SO I am having nightmares now. I need to vent this ... hope it's ok.
My first dream last week I dreamed I was in labor and DH bothered me so I kicked him out of the room and layed down on my stomach and pushed the baby out no problem. The midwife was holding the baby and he was all sparkly with dark eyes and dark hair and sweet as can be.
Dream number 2 I have the baby again effortlessly but he's not quite right. My DD comes downstairs as I am holding the baby and I say wait a minute as I rush to the bathroom not wanting her to see him (he looked like Benjamin Button) and get upset ... when in the bathroom he nursed white breastmilk and opened his blue eyes and that was nice ...although he still wasn't quite right.
Last night ... I dreamed I was in labor in my birth pool and wanted to be alone ... then there was blood, lots of it and then a shark in my La Bassine.
What gives, how can I calm these fears and anxieties ... or IS there really something else going on???????
I am so sad today.
I am doing my birth visualizations. I am doing my hypnobirthing religiously. I am trying to be uber positive ... but it's just not working.
I could use some reassurance if you have any to spare!