Weekly Chat Thread Oct 18-24 - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#61 of 90 Old 10-20-2010, 02:35 PM
 
MamaChef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 675
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
bluepetals,
Im glad you had a better experience. Did your OB/FP Dr. know you were planning a homebirth? Im just not a good liar so the end of my pregnancy would have been miserable for me. I couldnt even figure out the logistics of that. Did I just call my Doc after the HB and say, well.. baby came at home.. oh, and by the way, I dont plan on doing any post partum visits..thanks for the memories. Did you have to do Shadowcare even though you had a vaginal delivery with your first?


samstress,


When it rains, it pours, huh?

That sounds like alot of stuff to process at once.

It sucks that midwives in your area are so expensive. Around here they are anywhere from 2800-3800. If you did shadow care and just transferred to the midwife at 36 weeks for the final prenatals and the birth that is even cheaper. I dont know if that is an option where you are. Im so sorry that you cant have midwifery care during your pregnancy. All insurance should cover midwives. Are you in an illegal HB state?

I hope the school can work something out for your DD's tuition.



Evergreen, it felt like a police state. I know Im oversensitive about these things but I havent really even went to more then a handful of doctor's visits in a very very long time. And my doctor's experiences before that were with a series of pharmacuetical drug pushers who booked in into a 10 minute time slot and had no real ability to evaluate the complexities that were me I gave up on all that and decided it was kind of up to me to figure out how to heal thyself. Since then, I just havent had ailments that Doctors could help me more with then changes to my diet, exercise, therapy modalities, and herbs could. So, the weirdness of the OB care when Im used to not just my own experience with pregnancy, but 9 years of sitting with clients or as a student is just heartbreaking. A woman came into the office obviously in transition. They made her wait in the waiting room with sick people (it's one of those big multicare places) for 30 minutes! I just wanted to cry for her. She was in the room next to me where they made her wait for another 20 minutes...and they checked her and then freaked out because she was 8cm.

Well, duh. I coulda told you she was atleast 7 by looking at her an hour ago! That woman woulda had her baby hours ago if she was being attended by a homebirth midwife.

It's such a growing, changing time of life.. It breaks my heart that so many women get shuffled through the fear factory and told what their bodies will be allowed to do. "Ill *let* you to go to 42 weeks". And this is a good response! Women seeking VBACs cry tears of joy to have a doc that will give them 2 extra weeks to gestate in peace.

Anyway, Im so thankful to live somewhere that has so many options for me. So so so thankful.



Jrsmom,
It sounds like your Dr. is willing to think about it.. is he attached to any conglomerate healthcare system? I hate that healthcare systems get to make so many decisions for the doctors. As if dealing with the disparity in power between and OB and a laboring/pregnant woman werent enough, now we have multibillion dollar industries controlling policies from a boardroom.

I read your post about your anxiety around the births. It sounds like you have done everything you possibly could to birth your babies vaginally at home. You are a chiropracter. You know bones. Maybe doing the Pink Kit exercises for pelvic mapping will help you have even more peace with knowing if you do have actual CPD or if there are places in your pelvis you could create more room to help the baby engage.

I hope you get an empowered birth you feel good about.


nixnc,
I think a friendly environment is so important with a care provider. Im so glad you found a group of people who like what they do.
MamaChef is offline  
#62 of 90 Old 10-20-2010, 03:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
Evergreen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Where all the women are strong
Posts: 5,400
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaChef View Post



A woman came into the office obviously in transition. They made her wait in the waiting room with sick people (it's one of those big multicare places) for 30 minutes! I just wanted to cry for her. She was in the room next to me where they made her wait for another 20 minutes...and they checked her and then freaked out because she was 8cm.

Well, duh. I coulda told you she was atleast 7 by looking at her an hour ago! That woman woulda had her baby hours ago if she was being attended by a homebirth midwife.

Holy Crap! I wonder why she didn't go tot the hospital?!?!?!

samstress . that is so stressful. I am so sorry. This economy sucks. Dh is meeting with a recruiter today and going back into the Army at the age of 38 because he can't find a job in his field. I wish things could just be happy.

