Listen to me whine! *Official Whine Thread* - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 07:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm a big baby, just indulge me.

I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore! Of course, I need this baby to keep on cooking since I'm not due till the end of Feb. But I am just so DONE. I never felt like this with DD...I was fat and happy right till I gave birth when she was 36 weeks. Right now I just feel round and tired (continually, utterly exhausted is more like it) and blah blah blah. I miss my lap. I miss my feet. I miss clothes that fit. I miss having sex in the usual positions

I want to meet my baby and put him in all the cute outfits and breastfeed again! I want to have my VBAC! And I sort of just want to get this over with....there has been so much anxiety over how DD will respond to her brother. Just ready to move on to it actually happening so I don't need to worry about it anymore.

Ok, I'm done for now. On to dishwashing and dinner making (I don't wanna!!!!) ok, now I'm really done

Feel free to add your whining! We all need a place to unload.

Sabrina loving wife to Nate , frazzled mom to Gabriella (1-23-07) and Robert (2-9-10) My bed and heart are overflowing!
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#2 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 08:07 PM
 
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For some reason, I feel like this pregnancy is taking longer than it did with my 1st. Sure, it's all new and exciting when your preggers with your first and yu think 9 months, holy crap, that's a long time, but it flew by for me when I was pg with DS. Granted, he didn't appear until 40 weeks and 3 days, and I was much more miserable during that pregnancy than I am now, but yes, I cannot WAIT to meet this little guy. To get our family somewhat settled and in to a routine. To try breastfeeding again. To wear my mei tai again. To smell that baby smell again. To get my body back in order and get back in to my normal clothes.

Don't get me wrong, both of my pregnancies have been text book and I'm feeling great, but it's all about patience with me and the excitement of getting to meet a new little person that has me going crazy these days!!

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#3 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 08:36 PM
 
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I felt that way with my Son too, completely fine to keep on going with my daughter... I wonder if it has something to do with haveing a boy that makes you more uncomfortable.

But, for what it';s worth, I know what you mean! Take a your daughter on a few special dates before she is no longer the only one! Might be fun.
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#4 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 08:46 PM
 
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Let's see this pregnancy I have had or currently have...

Heart palpitations
Low blood pressure
Low iron and all that goes with that
False diagnosis of gestational diabetes
Hemorrhoids
Horrendous heartburn and acid reflux
Bladder spasms
Crotchal achiness
Sleep Apnea

SO YEP! For the first time in 4 pregnancies I am absolutely miserable and soooo very ready to be done! I feel bad about feeling bad because it is my last pregnancy and I would so like to enjoy it right up until the end, but it wasn't meant to be.

38y.o. wife to the best husband on earth for the last 19 years and Mommy to 5 going on 6. DUE Feb. 2, 2010. We delay and selective vax. I love BF'ing and CD'ing.
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#5 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 09:56 PM
 
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Yup, totally done. 4th pregnancy in less than 5 years and it's lost the glamor. Plus the not sleeping, the painful cankles I've developed this week, heartburn, fatigue, the stress with the landlord, oh, and the half a dozen people at church tonight going bug-eyed and saying "you are still here?!"....yeah I'm done. 2 more weeks (maybe less) since they are talking of inducing me on the 29th, but it seems like eternity...

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#6 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 10:04 PM
 
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Hugs to everyone! I totally get how you are all feeling and I think it is good for us to get it out!
Is this now a thread where we can share our whining/overwhlemedness? Cause I was just going to do that myself-

Feeling totally overwhelmed right now at the thought of - giving birth to a baby, nursing- everything that comes with having a baby and having no idea what to expect or what I am doing! Totally overwhelmed. Just had a birthing class and just got nervous about all of it. The birth, and mostly having a baby to care for- nursing, lack of sleep- everything! And also getting everything ready before then.
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#7 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 10:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm so glad you guys didn't tell me to shut up and enjoy these precious moments! Hahaha.

