Playschool or not? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 9 Old 09-03-2004, 10:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Although I've been eavesdropping for a couple of years (and thank you all for your help), I've only just registered, so please forgive if I don't do this right!

I stay at home with my very soon-to-be 3 year old son, and I wanted to get some thoughts on playschool. I decided a couple months ago to delay sending him to playschool, but I've recently been having second thoughts. I wonder if I'm keeping him from something that he will really benefit from.

My main reasons for not sending him were:
  • I'm able to be with him.
  • I take him to music classes, swimming lessons, and library storytimes.
  • He goes once a week to a trusted caregiver where he can play with 3 or 4 friends.
  • He wasn't potty-trained at the time of registration...he is now...yay!


I've read different things about expecting too much at too young an age, and was completely comfortable with my decision a few weeks ago. I've run into some moms who think he must be bored, he's going to get left behind, etc., which is making me question myself. So I guess I'm wondering what benefits you've found with playschool, and can I provide the same (or better) experience myself? He's a very smart little boy, and I'm sure he would do quite well, but would the benefits be greater for him just to spend another year hanging out with mom?
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#2 of 9 Old 09-04-2004, 12:48 AM
 
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First, WELCOME!!!

Secondly, I wasn't sure you were aware, but this is the "Special Needs Parenting" section. If you didn't mean to post *here* you might consider:

The Childhood Years
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...splay.php?f=65
or
Learning at School
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...splay.php?f=51

This is a great place, hope you enjoy it!

Kay

 

 

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#3 of 9 Old 09-04-2004, 11:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Don't know how I did it; don't know how to fix it; I'm just a mess!
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#4 of 9 Old 09-04-2004, 10:48 PM
 
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Hi there! I moved the thread to Learning at School, where I think you will get some good responses.

Lauren

 
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#5 of 9 Old 09-04-2004, 11:01 PM
 
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Thanks Lauren!!!

Trac---it sounds like he has a lot of activities for a three year old, IMO, if you don't *want* to send him I think there is no problem w/forgoing it. DS just turned three (8/31) and is starting gymnastics in a couple weeks, we go to the library & stuff with his big sis and that's it. I'm not worried at all With DD, DS was a newborn at that age and she definately didn't have that much to do and she DEFINATELY didn't get "left behind" LOL. Even the AAP says there is not a need for activities outside of family based ones at this age.

For me, it would come down to, "What do I hope to gain from this experience?" It sounds like there is nothing specific you feel DS needs (and he already has a couple classes, times to play with friends, etc...) so "why?" I also don't think it would be bad (if DS wants to go), just not necessary.

Welcome, again, though

 

 

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#6 of 9 Old 09-05-2004, 08:55 AM
 
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One of the main reasons people send their kids to school, at least here in the states, is for "kindergarten readiness." This includes not just learning their ABCs and pre-math concepts, but learning how to sit in a circle time, how to wait their turn, etc. That can be valuable, depending on the schooling you'll be using for ds by age 5 and up. But your ds could easily learn these things when he is 4, in that year prior to k-garten. It does sound like he has lots of good activities already in place for this year! (plus it will give him extra time to really get confident with the toileting).

 
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#7 of 9 Old 09-05-2004, 04:12 PM
 
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You are doing fine. Personally, I think that age 3 is too young for preschool. They have a hard time at that age in large groups and they need their moms. Preschool kids are supposed to be able to toilet and wash hands by themselves and I think they need help to do it properly at age 3. Can you tell I'm a real hygiene freak? They get sick a lot in preschool because of this. Think of what is better for your son, 1:1 care with a loving mom or 1:8 or 10 with a paid worker? I believe that a part time school for 1 yr at age 4 can be beneficial but isn't necessary. I felt the same way you did at age 3, it seemed to be the age all of my ds' friends were sent to preschool. Mostly I think the moms did it because they were pg or had a younger sib who needed more time or because they wanted to go back to work. WE did attend a parent-participation preschool at age 3 where a licensed teacher taught us how to teach/interact with our own child. I consider that to be a valuable experience for both of us plus a nice way to meet new friends.
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#8 of 9 Old 09-06-2004, 05:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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First of all, thanks Lauren for re-directing me to the right forum.

I'm feeling much better about not enrolling DS in playschool this year. I'm going to see if I can find some guidance from a teacher, as you mentioned, Siddie. Just to make sure he's got the necessary skills when he does go. You're right about it being a different thing if you're PG or working, or whatever, and I think in our situation, this will work out just fine. By taking him to the classes we do go to, I'm providing him with some enriching experiences, and at the same time he's learning to play w/others, share, etc. Whew, I was starting to feel a bit "overprotective" there. But, yeah, I can do this, and it's the right thing for us! Thanks all!
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#9 of 9 Old 09-06-2004, 11:19 PM
 
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my 4yr dd didn't seem to gain that much from her "school" last year. She's an only and doesn't have that many friends. The only thing I really noticed is how she improved socially (sharing and standing in line stuff) but of course that does improve with age. As long as your child has some social activites (friends or family) I wouldn't worry. You can ask to tour the kindergarden you plan on sending your son to and asking the teachers what they expect the children to know.

mom to 14yr dd and 4yr dd
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