Trapped in Limbo - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 3 Old 04-14-2010, 02:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
soulwanderer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 5
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Jamie,

I was wondering if you could give me some insight on an issue that's been haunting me for the past couple years.
I've been seeing someone for awhile and have a good relationship with him, but my son's father is insisting that we should get back together and work things out. This tempts me because if things did work out with my son's father, I could have my family back together and give my son what he deserves (his mom and dad under one roof). However, if I try to make things work with him and it doesn't....then I've put my son through the disappointment of a seperation, and lost a good relationship (with the other person).
Since I'm so afraid of making the wrong choice, I've not been doing anything but worrying about it. Can you tell me what you see with either of these relationships as far as what is going to be best for my son and I?

Thank you so much.
soulwanderer is offline  
#2 of 3 Old 04-15-2010, 03:04 PM
 
IntuitiveJamie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 3,812
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I do not have a good vibe on returning to the ex. At.All.
I feel like this will be such a big mistake. I get where you are coming from on it...having the family back together and all. But it's not going to work, just like the first time around. I do not think your ex has changed. Only on a superficial level. He talks the talk very well and is a real charmer when he wants to be. It's not that I think he is lying. Not to you anyways, but prob. to himself. The problems you two have, have not changed and will not.

The boyfriend is a good man. Good soul. I see this ending in marraige. I feel he will provide for you emotionally, physically and financially. I feel that he does like your child a great deal. I hesitate to say love yet, b/c their relationship def. has a vibe to it of man and someone elses child. And there is just a small resisitance on your Bf's part to totally fall in love with your child. But he will. And he will treat him like a son and be fair to him. He's a good man. Kind. Generous. Uplifting. Empowering.

The other one takes your energy and steals your power, iykwim.

Good luck with your decision, I hope this brings some clarity for you on it. I hope it's what you needed to hear to make a decision.

Mindful Spirit Expo is on April 21 and 22nd. Raise your consciousness!

Intuitive Encounters business merger means discounts for a limited time.

IntuitiveJamie is offline  
#3 of 3 Old 04-15-2010, 07:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
soulwanderer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 5
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
You completely blew me away with this answer. You're so dead on about their personalities that I feel as though you've met them before. You hit the nail on the head when you said that he's probably not lying to me, but to himself. I sense this very much. That's part of what is difficult for me is that I really hate to give up on people when I feel their intentions are good. Like they may get there eventually if they are wanting to. And I do feel very much so that he thinks things will be better and he believes he will try. The "halt" for me is exactly the other thing you mentioned.....that he takes my energy and steals my power. I don't feel he realizes what he is doing to me, but when I'm around him it feels like all my energy goes into him and none comes back.....like I eventually just disappear. And he always has to be in control of every situation. I always wondered though if those feelings I was having were because of my own issues.....like if I were different, more confident and strong, would I feel that way around him? Or is it he that is causing me to feel that way? I've always taken responsibility for our interactions/relationship.
You are right on about the other man as well. He is very much this way. You stated that you see it ending in marriage.....I have another question as to what that would imply, which I'll have to post seperately.
Thank you so much Jamie......
soulwanderer is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off