Who's still nursing? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 01:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know we had another one of these threads, but since it's fallen off the homepage I figured I'd start a new one, since several of the original mamas/babies have likely weaned!

DD (18 months) is still nursing day and night. I think every single night I have visions of night-weaning her via Jay Gordon's method, but by morning I decide that we're not ready. We're out of town this week but when we get back DH and I are planning on starting to transition her to a toddler bed, so I'm hoping that cuts down on the night nursing :P I really wouldn't mind it, but since my supply tanked she chews more than sucks, and it HURTS! I think I would be sore no matter how she was nursing, but this makes it extra bad :P Plus, she FREAKS OUT when I unlatch her, which at this point with my crazy hormones just makes me irritated I feel bed for her because she didn't choose all the changes...I really never thought I'd have any negative feelings about nursing! She has also started to be quite acrobatic while nursing, and while on a normal day that wouldn't bother me, again the hormones make me feel mad

Sarah, loving wife to Michael (9/6/03), SAHM to my big girl Maya "Monkey" Grace (10/5/07) and my baby girl Charlotte "Bugsy" Mae (7/2/09) : :
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#2 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 02:03 PM
 
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Oh mama, you could have written my thoughts right there. My son, who is 2 yrs and 4 months is almost totally weaned now. I was hoping to nurse all the way through the pregnancy and even tandem but I did not expect my own body's reaction when the milk supply went away. It became this skin crawling feeling and I hated it. Me, who LOVED nursing so much. It was such a shock. I could not do it anymore. I would let him latch on, tell him, I'm counting to 10 and then we can snuggle. We did, it had a few crying episodes in the middle of the night, he even hit me a couple of times but it too passed. I just held him and told him I wish I could but my "mamas" hurt. I also told him it was ok to get angry, I understand but I always will love him. Now, two weeks later, he hardly asks for it. I do give him a sippy cup of cow's milk at night (warmed) before bed. He loves the sucking and warmth. Its totally a replacement but its working. It broke my heart, way more than I though but slowly we are moving on. He may or may not come back to nursing when the milk comes in, I'm open. Though I don't know how the latching would work. I've let him try to latch since (in really desperate times - like a nightmare) and man, it seems like he does not know how anymore....anyway, rambling. Just wanted to share my story.
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#3 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 03:00 PM
 
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I, too, did not expect to react to nusring how I am-lol. It hurts so bad and I have DD nursing one time in the afternoon before a nap, and before bed. She has been sick, So i have been nursing her in the middle of the night for a few days. Normally it is just the two times though I do not think that she will stop nursing before baby is born though.

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DD (10/05/06) my spirited pixie, who weaned at 3 yrs 10 months
DD (7/27/09) my UC water baby - I mean toddler!

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#4 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 03:13 PM
 
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I totally thought my ds (2 y. 3 m.) would be one to stick it out, but he is pretty much weaned now. Every few days he asks to nurse, and I always let him try, but there's nothing there, so it doesn't last long. Recently he just put his mouth on and didn't suck. I guess he just wanted the feeling.

It's weird. I'm kind of sad and kind of proud of him/relieved. I'm guessing he'll ask to nurse when the new baby comes, and I'll let him try, but it's weird how unnatural nursing him feels now that we don't do it much. Just 2-3 months ago he was nursing 5-7 times a day, and now it feels so foreign. Weaning is definitely a lesson in letting go and letting my ds grow up. I'm glad we bed share because I think I would really miss him if I didn't nurse and he was away from me all night (I work full time, so that probably contributes).

Bed sharing, baby wearing, breastfeeding mama of Vonn (dob 12/9/07) and Reuben (dob 7/17/09).
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#5 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 03:19 PM
 
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Im still comfort nursing - but havent been making anything for weeks now. She still asks, and I dont refuse...so Im not sure what will happen as we move closer and closer. She is 18months.

