believe in homework until the teen years. How do I politely tell the teacher we don't do busy work for the sake of busy work? This kid has no issues academically beyond being a couple months behind in reading which I'm ok with, she's a late reader and making steady progress. An hour and a half of homework in 2nd grade is crazy.
 
See less See more
#2 ·
How do I politely tell the teacher we don't do busy work for the sake of busy work?
I would explain about the structure and responsibility involved in your family's various therapy commitments and make a case for that being ample training for the structure and responsibility that will be required for homework in the teen years. Ask "How much homework per week do you think is necessary to prepare a 2nd grader for homework in the later years?" You'll probably get an answer like "3-and-a-half hours, plus independent reading." At that point you explain that your family is juggling 43 hours of therapy, ___ hours of which directly involve your dd. (If she has exercises to do at home related to her therapy, mention that component too, since that's a direct correlate of homework.) Explain that since she has therapy three days a week, you'd like her therapy to "count" as homework on those days. You'll send her homework sheets back with a note to that effect on therapy days. Otherwise, on no-therapy nights, she could do homework, but you would like an agreement on a time-limit, whatever the teacher thinks is reasonable.

Miranda
 
#3 ·
If it's easy busy work that can be done independently you probably can't make much of a case. You may be able to make a case for it by telling the teacher about the extenuating circumstances that make it impossible for homework to get done or by telling her you are refusing homework for her. Some people on here have had luck doing that. At the school I teach at and the ones my dd attended the response would be that it can be done at recess or during the time that is set aside for art or free choice unless there was a really good reason it can't get done at home. Even with a good excuse a child who is behind academically would be pulled in at recess and during specials to get that work done.

When my dd was younger I just accepted poor grades for busy work homework but did make her do classwork that was sent home to complete.
 
This post has been deleted
#8 ·
Good thought, she is making sufficient progress. They make a big deal about homework here, I've been getting irritated the past 2 weeks because her behavioral intervention person has decided to make dd do her homework during therapy time after school since we haven't been doing it at home. I'd rather they focus on her behavioral issues that cause so much strife in the house then wasting it on pointless "homework".

It is very reasonable for kids with extensive outside therapy to have reduced to no homework. Special education teachers tend to understand this.
It isn't all her, her therapy hours outside the home is only about 4 hours a week after school (not counting travel time), I've also got my stuff going on with myself (5 hours outside the home therapy and I have a teen with Autism who is receiving roughly 30 hours a week of services (no, thats not a typo and its the level of support she needs) and I have to be available to the therapists and half that time I have to be with them (she has a lot of issues and only got dx'd this year since I couldn't afford testing in our old state, she has done wonderfully this year with all these supports) so its not so much her therapy schedule alone but ours as a family. Call me lazy but I don't have time for busy work between therapy, schooling my teen, cooking from scratch (gluten/dairy free with multiple food allergies) and its just one more stress I don't need since getting her to do it involves a whole lot of drama and upsetting the whole family. Its the #2 reason I enrolled her in school, I was tired of fighting her to do her work.

If it's easy busy work that can be done independently you probably can't make much of a case. You may be able to make a case for it by telling the teacher about the extenuating circumstances that make it impossible for homework to get done or by telling her you are refusing homework for her. Some people on here have had luck doing that. At the school I teach at and the ones my dd attended the response would be that it can be done at recess or during the time that is set aside for art or free choice unless there was a really good reason it can't get done at home. Even with a good excuse a child who is behind academically would be pulled in at recess and during specials to get that work done.

When my dd was younger I just accepted poor grades for busy work homework but did make her do classwork that was sent home to complete.
She wont do it independently, there is pretty much never a good reason to take recess away from a child imo, thats just asking for poor behavior. If they need extra help then do it during a less needed class or after school. Last year at her old school they had an after school program just for that that gave 45 minutes of tutoring time then an hour or so of just plain fun time then the bus brought them home. Kinda sucks that this school doesn't have an afterschool program like our old school did.
 
#4 ·
Since your DD has special needs, does she have an IEP or a 504? I'd approach it from that side so that you don't have to deal with this again next year. I would write a letter (real letter - date and signature) requesting that an addendum to added to her IEP or 504 to excuse her from homework with no negative consequences, and I would mail it to her special education advocate at school with a copy to her teacher and to the principal.


It is very reasonable for kids with extensive outside therapy to have reduced to no homework. Special education teachers tend to understand this.
 
