poetgirl - Another Mama of the Week (February 1-February 5) - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-31-2010, 01:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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poetgirl - Another Mama of the Week (February 1-February 5)

Hey it's your turn!

A few from me:

Real name?

Age?

Where are you from, where do you live now?

Due date?

How long were you ttc?

Gender preference, if you have one & will you find out?

Family - husbands, wives, partners, kids, pets and more?

Occupation?

Hobbies and other activities?

Only answer those you are comfortable with

Alicia - Mother to DS (12) and finally expecting another
Living on 100 acres with the love of my life, our son, goats, chickens, ducks, a cat and 2 Chesapeakes!
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Old 01-31-2010, 01:34 PM
 
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A few from me:

Real name? Jennifer

Age? 36

Where are you from, where do you live now? I grew up in CT, lived in San Francisco for 12 yrs, and have been living in Michigan for 1.5 yrs. I miss SF like nobody's business!

Due date? 5/24/10

How long were you ttc? over 3 years

Gender preference, if you have one & will you find out? No preference, just thrilled to get this opportunity. We are having a boy.

Family - husbands, wives, partners, kids, pets and more? Just my trusty DH of almost 10 years.

Occupation? I am actually a professional poet. I am the author of two books, I give workshops, critiques, judge contests, go to colleges and speak/give readings, etc.

Hobbies and other activities? Yoga, hiking, meditation, whole foods & local eating/cooking. I also write nonfiction and fiction. I have two agents reading a memoir right now

Thanks for the questions, Alicia!

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 01-31-2010, 05:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Another ahem, older, mama (over 35 I mean)! And you took a while to get here just like I did. I shouldn't like it but I sort of do like having others who are in the same situation as me.

Do your books have links you can share?

Alicia - Mother to DS (12) and finally expecting another
Living on 100 acres with the love of my life, our son, goats, chickens, ducks, a cat and 2 Chesapeakes!
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Old 01-31-2010, 09:23 PM
 
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Alicia, I hear you. Though you wouldn't wish infertility on anyone, it's always comforting to be reminded that you aren't the only for whom the journey to pregnancy has been possibly the hardest time of your life. We started when I was 32 with the intention of having two by around 36, but after all the obstacles I am so grateful to be here with #1. I get so emotional when I hear someone else has triumphed through this.

Thanks for asking about my books!

Here are two links about the most recent, "How to Live on Bread and Music":

http://www.perugiapress.com/books2009_bread.html
http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/20917

and the first book, "Salt Memory":
and http://www.mainstreetrag.com/store/books.php

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 01-31-2010, 11:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We were planning to get pregnant when I was about 30 and have 2. We're also just glad we finally have one on the way.

Alicia - Mother to DS (12) and finally expecting another
Living on 100 acres with the love of my life, our son, goats, chickens, ducks, a cat and 2 Chesapeakes!
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Old 02-01-2010, 02:12 PM
 
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We were planning to get pregnant when I was about 30 and have 2. We're also just glad we finally have one on the way.
I'm SO glad you're here, Mama!

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 02-01-2010, 06:03 PM
 
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so exciting about your books!

tell us one of your favourite childhood memories.

what is one thing you're feeling really cute in these days?

who are your favourite authors?

robina. unschooling mama and midwifery student.  building my nest with my husband, our daughter (born at home 11/07), our son (home waterbirth 5/10), and our newest little girl (born at home 4/13)!

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Old 02-01-2010, 06:29 PM
 
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so exciting about your books!

tell us one of your favourite childhood memories.

what is one thing you're feeling really cute in these days?

who are your favourite authors?
Thanks Brooklyn Warbler!

Childhood memory...getting a new refrigerator and having my dad cut a square out of the box so my sisters and I could turn it into a puppet theater. Then putting on puppet shows for anyone willing to sit on blankets in our backyard.

Feeling cute in black leggings with a knit or sweater dress on and boots!

Authors, Annie Dillard, Barbara Kingsolver, Aimee Bender, Haruki Murakami, Jane Hirshfield, Mark Doty, Mary Oliver

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 02-02-2010, 04:35 PM
 
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Morning or night person?

