Hello, my name is Jennifer and I lurk a lot and post every once in a while.
My daughter is 5 1/2 she'll by 6 the middle of September right after the school year starts. She's in a Montessori school where the grades run: Primary 3-6 Lower Elementary 6-9 Upper Elementary 9-12.
Katie has been in primary for 3 years and the teacher is recommending she stay another. I was thinking with a Montessori school this might not be such and issue or stigma. My husband really hates the idea of her staying behind for this reason. Of course, we shouldn't call it staying behind. Anyway, today I was talking to another Montessori mom with older kids and she said that from listening to her kids that perhaps it still is an issue or stigma and all the kids know who's what year etc. The other mom started kindergarten as a 6 year old and hated it and wouldn't recommend it.
Before talking to her I was leaning toward her staying in primary so that she could be one of the big kids for the first time and really be the oldest, biggest, and smartest in the class. I thought that would be great for her, but if then she is going to lose whatever self esteem gains because kids who aren't much older, or even younger (although I don't think that will be the case this year) than her are a year ahead and to make it worse from the look of how her brother is doing he might be likely to move up from primary to elementary at 5 1/2 whereas if she stays in primary she won't move up till she is a few weeks from 7. So how to answer that question if it comes up: Why is Ben moving up at 5 1/2 when I didn't move up till I was almost 7?
But stilll she is having a hard time with reading and some kids just need more time with stuff like that and there is a lot of primary work she hasn't gotten to yet. She also isn't very assertive and doesn't have the personality to really ask for help. She's more likely to just sit back and observe and wait. If she is starting in lower elementary without strong developing reading skills she will need to be assertive in getting help.
So anyway, I just wanted any opinions from anyone who has come upon this issue whether to start kindergarten w/ a 4 year old or wait a year. Or any type of the same kind of thing either with yourself and how you felt and now feel about it or with your kids.
I'm really torn and not sure what I should do?