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#1 of 21 Old 06-10-2010, 11:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So...not sure where to post this, or even what exactly my question is. But, here goes:

I've been trying to avoid the use of the bouncy chair. We didn't get one, because I am kind of opposed to them as well as lots of other parental-substitutes like those. This is partially b/c a lot of parents that I know whose parenting styles I do not agree with kept telling me I HAVE to get a bouncy chair. But, maybe I have a misconception about them.

We just got one given to us as a present yesterday. Now that I have one, I kind of want to try it, but I am sort of afraid that DS will like it, and I don't want to get in the habit of plopping him down into the bouncy chair and not holding him.

What are they good for?
Do you use one and if so, when and why?

Thanks,

Jenna

Jenna, Mama to my little sprocket, born at home 5/29/2010
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#2 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 12:05 AM
 
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We have one. I am totally paranoid about flattened head so I really don't like anything where my the back of my babies head could be getting flattened. That said I am glad we have one. I wear or hold dd2 most of the day but sometimes I need to do stuff without her on me... Like eat dinner, clean up messes on the floor or deal with dd1 having a tantrum. Like most baby holders/ entertainers I don't see anything wrong with them unless they are over used.

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#3 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 12:51 AM
 
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DDCC- I had one for DS and will get another one this time. I think that they are really only parental substitutions if they are overused. I thought it was great for a safe place to put baby while I was bathing, cooking over a hot stove, etc. Basically it was a good place to put him when it may not have been safe to hold/wear him. Putting the baby down for a legitimate reason is vastly different than leaving him in the bouncer all day, in my opinion. My little one had a mild reflux problem for a few months and he slept in the bouncer next to the bed, because he could not get comfortable in bed with me. I guess any parenting tool can be abused, but a bouncer can be a good safe place to put a baby for short periods of time.

Congratulations on your baby!!

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#4 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 12:57 AM
 
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Now that I'm on DD2 I've realized it's ok to set the baby down sometimes. It's nice to poop without holding a baby. You could try the chair for situations like bathroom time, doing a quick chore where it's not easy for baby to be in arms or worn, or just when you need to breathe for 5 minutes.

As long as your baby is happy and not laying there in a wet diaper screaming then it's ok, I promise! DD2 actually loves to lay there and kick her legs as hard as she can...it's time for her to stretch out and wiggle and she thinks the fish on it are hilarious.

Momma to Sweet Rosie 7/06, Lost Baby J 1/09 at 12 weeks pregnant, Spitfire Ada born 4/21/10, and Baby Boy due July/August 2013!
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#5 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 01:25 AM
 
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I felt that way with DD1- but then I burned her leg while taking something out of the oven. Thankfully it wasn't a bad burn, but still- I felt HORRIBLE about it!

So they absolutely have a time and place- bathroom, shower, cooking, etc. I think your paranoia about it already ensures that you won't overuse it!

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#6 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 08:56 AM
 
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Agree. There is a time & a place...our bouncy chair is in my bathroom, so I can shower and use the bathroom

Em, married to Alex, mom to Samantha (11 yrs) and Cullen (5yrs) and Maybe (5/16/2010) Trying to grow 4,000lbs of produce on .2 acres. See my blog!
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#7 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 09:43 AM
 
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We actually have 2 of them so we don't have to carry it up and down the steps at bed time. Lilah has such bad reflux (from being a preemie) that she has to sleep in an up right position. So that's where she sleeps. We don't "put" her there while she awake so we're not having to hold her we wait until we get her tired cues and then she gets swaddled up tight and put there, where she goes to sleep for her nap or bed time. When she has awake or play time she lays on the couch or in our laps so we can talk to her. The reason we like to lay her flat for "play" time is so her back isn't constantly curved and has flat time and of course the bouncy is to allow gravity to keep her food down.

Let me tell ya, when she was laying flat to sleep, almost ALL her food came back out and soaked everything under her, and she smelled like puke/spit up 24/7. She does still smell like that most of them time but we're trying all we can (bouncy included) to keep it in more.

Hope this helps mama!!

Tenk ~ happily married with lots of kids

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#8 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 09:58 AM
 
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DDDC-Now I have 4 kiddos, I don't love the 4th one any less than that first one. I use many different tools to help me be a good parent. A bouncy chair was one of them in the first several weeks. I actually used a high chair with no tray very reclined when dd was a few weeks old. I snuggled her in blankets and she could be in the kitchen right next to me while I made dinner.

There are many tools available to help us live our lives and be good mommies. It frustrates me to see any specific object villified as a "bad Mom" stamp.

Any type of neglect to a baby is wrong! But if I can cook dinner and have baby happy next to me in her chair, why should I feel bad about that. When she would become unhappy, we'd do something else.

Now that dd is 6 months she spends time lots of places: a stroller, a wrap, a crib, a backpack, an outdoor pack-n-play, a car seat, a jumper, my bed. I certainly don't leave her anywhere long enough to get a flat head.

Flat heads occur with tons of back time awake and asleep. My babies slept on their bellies and did all sorts of things during the day.

