Grateful Thread - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 06-18-2010, 06:09 PM - Thread Starter
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I just received an email from a close friend. She recently lost her 2nd baby. That's two losses in a year for her. She's only 24 and we've known one another for 14 years. I just can't fathom what she's going through.

I'm sitting here with a 30 week pregnant, round, full belly and a healthy, happy 2 year old boy on my lap. We were able to conceive both of these babies right away, first attempt and we weren't even charting. Both pregnancies have been boring, complication and surprise free for the most part. We have never had to go through the agony of losing a baby.

I forget sometimes that while I'm complaining about how big and bumbling I feel or when I'm overwhelmed because I have a 2 year old and I'm pregnant, waddling around after him that these are GOOD things.

Even the terrible, overwhelming days are gifts. Every pain and ache is a gift and every tantrum our DS throws is a gift. It's hard to see it all that way in the moment but days like these really do make me see how good I have it.

So this thread is about being grateful. I'm grateful that I am big pregnant with you ladies and I'm grateful for the sleepless nights we have ahead of us and all of the struggles that we'll go through with our kids.

I'm also grateful for all the Mamas on here who HAVE experienced loss like that and/or haven't had such a smooth ride as the rest of us when TTC. You're strong women and you are such inspirations.

Wife to a bearded dude.
Mama to DS [05/21/08] & DD [09/16/10] 43 weeks 1 day!
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#2 of 10 Old 06-18-2010, 10:14 PM
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I am grateful for a healthy DD1 and a healthy DD2 on the way....even the kicks and elbows that hurt and make me pee are wonderful reassurance.

Crunchy Christian Wife and Mommy to awesome DH and DD1 (4/25/07) and DD2 (8/13/10)
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#3 of 10 Old 06-18-2010, 10:22 PM
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It took DH and I a year and a half to conceive, counting one M/C. The very next month we were going to start IUI. Then I got the + ... we're grateful, but you know what? That -still- doesn't make it less scary, that still doesn't ease my mind about what happens to my career now, that still doesn't make the unknowns less powerful.

We can't be superwomen, it's OK to be cranky, and ungrateful, and unhappy, and wish this hadn't happened sometimes! I say embrace the ups AND the downs.

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#4 of 10 Old 06-18-2010, 10:38 PM
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Thanks for the reminder! I am grateful for a healthy DS on the way.
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#5 of 10 Old 06-19-2010, 01:42 AM
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It is VERY easy lately to come up with a dozen things that are bothering me at any time (swelling, heartburn, clingy/whiny dd, money issues, etc). Thanks for the reminder to be grateful for my children and my health. Nothing is more important than these things and I am so lucky and blessed!

Also, my oldest dd is 22 years old and living hours away... so I remind myself how fast this time passes. I know that later I will yearn for my little one, sitting in my lap, wanting to cuddle when I'm trying to fold laundry or do the budget. Or following me when I go to the bathroom! I want to be grateful more often, instead of being so task-oriented.

So thanks again! I really appreciate the "be-grateful" reminder, especially since I read that people who think every day about what they are thankful for are much less likely to get depressed.

Happily married mother of DD1 (10/87), DD2 (7/08), and DD3 (8/10)
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#6 of 10 Old 06-19-2010, 05:51 PM
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Thanks for this thread- great reminder, especially needed today.

I am grateful for my beautiful, healthy 22 month old son, who is just stirring from his nap, and for the thrill of meeting this little one in the coming weeks and seeing who will be joining our family.

M, wife to D, mama to J 8/29/08, expecting someone new in July/August
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#7 of 10 Old 06-19-2010, 06:18 PM
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Thanks for starting this, and thank you for thinking of those who have a harder time with family-building. It took us nearly two years and fertility treatments to conceive our first, and for the second it took 6 months, fertility treatments, and an early loss. Still, I'm incredibly grateful to have what we have and that our road wasn't much, much bumpier. I know many people who make our struggles look very small. And without the bumps in the road, we wouldn't have the absolutely perfect girls that we do have. We'd have some other very subpar kids, I'm sure.

And graciegal, I totally hear you on not being able to completely let go of the fear and sadness. I think if you let it go completely, you lose your empathy.

Amy (34): mommy to DD1 (11/07) and DD2 (7/10), wife, wohm, and wannabe suburban homesteader.
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#8 of 10 Old 06-19-2010, 07:30 PM
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I have so much to be thankful for...I don't ever want to take it for granted.

Even the difficulties are blessings to me, as it helps me grow...and to rely on my faith even more.

Thanks for this a woman who grieved ending her own fertility 5 years ago, the two babies we've been blessed with since my reversal are amazing miracles of grace to me.

Blessings ladies!

Blessed Christian Wife and Homeschooling Mother to 10 children including an Air Force air traffic controller, and newborn boy/girl twins!

‘To someone whose god is science, vaccination makes sense. But to someone whose god is God, it is appalling’ - Dr. Golden.
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#9 of 10 Old 06-21-2010, 01:06 PM
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i'm grateful for this thread: to remind me that things can be worse and that heartburn and waddling are a temporary state.

DD: 8/10

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#10 of 10 Old 06-22-2010, 12:27 AM
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I know what you mean about those moments that really make you aware how lucky you are. A friend's sister was pregnant at the same time she was, but found out the pregnancy was etopic. They didn't catch it in time, and the tube ruptured. So now she only has a chance to conceive every other month. My friend has since had the baby, and every time I see her sister holding it, I know some part of her is thinking about that loss, and about how she is still unsuccessful in getting pregnant over a year later. I pray she will get a + soon.

So I am grateful that this little one in my belly is now out of the "danger zone" and could come tomorrow and live a long and happy life. (Not that I want that! Lots of nesting left to do.)

CD'ing, homebirthing, milk making school teacher. Supporting my family on my income and trying to get out of debt in 2013!
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