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#1 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 01:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm due on the 24th, but still haven't announced the pregnancy yet. I guess I'm worried that people won't be happy for us. I have a vague idea that I'll tell around 22 wks, on DS1 first birthday, but I wonder if I can wait that long. I"m already having trouble fitting into my pants, but I'm hoping people will just think I'm getting fat.

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#2 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 01:48 PM
 
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We haven't really told anyone yet. We told my parents on Father's Day weekend when we saw them but we are VERY close with my parents. DH hasn't told his parents yet and doesn't plan to for at least a few more weeks. I'm due on the 26th so I'm almost 11 weeks and he wants to wait until we're solidly out of the first trimester.

I've broken down and told my closest friends but haven't told DH that I told them I mean I HAD to tell someone!!! My BFF was actually the first to know, we talk almost every day so she knew I was late and kept asking so she knew as soon as I got a BFP. Another friend flat out asked me on the phone one day so I had to fess up.

We've already had an early ultrasound and I go in for my second appt next week. I'm hoping after we hear the heartbeat next week DH will be on board with telling people. My pants are all getting really tight so I don't know how much longer we'll be able to keep it a secret!

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#3 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 02:43 PM
 
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I'll be 12 weeks tomorrow and only told people this past weekend. Most of my family knows, but DH's mom and step-dad are in Europe so we'll tell them when they get back in a couple weeks.

I hope that your worries are unfounded and that everyone is excited about the new addition to your family!

Amanda + Steven SAHM to James (Feb 19, 2008) and Alexander (Jan 7, 2011). Lost little ones always in my heart (07/11/2009) (04/2010)
 
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#4 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 02:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'll be 12 weeks tomorrow and only told people this past weekend. Most of my family knows, but DH's mom and step-dad are in Europe so we'll tell them when they get back in a couple weeks.

I hope that your worries are unfounded and that everyone is excited about the new addition to your family!
me too! last time we told our parents and sisters very early 5 wks? And told everyone else around 12 weeks. My dad was wreck the few months he couldn't tell anyone.

I don't think anyone will overtly be horrible, but I just hate the idea of people feeling sorry for me or my son. Also, I want the focus to be on my son for at least his first year-- I'd hate to hear people telling my 9 month old baby-- "oh, you have to be a big boy now."

Right now my brother and sister do know. My sister is very upbeat; but my 20 year old brothers reaction was priceless-- "but why?"

Texmati-- Knitter, Hindu, vegetarian, WOHM. Wife to superdadsuperhero.gif and mom to DS babyf.gif24 months, and DD boc.gif 8 months! .

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#5 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 03:09 PM
 
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I'm 11+ weeks, and I've told three friends and that's it. My sister just had her first baby on Wednesday, so I wanted her to be in the limelight for a while before we tell my family.

I don't expect anyone to get too excited over baby #3, so I'm not in a big hurry to tell anyone. I did send my midwife an email today to let her know since I should probably start prenatal care in the next few weeks.

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#6 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 04:11 PM
 
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I've told people but we were trying to wait til 12 weeks or later to officially announce it or to tell "anyone." Right now, just "key" people know.

Jamie, DW to Jeff, birth and postpartum doula and Hypnobabies instructor.
4 years and 5 IVF cycles in the making, Elliott was born at home in water on 2/2/11.
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#7 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 04:15 PM
 
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We kept it completely quiet until we saw the heartbeat @7 weeks then we told everyone. I can't hide my pregnancies, I pop early. I'll be 12 weeks on Friday and am so glad I don't have to keep it quiet anymore. I've been so stinkin' sick this time around that I need the extra support.

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#8 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 04:26 PM
 
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I'm almost 12 weeks. I've told my parents, inlaws, brothers and grandparents. I wanted to start telling everyone after I heard the hearbeat, but the dr. couldn't find it at my 11 week appointment So, I'd better be able hear it at the 15 week appointment so that I can stop freaking out and finally be comfortable telling people. It's hard though, because I'm starting to get bigger, but don't really want to tell people, so I really just find myself avoiding social situations (which probably isn't good.) I have to go to a pool party this Friday, which I'm really not excited for. I'd rather not have to be in a bathing suit right now.
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#9 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 04:34 PM
 
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@Dejagerw It took FOREVER to hear the heartbeat with DS. We had an appt at 13 weeks and STILL couldn't hear it (at which point I started freaking out) and so went in for a sono and found a healthy very mobile baby.

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#10 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 07:54 PM
 
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We've only told a few very select people (parents, siblings, and DH told 2 close friends - one of them asked him right out last week if I was pregnant and he told him I was).

