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#1 of 11 Old 10-12-2009, 01:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am just feeling overwhelming guilt about working. I am working from home, though, and I have someone coming to the house 15 hours a week to hold Amelia or run errands or clean for me. But, I am not just snuggling up with her every day like I want to.

What does your day look like with your baby? Are you busy, or do you just hang out with your baby?

This is my average day;
Dh wakes up and takes Amelia for an hour, then brings her back to bed with me and I nurse her. I get up and spend about 15 minutes with dh and ds, then they leave for work/school.

I put Amelia back to bed and she sleeps on and off for the next three hours. Sometimes she sleeps in the wrap on my chest, sometimes I leave her in bed, sometimes the nanny is here and holds her or puts her in the swing in my office if she is staying asleep well.

I go do a shoot for 2-3 hours and leave her with dh (on the weekends) or the nanny brings her with me to the shoot.

I pick up ds from school at 3pm, then spend the next three hours hanging out with him and making dinner while the baby is still napping in her carseat.

Dh gets home, we spend a half hour catching up, then he puts ds to bed while I rock the baby. Then he puts the baby to bed and I get some work done. Then I go crash in bed and watch tv shows on my laptop while dh has the baby in the sling in another room.

Obviously throughout the day she wakes up and I spend time rocking her, sitting on the ball, or nursing her.

I know it is MUCH better than working full time out of the house. But I feel so guilty anyways. Maybe I would feel better if I heard what a normal day is like for a good, stay at home mom.
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#2 of 11 Old 10-12-2009, 01:31 PM
 
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My day roughly..

8:00am - Olivine and I wake up together. DH has usually left for work already and pretty much just wakes up, showers and leaves, so we don't see him in the morning.

8:30 - I make breakfast for DS and I while Olivine sits in her swing for a couple of minutes. (She'll usually be happy in the swing for 5-10 minutes)

8:30-10:00 - I sit at my computer and enjoy my coffee and breakfast. Olivine sits on my lap and quietly looks around before she falls asleep for her morning nap (on my chest or in my swing if I'm taking a shower). DS is usually watching TV or taking a bath.

10:00-11:00 - We all go for a 2-3 mile walk to burn off some energy before DS goes to school (and to get me back in shape). Olivine goes in her Moby and takes a nap at this time.

11:15-11:40 - I help my son practice his violin. Olivine will either be in the swing or in the Moby depending on how she's feeling.

11:45-12:20 - Lunch

12:20 - DS goes to kindergarten

12:30-3:30 - I either take a nap, clean my house or run errands. All of which Olivine is in the Moby or right next to me.

4:00-5:00 - Either violin lessons or soccer practice.

6:00 - DS comes home and plays with DS and holds Olivine while I make dinner.

6:00-8:00 - Family time, cleaning, reading, etc.

8:30 - DS goes to bed.

8:30-10:30 - DH, Olivine and I snuggle on the couch and watch TV or one of us walks her around if she's unhappy.

All in all my day is pretty mellow and I feel like I get plenty of time to snuggle and smile and talk to my baby. She still spends most of the time sleeping in the Moby though. I like my day to go at a slow pace. It works better if I can be relaxed and get everything done because my husband is a high stress person.

Abra, Married to George, Mother to DS 12/03 & DD1 08/09 & DD2 12/11 + Someone New in May 2015! After years of planning, we are finally living our dream in South America!!
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#3 of 11 Old 10-12-2009, 03:23 PM
 
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dont feel guilty Stacey... sounds like you are doing a great job balancing everything!

Our typical day:

DS gets up around 7 and DH takes him for about an hour and a half while I workout, take shower, grab breakfast etc

Sometime between 9 and 10 I take DS back, nurse him, play for an hour or so and then he goes down for a nap (he loves to sleep in his swing or on his playmat.) He usually sleeps 1 to 2 hours (sometimes more) throughout the day.

When he wakes I nurse him, play for a bit and then he goes back to sleep for another 2 hours. While he sleeps I clean my house, garden and get whatever work I can done for our business. This continues until about 4ish.

I keep him awake until 6pm to wear him out a bit then I nurse him to sleep and make dinner/spend alone time with DH. He usually wakes again when we finish and we both spend time with him until about 10 and then we are all in bed again.

