Crazy! Already thinking of expanding family? - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-22-2010, 05:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just wanted to see if I am the only nut who has a few kids and is already talking to dh about the next, lol?!! No, I am not thinking of TTC NOW, but I started thinking about it when the birth control talk came up. I have my 6 week check up soon and I don't want to get the IUD like last time if we plan on having more.

We have 4 kids, and I have had all c-sections My doctor said that my uterus looked great and we could go for a 5th if we wanted, but it's best not to space them too far apart(or too close together) for scarring reasons. 5 is about max we can have for space and health issues.

So am I the only one here already thinking in her crazy head about when would be best to TTC for our last? We were thinking of TTC when this little blessing is close to 2, using natural child spacing. Maybe I just feel like being pregnant again should be the farthest thing from my mind!

: and 3 dd's (5, 4, 17 mos) and anticipating Michaela Skye (after my late daddy Michael.) May 26th 2010
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Old 06-22-2010, 10:50 PM
 
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With both babies this is the time period where I have MOST been lusting for wanting another one right away. I am in newborn bliss. DH and I have had several conversations but with no real resolution. We will wait indefinitely for DH's vasectomy.

I think part of what guides me is that all the family examples around me only have two kids so two kids are the norm for me. Going beyond two is a huge deal. My bil and sil have three kids but the third is an adopted daughter from China whom we adore. I'm seriously considering adoption for this reason.

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
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Old 06-22-2010, 11:51 PM
 
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If you're crazy then so am I. We always intended to have two and have discussed it in various contexts the whole time including when I was pregnant and since J has been born.

Mother of two spectacular girls, born mid-2010 and late 2012  mdcblog5.gif

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Old 06-23-2010, 12:31 AM
 
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I've thought that it would be great. This coming from the woman who didn't start ovulating until 26 months after her last child was born. We're just going to not bother with any BC and see what happens. We'll be fine either way.

Gillian - Wife to an amazing DH, Mother to 5 wonderful kiddos.
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Old 06-23-2010, 03:45 AM
 
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I decided today, that I'm absolutely having another child, eventually. I would like to wait 3-4 years, but as long as I get in 2 years of breastfeeding this time, I don't care when after that. I got pregnant when my toddler was 26 months, and it wasn't long before my breasts were too sensitive and I couldn't breastfeed anymore, I think I was about 6 months when I weaned her completely. By the time the baby came and I could handle breastfeeding again, the toddler had lost interest besides a few times when she realized there was milk again.

jamie. crinkly (not quite crunchy) mama to 3 amazing little girls, an awesome little boy, and a baby girl making her debut at the end of this summer.

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Old 06-23-2010, 11:08 AM
 
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Absolutely NOT!! Lilah is a wonderful baby though! She sleeps well, during the day, at night sometimes wakes once, but sleeps other wise. I'm mentally exhausted though and just can't handle another one. I don't know if it's the PPD/PTSD this time, if it's having 2 under 2 even though my bigs are GREAT helpers, I just don't know what it is. I really don't think my body could handle it again and with the emergency C/S at 34 weeks and dealing with the NICU I just can't even fathom doing this again.

Love my kids, glad their here, no way would we even consider it again though!!

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Old 06-23-2010, 04:16 PM
 
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Sometimes I'm thinking about it, other days I think that there's no way I can handle the newborn stage again! I think we'll probably have one more. Ideally, I'd like to wait 2-3 years. The six year gap between my first and second has so far worked out well, in that ds1 LOVES his little brother and understands a lot more than if he were smaller, but it's been a hard adjustment for me. I was finally getting used to having a child who was pretty independent, and suddenly I'm back in the newborn stage.

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Old 06-23-2010, 05:16 PM
 
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I think about it constantly. I'd be shocked if we didn't go four at least 1 more!
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Old 06-23-2010, 05:28 PM
 
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I dont think your nuts but then again im due in oct and DH and I are already talking about our next pg We have always wanted a large family and slowly 1 kid at a time were getting there! although mainstream society would see us as a large family already. I nurse exclusively and have never been able to get pg during that time until they are solely night nursing (about age 2) so I would think this time around it would be the same.
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Old 06-23-2010, 11:42 PM
 
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oh yeah, my dh said that kai didn't really have the newborn look anymore and i just about died. we do want to wait 4 years though. my dh travels for work and we can go with him (if he has to go for more than 3 mos at a time the company pays for my ticket...which is cheaper than him coming home every 4 weeks or so, which he would do if i stayed home), it would be hard with another baby. right now kai and i can fly together without too much trouble and stay (overseas).
plus: we had a 22 week loss of our 1st child and i don't want to stress about that happening again anytime soon. i just want to enjoy our time together without worry over my reproductive system!

