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Old 09-18-2009, 11:48 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Just wondering how you all are doing? Feeling like you've practiced enough? Hypnosis going okay? Do you feel confident it'll work? Are your partners practicing with you? Have you prepared a cheat sheet or anything?

Just generally wondering how you all are feeling, preparedness-wise with Hypnobabies.
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Old 09-18-2009, 12:24 PM
 
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I have finished the workbook and I listen to the scripts every day, but some days I find it easier to relax and focus than others. A couple of nights ago I was so sore and uncomfortable, and so paranoid about going into labor early, that I thought for sure the HB would help me relax.... WRONG. It was so annoying, I could only sit through about 15 minutes of it. That kind of worries me. I just don't know yet if it is "working" on me. I really want it to work, but I feel like my brain is resistant to following the cues, and I almost always fall asleep during the scripts. And don't get me started on remembering to practice the techniques 5+ times a day. Like THAT'S going to happen. Another thing that I've had to work around is the "relax" cue. All my life, if someone tells me to "relax" (or to "chill out") it sends me into a blinding rage. I can't explain it. There's got to be a better word to use; I'm thinking of telling my DH and doula to use the "peace" cue instead. I've had to modify a lot of the verbiage in the scripts to suit me, and I do worry that my resistance to the way it is set up is going to be a problem.

I have found, however, that the "center switch" technique has come in very handy when dealing with my SPD. Anytime I have trouble getting up or moving around, I tell myself that "I can only feel comfort, pleasure, touch and pressure" in the middle part of my body, and it works! Hallelujah.

DH said he was committed to practicing with me but he hasn't done it. He has ADD and it drives him insane to have to sit through anything for that long. But he is super supportive, and he's happy to listen to ME explain the process to him, so I think he will still be great when the time comes.

Doula ~ CBE ~ Life Partner to my ManBearPeach ~ Multiple-miscarriage Survivor ~ Homebirthing, Breastfeeding, CDing, Babywearing, Co-Sleeping Mama to my Boy Bean , born 9/30/09!
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Old 09-18-2009, 01:09 PM
 
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I did hypnobirthing last time, and it helped, but it wasn't a saving grace. With that in mind, I've listened to hypnobabies as one of many tools I have to help me through labor. I'm not killing myself and devoting every second of my life to it. I listen to scripts usually when I go to bed or lay down for a nap. They usually relax me, but sometimes they annoy me, too. Who knows if I will even end up using it in labor?
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Old 09-18-2009, 01:13 PM
 
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I listen pretty much everyday, but usually to put me to sleep! I think it will help, but I'm not expecting miracles. It's helped me sleep so much better, that alone was worth it.

I haven't done any of the practicing - I only remember to when something actually starts to hurt! But it does have some effect then, so that's a good sign.

Wife to the man I never expected, DS born at home '07, '08, baby girl born at home Oct '09!
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Old 09-18-2009, 01:43 PM
 
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This will be my second Hypnobabies birth. I'm feeling pretty prepared, although I haven't been as loyal with my listening as last time around. It's come back pretty easily, though.

Last time I really did have a painfree labor. (I chose to stop using it during pushing, so there were 11 minutes of pain in there, but I'm okay with that. ) All I felt was pressure. In case it helps reassure anybody else, here are some of the ways I deviated from the program directions last time, and it still worked wonderfully:

--DH never practiced anything. He never read anything. He didn't read any scripts to me, in labor or otherwise. He had no idea of the "relax" cue or whatever other cues partners are supposed to use. Neither he nor anyone else cued me in any way. (It wasn't that he wasn't supportive/didn't care/wasn't willing to put in the effort. It was just that we knew from ds's birth that I don't want to be touched or talked to during labor, so his learning the program would have been pretty pointless, unless we wanted to rent him out to other moms. )

--I listened to the affirmations cd maybe 2 times throughout pregnancy. Maybe.

--I did the fear release once. The next day, I felt rather freaked out and anxious, so I decided not to do that script any more.

--I barely practiced the fingerdrops, other than during CD scripts. I didn't actually use them during labor, either. During labor, I listened to the birth guide CD and used the "peace" cue. (Interestingly, this time I find myself practicing fingerdrops more often. Still nowhere near 5 times a day, but it just feels right to use them more often. I wonder if I'll find myself using them during this labor?)

