So tired of talking about my "due date" - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 03:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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So is anyone else so annoyed by people asking about their due date or how many days/weeks left? I've had so many people over the past week ask me something like "so, are you still set for the 15th?". I am so tired of explaining that the EDD means practically nothing except that it is 280 days from the first day of my last period. Anymore, I just reply "well, the 15th is my due date" or a "yup" depending on my mood. I don't know why that annoys me so much but it does. Haven't any of these people known anyone that has had a baby before? My uterus is not a time bomb that is going to go off on the 15th. And what, like 2% of babies are born on their due dates? Maybe it's just the culture of so many scheduled inductions and c-sections these days that someone that actually waits to go into labor is the exception. I don't know but I'm just tired of talking to people about it. LOL

freethinking mom to DD 4/2006 and DS 1/2010
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#2 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 03:30 AM
 
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I actually refused to give a Due Date this time. Only said mid January. It worked pretty well. I hate the last three weeks when everyone keeps calling about the EDD.

Any misspellings or grammatical errors in the above statement are intentional;
they are placed there for the amusement of those who like to point them out.
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#3 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 03:54 AM
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I post on my facebook page what week I am in, and give a range to baby time, like now at 36 weeks, I could give birth between 1-6 weeks. Some people have asked why the range and I answer that hte EDD is just an estimate, it's reasonable to assume he'll show up in the range. Hopefully that will prevent the is he here yet questions.

Deadra, Wife to Adam , Mama to Beatrix (02/08), Hudson (01/10), and Mazarine (12/13)
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#4 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 08:47 AM
 
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so with you on this!

except it's slightly different for me. most folks in my life remember that it's january, but not when in january, so they keep saying "any day now!" and then act shocked when i say, "nope, it's still a few weeks away"

i've started to just agree with whatever people say. makes my life easier. yup, anyday. yup, i've dropped a ton. yup, i haven't dropped at all. yup, i must be having twins/triplets/a litter. yup, i don't even look like i'm 9 months pregnant.


i swear i will never say anything other than "you look wonderful, i'm so happy for you" to pregnant women in the future.

mom to Andrew   born Feb 6th, already a mom to child with fur; and still missing and still wondering about the lost possibilities Mar 17, 2009
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#5 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 10:24 AM
 
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Try going past your "dates" and then see how people react. This is my second pregnancy and second time I'm past my EDD. It's horrible because starting at 38 weeks people start saying things like "any day now!" and then once you go past, despite reminding myself and them that EDD are estimations, people ask when I'll be induced, etc etc etc.

HOrribly annoying.

My babies were born at home! 09/07, 01/10, and 09/12 joy.gif

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#6 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 10:28 AM
 
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Oh yes. Try being pregnant with twins and everyone and their brother thinks that twins always come early. People are actually starting to ask me if something is wrong because I haven't had them yet. *sigh*

to you mama. Some people can be so annoying!

Three boys.  jumpers.gif
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#7 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 10:40 AM
 
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Yeah, it gets old fast, and feels more and more artificial the closer it gets. I didn't have DD on her EDD! I have been saying "the end of the month" or "in the next couple of weeks."

Lauren (33), writer, recovering academic, WOHM to a highly sensitive child (Robin, Feb '08) and mellow little Holly (Jan '10). Newly diagnosed Bipolar I. rolleyes.gif
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#8 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 11:13 AM
 
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i find it annoying this time. Not sure why it's bugging me so, just feels really contrived and artificial maybe? Feels like everyone's expectations are on the table? Haven't figured it out yet. I got so annoyed with my dearest friend of twenty some years last week when she was going on and on about "only X days left, when do you think it will happen?" AFter giving my "babies come on their birthdays" line, I quickly said a bit about how end of pregnancies sure seem to trigger other people's control issues. We talked about that for a bit and she ended up totally agreeing with me (and it wasn't fear-based!LOL). But I do think that in a time where so much is managed and controlled that "due dates" get lumped in.

In the meantime, geesh peeps, my baby will come when it comes. This month for sure ;-)
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#9 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 11:48 AM
 
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SOOOOOOOo hear you! I have asked my parents to be ready and available for the call to come look after our DS for about a week, and my mom just told me "OK, I booked that week off work" - I said "But mom, I have no way of knowing when I will give birth, could be ANYTIME in January". And her response was "Don't tell me that! I told my boss she could have the previous week off work!"

ARG!
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#10 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 11:59 AM
 
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I belong to several more "natural" birthing groups & I have really only gotten good comments on how we are waiting until the baby is ready, etc. I hope I don't get the other type of comments...

A doula who married a cop & became a mama to 3 boys: G 12/22/00, my rainbow baby B 2/2/07 and L 2/10/10 my CBA2V baby, waiting for my little caboose late February 2013 & always remembering my two angels 2006 & 2012.

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#11 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 01:11 PM
 
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This is the play by play of my conversations with people who think EDDs are days set in stone:

them: "when are you due?"
me: "this month"
Them: "yes but what day?"
me: "today would be nice"
them: "sigh... but what day did your doctor tell you?"
me: "I don't have a dr. And it really depends on the what the baby decides rather than a dr, don't you think?"
them: "whatever"
me: *smirk*

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#12 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 01:14 PM
 
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I've been getting this a lot from people lately too! I'm about 39 1/2 weeks and everyone swore I'd go early...no such luck! It just sets up emotional expectations when people say it all the time!! So, I've started sending people to this website.

www.haveyouhadthatbabyyet.com

It's funny!