Katie34, I'm going to make this our official whine thread

Sabrina loving wife to Nate , frazzled mom to Gabriella (1-23-07) and Robert (2-9-10) My bed and heart are overflowing!
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#8 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 10:25 PM
 
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Yay Clicksab! An official whine thread- I love it! So I will go on!

Heartburn, shortness of breath,insomnia, exhaustion, uncomfortable to sit for too long, no energy to do anything.

It's funny- I am a few wks behind some of you and I remember some of you mentioning various discomforts and I wasn't quite there yet. Now at 34 weeks it is getting intense here in this body of mine. I totally get what some of you have been mentioning! And 6 or 7 more weeks to get even huger and for my lungs and stomach to compress even more!
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#9 of 71 Old 01-13-2010, 10:41 PM
 
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LOVE IT!

I am adding to my whine!

I am so tired of getting up every hour (sometimes every 1/2 hour) to pee all night long. I don't have to pee that often during the day... it's just plain wrong!

I am so sick of the heartburn! The other night I was sleeping just fine when a wave of acid came into my mouth, my nose, my eye and my ear... it was horrid... I am living proof all those organs are connected!

I will have more before this pregnancy is over!! I so needed this thread... :-)

38y.o. wife to the best husband on earth for the last 19 years and Mommy to 5 going on 6. DUE Feb. 2, 2010. We delay and selective vax. I love BF'ing and CD'ing.
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#10 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 12:36 AM
 
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Allow me to raise a glass of whine with you all!


I'm feeling just a tiiiiiiiiny bit overwhelmed tonight! SO MUCH to do now in just a short time to get all these new questions answered! Maybe the smilie I really need is this one:


ROFL!

Sarah, Queen of Hearts, raising a Full House with Michael, King of my Heart!
DS (2/02), DD (3/04), DS (1/06), DD (12/07), and DS (3/10)
~~*~~Not your typical Pastor's Wife!~~*~~
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#11 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 12:52 AM
 
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And do people really not know how stupid they sound when they ask the (very obviously about to pop any day now) pregnant woman "you haven't had that baby yet?"

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#12 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 01:19 AM
 
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Allowing me to complain? heh You asked for it

Im sore EVERYWHERE! My hips, back, stomach, legs, it all hurts constantly. I am mean and irritable to the ppl I love and I feel horrible for it. I told my SO today that he could compare me to a wounded wild animal...approach with extreme caution because I could strike out at any time for any reason or no reason at all. Its uncontrollable! I'm having constant contractions or so it seems but when I time them they are all over the damn place. I had a dr appt on Monday and there was no dilation and the stupid dr was trying to convince me to just do a repeat c-section and I want my VBAC soooo bad. I'm not going down without a freaking fight either! I cant sleep, and when i finally sleep I have to get up to pee, or my daughter is up for the day etc. I am so miserable and HUGE that my skin is actually ripping in places....I just want to cry and I dont even have teh energy for that!

Summer--momma to Cassie (9-27-06) and Dominic 1-28-10
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#13 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 01:23 AM
 
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Great thread idea!

Here's my whine - I really miss sleeping on my back! I can't get comfortable at night because one hip hurts, then I switch sides and the other hip hurts...and every time I roll over I feel like a beached whale flopping around in the bed, lol. So I'm really lethargic and tired during the day, which isn't good with all the deadlines I have in the next couple weeks.
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#14 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 03:13 AM
 
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*whine* I wanna whine, toooooo!

How come nobody ELSE is up nursing in the middle of the night?!

My term babies, I could just latch them on and go back to sleep. This preemie, I've got to wake up all the way and stay awake until she's done. Borrriiinnnnng!

