Over 40 due in June? Talk to me... - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 13 Old 11-13-2009, 12:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm wondering how you're doing with this pregnancy... physically and emotionally.

Physically I am feeling fantastic compared to with my dd 18 years ago. I'm tired and have some nausea, but it's manageable. I'm feeling a bit out of sorts in my head tho, like there's a part of me that doesn't believe I'm actually pg yet. Maybe that's not uncommon when you do IVF? My biggest hangup tho is I have this feeling we are going to get bad reactions from people when we start telling, especially my family. We've told very few people, and I did get one bad reaction from a college friend who lives across the country. Literally, he could not say congrats or _anything_ he just sort of moved on in the conversation. I've already decided that anybody who can't be happy for us can just stick it... unfortunately that might be my family. DH's family is ecstatic- they're really the only ones we've told. This is DH's first marriage and their first (and only) grandchild...

Are you telling yet, and what are people's reactions?
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#2 of 13 Old 11-13-2009, 03:24 PM
 
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congrats on your pregnancy...
I am 34 my DH is 41. So I cant help on that but I can offer my support. 40 is NOT old to have a baby. I am in NY and I know lots of Moms who have children well in to their mid forties. Its not about the age as a number but as how you feel inside.
I dont think that having a child will always make every family member happy either. I have 2 children a girl and a boy. My Dad still doesnt get why I need to have more when I have one of each I actually get that alot.
I hope you have a healthy happy 9 months Mama if you need support we are here for you

Shelly, Mom to Sophia 5 Nicholas 3 & 2 Angels
Its a GIRL! Alyssa Ann 6/29/10 7lbs 5 oz
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#3 of 13 Old 11-13-2009, 07:03 PM
 
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I'm not over forty : ) But, I was a surrogate for a couple in their late 40's (similar situation, it was his first marriage and he had no kids of his own). They are the greatest parents in the world!! I think those kids are so lucky to have parents that just wanted to have them so bad. I think that if you have the desire to have a child than who is to tell you that it's right or wrong. Anyone who isn't excited for you, they will come around when they see all the joy you get from raising this little bean of yours. So don't let other peoples judgements dampen your mood.

I think it's great that you are expecting! Congrats!

Heidi in Utah

Heidi, Married to my sweetheart of 13 yrs Kristopher, Mommy of 7 yr old Kairo, Expecting our sweet little girl Penelope 6/26/2010!
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#4 of 13 Old 11-14-2009, 04:17 AM
 
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Literally, he could not say congrats or _anything_ he just sort of moved on in the conversation
Sorry he was so unkind - could it be a "guy" thing? They're not all inclined to be all warm and fuzzy when it comes to babies. It's great that your in-laws are excited

I have only told one of my sisters, she is very happy for me. I am afraid my Mom will be really worried for me and my oldest sister is probably going to disapprove (although she does love babies.) I'll probably wait until after the amnio to tell them anything.

Physically I am nauseated and tired and my pants are too tight.

Lisa DH Pat DS Liam DS Jamessigncirc1.gif

Missing DD Lily 6/17/10- 12/13/12

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#5 of 13 Old 11-14-2009, 12:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Lisa, thanks for writing. My pants are too tight too...

We're going by my mom's on the way to skiing to tell her. Today. I'm so nervous I've forgotten about being urpy. I would wait to tell even her, but she leaves for 5 months in San Diego in a couple weeks. If she has a bad attitude about it she can take it with her and I don't have to deal with it.

I know we're not the only 40 plus mamas on here...!
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#6 of 13 Old 11-15-2009, 12:07 AM
 
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Hope to hear good news back from you about your Mom.

You are going skiing? Have fun!

Lisa DH Pat DS Liam DS Jamessigncirc1.gif

Missing DD Lily 6/17/10- 12/13/12

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#7 of 13 Old 11-15-2009, 07:34 AM
 
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I am on the verge - will be 40 when the baby is born. This is my second and 80% of the days I feel like crap! I can't help but wonder if it's my age because w/ my first I worked a lot, worked out, had a full and busy life. My life is still full and busy but not as much. But as another said here, while 40 is technically considered high risk, it's not like your uterus suddenly says, "hey, we're 40, let's make this hard!" I too live in NY so maybe it's geographical-cultural thing but 3 of my 4 SILs had babies after 40 and they are all healthy beautiful moms and kids.
My biggest bone of contention is that I'll be 8 months pregnant for my 40th birthday - bummer!!! I've been waiting years to have my big surprise birthday party and to reach 2 long term goals - get a hard core girly-girly Harley and run a marathon to celebrate turning 40. Alternative plan - make 41 the new 40. I'll celebrate it a year late. No big deal, I'm usually late for most things!
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#8 of 13 Old 11-15-2009, 01:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Jannk! I had a great party on my 40th- and ran a big race that year too- not a marathon but a 20 mile mountain run. That was my gift to myself.

I wish I had SIL's with kids... that would make this easier. On the best note ever tho, I told my mom yesterday and she flipped with joy. I did _not_ see that coming!!! She was laughing, crying, accusing us of pulling her leg... wow. It's like aliens replaced my mom. She has a history of being aloof at best as a grandma, and when I told her about my first pg she said, I hope you don't expect me to babysit because I'm busy!
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#9 of 13 Old 11-15-2009, 03:13 PM
 
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Over forty mama here! I'm 41. I never thought I'd be pg and 40 but there I was last year with my youngest. I got pg at 39, then had my 40th bday in August, G man was born a year ago October. Fast forward...well here I am again...lol! Now 41 and pg. This is my last baby though, I'm done!

~Yvonne
Mama to nine.

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#10 of 13 Old 11-15-2009, 05:28 PM
 
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BB - I'm so happy your mom was great about it. Mom's can be such powerful people - having one who is on your side makes all the difference. Congrats on your mountain run - I couldn't ever do it - hate hills! Are you running now? i stopped b/c I was getting minor cramps so I'm walking instead. Good luck with everything!
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#11 of 13 Old 11-16-2009, 01:42 AM
 
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Whooo hooo! Glad to hear your Mom has rethunk her grandmomness and now thinks it's awesome too.

Lisa DH Pat DS Liam DS Jamessigncirc1.gif

Missing DD Lily 6/17/10- 12/13/12

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#12 of 13 Old 11-16-2009, 02:43 AM
 
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Originally Posted by mommysaurus View Post
This is my last baby though, I'm done!
how do you know

wife since 1992; mom to: J 7-95; H 5-98; C 2-03; S 4-05; Micah Zachary born still UC 4-08; UM 9-08; due June 2010
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#13 of 13 Old 11-16-2009, 02:44 AM
 
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I was just about to start a thread like this!! I am 40. 41 + a month when the baby is born.

glad to see I am not alone

wife since 1992; mom to: J 7-95; H 5-98; C 2-03; S 4-05; Micah Zachary born still UC 4-08; UM 9-08; due June 2010
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