Postpartum whine thread - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 05:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok, let's here them...I know we all have them.

I am tired of my DH's lack of common sense and his parents need to control right now.

In order to go home early, I had to have a follow up Ped appt. for baby scheduled. We had that Monday morning, so that was trip #1 - we took kids to school, then to the appt. I also got in with an LC because we are having trouble nursing. We did that right after the Ped. appt. DH got caught late on site an hour away, so I had to load 4 kids in the car, drive the mortgage payment to the bank, and them come back. Noticed, a funky smell coming from Ds3 (the baby).

Tuesday - We took the kids to school, and I had to take the baby to an emergency Ped appt. His cord was putting off such a nasty horrible smell you wanted to puke if you got a wiff of it. They did some stuff in the office, and we think we got everything. Then picked the kids up from school, since it was on the way home from the Peds. Still struggling with nursing, but he had gained back some weight.

Today - helped DH get the kids off to school; then I needed to run an errand (needed some more tucks pads, and don't trust DH to get the right thing) and some more pads. I also had to help DH take DS2 on a field trip - basically sit in the car with DS3 and DD2 (who were asleep) while DH ran him into the theater to meet up with his class. I just wanted to go home and sleep --- nope because his cousin's computer is broke, and he said they could come over and use ours. The only place I can nurse is in my chair in my living room. So, during the only nap time I had today, I had a house with company.

With the running to the Ped, watching 2 older kids, and dealing with a newborn...I am done.

I need some relaxation....

Oh, and I think I have the beginnings of a sinus infection going on...
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#2 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 06:31 PM
 
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I have no idea how your managing all that hun. Heck when I told my midwife of my plans to go to an LLL meeting a week after baby was born she warned me that is all I should plan on doing that day and to be sure to rest up. I think she would be chewing your DH out about now for not making sure you can get more rest!

Army wife to wonder hubby. Mama to 4 and Surrogate mother x2.: Zoey Born 5/7/2010
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#3 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 08:46 PM
 
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I hear you mama. Loud and clear.

My DH came home from work a little early, which was nice but now the kids aren't even in bed yet and he's saying he "needs a break". Um, yeah. A break. That'd be nice. I've been caring for little people ALL day and I haven't had a break yet. Oh, and DH says he's so tired. PUH LEASE. Try feeding a sick newborn all night and then taking care of a wild toddler and sick newborn all day and THEN tell me that you're tired.

I love DH. He's normally really awesome but I feel like every other day he is buckling under the stress of our baby being sick (nothing serious, a cold/infection that's causing some breathing issues), our toddlers needs being his main responsibility when he's home, and sleep deprivation (toddler still wakes up at night and he cares for her). I don't have the option to buckle. I'm tired, in need of a regular time to shower, in need of a BREAK and overall just feeling exhausted. You don't see me complaining or laying on the couch. i don't have that option! UGH!

I'm sick of taking my sweet baby boy to the doctor. First it was high billirubin and he had to have blood draws 4 days in a row and this past week it's been a cold/infection. He's only 2 weeks old and he's been to the peds office 5 times already I just want him to be able to breath and eat and sleep normally.

My nipples are sore.

My hormones are in flux and I'm sick of it.

I wish my mom lived closer. She's 500 miles away and she left the day after Jack and I came home from the hospital. I need her right now.

I wish I had friends bringing meals over for us. I'm struggling to keep up with everything.




Wow. That felt good. Thanks for listening.

Michigan native living in Jersey with my hubby, sweet girl (4), wild boy (2), and baby girl due Dec. 18th! 

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#4 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 08:49 PM
 
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Well, I definitely can commisserate on feeling sick and dealing with more than one.
That sounds sucky and I hope you will be catching up on your naps this week mama .

I decided to cross-post what I wrote yesterday in Organicpapaya's sick two year old thread since it seems to fit this one too:

My son who is 19 months old caught a cold at the house of friends who were watching him while I labored and we didn't realize it until we were home 2 days later.
He had a terrible runny nose and was sneezing all over the place.
By the weekend, he was grabbing his ears and crying...took him in and got him antibx for his first ever double ear infection.
He had already been around the baby of course...giving her kisses and touching her for a few days.
We then tried to keep them separated...my husband slept with our son in another room and I stayed in the back of the house nursing.