#5 ·
Since your DD has special needs, does she have an IEP or a 504? I'd approach it from that side so that you don't have to deal with this again next year. I would write a letter (real letter - date and signature) requesting that an addendum to added to her IEP or 504 to excuse her from homework with no negative consequences, and I would mail it to her special education advocate at school with a copy to her teacher and to the principal.

It is very reasonable for kids with extensive outside therapy to have reduced to no homework. Special education teachers tend to understand this.
Yes, this. Exactly what I was going to suggest.
 
#7 ·
You can approach them with their own 'system' to get what you need for your daughter. From an RTI website, highlights mine:

Tier 2: Targeted Interventions
Students not making adequate progress in the regular classroom in Tier 1 are provided with increasingly intensive instruction matched to their needs on the basis of levels of performance and rates of progress. Intensity varies across group size, frequency and duration of intervention, and level of training of the professionals providing instruction or intervention. These services and interventions are provided in small-group settings in addition to instruction in the general curriculum. In the early grades (kindergarten through 3rd grade), interventions are usually in the areas of reading and math. A longer period of time may be required for this tier, but it should generally not exceed a grading period. Students who continue to show too little progress at this level of intervention are then considered for more intensive interventions as part of Tier 3

http://www.rtinetwork.org/learn/what/whatisrti

I think it is time for them to move to the next tier!
 
#9 ·
She is getting T2 for reading, 45 minutes every morning because OMG! She's 4 months behind where we think she should be.:eyesroll I'm just not sure where OT would come in, all I want is for her to get the heavy work, she's refusing to do writing assignments or starts them sloppily then refuses to finish. She had a stroke and has lingering effects, she tires easily, especially when fine motor is involved.
 
#10 ·
I'd continue to push for the 504. Document EVERYTHING. If you haven't already, start a file and date every phone conversation, make a copy of every email, note every time she is *punished* in any way for things related to her disability, which at this point, includes all punishments. Because she is making "sufficient academic progress," you need to prove that the current plan isn't working because it is treating behaviors related to her disability as disciplinary issues.


A child with sensory issues and in PT should NEVER be denied recess for any reason, or kept back from ANY physical activity. What is she missing when she's in RTI? Please tell me that she isn't missing things like PE.


Also check your state laws on recess. Some states do have laws that mandate a minimum amount of recess for all children, and some schools in those states like to pretend those laws don't count.


Since she has OT issues, it most likely takes her a longer time to complete all written assignments than her peers. Do they have a target amount of time that homework is supposed to take for her grade? Some schools do, and asking to have her homework modified to take that amount of time for her, even though it will be fewer number of pages or problems, might be a middle ground.


Would it be possible for her to do any of her homework while her sibling is in therapy?


I'm sorry her school is being a big butt head. Hopefully, the principal will be helpful this week.
 
#16 ·
I'd continue to push for the 504. Document EVERYTHING. If you haven't already, start a file and date every phone conversation, make a copy of every email, note every time she is *punished* in any way for things related to her disability, which at this point, includes all punishments. Because she is making "sufficient academic progress," you need to prove that the current plan isn't working because it is treating behaviors related to her disability as disciplinary issues.

Thank you, your making me see things in a different way, I only know the writing thing is a sensory issue because the OT focused on it and made a point to show me the difference in her writing and ability to sit still after that heavy work, I got tired just watching her run around the therapy room lol


A child with sensory issues and in PT should NEVER be denied recess for any reason, or kept back from ANY physical activity. What is she missing when she's in RTI? Please tell me that she isn't missing things like PE.

PE? You mean that thing they do once a week for an hour? Yes, seriously, they rotate things like PE, Art, Library and I dont know what else on a weekly basis. She has no idea what she's missing while at reading but its literally the first thing in the morning so I'm guessing its not PE.


Also check your state laws on recess. Some states do have laws that mandate a minimum amount of recess for all children, and some schools in those states like to pretend those laws don't count.

No recess requirements in this state:(

Since she has OT issues, it most likely takes her a longer time to complete all written assignments than her peers. Do they have a target amount of time that homework is supposed to take for her grade? Some schools do, and asking to have her homework modified to take that amount of time for her, even though it will be fewer number of pages or problems, might be a middle ground.

I have no idea how long it should take, I just know it involves a whole lot of yelling, arguing and punishments to get her to do it and I'm so not ok with that.

