Who're the Homebirthers? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 03:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've been curious as to who is having a homebirth in our ddc?
I live in a grouping of little towns (rural). I know of maybe four HBer's here--max. I really am grateful to have MDC for HB support. I didn't tell anyone for the first 7 mos because I didn't want any negativity.
There is one hospital and if you want alternatives, you go out of town. I did this with my first two. I had my first at a BC and my second in our truck en route to the same BC. I was taken to a hospital where I had to fight to go home (with threats of CPS if I took dd out of their care). It was horrid. They then tried to charge me for a full delivery and ob care (hello, I had my babe in my TRUCK!)
So what could be worse than that, right? If I can birth a baby in a truck off of a major interstate, why not at home?
My third was born at home with a midwife and attendants. The birth was perfect. I do have a really slow recovery due to having big babies, lots of fluid loss--sort of a shock to my system.
I am planning my second HB with the same midwife (she's awesome and really hands off). My only two glitches are: short births, my last was 4 1/2 hrs (MW lives 2 hrs away) and the fact that my midwife is due to be out of state sept 1-5th.
My midwife is really intuitive: with dd, she felt she needed to change her last appt from a tues to thurs. She came on thurs and then felt like she needed to hang around so stayed with her dd. I went into labor that night.

I'm due on the 28th and am always really close to my date (one came the day after, one three days after, and my last came the day before).

I've really been at peace with this. I'm counting on her intuition of what I need, and my listening to my body to make any necessary changes along the way.

So, what are your plans? Is this your first HB? Do tell!

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#2 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 03:48 PM
 
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We're having our first homebirth. My DD was born in the hospital and while the care I received in labor was fine (although I hated having to get out of the tub to push), the aftercare was horrible. My nurse was mean and they gave me such a hard time about turning down things for my baby. It was not an experience I want to repeat.

Homebirth isn't real uncommon in my area. There are 4-5 midwives who are all busy and book up. I found a CNM that I'm really comfortable with. She's very hands off as well and really lets me set up the kind of care that I want.

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#3 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 03:54 PM
 
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I'm attempting a homebirth for the third time. The first ended up in a c-section and the second I was bullied into transfer at 9cm.

My midwives were horribly unsupportive and for the second birth, downright nasty and manipulative.

I've switched midwives and am using the same doula from my last birth. Hoping we actually stay at home this time.
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#4 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 04:05 PM
 
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I am, I am! We basically had a homebirth last time, just at the midwife birthing center (which is a big victorian house with suites), because I don't feel totally comfortable with the layout of my house, but this time, we actually own and and totally remodelling the little house next door to us, and it feels like it might just be perfect. Or I'll put the birthing tub on my back deck and have the baby in the back yard. That sounds even more perfect, and in the middle of August, the weather should be making me want to be outside anyway! . Just a matter of what the neighbors will think, as last time, I wasn't exactly um, quiet. I had a pretty fast first labor last time, about 7 hours from "oops, this is real now!" to "baby!" I suspect I'll be even faster this time, and I don't want to have to go somewhere else. My labor came on really hard and intense in the beginning, and I think having to go somewhere else slowed me back down. Between that, and knowing more about what pushing is going to need to be like (upright!!!), I am pretty suspcious this will be short and wild.

Co-sleeping, Breastfeeding, EC'ing, Baby-wearing, Homebirthing mama to two fabulous girls 6/2007 and 8/2010
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#5 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 04:27 PM
 
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I hope so.

I planned a HB last time but ended up with a really horrific hospital transfer and honestly don't ever want to set foot inside a hospital ever again. I'll only even consider it if it's a very serious situation.

This time around I'm at least in the UK where HB is offered (at least supposedly) through the National Health System and I'm hoping to be able to have a trouble free HB with NHS midwives. Fingers crossed.

Lisa - mama to Eleanor Rose 01/08 and Saoirse Lily 09/10
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#6 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 04:35 PM
 
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This will be our second home birth! My first labor and delivery was a perfect and beautiful experience! I am hoping this one will follow.

The only downside is DH might be gone with the military and I just quite cant grasp my thoughts around birthing without my rock there for support (and to catch!) ... especially with a not-even-two-year-old running around to add to the mix.

Kourtney, happily married to my soldier and raising ds 7/08 .... dd 7/10..... and ds 11/11

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#7 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 04:50 PM
 
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hoping for our second hb! my first was born at 33 weeks, and had a somewhat pleasant experience at the hospital, but i didn't know what i know now. first hb was VERY amazing, other than i started pushing too soon and am pretty sure had a cervical lip. i'll be checking to see if i'm 10cm and 100% before pushing this time!

