no sex drive - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 08-25-2009, 06:51 PM - Thread Starter
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Maybe this is tmi but I honestly have no sex drive and no interest in dtd. I feel bad for dh because he seems soo very interested.. and I would rather sleep. Last night.. I fell alseep...I felt really bad, but between bf and lack of sleep plus my tummy is less than what it was before, I don't have much interest in sex.

Am I the only one who feels like sex is the last thing on my mind? It probably doesn't help that lo is still sleeping in our room, every time I hear him I go into mommy mode, and he is a loud sleeper.

Angie - mom to Allie 12/01, Ephram 07/09  and Asher 3/1/11
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#2 of 6 Old 08-25-2009, 07:01 PM
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I am in the opposite boat. Only 3 weeks postpartum and DYING to DTD. But waiting for safety's sake. At least until 4 weeks pp. I'm sorry you feel that way. sometimes we moms feel touched out and worn down and I think it is perfectly understandable and normal for you to feel like that.

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#3 of 6 Old 08-25-2009, 07:43 PM
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Audmommy- I diddo that!! I was super hormonal when preggo and very much had interest in DTD. Towards the end my husband was actually turning me down at my disgust!!! Now---no interest whatsoever. I thought that maybe this no sex drive in the past was due to being on birth control. But I can't blame it on that anymore since I am not on anything. I guess maybe this is how I am just wired. My poor hubby
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#4 of 6 Old 08-25-2009, 09:45 PM
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No drive, no time if I did... ugh.

hh2.gif Proud Mama to DS1 09/07 ribboncesarean.gif, DD 07/09 hbac.gif, and DS2 06/11 uc.jpg.  Feeling more and more blessed with each day!



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#5 of 6 Old 08-26-2009, 06:17 PM
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I don't either. It's been 8 weeks post now and we still haven't DTD. He REALLY wants to, and I totally don't

We are going out of town this weekend and booked a room so maybe that will help to get me in the mood (baby is coming with us, however, but DS1 is staying with grandma).

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My boys: S (4) & O (2) & Expecting #3 in Dec. 2011

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#6 of 6 Old 08-27-2009, 01:51 AM
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I had no interest at all after DS1 was born - I was so thankful for the "mandatory" 6 week wait... I think we went longer than that, even. And it hurt like heck! It was slightly uncomfortable for months afterward. Things were infrequent for a long time. I avoided any sort of physical touch like the plague.

This time around, it has been very different. We DTD after only a couple of weeks, and it didn't even hurt all that much. Things have been busy, so DTD is not an every night occurrence by a long stretch, but there is a difference in mindset - I am definitely interested. A lot of things probably go into this - I had the *best* birth with DS2 and DH made me feel like a goddess afterwards (he is a man that really appreciates a good natural birth - he is very in awe ). Also, the fact that we are married now makes a difference for me - I know he is in it for the long haul. Also, I am more confident in my mama skills and less paranoid - the snurgles and gurgles of a newborn don't keep me up anymore - I know that he is just making noise, not fussing or crying. And I am confident in my decision to cosleep - last time we tried so many things (and I got no sleep) and finally wound up cosleeping. This time, I tried the cosleeper bassinet for a night or two, realized that the newborn wanted to be closer to mama (imagine that! ), and ditched it. The kid practically STTN, where DS1 took nearly two years to do that. Granted temperament has something to do with it as well, but the combination is working for us.

I feel a lot different after this second birth compared to the first. I am actually trying not to propostion the husband too often until I get my IUD after the 6 wk pp check. This birth and this baby is great, but I don't need another right now!


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