Lindsay: DS#1 (06/06) DD#1 (09/07) DS#2 (10/08) DD#2 (06/09). AND A BABY DUE NOVEMBER 2013

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#6 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 03:25 PM
 
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My milk is back pretty strong (as of the past week or so), but, DS usually sucks for just a few seconds, tells me, "dis baby tadib's yeches" (this is baby caleb's milk) and then says, "lay on mama" and goes to sleep on my shoulder. He's gone 2 days (not consecutive though) without nursing in the past week, so I suspect he might be weaning...but, we are also moving to a new apartment Sunday so that may affect him...I'm ok with whatever he wants to do at this point--he's 23mos.
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#7 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 03:30 PM
 
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DD (3) is almost weaned. : She only "nurses" for about a minute right after I turn off the lights before bed. I haven't had any milk for a while now (at least a month), and I've finally been able to limit her nursing. She hasn't done it on her own. I've had to gradually restrict her. The first restriction was that she could only nurse in her room. Then I only let her nurse at night and in the AM. Then I only let her nurse for a set amout of time on each side (while I sing the ABCs). Then I only let her nurse at night. A week ago, I only let her nurse on one side at night. Now I'm singing the ABCs super, duper fast, so I doubt she's nursing more than 30 seconds. She also thinks it is pretty funny that I'm singing so fast, so she's giggling half of the time she's "nursing." I'm going to completely cut her off soon. But she just switched rooms at daycare, and she doesn't deal well with transitions. So once she is settled, I'm going to cut her off completely. Hopefully, she will be done in 2 weeks at the latest. I'm sooooo proud of her and myself, because I wanted her completely weaned by the end of March...and it looks like I'm going to meet my goal (or only be a week off.) :

(I knew that I didn't want to tandem nurse. I'm sad to say that nursing makes DD more needy and whiney. Since I cut out most nursing sessions, DD is so much better about sitting at the dinner table while we are eating. Before she used to whine to nurse a few mintues after we started to eat. but now she sits happily and either eats and chats with us.)

mama to DD (7), DS (3.5), and another DS arriving in August!

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#8 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 04:07 PM
 
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Ohhhhhhhhhh. It is so hard. I never thought that I would hate nursing, but I do. We are down to 2x a day (nap and bed), and I can't stand the feeling, especially the night one. I feel like I want to throw her across the room, which just feels awful. The 2x a day thing is totally at my insistence, though has taken it pretty well. This is how it has been for the past few months.

I really am at a loss about the next step. We have started talking about how we are just going to nurse for a short time, and when I can't take it anymore, I tell her I am going to sing a song and then we will stop, then I sing her to sleep. Sometimes she is good with it, and sometimes she gets pretty angry/upset. She is really clinging to these last 2 nursing sessions.

If it were just me having an aversion, I might just keep trudging through, but I also have concerns about preterm labor. I think my focus is not going to be on stopping altogether, but on not letting a nursing session go over about 10 minutes.

It is nice to hear that many are in the same boat, though I am sorry that others are struggling.

mama to Ingrid (11/06) and Louisa (5/29/09):
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#9 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 04:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Amy ~ I get the "I need to throw something at the wall" feeling at nighttime nursing, as well I try to count to 10 and breathe through it, but if I still feel that way (and then I start to feel like I'm having a panic attack) I unlatch her and hand her to hubby as she has a complete and total meltdown

Sarah, loving wife to Michael (9/6/03), SAHM to my big girl Maya "Monkey" Grace (10/5/07) and my baby girl Charlotte "Bugsy" Mae (7/2/09) : :
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#10 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 05:06 PM
 
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Nursing here, sort of. It doesn't hurt but man does it give me the willy's. DS just turned 2 I'm pretty sure we'll stick it out enough to attempt tandem nursing. He's still got a good latch, even though we only nurse 1-3 times a day and often skip a day or 2 here and there. Nursing session are seriously restricted. . only on the couch, only when being still and only for a short period of time.

I've been a little less restrictive the past few days because we've all got the flu and hoping that there is a little bit of colostrum that he might be getting.

Be, happy momma to Liberty (12-31-02), Henry (3-17-07) and Prudence (7-02-09)
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#11 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 05:10 PM
 
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Originally Posted by haren.13 View Post
Amy ~ I get the "I need to throw something at the wall" feeling at nighttime nursing, as well I try to count to 10 and breathe through it, but if I still feel that way (and then I start to feel like I'm having a panic attack) I unlatch her and hand her to hubby as she has a complete and total meltdown
OMG me too, I would NEVER have thought me capable of this feeling but MAN its skin crawling sometimes. This is why we moved to a sippy cup and warm milk, I personally just could not take it. I tried. We did the counting to 10 thing - my son would count with me (too cute!) - mamas in the mouth and all!

