When do you plan on telling everyone? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 12:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've already told a few close friends and we plan on telling our parents sometime in the next few weeks. If something does happen I'd like to have a little support group...but I think if I don't tell anyone I'll jinx it...lol

And how are you planning on telling your parents? I'm trying to think of a cute way. I want to get bibs that say "grandma" and "grandpa"...but I'm not sure how to present them lol

Sara <3 Brad Mother to 2 boxers and 2 cats! #1 Due in May!!
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#2 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 12:25 PM
 
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We are going to try to wait until Christmas to tell our parents. I don't know if we will be able to wait that long, but we won't get to see them in person before then AND I love the idea of surprising them when I'm already 20 or so weeks along.

I have to a handful of close friends of mine to be praying for this little one (we've had two losses already this year).....but I think I'll be waiting until after the sonogram next week before I tell anyone else.
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#3 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 12:31 PM
 
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We've told more people than we planned...we're excited! Immediate family and about 8 close friends total. We swore them to secrecy...so hopefully, they listen!

We'll tell everyone else either 7 weeks (when we hear the heartbeat) or 13 weeks.

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#4 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 04:35 PM
 
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We've already told my family, and I've already told some friends.

I was just so excited, and we tried for so long ...

We're waiting until we see DH's parents next weekend to tell them. I'm having my beta numbers retested, and hopefully it'll be good news. If my numbers end up going down (), we might not tell them at all.

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#5 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 06:27 PM
 
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We found out this morning and have already told our close friends, both of our families and DH told everyone at his work, lol. We like to talk to much to keep our mouths shut.

Mama to two lovely boys and a new baby due mid-May 2011
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#6 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 07:04 PM
 
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Since I have had a few miscarriages after my last birth, I'm being more cautious as to who I tell yet. I don't want to have * that* convo with everybody, if the worst happens! I'm beginning to truly doubt a loss tho.

So far I've told my best friends, and my mother. My kids are already starting to ask questions about why I'm eating so much, etc.. I figure I will tell them within the week, and tell the rest of my friends and family around the 8 wk mark. {I'm around 6 wks, tomorrow.}

~Sadie fly-by-nursing1.gifintactlact.gif  guitar.gif sewmachine.gif - mom to dd 9/15/01, ds 11/12/03 {ubac}, and ds 4/29/2011, wife to Mitchell.  pos.gif coming soon in late June!
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#7 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 08:18 PM
 
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I have told some online friends and a couple of friends who I've happened to see/be in touch with but don't see often (it came up, and I couldn't help myself ). We think we might tell DH's family at Thanksgiving (October - I'm Canadian) because we will all be together. Not sure about my family...it will depend on whether they're planning to visit in the fall.
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#8 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 08:42 PM
 
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I plan to wait until as close to 12 weeks as possible.
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#9 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 10:26 PM
 
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Since I am 37 my miscarriage risk is about 20% so I'm going to wait till 3+ months.
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#10 of 61 Old 09-03-2010, 11:42 PM
 
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I'm only 31, but at just 3.5 wks along so I'd say my m/c risk is still close to 30%. We might tell close family a few wks down the road, but will probably wait until the first trimester is over. We had an early loss a few months ago, and was SO thankful that we didn't have to tell anyone.
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#11 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 01:46 AM
 
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I've told close family and friends. I've had 2 miscarriages this year. The first we told everyone immediately that we were pregnant. It was hard when we miscarried because everyone knew and felt bad for us...but at the same time, with our second we hardly told anyone..and I think that may have been harder in a way....trying to pretend I was "fine".

This time we told close immediate family and friends. I feel comfortable with the choice...and if I feel the urge to share with others, I will. Just not my entire place of work or on facebook or anything like that for a long long while.

Tara, mama to Addison (4/07) and brokenheart.gif 03/20/10, brokenheart.gif05/27/10, and our newest addition and  rainbow1284.gifbabygirl.gif Emerson Rae (4/27/11) uc.jpg, married to John
 
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#12 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 04:27 AM
 
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Since I am in my 20s and no history of m/c, I will probably tell people soon (got my this morning). I've always wanted support in case a m/c happened.