Would it be possible for her to do any of her homework while her sibling is in therapy?

Tried that for months and it was a no go, I couldn't get her to do her work when her sister was out with therapists either. She used to be an easy mellow child until about 2 years ago when she decided she LOVED getting reactions out of people. This was the kid that you could talk to for discipline, she could see others POV and was very concerned about how her behavior impacted others feelings. I miss that kid:( Anyway, this was another reason I ended up putting her in school, I felt she wasn't learning enough at home and she was getting bored and acting out at her sisters therapy appts.

I'm sorry her school is being a big butt head. Hopefully, the principal will be helpful this week.

I'm not holding my breath, he reminds me of a politician.
As far as letter grades, I would be totally fine with my kid getting a zero on homework if they didn't do the homework. However, they should never, ever loose recess. This is really a different issue.

Exactly, I don't care if she gets zeros specifically for homework, I do care if they take away recess.

Letter grades for kids who have disabilities and accommodations for those disabilities is a huge topic, but one that as long as the child is progressing from grade to grade, I honestly don't think matters. For my child with disabilities and accommodations (which included less work) as long as her letter grade was at least a C-, I didn't complain, even if she completely knew the material. Because the secret that everyone knows but likes to pretend isn't true is that letter grades mean less than nothing until high school.

I think I'd have a heart attack if my child brought home a C- lol, Her report card says next years grade level will be 3 so I dont think she's in danger of failing over this although I was surprised to see it on a mid year report card. I do have to disagree that grades dont matter until high school, at least in this state. Here it starts mattering in 6th, you don't pass all your classes each year you get held back. We ran into that this year, last year in 7th all heck broke lose over winter as usual and we had to stop school (this is a regular and known event with my older so I run an inverted school year), we use a K12 VA for my older ASD kid, I like the curriculum and I need the accountability. Normally I can pull her then she's well enough by the end of Feb I can re- enroll her and we pick up where we left off and work though the summer. I did not anticipate that they close enrollment here in Jan (we moved states between 6-7th) when dd is at her worst so not only did we miss getting back into the program she had her worst year ever and come the new school year was not ready for 8th and the school was demanding a report card, a list of curriculum used and dd had to test into her classes. I ended up having to get the school social worker involved and the principal but in the end they basically failed her for 7th and enrolled her in 7th again because of state law credit requirements.

They also put her in an alternative education pilot program and gave us an IEP that had my jaw dropping. We just finished our 1st semester in the program and I've already asked if she can be in it next year too lol. She's a 14yo 7th grader and this semester earned 3 of the 60 credits she needs to graduate high school, I was very, very nervous about her earning HS credit in 7th, especially when she's been a struggling student and these are difficult classes (pre-algebra and Lang Arts). Her issues are not so much academic but behavioral and this was going on her HS transcript under electives. She managed a 3.0GPA this semester for that transcript so not only is she getting 7th grade credit but high school credit as well. Anyway, here if you don't pass all your classes starting in 6th you don't get into the next grade period so yes grades matter.

btw, that IEP? Without a real fight I got full time IBI support for all school hours at home (this was the only thing I was asking for because school is very difficult and she's totally non functional in a classroom so home is her only option and it was a nightmare), OT, math tutoring, reduced work so she's only doing 3 classes at a time with the 4th being more a gravy thing if we had time. I got every testing accommodation I wanted including her being required to answer verbally on state testing because she won't read the dang thing and just plays fill in the bubble to get out of there early and here those tests effect what classes you get next year. They bent over backwards and offered more then I wanted. I have disliked HS'ing her since the beginning but it was our only option, but once we got that magic report in our hands showing Autism and a few other issues last year it was like a magic pass and so many doors have opened up. I pray we can keep the IBI until she graduates lol, makes my life soooo much easier! The daily 9am class connects help too, gets her in a school state of mind and its the teacher telling her to do xyz and not me:)

hmm.. if I had IBI school support for my 8yo I'd consider bringing her back home, nah, probably not. Part of the reason she's in school is I needed the quiet to start doing the WAHM thing to bring in some income since working nights kills me and I can't handle the constant noise and interaction demands. She DEMANDS to be the center of attention 100% of the time and ups the ante until she's got it, its not healthy for any of us and just leaves us frustrated and angry at the constant demands for our time and attention, high needs infants are less demanding. It takes a lot to admit when you need to physically remove your child for everyone's sanity and the child in questions safety because she pushes and pushes and my ASD child will hit or kick her when pushed to far:(
Yes she's in counseling and yes she's in a behavior mod program but I have yet to see any benefit. I'm hoping to get lab work done next month and consult with a specialist to deal with her methylation issues which maybe driving the need to push, push, push, go, go, go on top of the sensory issues.
Mine is in color:)
 