I'm thrilled with how long my son has nursed, he was really down to only a couple of times a night (i work full time). But it's still a letting go. We snuggle a lot and thankfully cosleep because its nice to get him really close still.

So glad to hear of others feeling this way....don't feel like I'm all alone now.
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#12 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 06:03 PM
 
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Still nursing my 22 month old 2x a day nap & bedtime. Definitely painful and not quite sure what we will be doing but feel like I need to make some changes again soon. He is still waking up once a night most nights and is still sleeping in our room. Ideally he will be sleeping through the night and in his brother's room w/o nursing before #3 comes along but I'm not sure how to get there... He still really wants to nurse and I hate to come him off but it does really hurt. So don't know what to do.

Jess ~mom to DS1 8/05, DS2 6/07, DD 7/09 and one surprise 5/11!
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#13 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 08:34 PM
 
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Our dd (2 1/2) is still nursing very occasionally. Sometimes not for a couple of days! It's strange... but this is the way dd1 naturally weaned as well, during dd2's pregnancy. I know some would feel it's "unnatural" but it's just the way things happened! dd1 just decided one day that she didn't need to nurse anymore, but dd2 still comes back for comfort sometimes. There's absolutely not one drop of milk left, and it's very uncomfortable for me, but I think she just likes being close and cradled like a baby. We'll see what happens by the end of the pregnancy... I am open to tandem nursing, but would also be relieved if she stopped nursing before baby arrives.

Grateful midwife and peaceful mama to my wonderful children: dd11, dd8, ds5 and 07/15

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#14 of 44 Old 03-25-2009, 09:42 PM
 
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Yup, still nursing here, but I've cut ds back to right before bed, first thing in the morning, and before nap.
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#15 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 01:34 AM
 
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I guess I am pretending to nurse! My milk went away and came back. My daughter latches on but I never seem to achieve let down. I can't say that I enjoy nursing anymore. I just keep reminding myself that even if it is a few drops, it is better then nothing. I am hoping that once the baby is born she will be able to nurse during or after him.
I want to congratulate all you mommies that are sticking with it. : I also want to congratulate all the mommies of have gently weened their little ones! :

Lovin my Hubby , Serena (10/07)::, and Cedar( 07/09)
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#16 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 01:49 AM
 
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My milk dried up almost two months ago (DS is 21 mo) but he still tries to nurse at least once a week. It's like a status check. I feel so bad that I don't have any for him although it was a bit of a relief because nursing had become quite painful and was causing contractions.

Mama to DS (6/07) h20homebirth.gif, DD (6/09) h20homebirth.gif, and DD (07/12) homebirth.jpg..

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#17 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 05:38 AM
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Me. I don;t think there's any milk: it was gone by January ad the boobs were sore from Dec. throught Feb.. Less uncomfortable now, which is good b/c DD is definitely not ready to sign off. She calls them HER boobies, and corrects me if I call them mine. *sigh*

eta: yes, me too with the weird feeling of nursing with no/little milk. It's been rough.
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#18 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 09:14 AM
 
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well after i posted that I thought we were about done yesterday, he's been nursing like crazy since I picked him up from daycare last night lol...
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#19 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 10:38 AM
 
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Ohhhhhhhhhh. It is so hard. I never thought that I would hate nursing, but I do. We are down to 2x a day (nap and bed), and I can't stand the feeling, especially the night one. I feel like I want to throw her across the room, which just feels awful. The 2x a day thing is totally at my insistence, though has taken it pretty well. This is how it has been for the past few months.

I really am at a loss about the next step. We have started talking about how we are just going to nurse for a short time, and when I can't take it anymore, I tell her I am going to sing a song and then we will stop, then I sing her to sleep. Sometimes she is good with it, and sometimes she gets pretty angry/upset. She is really clinging to these last 2 nursing sessions.