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#4 of 11 Old 10-12-2009, 03:48 PM
 
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My day roughly

4am feed baby bottle, go back to bed
8ish get up and start school, school w/ B&K, baby usually still sleeping, kids have already eaten and tidied, juggle school, babies, nursing. It is hard. Dh gets littles dressed, he is still off from work. 11:30, someone starts lunch
9am nurse Finnian
10:30am put Finnian down
11am grade younger schoolwork, go over w/ A&T
11:30 try to get shower
Noon, feed everyone, T&B clean kitchen
12:45, change diapers, nurse Eiley
1pm put Eiley and Innish down for naps
1:15pm do Algebra w/ M&A, grade rest of school work, work w/ M&A on Latin, etc, nurse Finnian at the same time
2pm, put Finnian down
1-2pm, girls fold and hang laundry
2ish girls get Innish up when he calls, dh and I have quiet time w/ each other
3pm get Eiley up
4pm start dinner
4:30pm get Finnian up, someone changes him, puts him in swing or holds him if he needs it or they do dinner
5pm eat dinner, nurse Finnian
5:30pm older girl cleans kitchen
6:30pm go for walk, teenagers babysit littles
7pm rosary
7:30pm read and brush teeth, nurse Finnian, everyone tidies house
8pm, bedtime for younger ones, dh and I have time to ourselves
9pm bedtime for big ones
10pm, give Finnian a bottle
11pm, get Finnian to bed, go to bed

Annabelle Catholic wife to Jeff '92 and mom to Makaley 19 Arden 19 Anniston 17 Taegan 14 Balen 12 Kellen 10 Ellery 8 Innish 6 Eiley 4 Finnian 3 Esca 2 our 8th uc.jpghomeschool.gifwaterbirth.jpgIHhbac.gifbftoddler.gifvbac.gifand expecting sweet pea January 2014.

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#5 of 11 Old 10-12-2009, 04:33 PM
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I have to admit I love not working. Well, sometimes anyway.

These days, my day looks like this:

11 am. Drag self out of bed (hubby gets up with the kids and lets me sleep in because he is sweet). Nurse baby. Change baby, put her in a sling. Sit at computer and check email. Eat some breakfast. Say hi and hug and kiss my older kids, who are usually oogling the baby by this point. Eventually babe wakes up from nap in sling, change her, nurse her, stick her back in sling, check email. See what the other kids are getting themselves into. Make lunch. Check email again. Fart around on the computer. Take kids on a walk or to the park, or go to the grocery store. Some kind of outing. Come home. Nurse and change baby. Put baby back in sling. Make dinner. Nurse baby a ton because now it's her fussy/cluster feeding time. Change her several more times. Finally put her in sling and rock/sway/shush her to sleep. By this point DH comes home and puts kids to bed. Play some WoW or other fun thing I can't do when the kids are up. Go to bed. Rinse and repeat.
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#6 of 11 Old 10-12-2009, 06:03 PM
 
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I wish I didn't have to work, but that isn't in the cards for me at the moment.

5:50 - 7:20AM Slip out of bed and shower, feed the dogs, prepare my pumping bag and lunch, feed and kiss DS, say byebye to DS and DH and head off to work (not necessarily in that order)

7:40 - 12:30 Pump, work, pump, work

12:30 - 1PM DH brings DS to work and I breastfeed in the parking lot, kisses and snuggles all around

1PM - 4:30 work, pump, work, head home

4:50 - 7PM Arrive home, breastfeed, kisses and snuggles, wash my pump parts, change into comfy clothes, eat dinner, floor playtime/tummy time if DS is awake, breastfeed (not necessarily in that order)

7PM - 9/10PM Quiet time - If DS is awake, we just hold him while we watch TV, sing/read to him quietly in a darkened room, breastfeed

9/10PM We all go to bed if DS is asleep

10PM - 5:50AM I breastfeed in bed every 2-3 hours. DH does diaper changes as needed. DH will take DS into the living room and rock him if he is restless so I can try to get some sleep for work.

And repeat.


ETA - Whoops, I just reread and saw you wanted to see stay at home mom's days. Well this should make you feel much better! Working full time with a little baby at home sucks!!!

Happily married mom to DS (Aug 09) and two furry troublemakers.

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#7 of 11 Old 10-13-2009, 12:38 PM
 
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It sounds like everyone is doing great! We all have such different family dynamics and really need to do what works for us, KWIM?