--I didn't try to avoid hearing about/using the words contraction/pain during pregnancy or labor. I don't really get the idea of avoiding the word contraction, because to me, contraction means there are muscles contracting. It doesn't mean it has to be painful. In terms of using/hearing "pain," I just bought into the program enough that my mental response to seeing birth shows or whatever was to think, "Eh, doesn't apply to me. I'm not going to have pain." Obviously, that can be tricky to talk your mind into, but I just kind of figured that I might as well go at it from that point of view. I mean, I spent pregnancy with ds1 expecting labor to be painful, and it didn't make the experience any more manageable, so I figured it was worth a shot to assume the hypnosis would work.

--I don't remember thinking at all about my "special safe place" during labor. Of course, that might have been because my special place was my living room and I labored in, well, my living room. Not much point in visualizing it, you know?

--This didn't actually go against the program directions (quite the opposite), but I want to offer more reassurance on this, because it happens to so many Hypnomoms: Almost all my practice sessions started at bedtime, and I slept through 95% or so of my cds. Totally okay. In fact, I somehow missed the section of the workbook about the "peace" cue and only read about it in passing on the yahoo group. I was worried, because I had never been awake for the instructions for it on the cds. I remember trying it out and being shocked that I immediately felt the effects of the hypnosis. Even though I had no clue about it consciously, my subconscious really had learned how to do it. And it ended up being one of my biggest tools during labor.

I think the biggest hurdle for many moms is deciding to use the hypnosis during labor, and starting it early enough. In a lot of birth stories I've read where it wasn't terribly effective, it sounds like the mom held off on using it until things started to get unmanageable without it (treating it like you would getting an epidural or something). At that point, it can be hard to get deeply into hypnosis. If it's used from early on, you have lots of time to deepen it. I used the peace cue at each contraction shortly after labor started, and added the birth guide cd as labor intensified. (Of course, in my case, this was all fairly close together, since dd was born 3 hours after the first contraction. )

I'm looking forward to reading lots of wonderful Hypnobabies birth stories in the next couple of months!

Lisa , mom to Isaac (9/1/03), Violet (6/19/06), Simon (10/9/09); wife to Eric ; handservant to Grace :
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Old 09-18-2009, 04:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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TortelliniMama, that's really very reassuring. Thanks for sharing! And, Aunti Liz, your post was really comforting to me, too. I've experienced almost every single thing you described. For the record, I have to use the word "Release" instead of "Relax". It just makes more sense to my body anyway and cues a physical release of whatever muscles were still tight.

Good to know about partners not needing to be so diligent in the practicing. My husband tries...but I have to say it doesn't seem natural. Once he ended up poking me in the eye while hypnotized because he was trying to hold the script, read, and put his hand on my forehead all at once. Another time...after the finger drop, he asked me if we should let the dog in. I had to come out of hypnosis to inform him that I can't be answering questions! Ha!

Like a PP said, it helps me sleep which, even if not helpful in labor, is a huge bonus right now! And for being a typically nervous and anxious person, it feels really good to tell people that, no, I am not nervous, when they ask if I am. I don't know how it will serve me during my "birthing time" but I really don't feel nervous!

Can't wait to hear the hypno-stories!
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Old 09-18-2009, 05:41 PM
 
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I'm so happy to see this thread! It's really reassuring. I've been feeling not very confident about HB lately because I've gotten kind of nervous about the birth in the last couple of weeks. I'm starting to second-guess whether I've practiced enough to make it work.

Also I tend to get really fidgety when in the OFF position for so long during the scripts, so I have to keep switching to Center and then back to OFF again. I feel like it distracts me. So sometimes I just do the scripts while in the Center position the whole time; hopefully that doesn't ruin anything?

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about the pain of my last labor. I'm afraid that if I can't stop thinking about it, there's no way I'm going to be comfortable because my mind will be set on it hurting. But I can't stop thinking about all my fears (even after doing the fear-release session a couple of times).

Wife to J. Mama to DD(3yo) & DS(1yo)
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Old 09-18-2009, 07:39 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maela View Post
Lately, I've been thinking a lot about the pain of my last labor. I'm afraid that if I can't stop thinking about it, there's no way I'm going to be comfortable because my mind will be set on it hurting. But I can't stop thinking about all my fears (even after doing the fear-release session a couple of times).
Maybe it would help to give your mind another way to expect to experience labor, so I'll offer (yet more ) more detail about what my Hypnobabies labor was like. As far as I know, this isn't mentioned in the program, although for all I know it's on a bunch of the cds and I was just never awake when it was said.

