Last pregnancy sadness??? - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 06:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
Momma2DoubleCuties's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: surrounded in testosterone
Posts: 3,729
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Anyone else in their for sure last pregnancy? How are you feeling?

I am and am so sad I won't get to feel this again. I'm Sooooooooo ready to meet this little person but am also soooooo not ready to close the door on this chapter of my life. I've been thanking my lucky stars I've been able to experience it 4 wonderful times.

Aimee Blessed Momma to 4 amazing boys, P ~ 9 H ~ 7 J ~ 4 and B ~ 1.  Happily married to D Living my almost dream life on an urban homestead, hoping for our forever land to find us soon!

Momma2DoubleCuties is offline  
#2 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 07:26 PM
 
PapayaMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,157
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I could write this post. I am still dealing with sadness. Enjoying every minute of this new person but it is hard not to let the "I will never have a 2 day old again" feelings not creep into the enjoyment. Logically I agree with the decision for this to be our last but emotionally I don't know when or if it will come.

Tracy, Wifey to Jeff . Mama to Maya-Papaya 7/04 and Carolina Bean-a 5/07 and Jack 7/4/10!!
PapayaMom is offline  
#3 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 07:29 PM
 
Surfacing's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: stuck between a rock and a hard place
Posts: 6,690
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Yes, I can really relate. Actually, it was more during my pregnancy with dd2 when I thought dd2 would be our last child that I was really, really mourning. I could not believe I would not be experiencing pregnancy another time, feeling a baby moving inside me, giving birth, breastfeeding, etc.

I am soooooooooooooooooo happy that we decided to have a third child. I think given our lifestyle and the choices we've made, this will really be it. When we had dd2 she was such a sweet, lovely, easy baby we said if all babies were like her we'd have 7! But realistically, based on finances, logistics, time, energy, etc. this is stretching us to our LIMIT.

I too thank my lucky starts that I've been able to experience pregnancy and birth several times. It has been such an intense and profound experience. I considered giving birth to be the most important days of my life.

The truth of the matter is, with my mental health stuff, and all the demands and responsibilities that we face, I feel like it is just wise to stop now. If we had more help going into the future with childcare, and came into a big lottery win or something we would consider continuing. My mother babysat the two kids for us while we were at work over the past 3.5 yrs. This has been a huge gift in a number of ways. One thing is that it allowed us to pay down on some of our student loan debts and free up some cash flow to buy a car. If we had to pay for daycare/childcare for the two kiddos over these past several years we would not have been able to afford to have a third child. I'm not sure that we would have been able to afford a second child.

I am sh*tting my pants now a bit about childcare costs for the next several years but you know what? It's totally worth it.

But again, wrt the spiritual, physical aspects of bearing children... it has been a very special time of life, and a true gift.

Not ready to close the door on this chapter of your life? May I ask why or how you know this is your for-sure last PG?

wash.gif  Me  + bikenew.gif Dh =  broc1.gif  Dd1(9 yrs) + hearts.gif  Dd2(6 yrs) and blowkiss.gif Ds(3.5 yrs)
Surfacing is offline  
#4 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 07:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
Momma2DoubleCuties's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: surrounded in testosterone
Posts: 3,729
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Dh is getting the big V next month. We just are maxed out in so many ways. Our house, car and that sort of things.

Aimee Blessed Momma to 4 amazing boys, P ~ 9 H ~ 7 J ~ 4 and B ~ 1.  Happily married to D Living my almost dream life on an urban homestead, hoping for our forever land to find us soon!

Momma2DoubleCuties is offline  
#5 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 08:35 PM
MJB
 
MJB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: United States
Posts: 1,565
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
This is our last; my husband got a V in May. He had to talk me into a third and neither of us want more than 3. I'm not sad that I won't be pregnant or have a baby again, but I have been feeling sad about my kids growing up. My 7.5 yr. old seems so grown-up lately, I feel like he doesn't need me at all. My littler son is starting kindergarten next month. I feel like they'll be grown and gone before we know it and that makes me sad. I'm really glad that this baby is a girl because I was worried I'd have to give up my dream of having a daughter. I'm sure once I get back into the daily grind of parenting a baby, the empty nest days won't seem so close!
MJB is offline  
#6 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 08:49 PM
 