SAHM to Hannah (11/04), Cash (02/08), and Adelaide (07/10) dh, Chris.
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#8 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 05:15 PM
 
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This will be my first birth and we're not yet sure but we'll be trying for either a home birth or birth center. We have two birth centers to check out and will decide once we do that. We will have a 3.5 yr old at the time, which complicates things a lot. We have a small house and co-sleep still, so I'm not sure where he could rest if we were laboring in the middle of the night and wanted to be in the bedroom. And, my mom would be the one to take care of DS and my dad would probably come with her. I'm not sure I want all of them in my house while I'm laboring as it wouldn't be easy to have any privacy. I'm more comfortable with my mom there but not sure about my dad. And, there really wouldn't be a good place for them to sleep either. It's so hard when you don't know what time of day it will be at and how long labor will last.

Megan-39, Postpartum Doula, DW to Sacha-40 (18 years together) and Mama to Finn Alexander born 4/2/07 and Zivia Littlewood born 8/23/10

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#9 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 05:35 PM
 
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Me! This will be our 2nd baby but 1st homebirth. I was so excited to find someone who would accept our insurance for part of her payment because I wouldn't be able to do this otherwise. I am excited about it because while my hospital experience wasn't horrible, it certainly wasn't what I wanted. I often found myself thinking "Geez, I wish these people would just leave us alone!!!" So I figured if I could do it vaginally in a hospital with pitocin and restricted movement and all that jazz (eventually an epi at the end because I was exhausted) then there's no reason for me to think I can't do it at home with a doula and midwife who are supportive of my needs. At this point I haven't gotten totally over my fear of the unknown but I'm confident in my body and its ability to birth.
The only issues we have are care for our DS since we have no family in the area and no friends who can watch him on short notice. And also the proximity to a hospital just in case, the area we live in is high-traffic so it would be at least a 25 minute ride if we had to go, even though it's only 11 miles away.

Wife to 8/07, SAHM to DS1 12/08 & DS2 7/10
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#10 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 05:37 PM
 
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Planning our first homebirth here! My first two were born in the hospital with CNM's (second was waterbirth) and were good experiences but this time I'm brave enough to have a homebirth. I know quite a few people here who've had one with the CNM I've chosen and she has a great reputation.

Danielle, 29, wife to Manuel, mom to Ariana (6), Ivy (4), and one , expecting again! EDD 8/29
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#11 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 05:47 PM
 
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I'm hoping for a second hb as well. I've done 2 hospital births and one hb and by far my hb was much better. It was so peaceful and amazing and I felt so close to my baby.
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#12 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 05:50 PM
 
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I'm having a homebirth! I just found out today that insurance will cover it. ds was born in a hospital with every intervention short of a c section, dd was born in a birth center and it was wonderful. I am excited to finally have a homebirth. Somebody mentioned birthing outside which sounds awesome. We just bought our first home on 3 acres and I'd love to stick a big birthing tub out in the grass.
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#13 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 05:51 PM
 
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This will be my 3rd birth and 2nd homebirth. The 1st birth was at a lovely birth center. We have moved since our last child was born so I'm with a new midwife who has been lovely so far.

Live and love with your whole being.
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#14 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 06:00 PM
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This is going to be my second homebirth. I'm hoping it'll be less painful than my last, which was longer and harder than my first. That trend does not need to continue, tyvm. It was still only 8 hours (my first was 6.5) from start to finish so I shouldn't complain.
I'm really looking forward to my boys being there. They'll be 4.5 and 7.5. With the new H1N1 policies, they wouldn't even be able to visit if I had a hospital birth!
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#15 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 06:07 PM
 
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Maybe I'm thread-crashing because this pregnancy I won't be birthing at home (unless I'm really caught by surprise) but I feel like a homebirther-at-heart because my first two kids were born at home. They both had breathing issues and we transferred to a NICU shortly after birth, which is why we're going with the hospital this time. If breathing goes well, I'd like to return to homebirth for future children.

Mama to Peter (3/8/04), Leo (3/12/06), Timothy (7/24/10), and boy #4 due on the summer solstice 2014
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#16 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 06:32 PM
 
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This will be our second homebirth.

