My DH is way supportive and encouraging but other than my midwife, I have zero support outside of MDC. Breastfeeding the first time around was a huge failure because of this. This time I feel much more confident and determined because I know I have my midwife to call whenever I need help or have questions.
Still, it's hard. My mother is 'supportive' but it's more like..she's accepting and keeps her mouth shut. The same goes for the rest of the women in my family. I am SO grateful to be blessed with people who love me so much and I know that I'm very lucky that they are so accepting of the parenting choices I make that are so different and seem 'strange' to them. So far there has been little to not negativity.
So that IS something I really count as a blessing.
It still leaves me needing some form of encouragement though. I'm kind of making my own way and sometimes I feel very confident and secure in this. Other times, (like now) I feel alone and like there's not that womanly form of support that I really could benefit from.
My family's attitude towards bfing is 'take it or leave it'. To them, it's not a big deal. They know it's important to me and they value that but there's no one who truly understands or has been there, done that. No wisdom is offered or can be because we do things so differently.
I had a hard week and I think maybe I'm just feeling lonely in this. I know I'm very blessed to have the women in my family be so loving and accepting because they really are VERY mainstream and we aren't the crunchiest but we're certainly not the norm. I think now with us having a homebirth and having a second child...it's making it more obvious how different we really are and that virtually, we're alone in many of our lifestyle decisions.
It's been a rough week.
Maybe I'm just craving motherly wisdom from similar minded people.
Is there anyone else who feels alone like this? I feel insecure at times, especially now with this pregnancy.
I'm proud of us doing things our way and making our own way. I love that we are and that our children will see that and benefit from it. I love that we can show our friends a different way as well...maybe educate some people that 'different' is okay...but it's lonely.
I think I'm feeling sorry for myself.
Mama to DS [05/21/08] & DD [09/16/10] 43 weeks 1 day!
So I plan to join the local La Leache group, participate in a childbirth class (to meet other new parents) and I just discovered a play group facility that offers a monthly meeting for new parents-to-be. I am hoping these local options will help me to meet like-minded women/couples. Is there a prenatal yoga/exercise class nearby? I hope you feel better momma, its hard to be a leader for progressive and enlightened parenting.
Also ask your midwife if she knows of anything (or anyone) in your area. Once you start networking with people you may be surprised by how many people you find!
*hugs* I am sorry you don't have the support you feel you need. It can be rough going when you feel like you are all alone. Have you asked your midwife for any suggestions of groups to join in your area? Maybe she even has some crunchy clients, and would be willing to pass on your name to them.
Cheryl, wife to an amazing man, homeschooling SAHM to Gavin 12/03, Rhys 09/06, and Ian Aug 11, 2010.
So yeah. I hear you. I'm in a similar position, only I have no family to speak of. What family I have is crazy and severely abusive and it's really not a good idea to talk to them. Lately this has all been feeling so much worse than usual. I'm really tempted to go write my own post because I feel bad taking over your thread.
I have no advice for you. My life sucks and I don't know how to fix it either.
My advice may not be appropriate for you. That's ok. You are just fine how you are and I am the right kind of me.
caution: one-handed nak
There were a couple of moms on MDC in my area that I did PM but neither of them seemed very interested in getting together or even really keeping in touch.
Ugh, this is so frustrating. I'm glad I have MDC though. You guys really are my most invaluable resource.
Mama to DS [05/21/08] & DD [09/16/10] 43 weeks 1 day!
I am going to be in the same boat once DH ships out for the army, and I am left alone with the kiddos living at a new army base I know nothing about. I just hope we get stationed somewhere that's a little crunchy! *crosses fingers* The really negative part, is we will be moving right around my due date, so it's even more critical to establish friendships quickly.
I wish you the best of luck!! MDC sure has helped give me that added confidence, but I understand it cant fill every need!
Kourtney, happily married to my soldier and raising ds 7/08 .... dd 7/10..... and ds 11/11
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