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-   August 2010 (http://www.mothering.com/forum/540-august-2010/)
-   -   Are you back at work? Or going back soon? (http://www.mothering.com/forum/540-august-2010/1269817-you-back-work-going-back-soon.html)

lunarlady 10-09-2010 01:16 AM

Well, according to my work I should have returned on Monday of this week (October 4) when baby was 6 weeks old. I decided to extend that a little bit, and am going back Wednesday of next week, when DD will be 7 weeks old. She is still so little, sleeping and nursing all the time. It is hard to leave her.

But in some ways it will be good to be back at work, around adults, and with tasks that I can actually check off mentally as being DONE rather than the never ending housework that I struggle with when I am at home all day. But I am not looking forward to pumping, and the constant worry about leaving enough milk for my little one. I also wonder if she is crying, when she is sleeping...all those things that I don't have to wonder about when I'm home with her. So I guess I'm never happy either way!

Since quite a few of us are in the US, and that means 6 weeks paid, I assume I'm not the only one who is returning to the trenches. I'm sure some of you lucky moms can afford to take 12 weeks (or more!), and some of you are SAHM, but for those of us who are returning, how is it going? Are your ready? Do you have all the logistics worked out?

I'll start: No, I'm not ready. I have no idea where I will pump at work, but at least I've tested my pump and it is working, and DD took a bottle for DH, so I know she won't starve. We've hired a nanny (a first for us!) so there will be no drop off/pick up drama, which will be a first since we started this kid journey 4 years ago. So that, at least, is a plus. I do wish, however, that we could afford to have me be a SAHM, at least for the first year.

HaikuMommy 10-10-2010 02:34 AM

I am currently living in California where we have 6 weeks disability followed by 6 weeks of family bonding time if we choose to take it (both are at 40% salary I believe). I am still in that 12-week period, and my heart hurts for you, knowing how hard it will be to go back to work when your little one is still so tiny.

With my first DD, I was able to stay home with her until she was about 22 months, and with DD3 I stayed home til she was 17 months before going back to work 3 days a week. It was very hard leaving them even at those ages.

My position at work was temporary and is no longer open. I hope to stay home with my girls even longer this time. We'll see! It will definitely mean a tight budget.

amyrobynne 10-10-2010 11:00 PM

I don't work outside of the home, but I need to work 2 hrs/day, 7 days/week from home in order for our budget to work. We got our property tax refund the same week the baby was due and it was just about the amount I usually make in a month, so that helped a lot. But I worked until the day before he was born and started back around an hour a day when he was 10 days old. By 6 weeks, I was back to 2 hours. It's fairly crummy. I don't like my job all that much and I usually work between 9pm-12am, but trying to get things done after the baby falls asleep and before he wakes again has been tricky. In a pinch, I can work while nursing but typing one-handed is slow and obnoxious. I'm grateful to not have to leave him, but I'm more annoyed that I need to work than ever because I really feel like I can't do all the things I want to when my evenings have to be spent working. So I haven't been working as much, but that's not really okay either. My husband was supposed to get a substantial raise this fall and I thought I'd be able to cut back my hours, but his employer froze salaries (and raised health care costs) so I can't. I'm really glad his job is stable but I'm pretty irritated at his boss backing out of a promise.

LZP 10-11-2010 10:24 AM

I went back at 10 weeks PP. Our state has no real law about PP leave, so we defer to FMLA standards. I got 8 weeks partially paid due to the C/S. I took 10 weeks off, and am breaking up the remaining leave one day per week for 10 weeks. (According to the law, a person can take FMLA leave in any increment that the employer allows paid time off to be taken, just an FYI for anyone returning to work...)

So, working a 4 day week is better than a 5 day week I suppose, and I'm alternating Mondays and Fridays off. So, a four day weekend every other weekend is something to which I look forward. But it's not enough.

AV is so happy in the mornings, and it's SO HARD to put her in the bouncy seat while I get ready in the morning instead of staying in bed and playing. I feel guilty.

Without co-sleeping, I dont think I would make it. At least she gets extra time with us. And I absolutely love being able to snuggle her up during the night. It makes it just barely bearable.

The housework, like you said lunarlady, is never-ending! When I was home, at least I felt like I had some time (like 15 min!) to get things accomplished. Now, I have NO time for it after getting everything ready for the next day, eating dinner, doing bed time, etc... And I feel guilty, bc I can't be holding, cooing with, and loving up my little one while I'm doing all that. (she isnt that into BW right now, too restrictive on the crazy limbs!)

Well, at least at work I get to eat lunch at a set time, instead of waiting for the 10 minute period that AV will let me put her down and scarf something down.

I'm pumping too, and it stinks. It's do-able, but not great.

I too wish that we could make the finances work to just have me stay home. Or, have a nanny so I dont have to get up so darn early, and only work 3 days a week or something.