If it were just me having an aversion, I might just keep trudging through, but I also have concerns about preterm labor. I think my focus is not going to be on stopping altogether, but on not letting a nursing session go over about 10 minutes.

It is nice to hear that many are in the same boat, though I am sorry that others are struggling.
I was there just a month ago, and cutting back the sessions in terms of length really helped. First, I stopped nursing her to sleep. I would rock and cuddle with her. It took a while for that to take, but it did eventually. Then I limited her nursing to while I sang the ABCs on each side. For DD, that worked way better than counting down (suggestion from someone at LLL). It is just about trial and error to see what works best for your child. DD has taken it so much better than I expected (yes there were tears). She was such a boob-aholic.

I totally understand that feeling about wanting to throw something across the room...or wanting to scream "STOP NURSING. THAT'S ENOUGH." It is hard because nursing was soooo wonderful for so long, and I could have never imagined I would end up hating it. That is why I wanted to stop ASAP, so I wouldn't have that negative nursing association when the baby arrived. DD still "nurses" for a minute each day, but it doesn't seem to bother me because it is soooo minimal and I know we are almost done.

mama to DD (7), DS (3.5), and another DS arriving in August!

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#20 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 10:50 AM - Thread Starter
 
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For me, anyway, I'm not *too* worried about disliking nursing when the baby is born. I remember the warm squishy feeling when my milk lets down, and I don't get that anymore (no milk = no letdown :P). I think that once my milk comes back in it will be MUCH better (to nurse both DD and the new LO).

FWIW, I'm almost 26 weeks and I've noticed that my milk (or colostrum, I suppose) is really starting to increase! For a long time I couldn't express even one drop, then the last couple weeks I've been able to get a few drops here and there. Yesterday I checked and I got enough to drip down on my hand! I forgot how sticky that stuff is :P So, that gives me hope that nursing will get better with DD (a friend told me that it's much better when your colostrum is in). When I was pregnant with DD I remember being able to even squirt a bit of colostrum (sorry TMI! ) so hopefully I will make as much this time around so neither of us gets so frustrated with the lack of milk!

Sarah, loving wife to Michael (9/6/03), SAHM to my big girl Maya "Monkey" Grace (10/5/07) and my baby girl Charlotte "Bugsy" Mae (7/2/09) : :
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#21 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 12:01 PM
 
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Um, DS is still nursing once a day for about a minute a side at bed time.

He turned 5 on the weekend. I have no idea if he is getting anything or not.

It's not that comfortable but I can certainly handle it for 2 minutes a day. He comes off when I tell him to.

Me (42), DH (41), DD (7), DS1 (5) and DS2 Aug 02/09
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#22 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 12:21 PM
 
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We weaned when I was 14 weeks pregnant. I couldn't not take the pain anymore, and it was making me cry every time he latched on. DS was 26 months at the time. I had only ever intended to go to 2, so I thought I would be okay with the decision. DS was only nursing at night, and one night I just told him mama nums nums hurt, so no nums nums tonight. He repeated me, gave my breasts a kiss, and never asked again. I cried for a week as we cuddled to sleep.
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#23 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 12:30 PM
 
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We weaned when I was 14 weeks pregnant. I couldn't not take the pain anymore, and it was making me cry every time he latched on. DS was 26 months at the time. I had only ever intended to go to 2, so I thought I would be okay with the decision. DS was only nursing at night, and one night I just told him mama nums nums hurt, so no nums nums tonight. He repeated me, gave my breasts a kiss, and never asked again. I cried for a week as we cuddled to sleep.
Oh that's so sweet and sad! Your story made me tear up! It is SO hard letting go of nursing. Have you seen this poem?

Wean Me Gently

by Cathy Cardall

I know I look so big to you,

Maybe I seem too big for the needs I have.

But no matter how big we get,

We still have needs that are important to us.

I know that our relationship is growing and changing,

But I still need you. I need your warmth and closeness,

Especially at the end of the day

When we snuggle up in bed.

Please don't get too busy for us to nurse.

I know you think I can be patient,

Or find something to take the place of a nursing;

A book, a glass of something,

But nothing can take your place when I need you.

Sometimes just cuddling with you,

Having you near me is enough.

I guess I am growing and becoming independent,

But please be there.

