Could someone reassure me please? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 11 Old 11-06-2010, 04:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok, maybe I have FTM syndrome here, or maybe I really should be running to my midwife!

This may sound silly, but I am all worried about the baby. Ok, here goes. Right now I am worried as it is not moving as much. Just a couple of days ago it was super active, and it has been really quiet since. It will still poke back when I poke it (sorry to call it "it", but I don't know the gender). It had been getting more active but has just gone into quiet mode. Even lying on my back or eating is not getting much activity. Is this normal? Maybe it just changed position?....

...Or maybe, maybe I have been a bad mom and harmed it (ok, here is where my brain goes nuts!) So I think about the cold smoked chicken I ate one day forgetfully (well it was my friend's chicken that he, a butcher, killed smoked and prepared, but I forgot that was on the "no" list, then there is my fresh raw milk that I evilly drink every morning, it was a hard call to make, but I believe it to be better for the baby (my own sheep, I milk it and monitor the cleanliness, but what if I missed a speck of something and now the baby has listeria, but haven't women drank raw milk and thrived for centuries before corporate laws and pasteurisation got us?) Or maybe I had a bath that was too warm a couple of weeks ago? Or something.

Anyway, the baby is quieter now and I am worried that I have done something bad. Maybe I am nuts, or maybe a change in patterns is something that I should worry about. I think the responsibility of motherhood is starting to get me: what if I do something wrong?!? I would never forgive myself. So many big decisions and so many conflicting opinions. I try my best (I also try not to be an anxious nutcase but right now I just need to go with and vent - sorry & thanks!).

Ok, that's it. Basically the babies activity has changed and I am all worried. Thanks for listening!

Married to my best friend and delightedly expecting #1 (30 Dec 10)
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#2 of 11 Old 11-06-2010, 05:06 PM
 
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Big hugs! Chances are you didn't do anything wrong. Movement typically changes as you get towards the end and the baby runs out of room. Baby shouldn't stop moving altogether, but you will not feel the same types of movement. My advice to you would be to drink some OJ or other juice and lay down for a kick count, or just start a kick count whenever you feel the baby move.

My baby has been doing some odd things too - usually once movement starts I will continue to feel movement for a long time. Lately I feel some movement and then a long pause where there is nothing, then more wild movement, then nothing. They come in very small spurts.

Just remember your health care provider is supposed to be helping with things like this, so if you're really anxious, call! If they feel that there is cause for concern or want to alleviate your worry, they can schedule an appointment from there. In the meantime try to do what you can to relax (I love Hyland's homeopathic Nerve Tonic and take it on a regular basis lately) and don't worry about food, you're doing fine.

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#3 of 11 Old 11-06-2010, 05:08 PM
 
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My kids got really quiet a few days out of each month while they had their growth spurt. I keep a fetoscope on hand for times when I get nervous though. No harm having your care provider get you in for a quick check.

Homeschooling mom of two plus baby R born December 16 love.gif
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#4 of 11 Old 11-06-2010, 05:42 PM
 
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Sorry you are worried Mama!
My babies slow down as I get closer to delivery.. not as much room to move big movements.
Try the orange juice trick!
To reassure you I drink raw goat's milk from our own goat.. I too know it is handled well and that my goats are super healthy. I didn't drink for the first trimester "just incase". But I know raw milk is the healthiest choice for my family!! So don't stress that you have done anything wrong!
If you have a midwife maybe call her to do a quick heart beat check they will do that for you no problem!

Mama to SDD (12), DD (8), DD (6), DD, (4), DS (3) and new little babe arriving Dec. We are in the process of building our cob home and homestead
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#5 of 11 Old 11-06-2010, 07:41 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mahiisland View Post

...Or maybe, maybe I have been a bad mom and harmed it (ok, here is where my brain goes nuts!) So I think about the cold smoked chicken I ate one day forgetfully (well it was my friend's chicken that he, a butcher, killed smoked and prepared, but I forgot that was on the "no" list, then there is my fresh raw milk that I evilly drink every morning, it was a hard call to make, but I believe it to be better for the baby (my own sheep, I milk it and monitor the cleanliness, but what if I missed a speck of something and now the baby has listeria, but haven't women drank raw milk and thrived for centuries before corporate laws and pasteurisation got us?) Or maybe I had a bath that was too warm a couple of weeks ago? Or something.
From what I understand, the biggest risk to a fetus when it comes to foodborne illness is food poisoning contracted by the mother. Vomiting or diarrhea can lead to dehydration, electrolyte shortage, and blood sugar issues. If nothing you have eaten has led to an illness or symptoms I would not worry about it.

I'm sorry that this is a scary time for you. I think that most moms go through periods of anxiety and uncertainty (especially as we near the end). Sending you my best wishes to feel better (and for a more wiggly baby) very soon.

