school is not nurturing or caring at all - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 11:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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when we signed my son up to his nursery school we were told it was a caring and nurturing environment, i am starting to think the lied.

a little while ago the children were allowed to take in a small amount of money to buy a cake at break time, we did not know about it so oliver had no money. so what did the teacher do, buy him a cake knowing we would happily repay her? remind us when dropping him off that he needs money? no, he came home and cried because he was the only child who didnt get to buy a cake.

yesterday all the other children left school with a jelly they had made the day before, all the children attend tuesday mornings except him, we have had troube with the school about this who believes he ought to be attending 5 mornings, i dont. so they all had jelly and he was the only one left out, it would have been so easy for the teacher, when she was making the jelly (sorry jello to you guys) to pour out 1 extra bowl for the only child who wasnt there.

but no, to rpove a point that we are not being fair and making him miss out on things they do not make a small extra effort to make a little boy happy.

it is starting to make me really angry. i feel like he is being bullied by the teachers because dh and i will not be dicateted to about what is best for our son

what should we do
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#2 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 07:38 PM
 
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I have always believed that if you have any doubts whatsoever about your child's school, the child should not be in that school.

Are there any other preschools in the area? Can you stay at home with him, and maybe start a playgroup with other moms?

They definitely should not be singling him out...
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#3 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 07:42 PM
 
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I am sorry...that sounds awful. I would look for another school, but withdraw for now. That teacher sounds mean and controlling.

~Joan, Happy mom to 2 beautiful kiddos, one new puppy and 2 lovely felines
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#4 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 09:41 PM
 
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That nursery school sound awful
I homeschool and work part time at a preschool in the afternoon- this kind of behavior would never be allowed in our school. We have some children attend 5 days and other only 3 days but we ALWAYS make sure that we have enough of everything for everyone.
I also would never have a child stand there and watch other children eat a treat - that is just plain MEAN

My son would not want my son in that kind of enviroment.
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#5 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 09:46 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom4tot
I am sorry...that sounds awful. I would look for another school, but withdraw for now. That teacher sounds mean and controlling.



ditto
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#6 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 09:47 PM
 
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I wouldnt hesitate to pull my child out of that environment. Those first impressions of school are so important. I would hate for your dc to hate school because he was in a crummy enviroment at the beginning Poor little guy. I would go in for a meeting with the teacher and the preschool director and complain about his treatment. to you and your ds.
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#7 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 09:47 PM
 
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I feel sad about your little one,that was cruel wat they did.
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#8 of 12 Old 03-17-2005, 10:04 PM
 
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You should HOMESCHOOL! My son was refused water, bathroom breaks, and forced to stand in the hot sun during June as punishment in public school. I looked into private schools but they were all too religious and they still have issues. We homeschool. I love it and so does he. it has truly been the best thing for our family. I wish I would have started from the beginning.
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#9 of 12 Old 03-18-2005, 11:58 PM
 
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I started my 3 1/2 DD in a pre-school to socialize and for *fun*. It wasn't as bad as yours, but they were by no means nurturing. AT ALL!!! I pulled her out after 4-5 days and kept her home. We signed her up for gymnastics shortly after instead and she LOVED it!! Made a friend who went to a very warm pre-school. Took her there and she is a totally different child. Please take your child out of there and complain to the director. It is just terrible to do that to a little one.
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#10 of 12 Old 03-19-2005, 12:17 AM
 
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If your little boy has made friends in that group, I guess I'd ask the teacher for a newsletter of sorts, to find out what $ is due when, so he won't be left alone in the future, how sad & unnecessary. The teacher *could* have prevented his sadness. My mother teaches kindergareten (5yo's in the U.S.) & they save any excess $ to cover the kids whose parents either forgot or just don't have it at that time... poor babe!

If he has no real connections with the care place, I'd maybe check out some others.. jmt (just my thoughts) best luck!

"When the external begins to define the internal, instead of the internal defining the external, one begins living as a mortal rather than as a universal being." ~ unknown
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#11 of 12 Old 03-19-2005, 09:11 AM - Thread Starter
 
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thank you for your support

sometimes i wonder if i make too much of a fuss about things

the things is, oliver really enjoys school and has lots of friends there

and we are moving in the next couple of months anyway and have already signed him up for a new school starting in september so i wouldnt really want to have him change schools twice in the next 6 months

i am just not sure what to do, this probably sounds feeble but i get really enrvous about the idea of confronting his teacher with my concerns and worries as i do not know ow to put them accross in a constructive way that does not sound like an attack and i wouldnt want to make life more difficult for oliver.

i am reluctant to pull him out of school and have ghim go nowhere as all he would want to do is watch tv all day at home, when he is at school he is busy having a good time.

i just really want to make the next term of school as happy for him as it can be just not sure what action i can take to achieve that.
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#12 of 12 Old 03-21-2005, 02:03 AM
 
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That sounds terrible How mean of the teacher. Is it common where you live to be sending preschoolers with money to buy things at school? That sounds odd to me. I would definatly mention the jello thing to the teacher. THere is no reason she could not have made him one. I'd just tell her that your son was sad when he came home that all the other kids had it.

At my ds's school they think it is great that he only goes three days a week. Last year he only went two days a week and they thought that was great too. His teacher told me that it's wonderful that I stay home with him and that kids this age should be spending the bulk of thier time at home with mom. I agree.
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