#11 ·
You can formally request testing in writing and they have 60 days to comply. You can also bring in her diagnosis parerwork from the doctor to force a 504. RTI is a process for confirming or ruling out a diagnosable disorder. For children who are basically doing ok academically and only have behavior issues waiting for the RTI process to begin is a waste of time unless behavior issues are extreme. Some misbehavior is normal and treated as an issue to correct following the discipline plan in place for most minor issues.

There are really no less needed classes for kids because that is the teacher's prep time and some states have standards kids need to meet during these times. Where I teach we have regular meetinga during this time so it isn't even an option. Recess is a time when a homework club can be run easily for kids from many grade levels without a lot of extra cost due to bussing and hiring extra staff so kids do just often miss recess if they aren't willing or able to do homework at home or schoolwork in class. I agree that taking recess isn't a good idea, I've unsuccessfully argued against it for my dd when she was younger, but it is often the only one that is workable and academics come first at school.

You mentioned that your dd's teacher said they were told to give easu homework to build the habit of completing it. It sounds like your dd's teacher is getting some of these requirements for homework completion placed on her from the administration. You really have to have a legally binding document on place to get around this.
 
#12 ·
To be honest, I think that by accepting public education you are accepting that your child will not be educated exactly the way you want. I would maybe discuss with the teacher what they feel is an appropriate amount of time to spend on homework. I've found that ten minutes per grade is reasonable but everyone has opinions on it. I'd say that the amount of time spent on homework will be that amount and whatever is not complete will just not be done. I'd also accept that there are consequences for not doing assigned work. Skipping recess is not right but yeah, lower grades make sense if for no reason besides it just doesn't make sense for a teacher to give kids who do more work the same grades as those who do less work.
 
#15 ·
To be honest, I think that by accepting public education you are accepting that your child will not be educated exactly the way you want. .
There are numerous laws in place to protect students with disabilities. Based on the OP's comments, I believe her school is out of compliance with multiple aspects of IDEA, which is federal law.

They would also be out of compliance with state laws in my state, however, her state may have different laws.

As far as letter grades, I would be totally fine with my kid getting a zero on homework if they didn't do the homework. However, they should never, ever loose recess. This is really a different issue.

Letter grades for kids who have disabilities and accommodations for those disabilities is a huge topic, but one that as long as the child is progressing from grade to grade, I honestly don't think matters. For my child with disabilities and accommodations (which included less work) as long as her letter grade was at least a C-, I didn't complain, even if she completely knew the material. Because the secret that everyone knows but likes to pretend isn't true is that letter grades mean less than nothing until high school.
 
#13 ·
You can search for all the posts I've made on this subject over the years, but basically what we did was politely inform the school that we were opting out of any and all homework and that loss of recess and any and all other consequences were completely unacceptable.

It sounds jerky and entitled. So what? I was sweet as pie when I said it. Every teacher balked at first, but I stayed firm and eventually they realized it was less work for them.

If ds ever struggled with anything, we worked on it at home for a day or two. But he never did homework all through elementary school and still managed all As and Bs.
 
#14 ·
But he never did homework all through elementary school and still managed all As and Bs.
But then, let me guess, because he didn't do practice-homework for the better part of a decade, when he got to high school he had no idea how to work independently, how to be responsible with homework and studying, how to keep track of deadlines, or how to create a relaxed and productive environment at home in which to do work, and as a result he started doing drugs and dropped out after 10th grade, lives on a couch in your rec room in the basement and has a pregnant girlfriend?

:rotflmao

Miranda ... who applauds your approach
 
#17 ·
My son is in First Grade and as soon as homework became a struggle in our home we stopped doing it and I told the teacher he wasn't going to do it and that it's more important that he play after being in school for six hours. There is not evidence to support homework in the younger grades.
 
#18 ·
I did have a chat with her teacher and she agreed with me so no homework issues anymore. The school even started doing the heavy work she needed and this past quarter report card had all glowing things to say. Teacher admitted they can see a real difference after the heavy work:) Got her methylation issues under control too so she's much calmer these days:)
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top