Our day goes something like this:

5:30 DH gets up and leaves for work
6:00 I nurse and change baby boy, cuddle him until 22 month old toddler comes into our room to wake me up for the day.
6:30ish Baby goes into the swing and I get up and turn on PBS kids for my three girls, ages 6, 4, and 22 months.
7-8am I sneak into the computer room and catch up on message boards, email, editing photos, etc., baby is asleep in swing and girls are playing.
8am I make breakfast and we eat
8:30 I get baby, nurse him, change him, sometimes bathe him, do dishes, laundry, general clean up, hug on my girls, etc. We shower and dress for the day, back into jammies, cozy clothes if we are staying home.
9-11:30 TV goes off, we play, I make my to do list, shopping list, etc. baby sometimes goes back to sleep, or sits in the bouncer and watches girls play, or I hold him in the sling... he is an easy baby, so mostly I use the sling while we are out. Sometimes we run errands after breakfast, usually once-twice a week.
11:30-2pm I make lunch, and toddler goes down for a nap after lunch. I homeschool the older girls while toddler naps. baby is with me, nursing, cuddling, etc. during this time.
2-5 girls play or finish up schooling, I finish up any cleaning, start dinner, etc. Baby will nap again after I was holding him from 12-2 and then he'll be up again to nurse before we sit down to dinner.
5:30ish, dinner with hubby and kids, baby nursing at table or sitting on bouncer on kitchen counter
after dinner the girls play the Wii with my hubby, we goof off, I sneak back on the computer for a bit, baby always with me, or I am the one completely responsible for baby if he calls.... hubby doesn't hold him much at this point, he does help a lot with the olders, though.
7ish, girls down to bed in their triple bunk beds.
DH and I hang out, I nurse, nurse, nurse and we are usually in bed with baby by 9 or 10. If baby will hang out in swing, hubby and I have "alone" time.
I nurse Isaac 3-4 times during the night, sometimes I sneak him back into the swing around 4am until the last "night" feeding around 6am.
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#8 of 11 Old 10-13-2009, 06:56 PM
 
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So much depends on situation, you know? There really isn't a "good" mom out there... everyone just does the best they can with what they have.

My SAHM week has a few "firm commitments":

Mon- therapy for dd2 9am-10am
Tues- playgroup 10-noon
Wed- preschool for dd1 9am-2pm
Thur- preschool for dd1 9am-2pm
Fri- preschool for dd1 9am-2pm
Sat- brunch with the grandparents 10-noon, CSA pickup anytime 9am-3pm
Sun- church 10-noon

DS tends to wake up fussy around 5:30am. We nurse and he zonks a bit till the girls wake up at around 7. We get up and I get everyone dressed, fed, brushed, (packed up and out the door if it's a preschool day). I do the dishes and clean up after breakfast, empty the dryer, put clothing away, and drink much coffee.

Depending on the day I may find myself in town with two kiddos and time to kill so we do shopping, errands, etc.

If we're home we do crafts, watch dvds, I vacuum/tidy as the messes happen, I do my MDC "mod time", I keep up with a few online friends/family/communities.

In the afternoon I get dd1 (if applicable), prep dinner, try to hold on till DH gets home.

We eat, I get the girls bathed/jammied/brushed/to bed. DH holds DS while I shower, start the laundry, do the dishes, get into jammies. Then I hold/nurse DS while DH gets me some tea and we watch a dvd or chat. I go to bed around 10pm most nights.

Diaper changes for DS and dd2 happen at random. Breastfeeding happens as necessary. Dr appointments, friend visits, etc happen if I'm lucky. And of course we're building a house and hoping to get stuff done before the snow flies... probably in the next week or three.

Be pretty! Be practical! Be Pagan! Visit Pagan Hearth & Home!
 mama to lady.gif(4/05), hearts.gif(6/07vbac), diaper.gif(8/09vbac), and babygirl.gif (9/11vbac)

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#9 of 11 Old 10-20-2009, 10:13 AM
 
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6:30 am - get up and get older boys up for school, get the boys dressed, fed, teeth brused, etc.

7:00 am breakfast, Jack usually is asleep

7:15 take older boys to bus stop
7:20 get Christian dressed for school, breakfast, take him to school at 7:50 am, get Jack ready, get in car and take Christian to school.

8:15 come home and nurse Jack, get ready for work for the day. Give Jack a bath.

8:40 put Jack back to nap or play with him if he is awake. Read my work emails and write to do list for the day

9:00 if Jack is asleep, I sometimes lie back down, if not, then talk to him, put him in the sling and start cleaning for that day (each day is a different area of the house)

nurse Jack as needed from 9-11, then he generally naps for 2 hours.

1:00 try to eat lunch

2:00 nursing Jack and getting ready for the boys to come home from school. sometimes we take a little nap, I am generally tired by 2.

2:45-2:55 older boys come home, take a break and then at 3:30 time for homework

3:30 hold Jack while boys do work, help them with homework and go over Ukranian homework.

