Shower for #2? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 02:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Does it happen? If so, have you had one? If you have, did you get just as much as you got with your 1st shower or less? I'm just curious. I've got a couple of friends that want to throw me one, but I'm not sure if it's necessary.....We have everything that we need from when DS was a baby - the only things that we could use would be clothes/bedding if it's a girl and maybe a bouncy seat and/or new stroller....but that's it.

Just curious as to how common they actually are or not.

TIA!

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#2 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 02:42 PM
 
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Sure does - I've been to several. And yeah, they got a lot of stuff. At the last one I went to, they asked for diapers, wipes, etc, and got fluffy pink girl stuff instead. Word of warning - if you want boring diapers, don't tell family you're having a girl when her older sib was a boy! LOL!

Anyway, they happen. But if you don't actually feel you need stuff, and know you'll get extra crap you don't need, what about a Blessingway, or a non-gift celebration shower?

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#3 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 03:03 PM
 
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I'm only having my first, but I've thought about this question before, and I know that I will at least want to have some sort of event to celebrate the coming of the new baby. It doesn't have to be about the gifts, it can just be a party of sorts, celebrating a new life. I know there are people that don't do it, but I know I will.

If friends want to throw you a shower, I'd say go for it! If there isn't much on your registry, I'm sure you'll enjoy getting things like clothes, books, toiletries, other cute gifts, etc.
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#4 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 03:19 PM
 
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As far as having one, it seems to vary from area to area. Around here you only get one for your first in the vast majority of cases. The few that I have been to for a second child have mostly been clothes and diapers. I've only received a shower for my first baby.

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#5 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 04:39 PM
 
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I think I'm going to have a baby blessing, or welcoming. Something you do after baby is born. I like this idea better for #2, gifts feel more optional

One son , 3 years old. One husband, nine years of love. Expecting A Girl Feb 25, 2010
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#6 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 06:03 PM
 
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I've never had a baby shower, but I've attended showers for 2nd (and more!) babies. I think you should do it if you want to.

Keri, wife to Tony, mom to five DDs: M ('96), S('01), E('04), A('07) and J('10);
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#7 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 06:18 PM
 
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I was always told by my old fashioned grandma that it was tacky to have a baby shower for baby #2 or #3 and so on....
I don't necessarily feel that way!
I think it's perfectly fine to have a celebration for the upcoming arrival of a new little one. But yes, as other posters have said, more like a "gifts optional" sort of thing. Nothing like your first shower where you are sitting in the middle of a room opening heaps of gifts while everyone stares at you.

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#8 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 06:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So with all that's been said, should I register???

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#9 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 06:42 PM
 
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Hey why not? People are still going to get you gifts even if you don't have a baby shower. Might as well get things that are useful right?! I know I am going to make a registry full of cloth diapers! Just in case one of the grandmas want to get the baby something. After spending all day stripping DD2's dipes I don't know how long they will last through baby #3.

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#10 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 07:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I went ahead and did one - I picked a few essentials that we could use - right now, they're gender neutral, but still very cute. About 12 items. We'll see what happens.

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#11 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 08:19 PM
 
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Heck - I'm not having a shower (it would feel a bit odd since I didn't with DD!) and I'm going to "register" at a couple of online natural parenting stores! I know family will still want to buy us gifts, and if they want to help with the cost of a newborn CD stash, they're welcome to!

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#12 of 26 Old 07-28-2009, 11:29 PM
 
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As far as I know I'm not having one, but if a few girlfriends want to have a "let's have coffee and celebrate the impending baby" night I would be thrilled. Sometimes that happens in my social circle(s) but I guess it depends on if someone feels motivated to throw one for me.

Last time I had two showers and got almost nothing from my registries, so even if I was having a huge gift shower I wouldn't count on getting baby items. Luckily I don't need much, mostly clothes if I have a boy and i will be consignment shopping for those.

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#13 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 11:11 AM
 
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Last time I had two showers and got almost nothing from my registries, so even if I was having a huge gift shower I wouldn't count on getting baby items. Luckily I don't need much, mostly clothes if I have a boy and i will be consignment shopping for those.
That's exactly what happened with my shower. I think I got three things total off of my registry?

As far as registering goes, if you are having a shower then I would definitely register. You can't guarantee people will buy from it, but some people like that extra help when picking a gift. I personally wouldn't do one if you weren't having a shower, but that's me.

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#14 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 11:13 AM
 
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Bouncing into your DDC...I had a 2nd shower with this pregnancy. Someone on the MDC board actually volunteered to throw it for me. It was great...everything I got was either from my registries or was things I wanted/needed anyway...lots of like-minded mamas. It was great!

Mama with DD (01/04) and DD (08/09)
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#15 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 11:19 AM
 
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Aww Raene that is so sweet! What nice virtual friends. :

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#16 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 12:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That's exactly what happened with my shower. I think I got three things total off of my registry?

As far as registering goes, if you are having a shower then I would definitely register. You can't guarantee people will buy from it, but some people like that extra help when picking a gift. I personally wouldn't do one if you weren't having a shower, but that's me.
Yeah, if I don't have a shower, then the registry that I made is basically a 'check list', if you will, of things that we'll need when the baby comes. Now, we can either buy some of it, or family and friends can - whichever works.