Anyway, during contractions, I could actually sense the potential for pain. It was like, hmm...I think the best way I can describe it is looking at a bright light while wearing sunglasses. You know how you can tell, "Boy, that's a bright light! It would probably really hurt if I looked at it without these sunglasses!", even though the amount of light reaching your eyes isn't actually that strong in absolute terms and even though it's not actually hurting you. That was how it was for me during labor. I could kind of compare the contractions with the contractions I had during my first (non-hypno) labor, and I could tell that they were the same physical experience, and I could tell that they'd be hurting without the hypnosis. I remember thinking, "Boy, this would really hurt if I'd let it! But why would I let it?" And I honestly didn't perceive it as painful.

So, since expectations can be so powerful, maybe it'll help you to expect to sense that there's that pain "available" to you, but also expect that you'll just be able to choose not to experience it.

And, for anyone who hasn't joined the yahoo Hypnobabies group, I'd really encourage you to do so. There are so many moms with tons of tips and suggestions and Hypnobabies experiences on there, and they're very eager to help people figure out ways to make the program work for them.

Lisa , mom to Isaac (9/1/03), Violet (6/19/06), Simon (10/9/09); wife to Eric ; handservant to Grace :
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Old 09-18-2009, 07:47 PM
 
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I had a pain free birth with my son in 2007. Graphic story follows. That said, I still "worry" that I'll lose it this time around.










