Official Hospital ban on kids... - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-25-2009, 09:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, I got word yesterday that the hospital has declared a ban on kids under 18 as visitors. (because of swine flu)
That means DD will not get to come see her baby sister right away! I'm so sad! I wanted her to be there for the labor and then come right in after she's born.

Deb

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Old 10-25-2009, 10:57 AM
 
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Huh? Even siblings? That's so sad...
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Old 10-25-2009, 11:02 AM
 
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I'm so sorry. I fear the same thing will happen here.
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Old 10-25-2009, 11:29 AM
 
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When we had SARS here they were only allowing one person in the hospital with them Mom check in to check out. NO kids as well.

Mommy to Petunia 11/04 Bug 10/06 Button 11/09 and  Sweetie pea 12/11 DW to J :

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Old 10-25-2009, 11:56 AM
 
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A LOT of hospitals are doing this to try to slow the spread of H1N1, especially among vulnerable newborns. Try to think of the time in the hospital as quiet bonding time for you, your partner and your LO. Perhaps the person(s) watching your DD can help her bake a special treat or make a card or do something else special to prepare for the baby's homecoming.
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Old 10-25-2009, 01:31 PM
 
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I'm so sorry, I would be really upset too. For me it is important for my older children to be there when the baby comes. Maybe you can find some other way to keep her involved since she can't go?
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Old 10-25-2009, 05:30 PM
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One of my best friends is in the unfortunate position of her husband not being able to be there now. Where they are it's next to impossible to have people lined up around the clock who can drop everything to stay with their kids so he can go So she has to deliver alone now, and this angers me.

There are so many things kids can have, and it's not just kids who get/have swine flu either. Adults get it too, so why not ban everyone but the mother if they want to be truly as "safe" as possible? Instead what they're doing is dividing families.
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Old 10-25-2009, 05:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know I'm lucky that my friends are going to take her whenever we have to go. But we had planned on having them come closer to the time of delivery so she could be there right after.
It does seem silly, anyone could be sick and just come in (if they're adults) but DD has already had the flu and cannot come.
My thought is that siblings would be right in the room with the family and when the Mom and baby go home, they would be there anyway.

OT
I was at the store today and there was a kid sitting on the floor waiting for his Mom (looking at clothes) and coughing all over the place, huge, hacking coughs!

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Old 10-25-2009, 08:09 PM
 
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Just last week our hospital decided on a no visitors policy for the OB patients - only your spouse or partner... even for patients with a doula! No other visitors at all! I feel it is a good policy to help limit the amount of germs the babies are exposed to, but I feel that doulas play an important role and should be welcomed as part of the birth team. I am really sad that my boys won't be able to visit me, so I'm deciding to leave after one night instead of two.

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Old 10-25-2009, 09:23 PM
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Sara, the trade-off to not even allowing thers in the room with the mother is that some women NEED the support. So cut the support that may be vital to cut the risk of germs. This is not okay. If a hospital were to tell me only my fiance could be there and not his mother (who is important to me to have there, wherever delivery happens), hell would break loose. This is a very difficult, emotional time. Where do they get off telling women, "Too bad you can't have the support you need, only us doctors and nurses"?
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Old 10-25-2009, 09:37 PM
 
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I was discussing this on another forum.... this wouldn't have bothered me at all. I was in the hospital each time less than 14 hours. The sibling reunions take place in my own bed. No drama.

Also, I have a long standing, personal policy of NOT visiting moms and babes in hospitals. I may be very healthy but I do not want to inadvertently bring you a terrible germ.
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Old 10-25-2009, 09:55 PM
 
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That really sucks. I need to ask if this will be the case for us when I go in for an appt tomorrow, nothing has been said to me about it thus far and I'm at the hospital for NST's twice a week. I really hope not, considering that if dd isn't welcome in the delivery room and I go into labor before MIL comes in on the 17th then dh will have no choice but to stay home with her and I will have to deliver alone. Not exactly what I had in mind.
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Old 10-25-2009, 09:57 PM
 
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I have a similar thing here, but my OB's office is in a wing of the hospital and so is the US place. We have one child at least with us 24/7 and no child care..

So I wont even have DH at any of the appointments of USs we will have or need.
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Old 10-25-2009, 10:53 PM
 
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Yeah they are doing that here too. No children visitors (under 18) at all. They are hoping to help keep the kids from contracting/spreading things.