Tamara: Aspiring doula, partner to Brazilian musician, mom to THREE GIRLIES!
(4/01, 6/07, & 12/09)
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#15 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 10:46 AM
 
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Allowing me to complain? heh You asked for it

Im sore EVERYWHERE! My hips, back, stomach, legs, it all hurts constantly. I am mean and irritable to the ppl I love and I feel horrible for it. I told my SO today that he could compare me to a wounded wild animal...approach with extreme caution because I could strike out at any time for any reason or no reason at all. Its uncontrollable! I'm having constant contractions or so it seems but when I time them they are all over the damn place. I had a dr appt on Monday and there was no dilation and the stupid dr was trying to convince me to just do a repeat c-section and I want my VBAC soooo bad. I'm not going down without a freaking fight either! I cant sleep, and when i finally sleep I have to get up to pee, or my daughter is up for the day etc. I am so miserable and HUGE that my skin is actually ripping in places....I just want to cry and I dont even have teh energy for that!
Why would they expect dilation at just 35 weeks?

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#16 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 10:48 AM
 
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Here is my spoiled brat whine- forgive my overindulgent spoiled brattiness on this - dh and I just spent a bunch of money on a new mattress and box spring- felt so proud of ourselves for getting a really nice one. But we got a queen sized. Now we think we should have gotten a king since we will likely co sleep. ( I am getting a sleigh bed arms reach co sleeper but many say we will end up with baby in bed more than the co sleeper)
But we can't return the queen and can't get a king now cause we spent lots on a nice queen. So now I am worried that we won't sleep well with the baby! And sleep has already become so much more fragile than ever and will more so with the babe.
There- spoiled brat whine cause I know I am so damn lucky to even have a nice queen sized bed and a nice lovely wonderful husband to share it with and a nice wonderful baby on the way.
But I still had to whine about it!
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#17 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 11:09 AM
 
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wow- whining really works! I feel better and more at peace with this already- like 10 minutes after posting it!
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#18 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 11:51 AM
 
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Allow me to raise a glass of whine with you all!


I'm feeling just a tiiiiiiiiny bit overwhelmed tonight! SO MUCH to do now in just a short time to get all these new questions answered! Maybe the smilie I really need is this one:


ROFL!
LOVE IT!!!

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#19 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 11:55 AM
 
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And do people really not know how stupid they sound when they ask the (very obviously about to pop any day now) pregnant woman "you haven't had that baby yet?"
Oh, good grief, I know. I remember when I was pg with DS and the last week everyone and their freakin' dog was asking "you're still here?". Nah, I already gave birth, he's at home with DH and I just decided to return back to work early - oh and my uterus hasn't gone down just yet, but still, I love you guys so much that I thought I would come back to work 11 weeks early!

Get a clue, people!!! And it was ALL older women - older than 45/50, maybe?
Now, I've got my MIL just thinking and be a know-it-all that I'm going to come early. She said the exact same thing with DS and he was 3 days late. He'll get here when the good Lord decides!!

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#20 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 12:15 PM
 
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Oh, good grief, I know. I remember when I was pg with DS and the last week everyone and their freakin' dog was asking "you're still here?". Nah, I already gave birth, he's at home with DH and I just decided to return back to work early - oh and my uterus hasn't gone down just yet, but still, I love you guys so much that I thought I would come back to work 11 weeks early!

Get a clue, people!!! And it was ALL older women - older than 45/50, maybe?
Now, I've got my MIL just thinking and be a know-it-all that I'm going to come early. She said the exact same thing with DS and he was 3 days late. He'll get here when the good Lord decides!!
Yes - why is it always other women, and usually women who have had kids themselves? And I got another phone call this morning from my friend - at like 730 in the morning so I let the voice mail getting it. The thing is - she texted me two days to see how I was doing, I replied fine, not much going on, baby was big and we were inducing at the end of the month if he hadn't come on his own. Doesn't she think that if I somehow had managed to have the baby in the last two days I would have called her? I'm just now full term today!

