Custody issue - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 05-09-2010, 08:46 AM - Thread Starter
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I have been divorced for 4 years and we have had a physical split custody of our 8 year old daughter for the last 3 years. (equal days with her) My situation is now changing, I am moving in this summer with my soon to be husband and I have asked her father for full custody on school days. He refuses for her to change school and to not see her during the week days.
To avoid bitter court battle I am about to agree to a different visitation schedule which will still keep us half and half but I am having doubts and concern of what is best for my daughter. On one hand I feel she would benefit so much by having one home with more consistency during her school days, on the other hand she is used to seeing us half the week and her school and the impact of going thru a court battle on her might affect her more....
She may very well make that decision for herself someday and I have consulted child therapists and lawyers and I am confused....
Please let me know your thoughts.
Thank you!

Mama to a daughter born in 2002, and new baby due May 4th 2011!!
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#2 of 2 Old 05-10-2010, 10:49 PM
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I am not seeing the custody agreement changing at all. (the half and half part). I do think she is settled on this way of living and it is her Norm at this point. I do want you to ease up on yourself because I think your daughter is just fine in this situation actually. Stop beating yourself up, this is the way of divorce sometimes. I feel like your daughter is actually quite well adjusted and level headed. I think she has a good head on her shoulders. I think she would be fine with change, but really the energy behind it all, is 'don't rock the boat' at this point.

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