Momma, enjoy this baby and trust your instincts. You can truly drive yourself mad second guessing everything you think other crunchies percieve as wrong.

Mama to 4. winner.jpghomebirth.jpg
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#9 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 10:17 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Pepper44 View Post
Now that I'm on DD2 I've realized it's ok to set the baby down sometimes. It's nice to poop without holding a baby.
Thanks Pepper! I needed that laugh! I choked on my coffee! And hello from a fellow Kentucky mama!
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#10 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 10:58 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks Mamas! I feel much better after reading all ya'lls comments. Now that all my help has gone home or back to work, i have really been struggling to make myself lunch and use the bathroom!

it's like the pacifier.....i don't want to use one but my ds likes to suck all night long, and i am *this close* to breaking it out. i thought i read somewhere that babies should be 4 weeks before introducing a pacifier.....

anyway, i will try him out in the bouncy chair today. i do need a shower after all.....

Jenna, Mama to my little sprocket, born at home 5/29/2010
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#11 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 11:38 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Pepper44 View Post
It's nice to poop without holding a baby.

Lovin' my four-pack: M, S, a different M, and sleepytime.gif me.

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#12 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 02:11 PM
 
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I have two "parental substitutes" that I find essential to my sanity. The bouncy seat (which DD hates) is in my bathroom so I can used the potty along and take showers/get dressed. I also have a portable swing in my kitchen/living area so i can put her down while I cook or do other quick chores (like dishes or carrying laundry) that are hard to do with the sling on.

The rest of the day she spends in my arms or in the sling, sleeping in my bed (sometimes with me, sometimes without). And of course, the carseat if we're in the car- but she hates that too.

Gosh I wish I had a baby who would sit happily for more than 2 minutes. Only one of my three was like that, and it was the first baby so I didn't know how easy I had it, lol!

Jessica- married to David- parenting our 3 monkeys- DS #1 (age 7) DS #2 (age 4) and a brand new DD (born 5/10/10)
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#13 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 03:04 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein View Post
DDDC-Now I have 4 kiddos, I don't love the 4th one any less than that first one. I use many different tools to help me be a good parent. A bouncy chair was one of them in the first several weeks. I actually used a high chair with no tray very reclined when dd was a few weeks old. I snuggled her in blankets and she could be in the kitchen right next to me while I made dinner.

There are many tools available to help us live our lives and be good mommies. It frustrates me to see any specific object villified as a "bad Mom" stamp.

Any type of neglect to a baby is wrong! But if I can cook dinner and have baby happy next to me in her chair, why should I feel bad about that. When she would become unhappy, we'd do something else.

Now that dd is 6 months she spends time lots of places: a stroller, a wrap, a crib, a backpack, an outdoor pack-n-play, a car seat, a jumper, my bed. I certainly don't leave her anywhere long enough to get a flat head.

Flat heads occur with tons of back time awake and asleep. My babies slept on their bellies and did all sorts of things during the day.

Momma, enjoy this baby and trust your instincts. You can truly drive yourself mad second guessing everything you think other crunchies perceive as wrong.

I agree with this 100%!!!! I have 5 kids and love them all the same, but I can't just hold her 24/7, so she loves laying on the couch to play and look around, and I don't think a bouncy chair makes anyone a bad momma at all. We do what needs to be done to survive (an poop )

Tenk ~ happily married with lots of kids

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#14 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 03:16 PM
 
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DDCC -

Bouncy chairs are wonderful for using the bathroom and showering. I also set one up in our cosleeper in the kitchen so DD could watch me cook and play with her feet while I was cutting or using the stove.

Mama to E (12/07) and M (01/11). homebirth.jpg
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#15 of 21 Old 06-11-2010, 06:17 PM
 
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Bella was born 5/31 and is our 7th. I agree with what the majority of people have said about a bouncer/swing in itself is not a bad thing as long as it isnt over-used. I hold Bella constantly throughout the day and can even manage to get a lot done wearing her, but there are times when it is just not safe or practical to hold her. If Im cooking, need to use the potty, (but have already done the nursing on the toiley while going potty thing! LOL Not exactly the easiest situation) mop, or something that requires the use of both arms I set her down in her bouncer. She does like it a lot and will sit there quite happily (ours is made by BOPPY and vibrates as well as plays nature sounds and heartbeat) as long as she doesnt get hungry. I only use it when I have to and I know that Im not being a bad parent by keeping her in a safe spot while I take care of a few things. Sometimes I do feel a bit guilty, but she shares our bed at night, and is a "babe in arms" practically 18hrs a day.

Dont be hard on yourself for using one. They have a definite place in the scheme of things and can be a real help when you need it. Just remember use vs. abuse of one. Im sure most of us cant stand to *not* be holding our LO's for too long anyway.