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#21 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 12:47 PM
 
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Why would they expect dilation at just 35 weeks?
I havnt updated my ticker, but I'm actually 37 weeks. Possibly 38 no one really knows for sure. I'm due anywhere from 1-26 to 2-5. So I dont know. . . I dont see why whether or not i've dilated yet means anything anyways...not until i'm like 42 weeks and nothing is going on ya know?

Summer--momma to Cassie (9-27-06) and Dominic 1-28-10
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#22 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 12:57 PM
 
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I had a dr appt on Monday and there was no dilation and the stupid dr was trying to convince me to just do a repeat c-section and I want my VBAC soooo bad.
You do not have to consent to vaginal exams. Regular prenatal care doesn't need to involve the removal of underwear at all. Especially if you want that VBAC.

Tamara: Aspiring doula, partner to Brazilian musician, mom to THREE GIRLIES!
(4/01, 6/07, & 12/09)
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#23 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 01:40 PM
 
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I havnt updated my ticker, but I'm actually 37 weeks. Possibly 38 no one really knows for sure. I'm due anywhere from 1-26 to 2-5. So I dont know. . . I dont see why whether or not i've dilated yet means anything anyways...not until i'm like 42 weeks and nothing is going on ya know?
I don't see why either. I mean, I like knowing if I've made "progress" personally - though I do know in the back of my mind that even if you are dilated/effaced that doesn't mean much! I walked around for a week 5 cm dilated and 80% effaced with DS and STILL didn't go into labor.

Nicole, Mommy to Jasmine (7/05) , Athena (2/07) , Shane (3/08) , Caleb (1/10), and 2 angels (4/06 & 4/09)
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#24 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 02:25 PM
 
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oh girls, don't even get me started.

Nothing is going as planned. My mother was supposed to come and be here with the other two kids...she's not coming. And even worse, she's involving me in her totally personal dysfunctional drama with my father, to whom she is still married and in a totally toxic relationship.

My little brother (who's been my bff since, well, his birth!) has recently become some hotshot at his job and saved a hot load of money and realizes that said parents are actually "proud" of him now so he feels that he's "succeeded" and now can dole it out to me. I've been getting lectures left and right about what I screw up I am (um...since when did you become Dad and Mom) and how absolutely amazing it is to be him and have a Midas Touch. It's heartbreaking cause I lost my support system. I feel he has no respect for me. And I don't even know this monster he's turned into.

My inlaws are pretty pissed that we've put these boundaries down on them. At first they were acting a tinge remorseful and bringing gifts around for the kids on our once a month visits. But after I let them in our home, it seems that they feel all boundaries should be off and I'm totally being ridiculous now. But they've had it and are ready to take action. So, they've found a job for my husband in Nigeria and have suggested that he send me (his 9 month pregnant wife) and our two children (both under age 5) to the USA to "let her parents take care of them". Charming folk, really. DH wasn't buying it (thank goodness) and so this morning, my mil called him to let him know that she visited a coffee grinds reading psychic who said that I am basically a bitchy woman. She just wanted to let him know that SHE didn't say that, but a psychic totally picked up on that energy, so obvioulsy, if a psychic knows I'm a b*tch then dh should totally know that and he'd better get rid of me before he embarasses himself. Again. Charming.

DH called me to tell me and also say "it's weird how she knows, though, don't you think?"

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! I mean, he didn't even say this tounge in cheek. And our marriage has really been great. Even he's been commenting on it! But he has said "you are so excitable...you are pregnant with hormones...impatient for the baby, you just need to calm down and deal with it." and basically, in his eyes, I've been a big b*tch lately. Not doing what I usually do, making him do "everything" (ie, bathe the kids or get up on stepladders to reach stuff). Anyways, then he tried to save face saying "well she probably meant that you are a strong opininated woman who is very special and unique and that's why I love you and married you. Um, yeah, no thanks dude. Now go and get me some Oreos.