Within a day, poor baby girl was coughing, snuffly breathing and sneezing herself.
When she was 7 days old, we had to take her to the ER b/c she couldn't even latch well to eat, was so congested and upset, suctioning w the Nose Frida wasn't helping much and we were scared.
At the ER, they did chest xrays and told us she had pneumonia!!!!
They then proceeded to give her IV lines and draw blood as well which was so unbearable to see.
They transferred her via ambulance to a better ped hospital where she was admitted.
This was all a blurry nightmare for me.
I was alone w her b/c my DH was home w our sick toddler.

The docs there determined she did not have pneumonia *whew*
but had a viral bronchial infection likely given to her by her brother.
B/c she needs to breathe through her nose in order to nurse, they take this very seriously w newborns.
She was observed overnight and thankfully due to me staying awake the whole time...seriously...and nursing/suctioning her everytime she got congested or panicky, she avoided being put on oxygen or kept longer.
We were lucky that she never lost her desire to eat despite the congestion.

She is still a bit snuffly a week later and we have another f/u ped appt. on Tuesday to examine her again.
Its been a stressful past week and if I could change anything, I would have been more vigilant in keeping my son quarantined.
His little cold was a big deal for a newborn.

And on a sidebar, both my DH and I got sinus infections as well during that whole episode last week.
This week is looking up b/c it simply had to after all the fiascos of last week!

Happily married with two tots (babyboy.gif J 10/18/08) & (babygirl.gif T 5/03/10) 

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#5 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 09:30 PM
 
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I feel silly for even venting, seeing I just have one and am about to lose it.

All I can say is that I was not prepared for a newborn. I love DS, but there is so much they don't tell first-time parents (probably afraid to scare us off). DS is cranky. I love him, but he's getting to me. He won't be put down. I had to start sleeping with him on my chest night 1 due to some choking issues, and he hasn't moved since. Can't stand being on his back, or side or stomach as of today. He's evidenty going through a growth spurt, so he's extra fussy and BF hourly. I second the sore nipples!! DH and I are extremely sleep deprived. We have no help, so our house is a wreck. I spoke with my LC today b/c I was worried about the fact the DS was BF so much and sleeping so little (he takes one two-hour nap from about 10-12). She assured me that everything is fine, and that week three is even tougher. Then she said it starts to get better. I cry daily b/c of hormones and fatigue. DH and I are beginning to wonder what we got ourselves into. I know it will get better, it's just really tough being in the middle of it all right now.

Thanks for letting me vent. I know that most of you have it worse than me -- dealing with a newborn AND other kids. More power to you.

Beth - blissfully married to Doug. DS - Liam (5/10) nocirc.gif &  Darcy (2/13). homebirth.jpg waterbirth.jpgNew SAHM & Labor Doula.

 

babygirl.gif Welcome baby girl! Born at home, in the water, in the caul, and caught by daddy. February 24, 2013!  babygirl.gif

 

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#6 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 10:19 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OrchideZ View Post
Well, I definitely can commisserate on feeling sick and dealing with more than one.
That sounds sucky and I hope you will be catching up on your naps this week mama .

I decided to cross-post what I wrote yesterday in Organicpapaya's sick two year old thread since it seems to fit this one too:

My son who is 19 months old caught a cold at the house of friends who were watching him while I labored and we didn't realize it until we were home 2 days later.
He had a terrible runny nose and was sneezing all over the place.
By the weekend, he was grabbing his ears and crying...took him in and got him antibx for his first ever double ear infection.
He had already been around the baby of course...giving her kisses and touching her for a few days.
We then tried to keep them separated...my husband slept with our son in another room and I stayed in the back of the house nursing.

Within a day, poor baby girl was coughing, snuffly breathing and sneezing herself.
When she was 7 days old, we had to take her to the ER b/c she couldn't even latch well to eat, was so congested and upset, suctioning w the Nose Frida wasn't helping much and we were scared.
At the ER, they did chest xrays and told us she had pneumonia!!!!
They then proceeded to give her IV lines and draw blood as well which was so unbearable to see.
They transferred her via ambulance to a better ped hospital where she was admitted.
This was all a blurry nightmare for me.
I was alone w her b/c my DH was home w our sick toddler.

The docs there determined she did not have pneumonia *whew*
but had a viral bronchial infection likely given to her by her brother.
B/c she needs to breathe through her nose in order to nurse, they take this very seriously w newborns.
She was observed overnight and thankfully due to me staying awake the whole time...seriously...and nursing/suctioning her everytime she got congested or panicky, she avoided being put on oxygen or kept longer.
We were lucky that she never lost her desire to eat despite the congestion.