Good luck to you all who are going back or are already back. Someone told me it gets easier. I dont believe it.

somegirl99 10-11-2010 12:17 PM

I still have a few more weeks - thank god, because the first au pair we found had her visa denied, we found another one who can't start until after I start back at work . So I will have probably a couple of weeks of working from home without child care, not sure how I will do it. Then a couple weeks after that I will start back regularly (which is partly from home, partly visiting customers). Pumping while at a client site should be interesting (I have a manual pump).

Good luck to all you working mamas!

LZP 10-11-2010 12:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by somegirl99 View Post
I Pumping while at a client site should be interesting (I have a manual pump).
I do not envy that.

If it makes you feel better, I used my Harmony in the car on some country roads this Saturday. (DH was driving.) THAT was interesting! Had to throw the shirt over every now and again for passing cars.

I sometimes think the harmony would be less intrusive and obvious than my big PIS backpack pump. so much less "going on" with it.

atnightingale 10-12-2010 12:27 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by somegirl99 View Post
I still have a few more weeks - thank god, because the first au pair we found had her visa denied, we found another one who can't start until after I start back at work . So I will have probably a couple of weeks of working from home without child care, not sure how I will do it. Then a couple weeks after that I will start back regularly (which is partly from home, partly visiting customers). Pumping while at a client site should be interesting (I have a manual pump).
DDCC. With my first I switched to a job that involved driving to peoples homes when my DD was 8 months and I was pumping. I brought my Pump in Style and bags and cleaning wipes and had a plug in cooler for the car. I had a nursing cover that was useless for nursing as DD considered it a toy, but great for pumping. I pumped in my car but felt vulnerable on the side of the road etc. So I eventually did it while driving with a hands free vest thingy. It worked great and actually didn't make driving hard at all. I just yanked the tubes when the bottles got full and cleaned up when I stopped. I just kept getting visions of a traffic stop, so I drove very conservatively. My point is, you will find your own creative method.

somegirl99 10-12-2010 01:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by atnightingale View Post
DDCC. With my first I switched to a job that involved driving to peoples homes when my DD was 8 months and I was pumping. I brought my Pump in Style and bags and cleaning wipes and had a plug in cooler for the car. I had a nursing cover that was useless for nursing as DD considered it a toy, but great for pumping. I pumped in my car but felt vulnerable on the side of the road etc. So I eventually did it while driving with a hands free vest thingy. It worked great and actually didn't make driving hard at all. I just yanked the tubes when the bottles got full and cleaned up when I stopped. I just kept getting visions of a traffic stop, so I drove very conservatively. My point is, you will find your own creative method.
Thanks!

I will probably have to find a slightly different creative method as I mostly commute by motorcycle (makes my commute shorter because of lanesharing and carpool lanes), and even if I were to drive, a lot of the time is spent on mountain roads that are so windy, I can't even take a drink of water while driving, and anything not well-secured goes flying around in the car.

lunarlady 10-12-2010 11:48 PM

Tomorrow's the big first day back. 7 am to 7 pm. Sigh. I'm already freaking out about pumping. I hope it goes well! Normal days are only 7 am to 4 pm, I just happened to pick the longest day of the year to go back to work (parent/teacher conferences).

amyrobynne 10-13-2010 12:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lunarlady View Post
Tomorrow's the big first day back. 7 am to 7 pm. Sigh. I'm already freaking out about pumping. I hope it goes well! Normal days are only 7 am to 4 pm, I just happened to pick the longest day of the year to go back to work (parent/teacher conferences).
My thoughts are with you, lunarlady! Even as a teacher's spouse, p/t conference days are long and hectic!

LZP 10-13-2010 12:10 PM

Thinking of you today lunarlady!
Just think, it can only get easier from today...

lunarlady 10-14-2010 12:26 AM

Today was crazy. Only managed to fit in two pumping sessions in the hectic day. Ouch, engorgement! And both on the floor of a friends office. I had to sit on the floor or else you could see me through the window. But the VP gave me a key to an unused mobile unit, so now I have my very own private room to pump in starting tomorrow. One less thing to worry about, hooray! And DD took bottles with no issue, so that was good.

Just1More 10-14-2010 01:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by somegirl99 View Post
Thanks!

I will probably have to find a slightly different creative method as I mostly commute by motorcycle (makes my commute shorter because of lanesharing and carpool lanes), and even if I were to drive, a lot of the time is spent on mountain roads that are so windy, I can't even take a drink of water while driving, and anything not well-secured goes flying around in the car.
Sorry...

I am totally ddcc to say rotfl at the thought of one driving on a motorcycle while pumping. That's hilarious!

CallMeMommy 10-29-2010 01:46 PM

I started back last week. I was able to take 8 weeks, 6 weeks paid by work and 2 weeks of vacation. It's not too bad, it's hard leaving him at daycare but at the same time it's nice to be back to work. It's the same one my older son has been going to since he was a baby. Cade's doing pretty good there, so that helps. Pumping is a challenge sometimes, last time I had free use of an empty office on the floor, but now this time office space is at a premium because of a major software change we'll be doing early next year and it's not always free. So I'm having to hunt and scavenge for somewhere to pump some days.


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