Next week will be our first appointment with the midwives, and I'll be 12 weeks then. Our first appointment was with an OB/GYN, just mostly to get the bloodwork done, etc while I figured out what birthing center to go with, and I refused the early u/s there. Hoping to hear the heartbeat on the doppler next week, and if we do we will be telling other people after that (and I hope they are able to hear it because we're going on vacation a few days later and I don't want to be worrying the whole time!)
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#11 of 30 Old 07-06-2010, 10:43 PM
 
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We've only told a few people, I haven't told anyone in my family yet. I did see a heartbeat at 7 weeks but I'm still holding off until the 12 week appt this Thursday. I'll be more comfortable telling family then. We won't probably make any major announcements until 20 weeks or so.

Jessica, wife to Greg since 7/04, mama to the rainbow1284.gif Gman 7/06, 3 brokenheart.gif , rainbow1284.gif Asher 1/11 and a wonderful surprise due in August!

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#12 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 12:39 AM
 
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I haven't told anyone...except my midwife. My dh has told a good number of people but i made him wait until after Sal's first birthday party. I'm sure people just think that I'm getting fatter and that it's, unfortunately, gathering in my abdomen. I'm pretty plump so it would horribly bad manners to mention it
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#13 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 12:56 AM
 
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I haven't told anyone...except my midwife. My dh has told a good number of people but i made him wait until after Sal's first birthday party. I'm sure people just think that I'm getting fatter and that it's, unfortunately, gathering in my abdomen. I'm pretty plump so it would horribly bad manners to mention it
That's funny. I'm normally pretty scrawny... so I imagine people will notice if i don't tell them soon. I just look "fluffy" but since this has never been true, it'll probably seem odd. We plan to tell after our first u/s on the 23rd.

Bri helpmeet to Chaise mama to K(2/07)  M(3/09) & A(2/11)

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#14 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 08:25 AM
 
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We've been pretty mum so far. I like to wait until the first trimester is over. My neighbor knows because I've been REALLY sick and she was about ready to take me to the ER one day (DH was on military duty) so I had to spill the beans. But we're about to announce soon and I can't wait.

And if they say anything about the spacing of our children, they can shove it. lol

A supportive military wife and mama to my busy boy and sweet girl.
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#15 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 08:33 AM
 
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I'm 14-15 weeks (depending on if you believe me or the ultrasound lol) and we have still not told a lot of people. I have told 3 close friends, my mom, our kids, and my dentist. The in-laws haven't even been told yet. I think I'll be putting it up on my facebook page soon but I have to wait until DH tells his parents (since I'm not doing it!) Oh and I have to tell my brother and his wife - that one I'm kind of excited to tell since she has been wanting us to have another baby forever - she will be really happy about it

Kelly (35), married to DH and living happily with DD (8), DS (6), DS (3) and introducing brand new baby James b. 1/5/11, always remembering ~Joseph~ b/d March 10, 2001. 
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#16 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 11:32 AM
 
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I'm 12w2d, and we've told a few people - my best friends, our parents and sisters, and my partner told his co-workers (there's only 3 of them).

My mom has been begging me to let her tell other relatives and her friends, so I gave her the go ahead last night, after my midwife appt and we heard the heartbeat loud and strong.

I'll probably wait another couple of weeks to make a big announcement on fb, or to start telling people we bump into /casual acquaintances.
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#17 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 11:53 AM
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Well, everyone has pretty much know since the beginning - and I only told three people: DH, my Mom, and my Dad.

DH and my Mom are both blabber-mouths, though so within a day pretty much everyone in the known universe had been told - except for my in-laws.

They know now. I got a phone call from my new FIL this weekend during which he yelled at me for "tainting" his family's lineage. Whatever, dude.
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#18 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 12:20 PM
 
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I told everyone after our first doctor's appointment at 8 weeks. I just couldn't keep it secret.

Wife to my love Ted, and Mama to DS  ('09)    DD  ('11)  DS ('12) love.gif!


 

            

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#19 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 12:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We've been pretty mum so far. I like to wait until the first trimester is over. My neighbor knows because I've been REALLY sick and she was about ready to take me to the ER one day (DH was on military duty) so I had to spill the beans. But we're about to announce soon and I can't wait.

And if they say anything about the spacing of our children, they can shove it. lol
maddie may! It looks like our kiddos will be about the same distance apart! I too am dreading the remarks about spacing.

