i'm starting to feel a little better, ya.
my dh had to go right back to work the day of delivery. well, he did stay for the morning but went in to work at night, so my dh hasn't had any time to really stay home and help out(and no family to help either). the worst part was just being in the hospital though. my dh did get to have a long thanksgiving weekend however, so that was nice, plus the previous weekends after delivery.
my babe sleeps okay so far, i don't sleep so well but oh well. i get really frustrated sometimes and end up taking it out on my husband... which i feel bad for but it just keeps happening. the lack of real sleep just has me totally drained. while i'm up in the middle of the night off and on numerous times, i look over and he is out like a light, getting uninterrupted sleep every night as my eyes are on fire and my body drained. i keep having to remind myself that he works and i'm staying home, and i have chances to take naps with the baby, whereas my husband does not have any chance to take naps throughout the day. i don't end up taking naps though... but still, i could, and i really shouldn't be taking it out on him, he is really sweet and supportive.
i am still bleeding. i'm tired of feeling not so fresh down there, and the itching is crazy. i'm able to take a shower almost every day, or closer to night though when the baby is taking his 'long nap', which is a good 2/3 hours, it gives me time to do some cleaning or cooking and then a hot shower.
hmm... i'm really lonely though. not much to do here. i end up doing some small things when the baby takes his short naps, and then proceed with routine. feed, change, put back to sleep, and so on, which normally consists of me doing that while watching a movie.
i'm not really ready to take him out into the real world just yet, aside from the pediatrician. i really need to go to the store but i'm conflicted with not feeling ready yet really needing to go there. plus there are other things i desperately need to do but there is just no way i feel ready to take him with me, so... this where i am at so far. hopefully this will change soon and i'll be a little more comfortable.
he's here; kaine (11/9/09)