On Wed. morning, I woke up around 6:30 am to some cramps and having to pee. I thought I had a stomach bug or something too, since I had diarrhea the day before. The thought of impending labor never crossed my mind since I had gone to almost 43 weeks with Bella, and here I was not quite 37 weeks. Curiosity had gotten the better of me a few days before, and I tried to check my cervix but was unable to reach it. Intuitively, I had known all along that I wouldn’t make it to March, but after going so “late” with Bella, I didn’t want to allow that thought into my mind. So, at 6:30, I get out of bed to pee, knowing that my odds were not good being in a house with 5 people and 1 bathroom. Sure enough, it was occupied, so I folded my robe up and sat on it to pee. I put it in the hamper with our dirty diapers, and got back into bed. As I get back into bed, I notice my leg pillow is slightly wet and wonder if I should call Eric and tell him my water is leaking, but I decide against it. I would feel silly calling him if I had only peed myself, so I decide not to, fully expecting to have another 3-4 weeks of pregnancy. I put on my hypnobabies tracks that I was supposed to listen to that day, since they always put me right to sleep. Around 6:45, I wake up, having to pee again. Walking to the bathroom, it seems as though I have lost control of my bladder, as I feel liquid trickle down my leg. I get into the bathroom, and the trickle is red. Hmm. I guess my water did break. The thought of labor crosses my mind as a REAL possibility for the first time. I go out to the living room, and tell my mom to call Eric and have him come home since my water broke. I’m still feeling crampy, and although I never timed my contractions, I wondered if there was a pattern, and if they were getting longer/stronger/closer together. Figuring I have a LONG way to go, I start a bath around 7am. I call my dad (Bella’s support person), and my midwife. Bella wakes up, and my mom gets her and brings her into the bathroom. She decides to get in with me. I worry she’ll want to nurse, and I don’t want to, but she doesn’t. I start to feel nauseous, and feel like I have to poop. I hop on the toilet, have diarrhea again, and then go into my bedroom. I only make it to the foot of my bed before a contraction comes and the pressure is killing my lower back. They start coming one on top of another, so I kneel at the foot of the bed and lean on it with my upper body. I breathe heavily and try to use my hypno-cues, but the intensity is scaring me and I can’t quite get a hold of myself. I feel like I’m going to puke, so I ask my mom (now in the bathroom tending to my bathing 2 year old for a bowl. I end up grabbing a trashcan that is behind me and as I vomit, I realize I’m pooping again. I momentarily feel bad that someone is going to have to clean up my adult feces, but quickly get over it as the next wave of contractions come. I wonder if I could be in transition, and pray that’s what it is, because I don’t feel any control whatsoever, and am intimidated by the power I feel. The pressure is insane, and while I’m making some noises, I don’t know that I can say I was ever in PAIN, but I was profoundly uncomfortable, and could not find a position that felt good. I tell my mom we’re going to the hospital. Part of me wants to tune out with an epidural like I did with Bella, and part of me is afraid for his lungs being slightly under 37 weeks. I realize I would just be pissed off to get to the hospital only to not have time for drugs. Around 7:45 am Eric gets home and started using hypno-cues, applying pressure to my back and encouraging me. I told him “I don’t want to”, and he continues to say all the right things. I get my mom to put on my birth guide CD, remembering that I have to choose to use my hypno-training. It starts to help, and I get my switch to center and feel much more comfortable. Then the CD starts skipping. (I was supposed to listen to it at 37 weeks to make sure it worked, but hadn’t gotten there yet). I tell him to make it shut up, and after the next contraction I go to the tub. It’s now about 8:15. I turn on the water and hand held shower head. I hand him the shower and he puts it on my back. I’m on hands and knees again, and my wrists are starting to get tired. I’m totally relaxed and comfortable, with no pain for the next 15 minutes. I then start to feel a lot of pressure and stretching with each contraction. Then this loud unearthly noise is coming from somewhere. I realize it’s me and think to myself, I must be pushing. That low cavewoman type Tarzan bellow comes out of me with each contraction. I never consciously push; my body just does it all. I reach down and feel his head. I holler for no one to touch me, and while my mom says no one is, I know they were, and she continued to for about 30 more seconds. The head is out; I continue bellowing and pushing and then he is out. It is 8:42 am. I look back, and my midwife is here. She has the biggest smile on her face. She apparently got here just after the head was out, and undid his double nuchal cord just in time for his body to slip out. She helps me sit back and hold him. He has trouble breathing. She gives him a few breaths and some oxygen to get him started. He is bright red and grunty for the next 18 hours. We get me to the bed, and I feel pushy, so we try to deliver the placenta, but it’s not ready. I’m hot and nauseous, and although we were planning a lotus birth, he is so cold and needing so much warming that I ask to cut the cord so they can take him aside and warm him up. They do, and they open a window for me so I cool down. At 9:45 I deliver the placenta, and Eric and the midwife go to the living room to keep him happy. I start to black out. I see stars, and call for K. She comes in and looks at me and says… Pitocin? I say I don’t feel so good… and then go blank. They ask me to open my eyes, and I do, in time to see her jab me with a needle in my thigh. Almost 2 hours go by before I feel strong enough to hold my baby, and while I feel somewhat remorseful about missing that time, I know he was being held and loved by my dad and my husband, and being well cared for. K asks to supplement with some sugar water, hoping that will help with the gruntiness. I tell them where the finger feeder is, and it does help quite a bit. We supplement for the next 24 hours or so. His breathing is always better when nursing, and I’m able to give him supplement at the same time. My milk was in by 48 hours, and he nurses really well. I had a breast reduction a year before my daughter was born, and had to supplement with formula. I really hope to be able to provide for all of his nutritive needs. He is peeing and pooping just like the books say he should, and that makes me feel soooo good. I’m taking fenugreek, which helped a lot with my daughter as well. My sister had my daughter for most of the time. They played in the living room until I started bellowing. Bella got concerned and asked what was wrong. My sister told her “mommy’s just singing a song”, and they start singing with me. They play in the hallway for a while, and tell the midwives which door to go in (apartment). About 15 minutes after he is born, Bella comes in to sit on her daddy’s lap in the bathroom. Everything was as it should be. I was dropped by a CNM at 30 weeks for a message I posted on a discussion board, and I know that was a godsend. I’m sure we would have ended up with a hospital transfer because of his breathing, and he would have been hooked up in the NICU with spinal taps and IV’s and all. I’m also very grateful we planned a homebirth, because I don’t think we would have made it anywhere anyway. I can’t say enough about my midwives. Their presence and professionalism and knowledge and kindness were so perfect. The whole thing was perfect. The only thing I would change is my mother not keeping her hands to herself. Looking back, I’m still not sure if I had a quick labor, or because of hypnobabies was deep in hypnosis for the early stage.
Evander McIver 7/21/07, 8lbs 6 oz, 20.5 inches.

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Old 09-18-2009, 07:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hang in there Maela,
Remember, "this is a new birth". Not sure if that affirmation from the CD has been helpful to you. But I've read lots of stories of 2nd time moms who used HB's to correct the trauma of their first births. Are you on the Yahoo Group and did you see the email they sent out with the Dateline Episode that followed two mothers using hypnosis? It was neat to see the one mother who had been previously tramatized who then had a nice birth. It CAN happen. It WILL happen!
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Old 09-19-2009, 02:47 AM
 
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TortelliniMama and Friendlee, thanks for the advice. I do need to join the yahoo group. The "this is a new birth" affirmation does make me feel better every time I hear it. maybe I should post it in my bedroom somewhere...

mysticmomma, I loved reading your story! Thank you!



It's weird because I've been kind of dreading labor lately; and then this evening there was about a 30 minute window of time (just an hour after listening to the "easy, comfortable childbirth" script ) where I thought I might be going into labor and I was SO excited! Very disappointed when the pressure waves stopped. So that also made me feel a little better about everything. It was Dh who was kind of freaking out and happy that it wasn't time. He said he wasn't ready yet.