Texmati-- Knitter, Hindu, vegetarian, WOHM. Wife to superdadsuperhero.gif and mom to DS babyf.gif24 months, and DD boc.gif 8 months! .

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#20 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 04:23 PM
 
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maddie may! It looks like our kiddos will be about the same distance apart! I too am dreading the remarks about spacing.
Ours will be give or take a few weeks a year and a half apart. I'm slightly terrified!

But seriously, I am not taking anyone's crap over the spacing of our children. I am usually one to fake it and smile, but not with this. If they aren't going to be happy, they can either shut their trap or I'm not talking to them. I'm taking it as advice from "my" midwife-Ina May (gosh, how I really wish she were my midwife) says that positive thoughts are important for VBAC success.

A supportive military wife and mama to my busy boy and sweet girl.
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#21 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 04:42 PM
 
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They know now. I got a phone call from my new FIL this weekend during which he yelled at me for "tainting" his family's lineage. Whatever, dude.
I saw your post about your FIL's reaction on another thread too, and I don't know if there is a thread somewhere devoted to this, but that is awful! I can relate - my MIL thinks I am the spawn of Satan. She seriously thinks that it is my life's goal to tear her son away from her, instead recognizing that her insane behavior is the real cause. She doesn't know that I am expecting yet. Then again, she and DH haven't talked since Mother's Day, when she hung up on him. She did send a package recently, Certified and Return Receipt requested, as well as Restricted Delivery for my husband only. He had to go to the post office to pick it up. It was a short, happy note that gave no hint of the ongoing row they have been having since January, as well as shirt and some fireworks for my DD. DD is two. MIL's point in sending it Restricted Delivery was that I wasn't trustworthy enough to not dispose of her package without telling DH that it had arrived, I guess. DH threw it in the trash anyway and emailed his mother not to send anything Restricted in the future.

Don't let crazy people get you down!
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#22 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 04:44 PM
 
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I saw your post about your FIL's reaction on another thread too, and I don't know if there is a thread somewhere devoted to this, but that is awful! I can relate - my MIL thinks I am the spawn of Satan. She seriously thinks that it is my life's goal to tear her son away from her, instead recognizing that her insane behavior is the real cause. She doesn't know that I am expecting yet. Then again, she and DH haven't talked since Mother's Day, when she hung up on him. She did send a package recently, Certified and Return Receipt requested, as well as Restricted Delivery for my husband only. He had to go to the post office to pick it up. It was a short, happy note that gave no hint of the ongoing row they have been having since January, as well as shirt and some fireworks for my DD. DD is two. MIL's point in sending it Restricted Delivery was that I wasn't trustworthy enough to not dispose of her package without telling DH that it had arrived, I guess. DH threw it in the trash anyway and emailed his mother not to send anything Restricted in the future.

Don't let crazy people get you down!
Now I have heard some strange IL stories, but that one takes the cake!

A supportive military wife and mama to my busy boy and sweet girl.
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#23 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 05:08 PM
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I saw your post about your FIL's reaction on another thread too, and I don't know if there is a thread somewhere devoted to this, but that is awful! I can relate - my MIL thinks I am the spawn of Satan. She seriously thinks that it is my life's goal to tear her son away from her, instead recognizing that her insane behavior is the real cause. She doesn't know that I am expecting yet. Then again, she and DH haven't talked since Mother's Day, when she hung up on him. She did send a package recently, Certified and Return Receipt requested, as well as Restricted Delivery for my husband only. He had to go to the post office to pick it up. It was a short, happy note that gave no hint of the ongoing row they have been having since January, as well as shirt and some fireworks for my DD. DD is two. MIL's point in sending it Restricted Delivery was that I wasn't trustworthy enough to not dispose of her package without telling DH that it had arrived, I guess. DH threw it in the trash anyway and emailed his mother not to send anything Restricted in the future.

Don't let crazy people get you down!
Oh-kay . . . your MIL is pretty out-there (I'd say more, but I'm afraid of risking a UAV).

The craziest/stupidest thing about my FIL's rant is that I converted to Judaism - LAST YEAR.

That and he's an evil, spiteful, little man whose only mission in life is to make my DH feel like crap. Can you tell that the two of us don't get along?
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#24 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 05:32 PM
 
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We're only telling very select people. You know, the ones that won't say anything dumb, or the ones that absolutely NEED to know for some reason. We've never really been blessed with people that are happy for us, so each time, we've just told them later and later. Maybe we'll tell the in-laws sometime before the baby is born.