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#13 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 08:36 AM
 
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So far I haven't told anyone, but my husband is the blabbermouth haha He's told his boss and another couple. Last pregnancy, the wife of said couple was only three weeks further along than me. We were awesome pregnancy and newborn buddies. This time, she has a seven month jump on me.

I'm definitely nervous about telling everyone. It's just so early and if something happens I don't think I could stand the looks of pity. We'll probably hold off telling as long as possible.

Mom to one amazing little girl (32 months now!), 3 cats and 2 dogs. Wife to my hardworking hubby of 4 years. belly.gif again after 2 losses.  fly-by-nursing1.gifcd.gif  familybed1.gif

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#14 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 10:42 AM
 
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I def haven't announced it on FB yet. I don't think I'll do that until the second tri, or else late first tri. As far as telling in person, I think if I did have an m/c, I'd want my close friends to know. I'd def need support.

Mama to two lovely boys and a new baby due mid-May 2011
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#15 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 10:50 AM
 
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Originally Posted by slb1107 View Post
I've already told a few close friends and we plan on telling our parents sometime in the next few weeks. If something does happen I'd like to have a little support group...but I think if I don't tell anyone I'll jinx it...lol

And how are you planning on telling your parents? I'm trying to think of a cute way. I want to get bibs that say "grandma" and "grandpa"...but I'm not sure how to present them lol
Already told my family and in-laws but no friends yet. For me and DH's family, we took a picture of our son holding a bag of tator tots(our nickname for our kids) wearing a cloth diaper!. My nickname growing up was tator, so tator tot is a baby of course. We took a picture of the tator tot bag in the oven with a diaper on (bun in the oven) and made a mr. potato head family. The newest baby had no arms or legs, just eyes. Sounds creepy but it was cute

My inlaws all got it right away, but my family thought we were just being silly and one of them acutally thought DH and I were drunk and being stupid. lol. Anyway, I had to call my sister, and brother to explain it to them.

I told DH by having my DS write a note that said "I'm a big brother" and we stuck the note in the back of the potato head (DH proposed to me this way by hiding the ring in the back of the potato head)

We are telling everyone else by having DS wear a shirt that say's "big brother" and posting the pic on facebook. I'm having a hard time keeping the secret from my friends, but because I don't really feel pregnant yet, I don't want to jinx it by telling the whole world yet.

DH(9/04) DS(12/08) and DD(5/11)

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#16 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 10:54 AM
 
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I've told close family and friends, as well as my two closest work friends. I'm five weeks along and I'll start telling the world next week because my belly is starting to pop out already and people will probably guess anyway if I don't. I've had m/cd before, but those were both before this point so I feel pretty confident.

Melissa Andrew dd1 dd2 dd3 and
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#17 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 11:05 AM
 
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I def haven't announced it on FB yet. I don't think I'll do that until the second tri, or else late first tri. As far as telling in person, I think if I did have an m/c, I'd want my close friends to know. I'd def need support.
That's how I feel. I haven't announced on FB. Though I am having an early u/s, and I might tell after seeing the heartbeat since the risk of miscarriage plummets after that. I've told at least family and/or close friends about every pregnancy in the 1st trimester. I ended up losing 2 of those pregnancies, and it was really nice to have people who knew. Even though it was hard to tell them the sad news, they were really great for me. One came right over with a Hershey bar, my favorite Chinese, and a chick flick.

Since I am having my beta numbers retested on Tuesday, we'll wait for those results before telling DH's parents. (I've already told my family.)

@ slb1107 - When we were pg with DD, we got the grandparents each an "I love my Grandpa/Grandma" bib. This time, to tell DH's parents, I got an "I'm a big sister" bib for DD. I plan to "ooops, I forgot to get a fork/cup/napkin/whatever" for a meal and have MIL the bib to put on DD. I can't wait for her reaction!

DD#1 dust.gif (May '08); new sweet baby girl (May '11) vbac.gif
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#18 of 61 Old 09-04-2010, 11:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yeah I'm not telling the Facebook world for a while. I've figured out what I wanna do for our parents. I've made a photo frame that says "Baby T" May 2011 in the frame. It's real cute!!!! I'm a big scrapbooker so it's got my special touch on it..and they can keep it forever. =) We're telling them next week.

Oooh I took another test haha..the line was darker than the control line!

