Protecting my son emotionally - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 10-04-2010, 08:50 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Jamie! Me again

The ex has selfishly moved on already. I'm coming to terms with the fact that he doesn't care about my emotions at all. It's my son I'm worried about. He seems to be spending most of his "father-son" time with this other woman, and sometimes her son too. I'm worried about my son - being confused, becoming attached, not being nurtured enough/focused on by his Dad...
I've tried sharing my concerns with the ex, but he refuses to listen to anything I say and just makes me more angry.

Any advice as to how to ensure my son is emotionally protected?

Thanks.
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#2 of 2 Old 10-07-2010, 12:18 PM
 
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Hi DancingAnne,
Always happy to "see" you

I'm sorry your feelings are hurt. Remember not to take anything personally. Even though it's hard! Trust me, when i tell you that whatever your ex is doing is not about you. It may seem so at times, but it's not. People really do live in their own egocentric worlds and the things we do are usually really about us. It takes a strong person to realize that and thus not take anything another person does personally. Let his life, be his life. You left for a reason, so move forward in certainty in that.

As far as your son goes, I am not worried about him. He feels very secure to me (even as young as he is). I sense that he is an understanding little fellow. I feel that with your guidance he will be just fine. He may get attached to a woman his Father is dating. And it may make him sad briefly if they break up. But such is life. People come and people go. Security in your home is all YOU can personally do. You cannot control what goes on in your ex's home. You just can't. So let go of that desire. It's not a fruitful one.
Be the great Mom I know you are and roll with the punches. Teach your son to be kind and understanding and loving. That is all you can do.
I don't think this relationship he is in right now will last anyways. But there will be others. So do yourself a favor and focus on your home life, the things you speak to your child and the guidance you give him in regards to living a respectful life. Kids are raised well in this situation all the time these days.

Big hugs to you!

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