Mommy to a beautiful DD, my 3yo princess!dust.gif

 

Excited to meet baby #2, due Nov 2013!!  belly.gifh20homebirth.gif

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#13 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 01:27 PM
 
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When people ask me when I'm due, I say anytime between now and when she gets here The ony one that annoys me is when people ask when my DOCTOR thinks I will give birth lol. I just say my midwives are confident that the baby will be born, probably after I go into labor...

Placenta eating EC mom to my sweet DS Skyy 08/24/08 and Lotus Birth HBAC DD Aspen 01/13/2010 Healed by her birth
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#14 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 01:49 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chiromommy10 View Post
I've been getting this a lot from people lately too! I'm about 39 1/2 weeks and everyone swore I'd go early...no such luck! It just sets up emotional expectations when people say it all the time!! So, I've started sending people to this website.

www.haveyouhadthatbabyyet.com

It's funny!
LOL I love that. I think it just made my day.
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#15 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 03:59 PM
 
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YES...

I'm SO over people asking me when I'm due and also asking me if I'm sure there is only one baby in there... done... I'm DONE...
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#16 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 04:22 PM
 
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I get calls or texts everyday. And now I'm officially 1 day past my due date, so now I have to deal with all the post due date comments. I love this one...you run into someone in the store (or, in my case, it could be the MIL)...Have you had that baby yet? Keep in mind they are standing there looking at your rather obvious baby "mountain". Seriously, my in-laws are always bugging me about something. I try to tell myself they are just concerned, but mostly I think they just like annoying the crap out of me.

Mom to Amanda 19, Megan 7 and 1 in the oven due New Year's day
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#17 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 04:48 PM
 
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Just wanted to say, "I hear ya!"

Want to wear a sign that says "Yes, I'm sure it's just one. No, I haven't had the baby yet. Yes, it could be anytime, 4 minutes or 4 weeks from now. No, I don't know what it is. Yes, I will somehow survive not knowing the gender."
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#18 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 05:08 PM
 
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it gets even more annoying when you pass your EDD! I was a week over last time and wanted to tear out hair of the next person to ask me and then say "oh that sucks doesn't it?"

this time i've been telling every one january sometime but if she's anything like her brother she'll be here in February and that seems to shoo people away. although i'm as big as a house now so i'm sure they're thinking my DD was yesterday!

Amy
SAHM to a super sweet and sensitive 2 year old and a happy giggle-monster baby (1/2010).
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#19 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 05:49 PM
 
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Meh. People ask all the time and I used to say "the end of January"...now I just say "any day now." Honestly, I don't care to explain that EDD is an ESTIMATE.

Angela
Chatty Girl - 3/2006, Lovey Boy - 1/2010, Delicious Baby Girl - 1/2012
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#20 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 09:16 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Catubodua View Post
so with you on this!

except it's slightly different for me. most folks in my life remember that it's january, but not when in january, so they keep saying "any day now!" and then act shocked when i say, "nope, it's still a few weeks away"

i've started to just agree with whatever people say. makes my life easier. yup, anyday. yup, i've dropped a ton. yup, i haven't dropped at all. yup, i must be having twins/triplets/a litter. yup, i don't even look like i'm 9 months pregnant.


i swear i will never say anything other than "you look wonderful, i'm so happy for you" to pregnant women in the future.
I love it- no one really knows what they are talking about so why not just agree with them, shorten the conversation and move on! Yee-ha freedom! Especially in a small town where everyone is friendly and wants to be supportive! You made me laugh out loud THANKS!
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#21 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 10:21 PM
 
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I've not told my specific due date to very many people. I usually say end of January and let that suffice. Some people push for the date (like my sisters/mom/MIL) and I tell them, but they know I go 41 weeks so it doesn't matter if they know.

I try not to leave the house so I don't have to answer many questions, hehe.
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#22 of 26 Old 01-02-2010, 10:56 PM
 
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The thing that is REALLY getting to me is when the same people ask over and over when my due date is. Like, it's the only thing they can think of for small talk. I feel like screaming, "I am SO SICK of telling you my due date over and over and over and over!! Will you just F*&@% write it down or something?" And it is close relatives too, like our parents/siblings/etc.

I've stopped giving a date. I'm 37 weeks today so I just say something vague like, "Any time after today would be good!"

mommy to ds 11/05, dd1 01/08, and dd2 01/10!
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#23 of 26 Old 01-04-2010, 02:35 AM
 
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It doesn't seem like anyone can think of anything else to say to a pregnant woman!

Happily married to DH and awaiting our little blessing
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#24 of 26 Old 01-04-2010, 08:47 AM
 
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I usually will just say that the baby should be here by Feb 1st. That's when I would be 42 weeks LOL If I do tell people my actual due date, the 18th, I get the "oh, any day now!" comments. Well, my son decided he would hang out 11 days longer than my due date, which I am totally cool with LOL

Christina, mom to Alaina, Addison, Noah, and Magdalyn
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#25 of 26 Old 01-04-2010, 11:33 AM
 
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I totally agree with how annoying it is to have people constantly ask and call.

This is my third child, you would think my mother would realize at this point that when I do actually go into labor I will call her just like I did the last two times I delivered babies!

"Hey, I've got nothin' to do today but smile." - S & G
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#26 of 26 Old 01-04-2010, 12:09 PM
 
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I was walking around Home Depot on Saturday, and I got the feeling that they didn't want me there because I'm so pregnant....

...I think they were worried that I was going to give birth right then and there!

it was kind of funny.

cheers,
charlene
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