What is one thing you are sad about changing once baby arrives? And a change you are happy about?

*formerly apecaut*, Mom to A, Calliope (stillborn 40 weeks 6/22/07), A and O
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Old 02-02-2010, 05:58 PM
 
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Originally Posted by apecaut View Post
Morning or night person?

What is one thing you are sad about changing once baby arrives? And a change you are happy about?
Those are great questions.

I am a night person, but it is a perpetual cycle. I get a burst of energy around 11pm then go to bed late, then sleep later and it starts again. I am generally happier if I get up early and get some accomplished right away rather than sailing through in the 11th hour.

SAD: Because it's just been DH and I for almost 10 yrs, I am a little anxious about the transition from 2 to 3 of us. We made a largely fulfilling life with just the two of us. Also, as a writer, I will need to reshape my creative process some and learn how to work within smaller chunks of time. Course that could have a great effect on my creativity too!

HAPPY: Because it's taken so long to get pregnant and no one really believed I ever would, there are so many happy things to look forward to. But one thing that really stands out is how during all the years of trying and going through fertility treatment after treatment, I could just *feel* this child all around me, holding my hand, in my arms, across the room. I would almost look down for him/her at crosswalks or at the kitchen table while I made dinner. I can't wait for him to finally be there.

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 02-03-2010, 11:27 AM
 
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What an amazing feeling that must have been/be. I'm so happy for you and your DH

I worked at Kalamazoo College after grad school Is that the part of the mitten that you are in, too, or farther east?

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
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Old 02-03-2010, 12:27 PM
 
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What an amazing feeling that must have been/be. I'm so happy for you and your DH

I worked at Kalamazoo College after grad school Is that the part of the mitten that you are in, too, or farther east?
Thanks Starfish!

Yes that is the exact spot of the mitten I am in. In fact, next Spring, I will be teaching poetry at K College! How long were you there for?

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 02-03-2010, 03:08 PM
 
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Since you're well, a poet, and this baby is so longed for, I thought I'd post this poem for you (I hope you don't mind, it made me cry):

by Sharon Olds

The Planned Child


I hated the fact that they had planned me, she had taken

a cardboard out of his shirt from the laundry

as if sliding the backbone up out of his body,

and made a chart of the month and put

her temperature on it, rising and falling,

to know the day to make me—I would have

liked to have been conceived in heat,

in haste, by mistake, in love, in sex,

not on cardboard, the little x on the

rising line that did not fall again.



But when a friend was pouring wine

and said that I seem to have been a child who had been wanted,

I took the wine against my lips

as if my mouth were moving along

that valved wall in my mother’s body, she was

bearing down, and then breathing from the mask, and then

bearing down, pressing me out into

the world that was not enough for her without me in it,

not the moon, the sun, Orion

cartwheeling across the dark, not

the earth, the sea—none of it

was enough, for her, without me.

Babybel 8/5/08. Growing her sister: ***4***8***12***16***20***24***28***32***36**40*
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Old 02-03-2010, 03:11 PM
 
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And a question, what are your plans for baby's birth? Are you nervous/excited?

Babybel 8/5/08. Growing her sister: ***4***8***12***16***20***24***28***32***36**40*
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Old 02-03-2010, 04:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FiberLover View Post
Since you're well, a poet, and this baby is so longed for, I thought I'd post this poem for you (I hope you don't mind, it made me cry):

by Sharon Olds

The Planned Child


I hated the fact that they had planned me, she had taken

a cardboard out of his shirt from the laundry

as if sliding the backbone up out of his body,

and made a chart of the month and put

her temperature on it, rising and falling,

to know the day to make me—I would have

liked to have been conceived in heat,

in haste, by mistake, in love, in sex,

not on cardboard, the little x on the

rising line that did not fall again.