Baby has been really painful for ages. My pubic bone is so sore that when mw touches it to do fundal measurements I'm wincing in pain. Then she was like "well, the baby isn't positioned well, he's too high, and babies like that tend to have cord problems. I mean, WTF?! I was 36 weeks the day she came over, and because the baby isn't engaged he's now got cord problems? And what about people with breech babies at this point in the pregnancy? Jeeze!

So, even though I know it is bunk and totally bogus, I've still got it in the back of my mind which really p*sses me off.

My kids are bored and annoyed with me for not giving them enough attention. We are having constant showdowns. But basically, I can't even get them out of the house every day now, it's just such a pita to walk anywhere. I dont' want to be touched, everything hurts an dmy kids get such a rise out of trying to sit on my lap and jump on my back and do all these things I haven't asked them to do. I'm trying to be patient, but jeeze.

We are considering moving back to be near my family and my parents have basically come out saying that even though they offered all this and more, on second thought, they don't want to have to miss bowling league or golf or whatever to watch the kids fo rthe 10 hrs/week that they promised while I go to school and they also feel that, since I obviously NEED their help, this is a great time to start lecturing me about what a failure I am. Suddenly it dawned on me that I'm a 30 year old woman who ran away from home at age 16 (though they made me keep coming back until they couldn't anymore when I was 18, usually legal authorities) and I did it for a reason. I've NEVER come back and I don't know why I was thinking that anything changed.

DH is critizing me, saying I'm not forceful enough with them making good on their promises, but frankly, I don't need them. I don't need his family either. That isn't family, that's just drama and heartache. I've got some good friends but they are really spread out. Yes, my kids might have to go to a babysitters for a few hours for a month or so so I can get a nap and whatever. Or maybe I need to let my neighbors make them lunch at first. I've done all I can do. Frozen 2 weeks worth of meals for the family (which was no easy feat...and I'd do more if there was only more room), gotten all the laundry for the baby and everything done...I'm ready to go and now I just want to get this show on the road...get the birth and most importantly the immediate time post partum behind me and deal with planning for the future.

I'm SICK AND TIRED of people telling me that I'm not patient enough with the baby. I sat patiently through two births and a home miscarriage and now I want a slightly early baby (2 weeks or so) and you know what, that's fine! I'mn so sick of my parents looking for opportunities to try and make me out to be totally vulnerable and helpless so that they can swoop in and "save me" from this terrible life I've chosen (which they've been trying to do for 14 years...STILL with no success). I'm sick of my in laws trying to manupulate dh to leave me so that he can marry the Israeli woman of their dreams for him. I'm sick of my violent bil and sil who have both physically attacked me. One because he felt that I wasn't respectful enough to his father and the other because she felt I insulted her honor by not saying hello to her in a grocery store in the middle of a miscarriage.

I'm also sick of people thinking that just because I'm American I'm dripping in diamonds and cash and that if I don't spend money here or there I'm just withholding.

I'm angry that I was just thrown out of my house (given 6 months notice, but still) a few days ago and that they were pretty heartless about it. They were like "if you don't have enough money to build a home now, then maybe you should find another village that better fits your socio-economic status." I'm just angry at how unfair it is that so many people have their parents as a support, if not physically at least emotionally, and I just don't and neither does DH and it's a constant struggle to keep them in our lives but still far enough away where they can't do harm.

I'm just so frustrated and sad.

 http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Wise-Woman-Fertility/182752565080597
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#25 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 03:15 PM
 
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OK... here is one I haven't heard yet. We all know that potty breaks get us up umpteen times a night, and so does having to roll over and it taking every ounce of strength and energy to accomplish it. Well on top of that you know what is waking me up??? DROOLING!!! Isn't that just disgusting and ridiculous? I have so much saliva that I wake up several times a night with it running out my mouth or covering my face or hand... YUCK YUCK YUCK... sorry if I grossed everyone out!!