She is still a bit snuffly a week later and we have another f/u ped appt. on Tuesday to examine her again.
Its been a stressful past week and if I could change anything, I would have been more vigilant in keeping my son quarantined.
His little cold was a big deal for a newborn.

And on a sidebar, both my DH and I got sinus infections as well during that whole episode last week.
This week is looking up b/c it simply had to after all the fiascos of last week!
Oh my goodness! this is terrifying! I am so sorry that you and some other mamas are dealing with sickness So unbelievably difficult I am sure. I am sure that you believe me when I say that I am crying for you since my hormones are obnoxious, too.

Maydaymom, HANG IN THERE HANG IN THERE HANG IN THERE!!!! DD was super high needs and it began very early in her life so I totally understand being bewildered and frustrated all at once. It DOES get better, though, I promise you! Is he ok with you wearing him while you get some time to do "stuff" that will make you feel better? I am so sorry you are going through this b/c it is super hard. Have you read the Happiest Toddler on the Block? A super helpful read. There is a DVD for it, too, if reading is not going to happen anytime soon. Actually, I bet you can even google it and find what you need to know.

Much love to ALL!

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
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#7 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 10:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by maydaymom10 View Post
I feel silly for even venting, seeing I just have one and am about to lose it.

All I can say is that I was not prepared for a newborn. I love DS, but there is so much they don't tell first-time parents (probably afraid to scare us off). DS is cranky. I love him, but he's getting to me. He won't be put down. I had to start sleeping with him on my chest night 1 due to some choking issues, and he hasn't moved since. Can't stand being on his back, or side or stomach as of today. He's evidenty going through a growth spurt, so he's extra fussy and BF hourly. I second the sore nipples!! DH and I are extremely sleep deprived. We have no help, so our house is a wreck. I spoke with my LC today b/c I was worried about the fact the DS was BF so much and sleeping so little (he takes one two-hour nap from about 10-12). She assured me that everything is fine, and that week three is even tougher. Then she said it starts to get better. I cry daily b/c of hormones and fatigue. DH and I are beginning to wonder what we got ourselves into. I know it will get better, it's just really tough being in the middle of it all right now.

Thanks for letting me vent. I know that most of you have it worse than me -- dealing with a newborn AND other kids. More power to you.
Try giving your fussy baby gripe water. I get it at Walgreens, and I get the one that comes in the blue bottle. It has fennel, ginger and chamomile in it...

I swear, it saved my life and hers with DD2. She was always fussy, and it ended up being a lot of gas issues. And that stuff worked so much better than Symeth for us.
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#8 of 9 Old 05-19-2010, 11:30 PM
 
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Holy crap khaoskat, I don't know how you're managing all that either! I'm showering and getting dressed and puttering around, but barely leaving our bedroom. My midwife would also be chewing out your dh! I hope you can take it easy some.

Hugs to everyone else, too. This is such a raw, tender time. It's hard. maydaymom, it goes away. It does.

My biggest whine is my other two kids fighting. They're driving me up a wall. And ds is SO LOUD. Maybe sleeps through a lot, but I wish he'd find his inside voice right now.

Em, married to Alex, mom to Samantha (11 yrs) and Cullen (5yrs) and Maybe (5/16/2010) Trying to grow 4,000lbs of produce on .2 acres. See my blog!
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#9 of 9 Old 05-20-2010, 11:24 PM
 
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I really shouldn't be whining because I've been so blessed with postpartum support, but I'm having my baby blues period right now and I need to vent.

I'm irritated with my husband for being superdad for the past few weeks and then deciding to be rude and insensitive this morning, the first day that we're on our own with no help. My house is a mess and nobdoy made food all day, so I have been really hungry and he got mad at me when I asked for his help. He also invited a friend over and didn't tell me. I'm over the visitors for now.

I'm also sick and tired of my boobs being full ALL the time, no matter what I do. The worst of the engorgement is over, but I'm tired of being soaked with milk and getting up at night to pump.

I'm also really tired of the soreness- 10 days postpartum and I feel like it's day 2 again! All the bones in my pelvic area are just so freakin sore.

Some of you mamas are dealing with a lot more, so props to you. Luckily, I have a very mellow baby (so far) and my older kids are doing really well with the transition. I cannot stress how releived I am that this is the case- DS2 was very high maintenance and I almost lost my mind. I hope baby girl stays as "easy" as she is now, but they sleep so much for the first few weeks it's hard to tell!!!

Jessica- married to David- parenting our 3 monkeys- DS #1 (age 7) DS #2 (age 4) and a brand new DD (born 5/10/10)
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