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#17 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 12:43 PM
 
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Originally Posted by busymama77 View Post
Yeah, if I don't have a shower, then the registry that I made is basically a 'check list', if you will, of things that we'll need when the baby comes. Now, we can either buy some of it, or family and friends can - whichever works.
Zactly. Since all we really need are CDs, and no one who wants to buy stuff will know what I'm talking about, I can guide them to the sites. If they want to buy from there, they can (they're all in other provinces so it might make it easier on them), or they can decide to buy something else. Or they can decide to just send a card, and that would be just fine too

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#18 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 12:55 PM
 
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I got one for my 2nd child because it was Dh's 1st baby His friends threw it for us. I don't know if we'll have one for this baby...I think my BFF will probably throw one for us because my two youngest kids will be 10 years apart...and we no longer have baby stuff (except for the stuff I have for the daycare babies, which they are still using, lol).

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#19 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 02:45 PM
 
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I've wondered this same thing. I didn't think much of it, until having heard from two people that you aren't supposed to have a shower for 2nd, 3rd, and so on... I can't imagine we would have one especially if it is a boy since we already have everything. I didn't know there were any "rules."

I say do what feels right. If people want to throw you something, let them! They're just showing their love for you and the baby!

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#20 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 05:54 PM
 
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I don't think you should register, unless you've totally changed how your going to parent your new little one (using cloth v. disposable, organic more often, etc..) I think the second shower would be more about a celebration of another new life - not so much the "needs". People love buying clothes anyway and moms will get you all the stuff that they could use more of. You could always let people know if they ask that it would be nice to have a new stroller or bouncy seat. I hope my friends or family don't want to throw me another just because I would feel awkward.

Mama to three

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#21 of 26 Old 07-29-2009, 11:20 PM
 
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No one in our families offered to have a shower for our second...it was a second boy, I'm wondering if they would have it he had been a she?

My best friends threw me a Belly Blessing, though, and I would MUCH prefer to have one of those again than to have a traditional shower. Showers seem so...impersonal and cliche after having a Belly Blessing.

Vallere: Blessed Wife, Doula, Homeschool Mom to Ian Gray(11/20/05), Zollie Isaac(10/14/07), Anna Zophia (8/14/09):, and a GIRL coming June 2010!
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#22 of 26 Old 07-30-2009, 12:03 PM
 
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What's a Belly Blessing?


I was a little sad when no one recognized DS's birth. Not that I felt a huge need for a big party and gifts. But there was a group of ladies from church that I hung out with at the time (two have since moved away) - one was due about 2 months before me and the others were due about 3 months after. We went out for dessert for the first and for the other two we did fondue and mixed "drinks" at someone's house - yet no even paid attention to me being preggo/with a newborn. Hurt my feelings a bit.

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#23 of 26 Old 07-30-2009, 05:38 PM
 
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I got a shower for my 1st, but not my 2nd. I did have 2 girls 15 months apart, in the same small community though. And while I felt a little badly about it, I tried to keep it in that perspective. I think dd2 was the only baby born in that community without a shower, but it was a gradschool where people were only together for a short time. The great thing about that was that I knew a woman who got her first shower for her 5th baby! So I think it depends. If you're in the same place with the same people, I wouldn't count on it. But you generally do get baby gifts even if you don't get a shower.

I am rather hoping to get a shower for this one. We're in a new place now, and I hope at least my husband's work will do something for us, but we'll see.

In any case, if we do have a shower, I'm going to request all gifts either hand-made or recycled (so thrift store or etsy if buying, and otherwise made by giver). There's not much I need if it's another girl, but if it's a boy, I'll need tons.

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#24 of 26 Old 07-30-2009, 06:29 PM
 
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I had one for our second girl
I am wondering if we will this time for our third, but knowing my family we probably will
it's a celebration for the new arrival of a baby into the family, each one deserves it I believe.
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#25 of 26 Old 07-31-2009, 12:41 PM
 
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We will have some sort of party, but I will clearly state NO GIFTS. I mean these people purchased for our wedding, our first child, all his birthdays, I don't need a whole lot, clothes, ect. I shop secondhand, and we will be fine gearwise. I know I will be getting a new swing, but we can handle it. We had a BabyQ last time, with couples, children invited, ect. I dont have a lot of "girlfriends" per se, so a party was what we did. We had some awesome food and just hung out, no cheezy games. It was really a good time, and we will most likely repeat that, maybe even after baby arrives. We're kinda fly by the seat of our pants kinda people, so....

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#26 of 26 Old 08-01-2009, 10:42 PM
 
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I think that if your friends want to throw you one let them!! I'd love to get another one .......I had 2 with my first baby from coworkers and from family....with my second I was away from family and not working...got none...with my third and fourth away from family and got none either...now I'm still away from family BUT I have made it clear to my dh I would like for him to give me sort of one....my favorite foods....maybe a lil something for me (maybe a book?)and my dd would love to get a few baby clothes for new baby....I am looking forward to that

Mom to 5 little angels in Texas and expecting another blessing in Summer 2012!!:

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