I think I've just given up. I'm totally powerless over this. I've talked to baby, done fear clearing, crossed off everything on the "must do" list, added things and got them done too, done hypnobabies attempts to help baby come out, and it's out of my hands. I just keep releasing her and her birth to a power greater than myself~
My 2yo has been so fussy and clingy, even my 6yo is acting up yesterday and this morning. DH is avoiding me, and I can't blame him, and don't really want his attention right now anyway-I'm just in a foul mood.
I can't help but think the big brothers on the outside are making this little girl want to stay put. And their behavior is making me snarky and snappy. I really want to just sleep for about two days straight. I literally cry when nap time ends every day. Poor little unborn...if I heard the chaos in this house right now, I sure wouldn't want to make any moves towards joining in. In fact a nice muffled watery cocoon sounds rather nice to me at the moment too! And if one more person mentions anything about me being still pregnant, I may end up with my wish of solitary confinement being granted!
I go back and forth between more of a surrendered state of mind and total tears of frustration. Still doing the prodromal labor every night...I think I've lost my plug about 4 times now. And I'm feeling pretty certain that I'm just really fat and have gas a lot that moves my blubber around. I've past my two ultrasound due dates...and don't put much stock in the due date given by my cycle as I only had three periods (still BFing) and they were 20, 60, and 45 day cycles so who knows how soon I actually conceived. I've only gone overdue with my first baby-so-yeah, I'm feeling really done by now!
I've thought of sipping some castor oil like I did last time...but that labor was like a pit induced labor and the more I actually research that method, the more I really want to steer clear of it and hold on allowing my body and baby to find it's own rhythm and labor cycle. MUCH easier said than done right?!! But, I'm still here, induction free...
More on topic though-aren't midwifes great? I went to my appt on Friday and left with so much Zen. I felt empowered and patient and just awesome. I wish I could just meet with them every day and hang out in the house of Zen.
PS-I'm totally busting out my hot water bottle! I didn't even realize that itchy uncomfortableness was my BOOBS until I read your post-now I have brought it to my conscious mind-yowza!
The BIG FAT FULL MOON is Thursday...perhaps the pull will encourage some action...*crossing fingers and toes*