He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.  ~Albert Einstein
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#25 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 05:48 PM
 
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This pregnancy was a big shock for us, so we told immediate family and a couple of really close friends early on just because it had overtaken our lives so much that everyone would have thought we were insane or something if they didn't know why we were acting weird and emotional. Besides, it's great to have the support.

Thinking about telling extended family and friends and community soon-ish, but... I don't like people looking at me like I'm pregnant, so I'm putting it off for awhile. We'll probably tell some older relatives soon who might not make it to the baby's birth.

Really wondering what I'm going to say to my boss...

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#26 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 06:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I saw your post about your FIL's reaction on another thread too, and I don't know if there is a thread somewhere devoted to this, but that is awful! I can relate - my MIL thinks I am the spawn of Satan. She seriously thinks that it is my life's goal to tear her son away from her, instead recognizing that her insane behavior is the real cause. She doesn't know that I am expecting yet. Then again, she and DH haven't talked since Mother's Day, when she hung up on him. She did send a package recently, Certified and Return Receipt requested, as well as Restricted Delivery for my husband only. He had to go to the post office to pick it up. It was a short, happy note that gave no hint of the ongoing row they have been having since January, as well as shirt and some fireworks for my DD. DD is two. MIL's point in sending it Restricted Delivery was that I wasn't trustworthy enough to not dispose of her package without telling DH that it had arrived, I guess. DH threw it in the trash anyway and emailed his mother not to send anything Restricted in the future.

Don't let crazy people get you down!
We should have a thread! That is an impressive MIL story!

Texmati-- Knitter, Hindu, vegetarian, WOHM. Wife to superdadsuperhero.gif and mom to DS babyf.gif24 months, and DD boc.gif 8 months! .

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#27 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 06:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ours will be give or take a few weeks a year and a half apart. I'm slightly terrified!

But seriously, I am not taking anyone's crap over the spacing of our children. I am usually one to fake it and smile, but not with this. If they aren't going to be happy, they can either shut their trap or I'm not talking to them. I'm taking it as advice from "my" midwife-Ina May (gosh, how I really wish she were my midwife) says that positive thoughts are important for VBAC success.
You're trying for a vbac too! I'm already getting comments about how "next time will be so much more peaceful since you will just schedule a c-section" Thanks mom. Really.

I didn't plan this. I just don't want to hear crap about weaning DS, that I should schedule a section, that DS will need to sleep on his own... ect.

At the same time, I really need my mom's support.

Texmati-- Knitter, Hindu, vegetarian, WOHM. Wife to superdadsuperhero.gif and mom to DS babyf.gif24 months, and DD boc.gif 8 months! .

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#28 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 09:16 PM
 
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We should have a thread! That is an impressive MIL story!
Yeah, except when it is actually happening to you/your SO, it is a lot less funny. I would much rather have a normal MIL relationship, and much rather my DH have a less manipulative mother. *Sigh*

Actually DH talked with his mom today, ironically enough. He told her about the pregnancy, and she said congratulations. So, kudos to her on that one!
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#29 of 30 Old 07-07-2010, 11:05 PM
 
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I'm 11w2d and up until this weekend only family knew, but pretty much all of them, most since we heard the heartbeats and found out about the twins back at 6w4d, it's amazing to think that was over a month ago!

This last weekend we came down to a big festival that I work at and have grown up at, so this was also our big coming out transition. It's been fun, but also a bit weird since i don't look preggo yet. I have noticed I have to stop unconsciously sucking in my gut, it's reflex of years of carrying pudge there. When I let it all hang out I feel fat, not really preggo, but it will have to do. I know something must be babies, cause I have gained about 8 pounds.

It's been interesting to see folks reaction, these are my first babies and I don't think folks think of me as a mothering type. I've gotten some of the best reaction from these big strong guys that I work security with, they tend to treat me like they sexy little sister, and get pretty protective while still flirting shamelessly. They for the most part as a whole group have gotten all gushy over the news, headless to say it was not what I was expecting!

partners.gif 2twins.gif  So what if I don't fit cleanly into a defined parenting style, my kids don't fit into a personality archetype either!

 
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#30 of 30 Old 07-08-2010, 12:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yeah, except when it is actually happening to you/your SO, it is a lot less funny. I would much rather have a normal MIL relationship, and much rather my DH have a less manipulative mother. *Sigh*

Actually DH talked with his mom today, ironically enough. He told her about the pregnancy, and she said congratulations. So, kudos to her on that one!
no I agree... My toxic MIL actually lives with us, and I"m jelouse of people who live in a different city than their inlaws. I have a son, and I promise him almost daily that I will not be a horrible MIL.

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