38y.o. wife to the best husband on earth for the last 19 years and Mommy to 5 going on 6. DUE Feb. 2, 2010. We delay and selective vax. I love BF'ing and CD'ing.
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#26 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 04:58 PM
 
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And do people really not know how stupid they sound when they ask the (very obviously about to pop any day now) pregnant woman "you haven't had that baby yet?"
Tell them you have, and see what they say.

Urg. I whine too. Just a generalized whine.
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#27 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 05:12 PM
 
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wow Jul511riv that is some major crap to be dealing with- especially at the end of a pregnancy. I am so sorry everyone aorund is being so unhelpful to you! That totally sucks.
I hope you can find the right community to live in- in whichever country you really want to be in, and find the support you need in your life. Are you considering moving back to the USA but maybe not near your family? Maybe, once you are past the birth and the initial new baby stuff, you can focus on visualizing your ideal living place and work to make that happen. Because then maybe you can really find a good loving nurturing place to raise your family where you could have like minded kind people helping you out. I Am so sorry that so many people are making things even harder for you right now. I wish you the best and hope you can find a way at some point to transition to a place where you have the good support you want and deserve.
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#28 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 05:27 PM
 
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OK... here is one I haven't heard yet. We all know that potty breaks get us up umpteen times a night, and so does having to roll over and it taking every ounce of strength and energy to accomplish it. Well on top of that you know what is waking me up??? DROOLING!!! Isn't that just disgusting and ridiculous? I have so much saliva that I wake up several times a night with it running out my mouth or covering my face or hand... YUCK YUCK YUCK... sorry if I grossed everyone out!!
OMG!!!! I thought I was the only one. I can't fall asleep for 5 mins without soaking my damn pillowcase! It's gross and SOOO unlady like. WTH!!???

One happy mama to 1/06 , 3/10 , and married to my best friend
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#29 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 05:44 PM
 
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Jul511riv, my heart goes out to you!

I've been lurking and feeling like I shouldn' comment b/c I had my baby, but you are "my girls" and I have no other MDC area that I belong to...but I need to whine.

I need my in-laws out of the house. After a week it has come down to me staying in my bedroom topless (having some BFing problems today) and wishing I could go out and walk around topless. They are so kind to drive from OH to GA to be here for a week and have done tons of errands and home repairs, cooking, etc...but I just need my house back. And I just want to hold my baby all day and look at him, nurse, cuddle...but they are always offering to hold him at any opportunity. I obliged for a few days, but this child needs to eat every 2 hours--and with a preemie, that means waking him up from dreamland in your arms. I think they don't understand...and tend to make comments about me finally letting him go--not holding the baby. HELLO! This is my new baby that I just want to spend time with!!

Today my MIL asked if we could take him outside--as I am sitting there semi-topless and on the verge of crying b/c he is not feeding. I said, "no." She was shocked...

And they also push my toddler to do things he doesn't want to do "Miles--do this, Miles--do that, Miles--give me a hug, Miles---let me hold you." My toddler does not know them well, and you cannot make him give you love. I think that bothers me a lot, too, because if I am not with felix, I want to be with Miles. I was on bed rest for WEEKS in the hospital and didn't get to see my son often before Felix was born. I just want my own family time. I want to give my toddler a bath--hold him, put him to bed, read to him...and I don't want them there. Plus, it has been since early december we have had a rolling list of guests in and out of our house. I JUST NEED CALM.

Man, these post-pregnancy hormones are intense. But sometimes, a girl just needs to roam topless in her house and have all of her children to herself (and her husband).

I may be just about the most ungrateful person on the planet today...

Ali: Proud mother to Miles 05.16.08 and boy #2Felix 01.04.2010.
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#30 of 71 Old 01-14-2010, 05:58 PM
 
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Ficus of course you belong here!!!!! Stay and hang out with us! We all are having our babies at different times- and that is also why the ddc go 3 months ahead- it is not just the pregnancy but also the "4th trimester" 3 months. I may end up giving birth in March but this is still my ddc!
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