Jillian Ruby's Birth Story - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 11:18 AM - Thread Starter
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Two weeks later....

On Thursday the 1st of July I went to my midwife's appt, I had been having bloody show and every night labor would seem to be starting only to stop in the morning for a week. She found me to be 3cm, super soft and 75% effaced, head in place. With my permission she stirred things up and off I went to walk. Thursday and Friday night the contractions would start up around 8pm only to stop at the same time in the morning. Lots of nice bloody show. So Saturday night I decide to go see some kick ass bluegrass (Hackensaw Boys) at a local winery. We leave the winery and as soon as I walk in the front door my water breaks at exactly one minute until midnight (and my edd). Everyone gets excited, my Doula is staying with us she decided to get some sleep, I decided to clean to try and encourage things, my dh decided to drink coffee to counteract the micro brew . I fall asleep in between scattered contractions and wake up to NOTHING but the leaking water. My midwife wants me to call as soon as my water breaks, but I decided to wait at least 12 hours, which I did. When I call, the midwife on call (George, whom I love), listens to me tell him why I am not coming in, the slippery slope etc., he says just come in so we can see what your body is doing, we wont lock the doors or windows. I go in, he checks me and CANNOT FIND MY CERVIX, as in it is sooooo posterior he cannot find it, as in the baby's head is floating so high there is no longer pressure on the cervix, as in the baby must have been doing the gym rope climb up the umbilical cord to prevent her from having to leave the womb ( at this point it is important to note there had been some serious discord between dh and I, so when Ina May says love is what put them in there, love is what you need to get em out I am a believer!). So of course I feel disheartened, my last two births were relatively short, completely natural births. I ask the midwife for time and decide to walk and rest. At around 5 pm, 17 hours from my water breaking, not a contraction in sight, I agree to dance with the devil, start the pitocin and lets do this. The universe must have known I needed to have some more time because the midwife had another more high risk birth to attend so my pit was stopped and with it any contractions went too. A few hours later pit was restarted, and increased at 30 min intervals, as soon as the interval was up my contractions would start spacing, so my body was not cooperating. At 4:30 am on Monday morning, 28 hours after my water broke, with the pit at 15 (maximum is 20), I called for the epidural, bypassing my Doula and dh, as a side note...pit contractions for me started like a horse out of the gate, no warm up just straight to the holy @#$*&#...so after two successful, completely natural births I was exhausted and discouraged and in PAIN!!! The epidural guy came in and my Doula said something about carrots dangling and how I, as a trained Doula, know this...I heard none of it because I did not want to...the epidural went in, I during this process went complete and had to push immediately, 3 pushes later she was born at 0526 on Monday morning...what a waste of an epidural , her head had no molding at all because she floated up until the last moment, she was an 8 and 9 in apgars, alert, thankfully the epidural had no time to dull her, and had a little mucous from not being squished, her umbilical cord was super long...and now at two weeks she is still smaller than any baby I ever birth coming in at 8lbs 2oz, which is 11oz over her birth weight. She is a super mother sucker, I and everything around me smells milky...this, my last birth, was not my ideal and I have some guilt with not waiting for nature but becoming impatient and having my membranes stripped, what if's can be killers, so I am working on releasing my ideals and finding peace with myself and my body...and of course the healthy baby helps...

Nursing student, (LAST SEMESTER!!!)Cloth diapering, cosleeping, breastfeeding mama to 4!!!
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#2 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 11:39 AM
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Wow Mama, what a story. You were writing with some reflection, sounds like you had a little bit of time to process what happened.

We all have our birth wishes and then there's what really happens... you hardly had any sleep, were on the clock, were induced with pit (OUCH!). Only you live inside your body and only you can decide whether the epidural was the right call or not. I find it interesting to note that you went complete once it was in, right away. Well, in my mind, as a trained doula, that is what the epi is for! Exhausted mom, labour not progressing, needs a break from pain and stress, epi, BAM! Complete! From where I'm sitting with limited info, it sounds like it was an appropriate use of epi.

At the end of the day, YOU did birth your baby. You can do it, your body rocks. I hope with more reflection you will not be so hard on yourself.

Enjoy your baby and being a Milk Goddess. Take good care of yourself.

wash.gif  Me  + bikenew.gif Dh =  broc1.gif  Dd1(9 yrs) + hearts.gif  Dd2(6 yrs) and blowkiss.gif Ds(3.5 yrs)
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#3 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 01:24 PM
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Be gentle with yourself, mama. You did what you felt you had to do in the moment and here you are on the other side with your baby. Any real harm done besides not meeting your expectations?

I had a similar situation with my third, with my water breaking and no contractions many hours later. We tried homeopathy and nipple stimulation, and lots of walking but nothing of came of it. I ended up going to the acupuncturist and upon the first needle going in my shoulder started having strong contractions which brought my baby less than 2 hours later! It was crazy, I couldn't believe it was so effective.

JENNY, 38~ preschool teacher, birth activist, sun worshiper, singer, married for 17 years and mom to

Karan 15, Fiona 12, Bodhi 10, Bjorn 6, Devon 3, and Robin Taylor born January 16th!

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#4 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 01:38 PM
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Thanks so much for sharing your story!! I accidentally clicked your post(still not used to using my LH while my RH supports my LO), but believe it was just what I needed to see. I've been avoiding most of the birth stories on here, because I've felt like a failure because my birth didn't go exactly as planned either. I had whole body shakes in between contrx so I couldn't relax, constant vomiting, wouldn't dilate past 2cm, contrx 2 min apart the whole time, so eventually I took a relaxant(also against my DH & doula, but my MW thought it would be just what I needed). That opened me right up, and within 2 hours I had a healthy, alert baby girl in my arms. But still, I also play around with the what-if's.... It's just nice to know I'm not alone. So thanks for sharing and greatly encouraging me today! and to you as you wrestle through this! I'll be thinking of you!

First time Mama, in love with my DH and we're in LOVE with our baby girl!!!
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#5 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 02:10 PM
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Wow, and I thought it was difficult to wait through the little Braxton-Hicks contrax I've been having! To go that long with major labor "symptoms?" Mama, you're a hero in my book!

Congratulations on your new baby, Jillian. I hope you can rest up and enjoy your babymoon!

Wife to a wonderful dh and mom to four beautiful kiddos, dd (3/04):, ds1 (1/06), ds2 (10/08), and ds3 (7/10)
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#6 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 03:10 PM
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That sounds like a real tough situation, and though it didn't go according to plan, in the end it worked out fine for the baby, and you're a super mama. congratulations!

And I love her name!

Amy (34): mommy to DD1 (11/07) and DD2 (7/10), wife, wohm, and wannabe suburban homesteader.
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#7 of 8 Old 07-19-2010, 03:48 PM
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Congratulations mama! Thanks for sharing your story. I agree with PPs, you did what you needed to do! You are amazing! Enjoy your babymoon. Welcome Jillian Ruby (love that name!!!)

mama to dd 2x Our sweet boy is here! 7/27
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#8 of 8 Old 07-20-2010, 01:28 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks to all for the encouragement...as my last birth I wanted this to be the most fantastic, ecstatic experience, the birth of all births, and my training and patience left me. I guilty look at my dd and think, when did YOU want to be born? Have I altered the course of your life by forcing you out sooner? Silly, I guess. still processing.

Nursing student, (LAST SEMESTER!!!)Cloth diapering, cosleeping, breastfeeding mama to 4!!!
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