Potty training the toddlers - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 05:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know there are several mamas with toddlers on the cusp of PL. How is it going?

My son seems to be showing more of an interest in it lately. He enjoys being bare bummed and did excellent yesterday at peeing on the potty. He's not quite there on the pooping but he was right near the potty so I quickly popped him over the potty. He peed on the floor just once in the evening yesterday.

But then today he peed on the floor and then later on the couch. The floor I can shrug off but the couch just really isn't fun!

I'm unsure of at what point do we get away from diapers during the day. I have some training pants for him that aren't the most absorbant or waterproof so I have hesitations about having him wear them while we are out and about. Plus he's still at the point of "if there's any cloth on my bum, going in it is acceptable".
Any tips on moving forward?

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#2 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 06:36 PM
 
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My DD is 3 1/2, and I ask her - do you want underwear or diaper? Most of the time now she chooses underwear. Then I remind her that if she chooses underwear she needs to pee in the potty, and she gets that. However sometimes she does ask to pee in a diaper, so I let her. Since she is older, I have noticed it's a control thing - Like "I want to know it's there and I have that option" IF she has that option she is okay. If I push the potty thing and say there are no more diapers, she starts crying and is visibly upset, like distraught upset. And I don't see the point in making her upset over peeing - you know?

She still refuses to poop on the potty. I know she is much older than most kids, but she would get visibly upset if I attempted potty training any other time. And treats, rewards, stickers, getting excited, etc, never seem to phase her.

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#3 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 10:42 PM
 
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My 2 1/2 yr old daughter will put on panties from time to time, but has no interest in the potty.

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#4 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 10:53 PM
 
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I was lucky when I had DS... DD decided a few weeks before she was just going to use the potty and didn't wear another diaper for MONTHS. At some point she stopped being night dry, and now I put one on her for nap and bed time. She wakes dry a lot. But better safe than sorry. DS doesn't seem ready, really. Though he's taken an interest because K gets a chocolate chip whenever she uses the potty. He's only 19 months, so I don't feel the need to rush him. 2 in diapers wont kill me. Even if it's no fun.

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#5 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 10:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My son is just over 2 years (25 months). I know we're still a bit on the early side considering PL age tends to be around 3 years. I'm not pushing it but definitely wouldn't mind it happening. Especially since the waterproof layer of 4 of our Fuzzibunz is breaking down - they're not especially old so I'm pretty disappointed.

I did buy him some undies but he has peed in them. My mistake might have been buying undies that were like daddy's. Recently we walked by some girl undies and he said "Ni hao". (Daddy puts on Nick Jr a tad too much.) Maybe if he was more fond of his undies, he wouldn't pee in them.

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#6 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 02:40 PM
 
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My daughter turned 2 in Sept. and is potty trained for daytime. At night, we put her in a diaper, because she sleeps in our bed and we don't want a crinkly mattress cover in there. We used the warm summer weather to have her go without a diaper, or anything on bottom (mostly dresses). She did pee on herself a bunch of times, and pooped in the yard a few too !!! She didn't like the feeling of going down her leg, and quickly caught on to the potty thing. We let her "squat pee" in the yard or while in nature, which is so fun to her. I think we were just lucky to try it early enough that she isn't fighting for autonomy with this issue, it was kinda established by the time the NO and ME phase settled in. I've read the average age for training now is 37 montsh, but in the 50s it was 18 months. Crazy...but maybe those awful rubber pants made it more agreeable for the kids. I think if you are willing to pay close attention to your toddler for a few days, and spend some weeks cleaning pee off the floor, they'll go for it. We used a sticker wall for reward for a while, but didn't really need it. If she didn't like that, maybe I'd have tried her favorite treat, gummies.

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#7 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 03:55 PM
 
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I got lucky and my son basically trained himself. We had been putting him on the potty before bath for a few months and I had been offering it more often too (like during a diaper change, I'd ask him if he wanted to go) and in the morning his diaper was always dry, so I started putting him on the potty in the morning too. We went on vacation over labor day weekend, and he stayed dry the whole time. We came back and it was undies all the time. (He had some trouble with the poo for a couple weeks, but now he's got that down.) He was 22 months when he trained.