4:30 make dinner, older boys play with Jack while I cook

5:15- 5:30 eat dinner, nurse Jack

6:30 quiet time for the boys, go over studying and hang out, talk about the day, etc.

7:15 start bedtime routine for the older guys, Dad holds Jack

8:00 prayers, then older boys go to bed

8:10 - 9:40 nurse Jack on and off (generally)

10-10:15 Jack falls asleep, put him in the co-sleeper, then I work more on laundry and some cleaning, somtimes I hang out w/my husband unless he already is sleeping.

midnight-Jack nursing, bring him into bed with us

2:30am - 6am nursing Jack when he needs it

6:30 am start again

Take care!

Jen, mama to  (M-13, N- 10, C- 8 rainbow1284.gif J- 3.5, and rainbow1284.gifJ -2, angel3.gifA (10/4/07) and 3 early losses)
We are expecting baby #7 in November 2013

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#10 of 11 Old 10-20-2009, 09:38 PM
 
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I work at home and at my office. Baby comes with me on days that I go in. Generally the days are the same, except drive time is cut down on days I do not go into the office. When I go to work, I bring the boys to school. When I stay home, DH brings them.

I go into the office 3 days per week.

6:30 wake for the day. Sometimes baby is awake, sometimes he sleeps for another hour.
6:30-7:20 either shower and pump or make lunches and pump. If I am going to work, I shower. If not, I do lunches and breakfast. Then feed baby. If baby is awake during this time, he is in the bouncy till we walk out the door, neither DH or I have time to carry him around while making all breakfasts or getting ready.
7:20-8:00 either shower and get ready for day if I am staying home, or drive to school and work. Baby still in bouncy or car. Normally fussy by the end of this time- as he is ready to go back to sleep.
8:00-2:00 either at work or doing work around home. Where baby nurses and rotates between swing, my arms, another person's arms, floor, etc. If he is asleep I am not holding him as that is the best time to work. When I am home I hold him more and work less.
2:10 leave to pick up kids from school. Pick one up at 2:30 and the other 3:00pm so between 2:30 and 3pm I hold and snuggle or nurse baby and visit with DS2 before I get DS1.
3:00-3:30 drive home, baby in car seat.
*One day per week we go to swim lessons. Baby in sling during this time.
3:30-5:30 do things around the house and playing with kids, while holding baby or he is in swing or in bouncy. I am also making dinner at this time. Days where dinner is more complex, baby is not being held as much. nurse when needed
2 days per week one of either ds1 or ds2 has tball practice and I am getting them ready, then we leave, where baby is in the car again. I sling him while we are at the games.
5:30-6ish dinner
6:30-7:30 shower, books, bed, nurse for baby. Baby is in arms if fussy, and in swing or bouncy if not and I help more with baths and bed.
7:30 baby sleeping in swing unless his schedule is way off (happens more on tball nights as he sleeps in car/sling)
7:30-9:30 time with DH, tv, comp, paying bills, cleaning and getting lunches and breakfast ready on counter to make quickly in the am.
9:30-10 nurse baby again and put back to bed.
10:30ish I go to bed.
10:30-6:30 nurse baby as needed. Normally twice.

Phew. I exhausted myself just reading that. I do find as a working from home and bring baby to work with me, that any time baby is happy or sleeping peacefully, I put him down and visit with him while my hands are free. If he is fussy or having a rough day there is a lot of the same with slinging involved.

Busy wife to dh for 5 years and mama to ds1 (11.09.04), ds2 (7.17.06) and ds3 coming Aug 09. :::
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#11 of 11 Old 10-21-2009, 11:34 PM
 
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It really depends on the day, but I/we generally get up sometime between 7-8 and get breakfast, nurse and play/wake up for an hour or two then wed/thurs we have playgroup at 10, and tues storytime at 10 (so we have to be out of here by 9:45 at the latest), then we tend to get home just in time for lunch and nap (DS1 naps from 2-4ish), then wake up and a little snack while I make dinner to eat ~5:30-6:30 depending on the day (tues/thurs we have tae kwon do whcih starts at 6:30 so dinner needs to be ready at 5:30, other days it can go a bit later), then clean up, go outside and play/feed the animals (we have ducks, chickens, goats & dogs that need fed/waterd). Then come back in and play/read/watch movie till bedtime ~8:30. Days that we don't have playgroup or storytime, we usually go for a walk in the morning and play outside if its nice. I try to squeeze a walk in sometime during the day even when we do have playgroup but it doesn't always work out, esp as it gets dark earlier its much harder vs when it was light till 8 or 9!!
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