''''

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#17 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 06:57 PM
 
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I feel like a little kid. When I saw the thread title I felt like jumping up and down, raising my hand while calling out, "Ooo Me! ME!"

CPMs were in the throws of a legal battle in my state during my first pregnancy. My pregnancy consisted of three "routine" ultrasounds and a few internal exams late in the pregnancy that basically told them the same darn thing every time..I was not in labor.

I had a hospital birth full of interventions. I was induced for convenience and was asked by my OB to not "pick a Tuesday" because those are his days off. I had an extremely humiliating and painful experience with my OB and L&D nurse when he broke my water. After that, I broke down, lost all resolve and asked for the epidural. I was crying and told my cousin and DH that I "didn't want to feel anything else from here on out." I was terrified of what they would do to me.
I could not feel from my waist down, it caused my blood pressure to drop quick, I lost vision and hearing and began vomiting as my son's heartbeat became erratic. The nurse said this was, "Totally normal." and just laid me back and took care of things while acting like I was silly for being scared.
I could not feel to push, had no urge to and never once felt Cain descending or emerging. He was a low forceps delivery.

After that I told my husband I would never give birth in a hospital again if there wasn't a medical reason to. I believe my exact words were something like, "I'll do it on a pile of leaves in the woods before ever coming back here!"

A month later they legalized homebirth midwives.

This time around I've found a fantastic midwife who I adore. It's so personal and like having a friend, mother and midwife in one package. We'll be moving into our new house before this baby gets here so I'll give birth in our new home. Our insurance will more than likely only cover a tiny portion of it but the fee is fairly low and she is very open to working with us and setting up a payment plan that works for our budget.

My family is busy whispering about how nuts I am, I'm sure. But they're very supportive and interested in it all as this is a new experience and idea to all of them.

I could not be more ecstatic! My husband is a little nervous I think due to the fact that he'll definitely be more involved so I think he's feeling the pressure but he is very happy that we can allow this birth to happen how it should this time around.

Wife to a bearded dude.
Mama to DS [05/21/08] & DD [09/16/10] 43 weeks 1 day!
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#18 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 07:01 PM
 
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We're having a birth center birth BUT the "birth center" is just a small house in a neighboring town. We don't own our home and we live in a development with a small amount of parking. I don't love this house. It's temporary until we can buy..It just seemed a better option to have it at my midwive's "center". I'm gonna say that technically it's a homebirth
I had my first three with OB's in hospitals. I had a bad first birth, but didn't know it could be any better..had a great second birth and went into my third birth thinking everything would be just as great. Unfortunately I went into labor in the middle of the night (my other two births were inductions, very convenient times and happy staff) and the hospital was understaffed. My Dr. was busy and I was mainly taken care of my 2 grumpy L&D nurses who didn't listen to anything I said. Long story short, I ended up with a vacuum assisted delivery that I *know could have been prevented had someone listened to me and let my Dr know that I thought the baby was OP (like my other two had been). I left the hospital and told my mother and husband that if I ever had another baby I would go to a midwife and go natural. So far, I am *so pleased with my descision.

Oh and MJB- my best friend recently had problems with the H1N1 policies, too! She had a baby in October and had to get special permission for someone other than the father (who is not involved) to be with her during labor and her two older children weren't allowed to visit! Craziness!

Jamie, parenting w/ DH , DS1 (02/04), DD (06/06), DS2 (09/08) and DD2 born 8/04/10 9lb 1 oz
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#19 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 07:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Whoa! I step away from the computer and come back to a hb party. Yay.
I hear ya on midwife care being so much more personal and humane.
I am hoping to never have to have a hospital birth, tho I know there are valid reasons for doing so.
carry on...

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#20 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 07:58 PM
 
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I'm planning my first homebirth. I've written this on MDC several times before on other threads, so if you have already read, please forgive me!

My first was a hospital birth. It was the epitome of the worst pregnancy and delivery ever. It was military docs. I was misdiagnosed as having severe lupus, subsequently treated with high dosage prednisone which led to needing a 24 hr insulin pump, injectible blood thinners and I had severely low platelets. I went into labor at 34.5 weeks with PROM and severe pre-eclampsia, likely induced by steroids...it caused cushing's syndrome. I was sent alone, well, with a male EMT who was scared I'd deliver in transport) in an ambulance for a 55 minute ride while I was in active labor. When I got to the hospital where they transported me, I didn't want an internal monitor, and was told by the nurse, "Unless you want your son to visit you in the nursing home, you will have a monitor". My BP was skyrocketing, I had no support, no epidural because my last blood thinner injection was too recent (which would have been good in my position since I was terrified and alone) and they kept telling me "I was a very sick little girl". Pretty degrading since I was a married adult, not a child.