However, I got by new cloth diapers for baby #2 and DS1 said "I want to put one on!" I'm crossing my fingers he doesn't want his diapers back when DS2 comes.
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#8 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 04:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emily11megan View Post
I've read the average age for training now is 37 montsh, but in the 50s it was 18 months. Crazy...but maybe those awful rubber pants made it more agreeable for the kids.
I've read similar statistics which is why I think it is possible for my son to catch on. I suspect parental motivation might be a factor in the major age difference: disposables eliminate diaper laundry making diapering easier (although more expensive). A three year old is easier to potty train than a 18 month old who often needs parental assistance to potty.


My son did poop on the potty the other day so that was a big thing. Although yesterday he ended up pooping in a diaper before naptime. I don't plan on making the leap to diaperless sleep for a while since we also cosleep.

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#9 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 06:44 PM
 
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I don't know ... while I do agree that it's possible to get younger toddlers out of diapers, I think that the process is generally a lot longer and a lot more stressful for both parents and kids when it's done so young. I've known so many people who "start to potty train" their kids at around age two, and it takes weeks or months to get the kids out of diapers.

On the other hand, older kids (2½-3½, say) can generally be "trained" over the course of a weekend. My personal strategy is to wait until they're in that older range, then set a date for diapers to be gone and stick to it. Of course there's some protesting (and plenty of peeing on the floor), but I've never had it take longer than a couple of days before it's a done deal.

I think the biggest problem for kids is the sometimes-diapers/sometimes-not ... there's no way for them not to be confused by that mixed message.

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#10 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 06:59 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by allisonrose View Post
I've read similar statistics which is why I think it is possible for my son to catch on. I suspect parental motivation might be a factor in the major age difference: disposables eliminate diaper laundry making diapering easier (although more expensive). A three year old is easier to potty train than a 18 month old who often needs parental assistance to potty.
I also think maybe families had more kids that were closer in age, or just more kids to be able to emulate/watch. Also I think there were more people involved in watching kids (like grandparents, older family members, etc) I know in my family, my dad's father and my mom's mother lived with us, my oldest sisters were 13 years older than me, and I always had someone around, so it was easier to potty train because more people were involved.
I think I was the only one in my family in disposables.

Now I started training DD when she was 18 months and she went a couple of times in the potty and I thought - hey, cool, I trained my child, I did a good job, LOL! Then when she decided she wouldn't go in the potty anymore- it was upsetting to both of us.

She is 3 1/2 and just "got" it and it happened within in a few days. No accidents, and even last night, woke up in the middle of the night before she peed to tell me had to pee, so she is overnight trained. She almost always woke up dry, maybe has had 5-10 times since she was 18 months where she peed overnight in her diaper, but she woke up last night before she peed - so I consider that being trained and not just the coincidence that she can hold it for 11 hours (because well, she can hold it a long time during the day too)

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#11 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 09:00 PM
 
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When I had my second my first was almost two and very near going to the bathroom by herself all the time aside from most #2. However, when my son was born (she was 2 years 6 days old) she decided she wanted to be like the baby and use diapers.

Oh well it gave me an excuse to use her cute cloth longer right?

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#12 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 09:19 PM
 
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I have a few friends whose LOs trained at 18 months-2 years without any accidents (well, almost any), and in all of those cases the parents swear that it was the kids who just one day decided that they were ready. They're also ALL younger siblings, so I think there is an aspect of wanting to emulate an older sibling.

I also have a few friends who started to really encourage PLing at about 18 months, without the kids really showing any interest, and all of those kids continued to have daily (or more) accidents for months, even a year and a half or so.

