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#31 of 35 Old 11-06-2009, 01:33 PM
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I'm sorry you've had such a rough transition with your new little one. Mothering is hard. Each decision is about balancing the needs of each member in the family. As hard as it must have been to give up nursing your DD, you definitely made the right decision

I can't imagine dealing with the turmoil of losing a close friend in the midst of postpartum recovery and then having to give up BF To go through all of that while also trying to find the right bi-polar medications sounds so rough.

Sending love and light. I hope with the new medication and some distance from the other difficulties, that things will start to look up for you and your family.

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#32 of 35 Old 11-06-2009, 02:15 PM
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Originally Posted by Truckerdoo View Post
Crashing this conversation and was wondering about this point. Is this sanitary/hygenic? Do people really do this? Is the milk tested or screened or something?
The milk I donate is given directly to another baby. I pump and freeeze the milk and then she picks it up every 2 weeks or so. We didn't test or screen anything. She just trusted that I was fully tested for communicable diseases while pregnant and that I wouldn't BF my own child if my milk wasn't safe. We've never had a problem doing it this way.

However, some people do choose to pay for a medical exam for the donating mother to make sure she's healthy and not on drugs or anything.

It's not cost effective to go through a milk bank where they can pasteurize and screen the milk. It ends up costing as much as $3 per oz!

Abra, Married to George, Mother to DS 12/03 & DD1 08/09 & DD2 12/11 + Someone New in May 2015! After years of planning, we are finally living our dream in South America!!
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#33 of 35 Old 11-06-2009, 02:32 PM
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Although I think you could kill most any germs by boiling the milk, that would also "kill" the milk's live active good stuff - still better than formula, but . . .

Here as mama to W (2/04), R (5/06), D (7/09), and J (12/9/12!), co-parenting with my DH

I WOH part-time, am a doula & childbirth educator, home/unschool, and hope we are nearing the center of chaos


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#34 of 35 Old 11-06-2009, 06:56 PM
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Originally Posted by Truckerdoo View Post
Crashing this conversation and was wondering about this point. Is this sanitary/hygenic? Do people really do this? Is the milk tested or screened or something?

We do. I pray and trust my gut. The milk is not tested, I have only asked for records from one mom. If a mama is feeding her wee one her milk I feel it is good for my baby as well. We have been incredibly blessed by all our milk mamas!
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#35 of 35 Old 11-06-2009, 11:50 PM
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Big hugs... bipolar runs in my family too and having grown up with parents who didn't medicate/didn't proactively manage their own mental health I second the sentiment that what you are doing is a huge gift to your family! I completely understand the sense of guilt/loss (as a doula and extremely outspoken natural birth advocate who then had a c/s, ppd, and ptsd and had to face all the "I told you so" and "you just didn't do X" comments). Give yourself permission to really grieve the loss and process it, you deserve the time and space to find a new balance.

I know it can be hard to find milk... I'm glad your LLL group has a list. You might also contact doulas, LCs, or pedatric care providers to see if they have similar lists or would let you post flyers. But you're right... it's hard to find a donor. I've donated for years and even in my very small town it seems like there are a dozen in need for every one donor. I wish we lived closer because I'd be happy to donor you!

Hang in there and keep taking care of yourself! Like the flight attendants say, you have to get your own mask in place before you can help your kiddos.

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