Wife to J. Mama to DD(3yo) & DS(1yo)
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Old 09-20-2009, 01:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So, while my husband and I were at the dog park yesterday I started chatting with a woman who asked if I'd "learned the word epidural yet?" I immediately started chanting 'Bubble of Peace' to myself and smiled and nodded yes. I wasn't about to tell her about Hypnobabie...she was the type of woman who'd tell me I was being silly and to stop dreaming. She went on to tell me how her first birth was natural (and awful) and she didn't want to look at the baby after it came out. And how her second birth with an epidural was wonderful - that that time she was excited to be a mother and thought the baby was so pretty because she was in such a painless state.

It was tough, I'll admit. I know that if this woman had known how dedicated I have been to changing my ideas about birth and if she had read all that I've read or seen all that I've seen, she'd feel awful for speaking this way about my upcoming experience. No ill intention on her part. But it is fascinating how different people's experiences can be. Experiences that are so simply based on their current knowledge of their bodies and their understanding of different possibilities. Knowledge is power!
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Old 09-21-2009, 11:58 AM
 
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I appreciate all these posts, but especially Tortollinimamma! I think what I've done has been about the same as what you did, so it's great to hear it worked for you!

I prefer "release" to the finger drop, too, but to be honest the whole light switch thing often bugs me. I think I will probably end up using "Peace" mostly. I find that imagining the light switch distracts me and I end up feeling like it's a very sticky switch or defective or something and I have to "try" several times to flip it off. And then sometimes I completely forget about it after a while and scratch my nose or something without going to "center" on the stupid switch! I've realized lately, though, I have changed my visualization of the switch and now see it as yanking some portion of my spine out, which sounds awful, but helps me with the whole "your muscles are totally cut off from your brain" idea.

And I forgot to mention in my previous post, DH hasn't done a thing with hypnobabies, either. I told him maybe he'd like to read the intro or something, but while he didn't refuse, it obviously wasn't something he wanted to do and he hasn't. I'm a little skeptical myself and I feel like it's easier for me to deal with my skepticism if hypnobabies is all my own thing in my own mind and I don't have to think about anyone else "knowing" what I'm thinking/doing or worrying about what they are thinking about it.

Wife to the man I never expected, DS born at home '07, '08, baby girl born at home Oct '09!
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Old 09-21-2009, 05:32 PM
 
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I haven't been on MDC much in the past few months, honestly, but decided to check in today, and I'm glad I did! I've been doing the home study HypnoBabies course, and I can't say enough how helpful this thread has been!

I've been having some issues with the word "Relax" as well, and now mentally just hear "Release" instead. It seems to help a great deal. I've had a few HypnoBirth babies before, so the HypnoBabies program is building on that for me, and has meant some changes to both my current programming and the wording here and there for the HypnoBabies stuff too.

I've found, for some reason, that I'm much more open to the idea of a "new baby, new experience" this time, too. I'm not so worried I'll have a repeat of the less ideal parts of past births, and am much more able to just trust in what I'm learning, and practicing. My husband hasn't been able to practice much with me (finding time to practice is a chore in and of itself, with 2 kids in elementary school and 3 still at home), but is very supportive and has a great deal of faith in me, my body, and whatever I choose for labor. He knows me well enough to know when I decide something's going to work, it WILL.

Thankyou, MysticMama, for your story. I'm looking forward to reading more of everyone's stories here, just for the positive stories. Since I'm not due until the very end of the month here, I should get to read most of them before it's my turn!
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Old 10-26-2009, 09:24 AM
 
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i know not all of us have babies out yet, but i figure some of us do. how did it go??

i don't know how much i even consciously used the hypnobabies cues in my labor, but i do know it was a MUCH better labor than my son's. it was a lot faster - i wasn't sure i was in labor until around 9 am and she was born at 1 pm. and, while it wasn't pain-free, i never felt out of control or even really upset through the whole first stage. i didn't throw up (i did at transition with my son) and i can hardly even believe i DID transition.

pushing was another story. i think i didn't pay much attention to the pushing stuff with hypnobabies because with my son i remember the pain just vanishing when i started to push and my whole memory of pushing was that it was pretty easy and short. this time it was still pretty short (i think less than 30 min) but really miserable for me - i felt like i had to push much harder and also the contractions stayed really painful. she was a much bigger baby (almost 9 lbs), though.

i had no tearing at all, though!! and my recovery so far has been great. (2 weeks tomorrow).

Wife to the man I never expected, DS born at home '07, '08, baby girl born at home Oct '09!
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