Denyel & Kate Bond - Black Belt Mamas to Dekaylee born 10/29/09 - And parents to our 4-legged family including 1 Dog "Hank", 2 cats "Boris & Ahmi", and 5 Beautiful Alpacas!!
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Old 10-25-2009, 11:13 PM
 
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If it's any consolation, I was 8 when my sister was born. I was only allowed see her in her bassinet through a glass window (think every movie you ever saw!), until they were discharged at 5 days (standard practice, there were no health issues). It didn't scar me, and didn't stop us bonding.
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Old 10-26-2009, 03:45 AM
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Originally Posted by deny_zoo29 View Post
Yeah they are doing that here too. No children visitors (under 18) at all. They are hoping to help keep the kids from contracting/spreading things.
Adults are just as capable of contracting and spreading things as kids. Hospitals in general are pretty germy to begin with.
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Old 10-26-2009, 04:26 AM
 
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i havent heard if my hospital is doing the same but they cant MAKE me leave him in the car =-) oh no we have no family to watch him LOL

Jen loveing Wifey to my Hubby Jeremy Mommy to Austin David and KayLeigh marie
i love my life!!!
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Old 10-26-2009, 04:32 AM
 
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not from your DDC but saw the topic...
I am due in April. I am a single mama and I have a 3yr old. My closest friend who could babysit for me is 4 hours away. I LITERALLY have no one to help me. I tried posting an ad on CL for a babysitter, but everyone who emailed me flaked.
This REALLY effects me as I was planning on her being at the hospital with me with the help of a PP doula who was training with my birth doula.
NOW the hospital I am delivering at is saying one person can come in with the patient and they can't leave till the patient leaves, WELL my doula has a BF baby at home and can NOT be away for 1-2 days(possibly more?).
This is so messed up and I am PO'd. I wanted my DD to help cut the cord. Praying this will blow over by April...

no circ/vax-babywearer-cosleeping-pumping/breastfeeding-homeschooling single mama to Junebug , Sugarbug and expecting
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Old 10-26-2009, 10:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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That's a tough spot erickalynne! Hopefully by April they will lift it!

As far as I know, they are not limiting other visitors here, only kids. And I agree, there are some people that are really vital for support for the mother. My DH and I? Long story but he will be there and he is really not my support for labor, we have other issues.

I know other women are fine leaving the hospital after a few hours or a very short time but so far after 3 kids, I have not been able to leave after that short a time due to one thing or another. Maybe it would be ok this time but I already know not to count on it so I need to have a plan in place.

I've told Madeleine now and she seems to be fine with it, I guess it's more me regretting it. We watched births and talked about them and she was looking forward to it and I wanted to share it with her.

Deb

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Old 10-26-2009, 10:59 AM
 
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Originally Posted by shakenbake View Post
i havent heard if my hospital is doing the same but they cant MAKE me leave him in the car =-) oh no we have no family to watch him LOL

No, but if you have to be admitted, and the child can't go with you, and you have no one to leave him with, they could call CPS for temporary care.
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Old 10-26-2009, 11:06 AM
 
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Our hospital too. No kids under 18 and not more than 2 visitors at a time. I hope that doesn't include DH.

Kerri, mom to Doran  angel2.gif  (born still 7/6/05 at 33 weeks), Mairaed (11/16/07),  angel1.gif 11/15/08 at 10 weeks,  Kieran (11/2/09).   angel1.gif 1/11/11 at 15 weeks
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Old 10-26-2009, 03:03 PM
 
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That's insane! The whole thing. It makes me SO angry. It's the FLU, not AIDS or the killer plague for cripes sake! And making an arbitrary "rule" that kids under 18 are banned, period, is just discrimination. Not to mention overkill. Why not, and I know this is going to sound crazy....put a ban on people exhibiting FLU SYMPTOMS from the hospital, regardless of age?

Just one more reason to stay away from the hospital if at all possible.
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Old 10-26-2009, 04:02 PM
 
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Interesting point I'll add to this. The city where my mom lives in Michigan has been closing their schools over the past month and the kids have figured it out how to get it done. If a certain number of parents call in that their kid is sick with flu like symptoms or enough kids go to the office/nurse to complain about flu like symptoms then they close the school for 3-5 days to "disinfect" and clean the school and give these kids time to get better. Well one school in particular has been closed more than it has been open in the past month because of this. The kids are working the system!
Seems to me they need a better system at the schools and the hospitals.