This bond we have is so strong and so important to me,

Please don't break it abruptly.

Wean me gently,

Because I am your mother,

And my heart is tender. ©

Bed sharing, baby wearing, breastfeeding mama of Vonn (dob 12/9/07) and Reuben (dob 7/17/09).
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#24 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 01:02 PM
 
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My DD is 3 years 3 months old and we are back down (again) to once or twice a day. My preference is one (bedtime only) but sometimes she asks in the morning also. If she asks during the day I tell her she has to wait until bedtime. She's not thrilled, but will make due with cuddles and "tummy" (she likes to touch my tummy). It almost breaks my heart to say no when she comes up and asks "can I have nursie to help me calm down?", but I know that I just can't do it. It hurts so much now. I can handle the night time nurse so much better if I don't let her nurse during the day. So, that's what we do.
I would like to get her to stop completely, but I just don't know if that is possible. I'd really rather not tandum, but I won't make her wean if it's going to be horrible for her either. Not sure what I'm going to do. I just hope DH doesn't decide to jump in with any opinions any time soon. (He's been great, but I could see why he would suggest weaning. I wouldn't blame him, but it wouldn't be well received. LOL)

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#25 of 44 Old 03-26-2009, 07:26 PM
 
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I am.

DS is 5. Sometimes it feels a bit much, but other times, it still just melts my heart to see him nursing.

Its SO painful when he first latches on, though. He's old enough now, though, that he only wants to nurse for about 20-30 seconds (usually).

We've talked about weaning, but he is very clear that he is NOT ready, and I don't want push him. Some days he only nurses 2 times (once upon waking and right before bed), other times its more frequent, if he is having a challenging day, or if I am sitting a lot. I don't always say yes when it starts feeling like too much.

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#26 of 44 Old 03-27-2009, 01:55 AM
 
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DS is still my nursling at 24 months.
There are times when I think "Please, no more!"
But in my heart I know neither of us are ready. I so wanted to tandem my DD and my DS before he was born, but DD weaned right after our BFP, and tried a few times, but the milk threw her off (guess I dried up pretty quick)
I thought I would never have to wean DS, that he would do it on his own...wasn't expecting to get another BFP with #3 so early.

My milk is loooong gone and it saddens me when he pulls off that he no longer has that little milk dribble in the corner of his mouth. I feel horrible thinking I want him to stop! I really hope my milk comes back soon for him. The comfort feeling is enough for both of us...even in the moments when my skin crawls!

Praying that when our July baby is here that I can tandem them both. I don't want to give up yet on my "big baby".
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#27 of 44 Old 03-27-2009, 02:54 AM
 
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I've nursed non stop since my daughter was born in november 04. I nursed her trough my last pregnancy and tandemnursed after my son was born. But after I got pregnant again I weaned her. My son is 18 months and still nursing, but he no longer nurses during the night.
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#28 of 44 Old 03-27-2009, 03:29 PM
 
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Ds#2 is still nursing to sleep, so nap and night time and then when he wakes up. He's 2 and 4 months. I'm going to wean him in the next month or so. I don't think painful, unhappy nursing is healthy for poor tired mamas.
I weaned ds #1 when he was 2.5 and I was pregnant. It was awful to nurse and making me crazy. It took a week after cutting back to 2-3 times a day and there were some tears but he ended up seeming to understand and wasn't too concerned.
I'm not having that this time interestingly. I did night wean him pretty much at the beginning of my pregnancy. Wow, that was nice
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#29 of 44 Old 03-27-2009, 07:09 PM
 
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My son is 22 months old and I think is finally giving up. I don't offer or refuse but our last nursing session was four days agao at naptime he could get nothing and it was so painful for me. We have taken to rocking together to get him down for naps. He shares a bed with his sister so he lays between the two of us to fall asleep without nursing now.
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#30 of 44 Old 03-27-2009, 10:08 PM
 
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My nursing journey with Timothy has all but ended :-( :-( He now maybe nurses about once every 3 days.... I'm pretty sure he isn't getting anything.

It is bittersweet. I feel less tired than I did when we breastfed frequently and I am somehow relieved that it is done; but on the other hand I really, really miss this special time with him!
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