But when a friend was pouring wine

and said that I seem to have been a child who had been wanted,

I took the wine against my lips

as if my mouth were moving along

that valved wall in my mother’s body, she was

bearing down, and then breathing from the mask, and then

bearing down, pressing me out into

the world that was not enough for her without me in it,

not the moon, the sun, Orion

cartwheeling across the dark, not

the earth, the sea—none of it

was enough, for her, without me.
So lovely. I have taught a number of Sharon Olds' poems in lit classes I've taught but never this one.

That is way cool that you are in Kalamazoo! I have to admit that I was very unsure about moving there but I LOVED it! I was there from '99-01. I ran residence halls at that time. I lived in the HUGE apartment in Harmon Hall and was just so happy.

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
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Old 02-03-2010, 09:21 PM
 
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Fiberlover, I am a big Sharon Olds fan and I love that poem! Thanks for posting it and allowing me to revisit it today. What a treat

Starfish, We are warming up to Kazoo (well not this time of yr). There are some hidden gems here. Where do you live now?

BIRTH PLANS: I am so excited for the birth! We have been taking a wonderful natural childbirth class with a doula who went through infertility as well and then became very passionate about natural childbirth. This is where I am at too. That has been a big part of reclaiming some of our medical experience of conceiving. I love it. We are planning to birth with a midwife in a hospital setting that offers waterbirth and very nice birthing accommodations and the doula teaching our course will attend as well. Even if the ultimate "plan" goes another way by circumstance, having this concerted intention has been so powerful for me.

Since we're talking poems...here is one I wrote after our 20 week u/s. I thought of posting it as a post a few wks ago.

TWENTY WEEKS

We peeked into the fishbowl galaxy today
to view your recent work—

nebula of breath,
thumbprints from the moon.

We’ve lost touch with our own intricacy,
somewhere in the torque and wick of age

the hardscrabble bones,
but you are a kind of faith

orbiting the sonar,
blood’s low note a-swish.

It’s blizzarding again
and we are behind glass

silence piling up all around us.
Spin the half-made body

no upside, no down
king of no falling

lassoing the dark.
Tell us what we can’t remember.

There in the lit cocoon
we watched each wet yawn and stretch.

Fine boy,
the most important work you’ll do,

shape the four chambers
of your heart.

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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Old 02-03-2010, 11:15 PM
 
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Incredibly moving...delicious even. Thank you for sharing.


I live in Baltimore now I am forever thankful for my time in Michigan for giving me the opportunity to experience the Great Lakes. They are stunning and left me awestruck.

I am so touched, too, by your reflections on your desired birthing experience and how different it is from the science of getting pregnant.

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
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Old 02-03-2010, 11:16 PM
 
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I forgot to ask a question

Do you all have name/s picked out yet? Are you sharing? Do you feel pressure to come up with a lyrical literary name?

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
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Old 02-04-2010, 01:58 PM
 
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I love your 20w poem. Thank you for sharing!

Your birth plans sound wonderful, I'm glad you feel like you've been reclaiming yourself through them. With babybel, we did something similar, and I ended up having a wonderful experience in a hospital birth center with a midwife, all natural waterbirth. I can only hope this time goes the same!

What are your after baby plans? Maternity leave etc.?

Babybel 8/5/08. Growing her sister: ***4***8***12***16***20***24***28***32***36**40*
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Old 02-05-2010, 03:23 AM
 
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Thank you Starfish and Fiberlover!

Starfish, We have some names that are starting to stick a little. I had very lyrical girl names, but the boy names are harder. I don't want to give him an overly poetic name, but the cool thing is that my DH is related to the poet John Greenleaf Whittier and in fact the Greenleaf connection is a really important Cherokee thread in his family, so that will most likely by the middle name.

Fiberlover, I'm glad to hear about your birth experience. I had another mw appt. today and asked a lot of important procedure questions and she rocked every answer, so I am feeling really good about things. I have been teaching and writing from home for a while actually, so I plan to take some time off from all of that and then ease back in when I feel ready. We've never really had a lot of money, so I'm not giving that up.

Proud Mama to Liam Greenleaf 5/31/10
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