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#16 of 21 Old 06-12-2010, 12:42 PM
 
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I just wanted to chime in and say that I remember feeling the exact same way with my 1st babe and when I had my 2nd babe I went through terrible guilt because I just couldn't do it without some sort of "parental substitute". Since then (and now having my 4th baby under 5.5 yrs old) I realize that I am here alone, without a tribal community or another set of arms to hold the baby all the time. In our society, some use of those devices is needed in some cases. I think like anything, they get insanely overused. I think that since you are aware of it, you will remain conscious of how often you are using it and won't start using it as a crutch or whatever.

~ Dana ~ Mommy to Madelyn, Jonas & Hudson & wee one #4 due late Spring!!!
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#17 of 21 Old 06-12-2010, 08:14 PM
 
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I agree with most everyone. Reuben is held most of the day but he has times when he'll start to get fussy and his bum is clean, he's fed and I finally realize he's touched out. Not all babies are that way I'm sure but if I just put him down on the bed, the chair or couch or something he's all smiles. He's also preferring to sleep wihtout touching me now. I'm very surprised since I intended to cosleep with him. I guess I shouldn;t be since DH and I have all kinds iof time we like to touch but not while sleeping.

All that to say, the bouncy chair is helpful and something they may learn to really like. Reuben probably spends 10-15 minutes in it 2-3 times a day.

Alicia - Mother to DS (12) and finally expecting another
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#18 of 21 Old 06-13-2010, 03:04 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by baglady View Post
DDCC- I had one for DS and will get another one this time. I think that they are really only parental substitutions if they are overused. I thought it was great for a safe place to put baby while I was bathing, cooking over a hot stove, etc. Basically it was a good place to put him when it may not have been safe to hold/wear him. Putting the baby down for a legitimate reason is vastly different than leaving him in the bouncer all day, in my opinion. My little one had a mild reflux problem for a few months and he slept in the bouncer next to the bed, because he could not get comfortable in bed with me. I guess any parenting tool can be abused, but a bouncer can be a good safe place to put a baby for short periods of time.
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Originally Posted by emnic77 View Post
Agree. There is a time & a place...our bouncy chair is in my bathroom, so I can shower and use the bathroom
I agree with all of these. I have a bouncy seat... I call it my baby catcher. If I need to grab dinner out of the stove or get the pizza delivery at the door, or the sudden-onset peeing emergency, I can plop her down for 5-10 min. and not have to worry that she's safe. She is still very young and nursing a lot, so I couldn't just leave her in there all day even if I wanted to.

But really, if you are invested in attachment type of parenting and being an active parent to your child, don't stress over the "parenting substitutes". After all, it's not like you're gonna go this route.

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I'm a head-covering witchy mama to DS ('06) and DD ('10) with DH, Stormie, a Heathen breadwinning daddy.
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#19 of 21 Old 06-13-2010, 10:11 AM - Thread Starter
 
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wolfcat - that is hilarious, and really sad if it's not a joke of some sort.

we put DS in the chair yesterday to try it and he liked it at first and that didn't last long. he was a total grump the last 24 hours though so we'll try again when he's happier

thanks again, everyone, for the reassuring words

Jenna, Mama to my little sprocket, born at home 5/29/2010
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#20 of 21 Old 06-14-2010, 10:39 AM
 
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We have minimal "accessories" for our kids, but the bouncy chair is one essential.
I hold the baby a LOT but the chair is great because I have a 2yr old and a 3.5yr old. Leaving the baby on the floor is just a recipe for disaster. Now thankfully they haven't taken to using the chair as a catapult - yet.
I'll even let DD sleep in it and take the whole thing outside so I can garden and do other chores. I find she sleeps deeper outside in the fresh air.
Now funnily enough I was convinced that I wanted a swing for this baby. So I got one from a friend - and she's been in it for just a couple naps kind of like when I stocked up on bottles and bought a great pump for DS2...and he never took a bottle lol!

Best laid plans and all...

DH and I - totally winging life with our four children, DS1 (6.5yrs), DS2 (5yrs), DD (3yrs) and DS3 (1)!

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#21 of 21 Old 06-14-2010, 10:55 AM
 
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DDCC-
I only have the one kid, but I still find the bouncy seat pretty useful. And although I know I could live without the swing, I don't want to. She takes her morning nap in the swing (usually, today she's in a carrier because that's what she wants).

The bouncy chair is great for the things the PPs have suggested. I used to keep one in my bathroom (now that she's getting bigger I put the bumbo in there next to the toilet, and she sits in that for the minute it takes me to pee)

My dd is rarely held and happy unless she's asleep. But sometimes she likes to sit in the bouncy and kick and watch things go by. I have even put her in front of the TV while I cook a quick dinner (yes yes, I know... but this is a high-needs kid, and sometimes I HAVE to make dinner, and nothing else will keep her happy).

But, that said, she doesn't spend a lot of time in the chair. She won't let me leave her there long. As soon as she starts crying I pick her up, unless I'm in the middle of something quick, and then she gets picked up absolutely as soon as I hit a stopping point.

I remember when my friend brought us two bouncy chairs and a swing and I thought there was no way I'd need all that. Now I'd love a third bouncy! One for the crib (reflux baby), one for the downstairs, one for upstairs.

Hippie sympathizer and mom to L, 4.8.10.
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