Mama~Blogger~Artist~Homemaker. Family = DH (married 6 years), baby Elinor, and our puppy Frances.
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#6 of 11 Old 11-06-2010, 11:00 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Gucci&Granola View Post
From what I understand, the biggest risk to a fetus when it comes to foodborne illness is food poisoning contracted by the mother. Vomiting or diarrhea can lead to dehydration, electrolyte shortage, and blood sugar issues. If nothing you have eaten has led to an illness or symptoms I would not worry about it.
I think if it was something foodborne, you would be sick too. I remember with my first there were days of little movement. My second is like that too. I think of them as "growth spurts" type thing, some days they are "awake" more and some days they sleep more, like when on the outside. Ask if your midwife can check the heartbeat for you.

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#7 of 11 Old 11-07-2010, 02:27 AM
 
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everyone has great advice. My baby is also not moving much. which is a big change from about 2 weeks ago. I phoned my midwife and she told me how to do the kick count. i also seen her the next day. ( it was our regular appointment) and everything is fine with the baby.
get it checked if your are worried. The hospital here is great!! they tell me to call or come in for whatever.
thinking of you.
elizabeth

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#8 of 11 Old 11-07-2010, 06:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks mamas! You ladies are so sweet! I think I was just having a pre-parenting anxiety attack, but I feel much better now. I am in great health, so bubs is likely to be too, that makes sense to a relaxed brain lol...

The thing with listeria is that it lists the symptoms, and then says, but some women may not experience any symptoms at all. Well great. A mystery hidden illness that you don't even know you have... But bubs is kicking again like crazy now and I am soooo happy! I think he/she may even have moved head down (was breech) so an extra yay for that if that is the case.

Anyway, feeling better now, thanks for being there for an overly anxious FTM!

Married to my best friend and delightedly expecting #1 (30 Dec 10)
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#9 of 11 Old 11-13-2010, 02:13 AM
 
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I'm really glad you posted, op, I'm up at 3am waiting for baby to move after she had a series of wild movements yesterday morning and then was quiet and not her usual self all day.  Just had toast with honey, moving on to OJ.  I feel somewhat reassured that other mamas have their babies move less and differently towards the end.  Nonetheless, I'm still just awake waiting for her to move.  I don't want to call the midwife at 4 am on a Saturday morning, but I think I will call in the morning to see if someone is around with a fetoscope so I can just have a listen to her heart.  A few other times in the pregnancy she has changed her style of movement and there have been times when she seems to take a few days off, but I haven't felt so worried as I do right now!  Maybe my baby has moved into a comfortable position and she's just really cozy and sleepy!

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#10 of 11 Old 11-13-2010, 04:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mtnlisa View Post

I'm really glad you posted, op, I'm up at 3am waiting for baby to move after she had a series of wild movements yesterday morning and then was quiet and not her usual self all day.  Just had toast with honey, moving on to OJ.  I feel somewhat reassured that other mamas have their babies move less and differently towards the end.  Nonetheless, I'm still just awake waiting for her to move.  I don't want to call the midwife at 4 am on a Saturday morning, but I think I will call in the morning to see if someone is around with a fetoscope so I can just have a listen to her heart.  A few other times in the pregnancy she has changed her style of movement and there have been times when she seems to take a few days off, but I haven't felt so worried as I do right now!  Maybe my baby has moved into a comfortable position and she's just really cozy and sleepy!


Thank you for posting this! My baby has done the same. I'm trying to be rational and tell myself at at 37 weeks, it's completely OK for movement to have slowed down or changed, but the crazy, panicky new mom in me is convinced I did something to hurt her. I know once she's here, there's a whole new set of worries... but I have to believe we'll be ok. 


Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. ~Dylan Thomas

 

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#11 of 11 Old 11-13-2010, 09:05 AM
 
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I too felt the same way yesterday, so I called my midwives and they said come on in.  My MW assured me that it is ok to be concerned and that it is ok to contact them; they said I could stop by everyday if that would make me feel worried.  If I'm worried they are there to help me.  So after not feeling the baby move as much as it was, I stopped by they shook a rattle counted the heartbeats and were able to tell that the baby's heartbeat would increase and then go back to normal.  They checked my amniotic fluid and everything was fine.  I felt so much better.  I learned a lot in that visit and am so appreciative of their concern.  We chalked it up to a growth spurt where the baby will slow down and rest in order to grow, and to the space becoming limited.  The whole experience empowered me!

 

It is ok to be concerned and it is ok to check in.

 

Glad to hear you feel better too


Loving Mom to DD (09/06) and dear friend to DH expecting numero dos en 12/14/2010 hoping for and lots of
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