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Old 06-24-2010, 01:36 AM
 
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I always start thinking about being pregnant again when my babies get to be about a month old... of course, I did get pregnant with my second when the first was just 5.5 months old. Now that I'm a better breastfeeder, I don't get my cycles back for at least a year, so we go back and forth over whether or not we want another. By the time we decide if we want to TTC or not, I'm pregnant! DH keeps saying we are done now that all the seats in our van are full (as if that's what we were going for!!)... but I don't like odd numbers... so we shall see, I guess!

Raising our babies: 2003, 2004, 2006, 2008, 2010, and 2012
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Old 06-24-2010, 04:48 PM
 
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I've been talking about it since the baby was 5 days old lol. But we were already planning a third, 3 years down the road, now I feel I just have to convince him that FOUR might be a better number than three you know to avoid odd numbers lol. I do sometimes joke to him "oh good we can get pregnant in 2 weeks (at 6 weeks pp) eheh he just tries to remind me that I will have to give birth again ( When the midwife arrrived when I was in labour, I told her and him - "Remember I still have to do this one more time" and I feel as though this birth went so much smoother than my first that I can't wait to do it again ( see we really do forget )

femalesling.GIFMama to intact DS Dec 06 and intact DS May 10......Looking to declutter 2012 items in 2012! (27/2012)

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Old 06-24-2010, 04:54 PM
 
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I don't think you are nuts however I have no desire to have more then 2 kids. For so many reason's 2 is the right number for us.

Me: Shannon (33) mom to DD Everly born May 9, 2007 and Maisie born May 26
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Old 06-25-2010, 10:13 PM
 
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Bella was born 5/31 and will be 4weeks on Monday. She is our 7th kiddo. I know I want at least 1 more, and dh says he'd like to go for 10. Im not so sure about 10, but definitely will try for an 8th. Im exclusively BF but always get my AF back around 5mos PP. Although we arent actively TTC, I am not on BC (nope, were not catholic lol) and if/when the time is right we will welcome another one.

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Old 06-27-2010, 02:42 AM
 
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Lilah was our fifth and the second water birth that DH got to catch. Her birth was so beautiful and we did so awesome that the first thing out of DH's mouth was something along the lines of "wow, now I get the hang of catching, next time...(something something-my brain started smoking at that point)"

So I know somewhere in there he's open for more. We are however at a place financially where we need to stop and regroup. I am hell bent on finally finishing midwifery schooling so that is first and foremost right now. After that...all is fair

I have to giggle Tenk-my little Lilah sleeps all night too! I cloth diaper and can't stand letting her go the entire time so i get her up for one diaper change in the middle of the night...she's usually blown out poopy and not just wet by then. Of course the wake up makes her nurse again but then she beds right back down. I think co-sleeping helps alot but it is the one thing I literally give gratitude for every single day. Sleep is so so sweet. She is such a "good" baby.

Midwife. Mama to five. Love is still the greatest.
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Old 06-27-2010, 12:09 PM
 
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Another crazy one here I'm already thinking about when to have the next babe. Right now we are being SUPER careful with BC because I am overwhelmed with my 2 under 2. Audrey is 22 months and Jack is 7 weeks. They are both pretty needy. DH would be fine with stopping at 2 kids but I know for sure I want at least one more. He's open to it but wants to wait a few years. I'm on the same page. I can't handle another one anytime soon but maybe when Jack is 2 I'll start thinking about it

Michigan native living in Jersey with my hubby, sweet girl (4), wild boy (2), and baby girl due Dec. 18th! 

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Old 06-28-2010, 12:03 AM
 
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I'm crazy too!!

We'll wait, and be really careful about bc untill I'd give birth AFTER I finish school. So the soonest we'd even be up for trying is April-ish 2011, which would give us a 18 ish month gap. I'm not sure that's what we'll do, but I'm already thinking about when we'll start trying for the next one.

I didn't really enjoy being pregnant- oh how I wanted to!! and I was in labor for 2 days.... but I look at Charlie (4 weeks old) and I think about how quickly he's grown already! and how I still want a large family and for him to have lots of siblings.
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Old 07-01-2010, 05:36 PM
 
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We always said we wanted 3 or 4, and we have 3 now. Honestly, we are just winging it this time. Last two times I had to wean in order to ovulate, so I don't exactly expect anything to happen anytime soon, but we don't mind either way. This 2yr age gap is really nice, but closer would be fine too. I probably wouldn't be so relaxed about the issue if DD wasn't such an amazingly easy baby.

DH and I - totally winging life with our four children, DS1 (6.5yrs), DS2 (5yrs), DD (3yrs) and DS3 (1)!

