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#1 of 2 Old 04-30-2010, 03:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Jamie,
Thank you so much for your answer to my last question, it brought me a lot of healing.

My question today is about my relationship. I feel like my fiance and I have grown apart and there are a few key issues such as communication, the fact that he is 100+ pounds overweight and has no concern for his health or well being, and the fact that he doesn't want another child, where as I do. I know we love each other but I don't always feel like we are still the right person for each other.

Please don't think that I am asking this because of his weight, I love him as he is, but health is very important to me, and it's hard to have our core values be so different. I also have to be conscious of the example he's setting for our daughter.

I just want what's best for my family and for us all to be happy... so I guess my question is, what do you see if I stay or if I go? Will these key issues ever be resolved?

Thank you so, so much for your insight It's greatly appreciated.
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#2 of 2 Old 04-30-2010, 06:28 PM
 
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Hello again,
Thank you for your honest question. I value honesty.

I do actually see potential for your fiancee to change. However, I am not certain that he will be with you when he does. In fact, I really feel that you leaving will be that catalyst. And here's the other interesting thing, I think you will end up together in the end. But beware, I am not suggesting that you ultimatum him or leave on the false pretenses that he will change and you will get back together. What I'm seeing is you really ending things b/c your values are too different at this point. Like I said, this is not to 'see' if it will make him change. You really leave. But I do feel that he knows and undertands and totally gets all these things that you constantly talk to him about..or have over the years. It is in him to change, but he doesn't have any reason too right now. He's stuck in the vicious cycle of weight, sluggish energy because of it, lack of motivation in general etc etc. His souls energy is not wonderful at the moment. He will need a catalyst for this change.
But like I said, down the road, maybe even several years, I think you will end up together. But in the meantime I see you leaving and moving on with your life.

*Please remember that all questions are answered here on the forum only. I do not accept private pm's for more information on your question.*
If you would like to leave me feedback, you can do so here:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/member.php?u=59076
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