Sara <3 Brad Mother to 2 boxers and 2 cats! #1 Due in May!!
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#19 of 61 Old 09-05-2010, 02:15 AM
 
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We are telling our parents tomorrow! This will be the first grandchild for both of our sets of parents so we know they are going to freak with happiness. We were going to wait another week but can't due to his family being out of town. Which really stinks because it was going to be on GRANDPARENT'S DAY! We are still going through with my idea, which is to give them Grandparent's Day cards from the baby saying "See you in May!"

As far as telling others, my best friend knows and that is it. I think we will announce it tomorrow to our close group of other couples that live in town that we see all the time. I thought about just telling the women of the group (who knew we tried for the first time last month) but I know they will tell the guys, so we might as well tell everyone! I feel pretty confident about this because we see these people all the time and share a lot so I know I couldn't keep a happy face up if something happened. I would need their support for sure. I must admit I was feeling more confident until I noticed so many on this board have had miscarriages. Apparently they are more common than I thought , which makes me nervous.

DEFINITELY telling everyone mum is the word on Facebook etc. I will try to keep from making that status update as long as possible!
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#20 of 61 Old 09-05-2010, 07:38 AM
 
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We waited until DH's family found out to go "facebook official" lol. He tried calling them all day yesterday and finally got hold of his sister (25, still lives at home. She's bipolar and has a 6yo son her parents are raising). We'd recently had it out (SIL and I--she may be bipolar but completely medicated she's still a jerk), so I wasn't really excited for her to be the first one to find out. When DH told her, "Tell Mom and Dad they're gonna be grandparents again." she responded with, "What, I'm not pregnant." I was so furious I walked out of the room. She went on to complain that we "just" had DS (18m). Their mom called later and said we "misunderstood" what she was saying. Sure, make ANOTHER excuse for your lazy, whacked-out, hateful, rude, insanely jealous daughter...

Sorry, guess those pregnancy hormones are already attacking. Anyway, I don't know anyone who doesn't know now!

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#21 of 61 Old 09-05-2010, 07:47 AM
 
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Becca, I'm sorry you had to deal w/ that situation. What a spiteful, rude person your SIL sounds like.

Mama to two lovely boys and a new baby due mid-May 2011
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#22 of 61 Old 09-05-2010, 08:25 AM
 
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We're telling our families between today and tomorrow. I'm going to get little apple cut-outs and help my son make a family tree. Using an apple that states "coming May '11" for the new little bean. I'm really excited, but nervous to tell them.

Wife to Josh ~ mommy to frankie (10-24-06) and hayley (7-25-09) and Caleb (4-30-11)
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#23 of 61 Old 09-05-2010, 12:42 PM
 
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We told our kids the day we found out, and that's all it took! They tell everyone! Our neighbors came over with some cookies and congratulations! The boys drew a picture of our family including the "baby in the belly" to show to Grandma. Now that Grandma knows, even the distant relatives will know soon. I've been itching to tell Facebook, but haven't yet.

Mom to 5 amazing kids! (DS8, DS7, DD4, DD2 and DS0)

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#24 of 61 Old 09-05-2010, 09:31 PM
 
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We won't be telling anyone until around 12 weeks. My brother and SIL might find out sooner because they are coming to visit next month.
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#25 of 61 Old 09-06-2010, 12:46 PM
 
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This is our first, I'm 4 weeks 2 days at the moment, and we're planning to wait until Canadian Thanksgiving (Oct 11) when I'll be 10 weeks, to tell our family & friends. If I start showing sooner I guess I might have to cave and tell them sooner, but I don't want the pity if it doesn't stick.
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#26 of 61 Old 09-06-2010, 05:02 PM
 
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I just realized that not wanting other people to know my business is *not* the only reason I haven't wanted to tell people! I was just sitting and thinking about when I want to tell the kids. I started to think on why I don't want to tell them now to begin with. I know that the kids would tell friends of ours, but so far the people that we chill w/ know already - its the homeschool groups, facebook, my husband's friends, my extended family, etc.. those are the folks I don't want to tell. I realized that it's not only that I don't like ppl gossiping about me, etc.. but on some level I feel like I will jinx it or something! I almost feel as if the pregnancy isn't real. Like if I were to tell the kids, I'd miscarry or something. Which is so silly, considering that I feel very confident this time - each time I miscarried I knew it would happen on some level and waited for it. This time around I have a gnosis the other way around.. I'm not worried about m/c so much as my nutrition, and avoiding heavy lifting, cleaners and cat litter.