KatWozBlue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 154
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My dh gets the big V sometime in the next couple of months and I have to admit, I am so glad I am not going to be pregnant ever again , I am D O N E done done done, but I am definitely sad about this being my last baby, I washed some clothes in baby detergent and I am literally sitting here with a shirt on my head smelling it remembering how my two other babies smelled, sigh. But it is time to move on and enjoy what I have.
KatWozBlue is offline  
#7 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 08:52 PM
 
2sweetboysmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Still feeling lost in So.Cal. after 17 years.
Posts: 1,607
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Me too.
With two unexplained 2nd tri losses last year, and this having been a very physically & emotionally difficult pregnancy. We are absolutely done. If I wind up with a (quite possible) c-section, I'll have my tubes tied at the same time. If not then hubby will take the hit and get a V.
We are too fertile for our own good. Even trying to NOT get prego we still managed to do it 3 times in 12 months!!! Emotionally I need to go out on a positive experience and not a loss...Closing up the works for good now means no more miscarriages for me.
If things were easier (pregnancies, and not loosing them) I would totally be up for one or two more kiddos. We will be looking into fostering and possibly adopting in the future, but no more teeny tinys 'till grand babies.

DH&Me  Christ follower, homeschooler, gardener, (insert lots of additional crunchiness here) chicken mama, & occasionally blogger. intactlact.gifMama of  boys 9,7,3.5,&11months....& SURPRISE jaw2.gif  expecting a BOY in November!  7 sweet-babes gone too soon.

2sweetboysmom is offline  
#8 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 09:41 PM
 
Surfacing's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: stuck between a rock and a hard place
Posts: 6,690
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2sweetboysmom View Post
Emotionally I need to go out on a positive experience and not a loss...Closing up the works for good now means no more miscarriages for me.

wash.gif  Me  + bikenew.gif Dh =  broc1.gif  Dd1(9 yrs) + hearts.gif  Dd2(6 yrs) and blowkiss.gif Ds(3.5 yrs)
Surfacing is offline  
#9 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 09:44 PM
 
Manessa's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Salt Lake Silly
Posts: 1,303
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm feeling this way. SO ready to have this baby, and so so sad to never be pregnant again. This pregnancy came after a very hard second tri loss also. I'm glad to be able to leave my baby years on a happy note, but will miss being pregnant.

~Manessa mama to one teenageer, one tweenager, and a toddler

Manessa is offline  
#10 of 12 Old 07-07-2010, 10:10 PM
 
mataji4's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Oregon
Posts: 2,329
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I felt this way all other pregnancies, but this time I'm really okay. We're maxed out in many ways too, and five just feels like enough- for us, for the world! I want to get to Europe someday, and the Caribbean...I'll be 35 in the fall and it just seems like time to be done with all this pregnancy/newborn business. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE babies. I'd have more if I was richer and didn't have varicose veins : ) I also feel my dh feeling maxed out- he works til 6 so he doesn't have a lot of time with them.

JENNY, 38~ preschool teacher, birth activist, sun worshiper, singer, married for 17 years and mom to

Karan 15, Fiona 12, Bodhi 10, Bjorn 6, Devon 3, and Robin Taylor born January 16th!

mataji4 is offline  
#11 of 12 Old 07-08-2010, 03:00 AM
 
Terrilein's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Germany
Posts: 1,593
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I feel really too old for this crap! I am so done, done, done . . . and I wanne tubal to go please. I am looking forward to having this baby and love my dd with all my heart, but I just can not do this ever again.

hide.gif Me 41, single mom to modifiedartist.gifdd 4/2001 and demon.gif ds 7/17/2010

Terrilein is offline  
#12 of 12 Old 07-11-2010, 01:26 AM
 
Sophiasmomma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: NY
Posts: 2,497
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
SIGH.......

well after our DS my DH said he was done.
then we had a suprise pregnancy and were thrilled.. we lost that baby at 13 weeks along.. then DH realized we really wanted another.. had another MC at 10 weeks... we took 1 yr off of TTC then this past september my oldest DD started Kindergarten and I wanted another so badly. By Oct we got pregnant with this blessing.... now shes here and I am THRILLED beyond any feeling Ive ever had we are done now for sure and it is hard to close the door to such an amazing chapter of your life. I mean being pregnant and giving birth to me has is and was such a privledge that my body gave me and it is sad to think it wont ever happen again. But now its time to move foward and count my blessings everyday...

Shelly, Mom to Sophia 5 Nicholas 3 & 2 Angels
Its a GIRL! Alyssa Ann 6/29/10 7lbs 5 oz
Sophiasmomma is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off