I was so determined to get my baby out and be done, that I pushed for less than 10 minutes (first baby) and he was born leaving me with a moderate tear. The OB informed me he was kind enough to leave me with a "daddy stitch" which caused painful intercourse until my next vaginal birth solved that!

He was healthy, though they kept him for "inspections" for over 3 weeks...I ended up taking him AMA. He's a healthy and gifted 12 year old musician.

I then had 1 year of cytoxan chemotherapy treatments. Finally, on the brink of losing my life, I found a naturopath/DO. He tested me, educated me and I went on a strict whole foods diet and supplements, etc. I became healthy and found that the only thing wrong with me had likely been an untreated UTI that lead to kidney damage.....then, the cascade of problems began from the toxic level of steroids.

My second was a hospital birth that was healthy and fabulous. He was 8 lbs 10 oz. My third was transverse with a nuchal cord. They were worried about her and took her by c-section at 37.5 weeks. She was only 6 lbs 6oz. I assumed future children would be vaginal, since my c-section was for a specific issue..nope, hospital wouldn't allow me to VBAC, despite being a great candidate. So, the next one we found an OB/hospital about an hour away, in the neighboring state, and I had a great VBA2C last June.

Now I'm expecting in late August, I'm as healthy as can be...we eat really healthfully, I treat everything at home with no vax/dr visits..so it seems only natural to be home centered in birth, as well.

I love my midwife and how she believes in me, yet isn't ignoring risks. I love that. I am in the process of ensuring I can believe in myself. Years of others telling you to not trust your instincts takes a long time to get rid of....

Sorry it was so long, but figured the DDC should be the place to really show how we got where we are, and why homebirth is such an emphasis of growth for many.

Blessed Christian Wife and Mother to 5 +Oliver James-Our 10 lb 9 oz born Labor Day 2010!
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#21 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 08:04 PM
 
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I tried for a homebirth last time but transferred at 40 hours due to failure to progress. I'm going to try again with the same midwife (whom I LOVE!! ). Now that all the scar tissue has been broken up I'm hoping for a much quicker experience. I figure anything short of 30 hours will be a total cakewalk for me.

My advice may not be appropriate for you. That's ok. You are just fine how you are and I am the right kind of me.

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#22 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 09:06 PM
 
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Homebirther. Dd was a c/s for breech. Ds was born at home in the water. It was awesome.

Kristen, happy wife to Jeremy; Mama to dd (2/04) and ds (8/07) and two miscarried babies (9/05 & 5/06). And beginning to believe a baby may really be coming this summer.
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#23 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 10:09 PM
 
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This will be my first homebirth! My first was in the hospital, no major issues, everything went really well. But I hated the car ride, hated waiting in the ER (you have to go through the ER after hours, and you have to wait for someone in labor and delivery to come down and get you) and hated that 5 nurses rushed in and shoved a tarp under my tush when it was pushing time. So I will labor and birth at home with my husband and son. I can't wait!

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#24 of 72 Old 02-08-2010, 10:58 PM
 
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This will (hopefully) be my second HB. When I was pregnant w/DD, DH pressed for a HB. His mom was a HBMW, and he as well as both his siblings were born at home. Being raised natural, my DH is a bit anti-hospital, anti-western medicine to begin with, so he couldn't really get why you would have a baby in the hospital. After doing my research, I decided to have DD at home and did so after a short, 5 hour, very intense labor. It was a great experience and I'm hoping to do it agian!

My family was very skeptical at first, even giving me a couple of "and the baby would have died" stories, but after the birth they were all about HB. I even overheard my father at his birthday party telling my birth story to a whole table of his friends "and then she flipped to all fours and pow, out came the baby all wrapped in the cord. The midwife just untangled her and that was that." (I wasn't sure if I should be proud to have won him over or somewhat mortified that my birth story had become dinner conversation.) Needless to say, everyone is 100% behind another homebirth this time, which is wonderful.

CD'ing, homebirthing, milk making school teacher. Supporting my family on my income and trying to get out of debt in 2013!
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#25 of 72 Old 02-09-2010, 12:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I hate those stories...I'm always wondering if things could have been prevented with less intervention. (tho i know there are instances...my mom had placenta previa, was in the hosp for 7 wks and then had my sis at 30 wks--I am grateful for the life saving technology, just not imposed on every single birth).