I think that, honestly, it's mostly developmental and there isn't much parents can do about it. Getting my DD interested in the potty was a complete no-go, and we tried everything (including just cold turkey taking away diapers... she peed on the floor every time she needed to go for a few days until we finally just cut our losses and went back to diapers). Then one day when she was a few weeks into 3 years old she walked up to me and handed me the diaper she had been wearing and said "I want to use the potty." And since then I can count on one hand the number of accidents she's had, including at night.

I think it's worth it to try PLing early, but I also have no regrets in personally waiting. Watching so many friends really struggle with their kids having CONSTANT accidents while the parents insisted that they were ready was kind of disheartening, and even though the parents were definitely no-blame and supportive I just felt bad for the kids. For the most part, these are pretty "crunchy" parents who told me again and again about how in the olden days everyone was trained at 18 months and it wasn't until the 1990s that Proctor and Gamble said to wait and so everyone did. FWIW, my mother says that's total BS... I potty trained at 3, my little sister at 2.5, all of her friends' kids potty trained between 2.5 and 3.5 (often later for boys, she says). She also said that I probably wouldn't be comfortable with a lot of the potty training methods used when she was a kid and parents really rushed to get their kids out of the sub-par and labor-intensive cloth diapers that everyone had to use back then. (Cloth diapers have really come a long way, somewhat ironically since fewer people use them now!) Also that while she hears a lot of criticism about night time pullups, they've gotta be better than the rubber sheets kids slept on before they existed!

Trying to live a simple life in a messy house in a complicated world with : DH, DD (b. 07/07), DS (b. 02/09), and DD (b. 10/10)
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#13 of 16 Old 10-24-2010, 12:41 PM
 
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My son is 2 1/2 and knows what it's about. But I do ask him if he wants to wear diapers or underwear and occassionally he says underwear. I remind him he has to go in the potty if he wears them. We always try to get him on there before baths & before bed & sometimes nap. I have carpet everywhere & 3 inside dogs so I'm prob a bit paranoid about the mess & covering by the dogs. My bff swears she just let him go naked over a weekend & after that he was pretty much good to go- w/ some accidents. I think we need a step stool in the bathroom b/c he can't get up ther eon his own & prefers the potty seat on a normal one, compared to the lil one that can go anywhere.

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#14 of 16 Old 10-25-2010, 02:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My son has been doing pretty well at using the potty while wearing nothing below the waist. But hubby doesn't seem to like him running around like that while he's home. So my son was in diapers all weekend. A couple of times he said "pee pee" and peed on the potty but frequently his diaper was already wet.

Not only do I take care of the majority of the diapering, all of the cloth diaper laundry and prep but I have to potty train my son while dealing with the obstacle of my hubby in the way? Doesn't seem fair.

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#15 of 16 Old 10-25-2010, 02:56 PM
 
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I never quite get the urgency for potty training. I've always found it so much easier to have a child in diapers when we're out, instead of having to frantically run to the potty at the drop of a hat.

My kids have all switched from diapers to potty on their own time table. I really think it's just another developmental milestone. And, with all of those types of milestones, when it's the right time, the process will go (relatively) smoothly. The same goes for weaning, sleeping through the night, sleeping on their own, etc. If it's not the right time for that child, then that's when you run into conflict, imbalance, frustrations, and upsets. When it is the right time, it will practically happen without you doing much of any training, teaching, or learning -- I promise.

On a side note, we've always used a flip type of potty seat like this: http://www.amazon.com/Mayfair-86CP-0...8029212&sr=8-4. The kids love it because they can use the big potty but pull down their seat so their little bums actually fit. No need for a separate seat or a bulky attachment.

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#16 of 16 Old 10-29-2010, 11:58 AM
 
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DS has been potty trained during the day for a year now but we're still trying to get him to poop in the potty instead of in a diaper when he needs to go during nap time or during the night. For some reason he just doesn't like to poop in the potty and will only do it once every couple weeks. He loves his undies though and is so proud of himself when he goes in the potty (even a year later lol). I keep saying that someday he'll do it!

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