Denyel & Kate Bond - Black Belt Mamas to Dekaylee born 10/29/09 - And parents to our 4-legged family including 1 Dog "Hank", 2 cats "Boris & Ahmi", and 5 Beautiful Alpacas!!
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Old 10-26-2009, 05:21 PM
 
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That's insane! The whole thing. It makes me SO angry. It's the FLU, not AIDS or the killer plague for cripes sake! And making an arbitrary "rule" that kids under 18 are banned, period, is just discrimination. Not to mention overkill. Why not, and I know this is going to sound crazy....put a ban on people exhibiting FLU SYMPTOMS from the hospital, regardless of age?

Just one more reason to stay away from the hospital if at all possible.
You can shed the virus for 24 hours before exhibiting any symptoms. So just prohibiting people with flu symptoms would still leave a huge gap in a hospital's efforts to protect mamas and new babies. Hospitals are also likely concerned about the liability potential - in their mind, they're probably better off having some pissed off patients because of limited visitors than they are being sued because a newborn caught H1N1 at the hospital and died.

But I do agree with you on one point - it's just another reason to stay away from the hospital if possible.
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Old 10-26-2009, 08:18 PM
 
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ya i wont let them do that LOL my doc told me he can be in the room with me no matter what!

Jen loveing Wifey to my Hubby Jeremy Mommy to Austin David and KayLeigh marie
i love my life!!!
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Old 10-27-2009, 12:34 PM
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NOW the hospital I am delivering at is saying one person can come in with the patient and they can't leave till the patient leaves,
WTF? Seriously, just WTF. They can not legally force someone to stay without a court order, regardless of their policy. If you want to get technical about it, if the bar someone from leaving (they can require the baby stay, but a support-adult), then it is legally abduction and/or false imprisonment, depending on how a prosecutor would push it. Whichever way, it is illegal. f they say a person has to stay and don't try blocking that person's exit and the person stays, then that's legal.

So if they hold your doula against her will, sue them.
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Old 10-27-2009, 12:37 PM
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Interesting point I'll add to this. The city where my mom lives in Michigan has been closing their schools over the past month and the kids have figured it out how to get it done. If a certain number of parents call in that their kid is sick with flu like symptoms or enough kids go to the office/nurse to complain about flu like symptoms then they close the school for 3-5 days to "disinfect" and clean the school and give these kids time to get better. Well one school in particular has been closed more than it has been open in the past month because of this. The kids are working the system!
Seems to me they need a better system at the schools and the hospitals.
Better system? How about not freaking over a minor illness? There's literally a higher chance of being murdered than dying of the swine flu. I looked up the stats.

The schools there should do what mine did - every school day closed was one more tacked on going into summer. If the kids didn't get out of it altogether, they might think differently about cutting into vacation.

I think this burns me a bit because I was genuinely ill a lot during scool and often lied about feeling WELL so I could go instead of have to stay home.
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Old 10-27-2009, 12:42 PM
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You can shed the virus for 24 hours before exhibiting any symptoms. So just prohibiting people with flu symptoms would still leave a huge gap in a hospital's efforts to protect mamas and new babies. Hospitals are also likely concerned about the liability potential - in their mind, they're probably better off having some pissed off patients because of limited visitors than they are being sued because a newborn caught H1N1 at the hospital and died.
But...what about ADULTS? Adults between 20 and 45 are statistically most likely to die, and the majority of cases so far have been in adults in this age group. Simply banning kids is putting a finger in the hole in the dam's wall when it's spilling over the top. You stop it from getting in one minor way while overlooking that there's another way.

Also hospitals are really not known for being the cleanest of places as it is. Why not ban shoes, for instance? You can't make an entire hospital sterile. You just can't. And stressing out people who NEED support by denying them their support is NOT going to help. Believe me on personal experience. The hospitals I've been in have learned they MUST bend the rules or else my vitals go nuts and they're are risk.

They need to stop with these stupid blanket policies.
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Old 10-27-2009, 12:44 PM
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No, but if you have to be admitted, and the child can't go with you, and you have no one to leave him with, they could call CPS for temporary care.
You hand your kid to CPS and good luck getting the kid right back. CPS can not just hand a child back. They're required to do a full investigation on parents who hand their kids over (not saying they always follow the rules, because they don't). She may as well kiss her child good-bye for a while. The best they MIGHT be able to do is suggest a babysitter, but no guarantee that babysitter will be available on a moment's notice.
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Old 10-27-2009, 07:08 PM
 
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Well here you can sign your kids over, and get them back with 24 hours notice.
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