I feel like a head case! Someone help talk me out of this. lol. My kids are almost 9 and almost 7.. I know they could actually be helpful to me if I let them in on the secret.

~Sadie fly-by-nursing1.gifintactlact.gif  guitar.gif sewmachine.gif - mom to dd 9/15/01, ds 11/12/03 {ubac}, and ds 4/29/2011, wife to Mitchell.  pos.gif coming soon in late June!
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#27 of 61 Old 09-06-2010, 09:23 PM
 
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kitty waltz - you're not a head case! We were planning on telling immediate family only for now (I'm 6w1d), but the word is now completely out. I must admit I'm feeling a little ambivalent about so many people knowing already. It's a weird combo of not wanting people to talk about it/me and a bit of worry, too. I don't remember feeling this complicated with my first two (I have an 8 and 6 year old). My kids are being awfully sweet about it, which is a plus for telling them...

 DD1 (8yrs) + DD2 (6yrs) + DS1 (4/25/11) = one crazy adventure!
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#28 of 61 Old 09-06-2010, 09:52 PM
 
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Sadie, I'm totally with you about not wanted to jinx it. I feel that way all the time. If they are 9 and 7 though, they are probably already aware that something is up - my 9 year old just made a crack the other day about my eating "so much" lately.

Just remember what Jr'smom said about them telling everyone - I told my kids, and the 9 yo proceeded to tell her best friend at that friend's birthday party - who then proceeded to tell THE WHOLE ASSEMBLY at the top of her lungs, including my best friend (her mother) who I was going to pull aside and tell quietly myself. I hadn't had time to mention to my little darling to keep it under wraps.

Melissa Andrew dd1 dd2 dd3 and
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#29 of 61 Old 09-06-2010, 10:04 PM
 
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kitty waltz - you're not a head case! We were planning on telling immediate family only for now (I'm 6w1d), but the word is now completely out. I must admit I'm feeling a little ambivalent about so many people knowing already. It's a weird combo of not wanting people to talk about it/me and a bit of worry, too. I don't remember feeling this complicated with my first two (I have an 8 and 6 year old). My kids are being awfully sweet about it, which is a plus for telling them...
Our kids are the same age! I didn't feel quite so complicated in previous pregnancies either.

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Originally Posted by LadyElmo
Sadie, I'm totally with you about not wanted to jinx it. I feel that way all the time. If they are 9 and 7 though, they are probably already aware that something is up - my 9 year old just made a crack the other day about my eating "so much" lately.

Just remember what Jr'smom said about them telling everyone - I told my kids, and the 9 yo proceeded to tell her best friend at that friend's birthday party - who then proceeded to tell THE WHOLE ASSEMBLY at the top of her lungs, including my best friend (her mother) who I was going to pull aside and tell quietly myself. I hadn't had time to mention to my little darling to keep it under wraps.
They are *totally* aware something is up. They've so far explained the fact that I've quit smoking and am now eating a whole lot by "mommy's just trying to get healthier." I never lie to them,but I figured that's half of the truth and agreed with their assumption. But now they are asking me why I'm having tea in the mornings instead of coffee, and why do I feel like I'm going to throw up all the time? That's what got me thinking in the first place.. they seem to already know something is up, so what's holding me back, ya know?

And that totally sounds like something my daughter would do!!

~Sadie fly-by-nursing1.gifintactlact.gif  guitar.gif sewmachine.gif - mom to dd 9/15/01, ds 11/12/03 {ubac}, and ds 4/29/2011, wife to Mitchell.  pos.gif coming soon in late June!
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#30 of 61 Old 09-06-2010, 10:06 PM
 
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And thanks for the reassurance, Almamiel and Melissa, I needed it!

~Sadie fly-by-nursing1.gifintactlact.gif  guitar.gif sewmachine.gif - mom to dd 9/15/01, ds 11/12/03 {ubac}, and ds 4/29/2011, wife to Mitchell.  pos.gif coming soon in late June!
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