This time around, my MIL (who is anxiety prone) said she watched a twins HB on discovery then said, "don't ever do that to me!" I asked if anything had gone wrong and she said, "no, but watching it really stressed me out."

I haven't told her that I was more likely to hb twins than singles.

caution: one-handed nak

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#26 of 72 Old 02-09-2010, 12:28 AM
 
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This time around, my MIL (who is anxiety prone) said she watched a twins HB on discovery then said, "don't ever do that to me!" I asked if anything had gone wrong and she said, "no, but watching it really stressed me out."
That made me smile because it is the opposite of my MIL. Her reaction was "thinking of you in the hospital for the baby just makes me so stressed out! All the poking and the prodding [shudder]. And drugs you can't even pronounce! And sick people!" I guess it's all in what we know.

CD'ing, homebirthing, milk making school teacher. Supporting my family on my income and trying to get out of debt in 2013!
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#27 of 72 Old 02-09-2010, 01:31 AM
 
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Wow! I love seeing how many of us there are going this route! That's so exciting!!

We'll be having our second HBAC with this babe. After our unwanted/unnecessay cesarean with #1 I was determined to stay as far away from a hospital as I could with our second. We had our midwife, the second attendant was a midwife, our doula was there, my chiropractor was there adjusting me and helping out, my MIL was caring for DS (who came in to breathe with me from time to time, and got to watch DD actually come out!!) It was a dream come true. Absolutely amazing. And on my own birthday!! And I'm a cesarean babe myself, so I got to reclaim my birthright for both my Mother and myself. Oh the power.

So a half our after birth we were all in the room, inlaws, BIL, helpers, and the 4 of us eating birthday cake and listening to sweet music and toasting the wonder of it all.

There is no way I am going back to a hospital birth after that.

Veggie, babywearing, cloth diapering, lactivist, intactivist, 2x HBAC, non-vaccing nurse and doula, wife of my babies' sweet Dada, Momma of 3 with another coming mid summer.

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#28 of 72 Old 02-09-2010, 01:41 AM
 
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Originally Posted by lunarlady View Post

My family was very skeptical at first, even giving me a couple of "and the baby would have died" stories, but after the birth they were all about HB. I even overheard my father at his birthday party telling my birth story to a whole table of his friends "and then she flipped to all fours and pow, out came the baby all wrapped in the cord. The midwife just untangled her and that was that." (I wasn't sure if I should be proud to have won him over or somewhat mortified that my birth story had become dinner conversation.) Needless to say, everyone is 100% behind another homebirth this time, which is wonderful.
I can only hope and pray that someday my homebirth story will be told in the same fashion by my family members. That is a delightful story.

Wife to a bearded dude.
Mama to DS [05/21/08] & DD [09/16/10] 43 weeks 1 day!
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#29 of 72 Old 02-09-2010, 02:45 AM
 
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We are planning our first homebirth after 3 c/s. Yep 3.
My first was an induction at 37 weeks for a pregnancy induced rash. My body was so not ready. I pushed for 3 hours and ended up with a c/s because of malpresentation (he was so crooked!)
My second was a repeat after going into labor on my own the night before the schedule c/s. 1. I wasn't as informed as I should have been and
2. The hospital had a lawyer on retention to "prevent" women from refusing to consent. seriously.

Baby 3 was a bait and switch by the the doctor. At 39.5 weeks when I went into labor he said if I didn't sign the consent he'd drop me right then and there. I was in a new town and new hospital and didn't know what else to do.

This time I have found a wonderfully supportive midwife who believes in my body and me (as do I). I'm totally stoked! DH was surprisingly on board when I mention the idea of homebirth to him. We have done our research and are really excited for this opportunity!

--Erin

Wife to a wonderful husband, mom to 5 amazing boys, 2 m/c and Knox Cornelius our 5th son born at 15weeks 12/3/2011, Lillian Faith our 1st daughter, born at 14 weeks May 19, 2012 (Turner Syndrome). 

 

Compound heterozygous MTHFR and Prothrombin 2 mutation.

 

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#30 of 72 Old 02-09-2010, 03:28 AM
 
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We're having our second homebirth. DS2 was a wonderful home water birth and DS1 slept through the whole thing!

Lisa, mama to A (3/05) and R (11/07) and L (8/10)
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