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Old 07-02-2010, 05:40 PM
 
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I really go back and forth on this. We always wanted 3 or 4. But, honestly, this transitional period from 1 to 2 is not that enjoyable and I'm a little gunshy about doing it again. On top of which is the fact that it'd be nice to be out of the baby stage and start focusing on my own goals again. I know ultimately we will probably have another child, but I look at the person who will decide to do that and kind of think she's batshit crazy.

I also can't decide if it makes more sense to have a small gap again (2.5 years) so as to move through the baby stage faster (not that I want it to go fast, but I am eager to embark on some goals that cannot be embarked upon until children are school-aged) or if I want a bigger gap because I am partial to them, think the transition would be a bit easier, and also could make some progress towards those goals before having to take time off again...so confusing!

robina. unschooling mama and midwifery student.  building my nest with my husband, our daughter (born at home 11/07), our son (home waterbirth 5/10), and our newest little girl (born at home 4/13)!

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Old 07-03-2010, 05:40 PM
 
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No, but not for the reasons you might think. I am 41. We have had to use lots of medical interventions to have our 3 kids. If I was 10 years younger and fertile, I would LOVE to have another one or two, but in this life I am thrilled with the babies I have and accept that there will be no more. If you ladies can do it, I say more power to you!!

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Old 07-11-2010, 10:33 PM
 
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Add me to the list of crazies! The day my son was born I told my hubby that I refused to go through the pain of labor again so one was all he was getting! Well, about 24 hours later, we were already talking about when would be a good time to have another! But we are 29 and 30 and put off having kids for a few years with the thought that we'd hopefully have a few close together.

He wanted to get started the day of my 6 week checkup but I told him I'm gonna need a little more time. Plus doesn't BFing keep you from ovulating? I haven't had a period yet and my son is 8 weeks old so who knows? I've heard from some people that you are more fertile than ever after a baby and from others that I shouldn't expect a period til after I wean. Is the whole "more fertile than ever" thing only referring to people who bottle feed?

Well I am not going back on the pill cause it took me a full year to get regular again after I went off it last time. So I guess it's gonna be the ole "pull and pray" method for us til we decide to really go for it again. Maybe I'll see some of you in another DDC soon?
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Old 07-11-2010, 10:47 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gemini529 View Post
He wanted to get started the day of my 6 week checkup but I told him I'm gonna need a little more time. Plus doesn't BFing keep you from ovulating? I haven't had a period yet and my son is 8 weeks old so who knows? I've heard from some people that you are more fertile than ever after a baby and from others that I shouldn't expect a period til after I wean. Is the whole "more fertile than ever" thing only referring to people who bottle feed?

Well I am not going back on the pill cause it took me a full year to get regular again after I went off it last time. So I guess it's gonna be the ole "pull and pray" method for us til we decide to really go for it again. Maybe I'll see some of you in another DDC soon?
Wow! the 6 week check-up?
If you are exclusively nursing without ever missing a feed at the breast (ie: no pumped milk fed in a bottle), it is a very effective form of birth control for the first 6 months. Like, 99% effective. As good as BCPs! From KellyMom

Rather than "pull and pray," what about reading up on Natural Family Planning? You'll be able to learn when you are ovulating, so that you know when you are fertile and when you're not. It is a very effective method for pregnancy prevention, and when you do choose to go for another, you'll really understand your cycles and fertile times! It's actually not very complicated, and takes only a minute or two each day. "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" is the NFP bible.

OB RN, partner tobikenew.gif and mama to jog.gif (2008, 31 weeker) and babygirl.gif (2011) vbac.gif femalesling.GIF   novaxnocirc.gif  cd.gif

 
 

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Old 07-11-2010, 11:57 PM
 
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We started talking about this last week ourselves.... We definitely want to give Finn the chance of breastfeeding until he's 3 (if he wants to) before we wean to start another round of infertility stuff.

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Old 07-12-2010, 12:26 PM
 
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Um, no. I said my whole pregnancy I am not doing it again, and I have no intention of it. This is our first baby and overall pregnancy was healthy, but I did not enjoy morning sickness, anemia, being huge, etc. DW will carry number two, and we don't plan to TTC for a few more years because we want our kids spaced at least three years apart. I am really really enjoying spending this time with our one baby girl, and I just don't know that it's possible to have this type of relationship when there is more than one kid in the equation. Not to say I wouldn't be close with a second child, but it is really special to have time that it is just us. Also, the thought of being pregnant turns me off. The thought of giving birth (even though my birth was basically a perfect experience) turns me off.

Mama to two, and second-time surrogate. Expecting May 2015.
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