Evergreen- Loving my girls Dylan dust.gifage8, Ava energy.gifage 4 and baby Georgia baby.gif (6/3/11).

Evergreen is offline  
#63 of 90 Old 10-20-2010, 03:30 PM
 
NicMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 279
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
MamaChef - So glad you have found a better situation now. I would HATE having to go to two sets of doctors. Your midwife would end up having to sort things out and calm you down from all the stress the doctor gave you and who needs that during pregnancy.

Samstress - Oh dear! Those prices do seem a bit high. The prices for HB are not even that high in San Francisco. Maybe you can shop around or ask for a discount

My family = Me + DH plus new babe 5/12 make 3 buddamomimg1.png

NicMom is offline  
#64 of 90 Old 10-20-2010, 03:47 PM
 
clutterbug's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,046
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaChef View Post
bluepetals,
Im glad you had a better experience. Did your OB/FP Dr. know you were planning a homebirth? Im just not a good liar so the end of my pregnancy would have been miserable for me. I couldnt even figure out the logistics of that. Did I just call my Doc after the HB and say, well.. baby came at home.. oh, and by the way, I dont plan on doing any post partum visits..thanks for the memories. Did you have to do Shadowcare even though you had a vaginal delivery with your first?
With my previous pregnancy, midwifery in my province was alegal - as in, not illegal, but not regulated, either. I paid out of pocket for midwifery services, but since they had no standing to order labs etc and no hospital privileges, the typical setup was that you also saw a doctor for shared care (I went every month to see my midwife, and every two months to the doctor). That way, I could have blood work etc (paid for under the provincial system - I'm Canadian), and if for whatever reason I had to go to hospital for the birth, I wouldn't be showing up to just whoever was on call...the doc I was seeing would come and attend the birth, with the midwife there with me for support. I specifically asked to be referred to a family doctor who had worked with the midwives lots of times before, so she was very aware that I was planning a homebirth and was supportive of it (I have had great luck with family docs...my first birth was in hospital with family doc and she was pretty great, too). All in all, a pretty sweet setup! I think she did want to see me after baby arrived at home, but I went to see my own family doctor instead (I figured my doc would want to see me, too, and didn't relish two different trips into town!). I did send her a photo birth announcement with a big thank you for her support for homebirth

This time around, midwifery is regulated and paid for under the health care system. No double appointments required (assuming all goes perfectly - always the chance I would need a consult or whatever). Now I just have to get in with them for care....still waiting to hear back and kinda getting nervous!
clutterbug is offline  
#65 of 90 Old 10-20-2010, 04:40 PM
 
becca_howell's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Jacksonville, FL
Posts: 638
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryleeee View Post
so we're going to hang out and play plants vs. zombies and do nothing instead. weee!
oh boy pvz rocks! I LOVE that game! I don't know how many hours wasted on that game! Did you know they have an iPod app? LOL

DH: It's after midnight, what are you doing up?
Me: I can't sleep, so I'm killing some zombies.

Me: femalesling.GIFDH: fuzmalesling.gifDD: hearts.gifDS1: superhero.gifDS2: babyboy.gif
lactivist.gifsaynovax.gifsigncirc1.gifwinner.jpgcd.gifsewmachine.gifribboncesarean.gifribboncesarean.gifvbac.giffamilybed2.gif

becca_howell is offline  
#66 of 90 Old 10-20-2010, 05:44 PM
 
MrsBone's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Oak Point, TX
Posts: 1,184
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well, this week has been a little worse than last week. I still feel alot better but have thrown up twice..mostly from eating either the wrong food or too much. I swear, this baby hates anything too junky, too sugary, or just too much. Not feeling nauseous any other time though really, just when I eat too much or if I induldge in something not so great for me. Still overall feeling much better. I'm planning a playdate for saturday with the families from my first birthing class that I attended. We were all having mostly our first babies at the same time and really bonded in that short 6 week birthing from within class. Two years later, we've stayed in touch and have had regular playdates. We're all going to the pumpkin patch and have lunch. I can't wait!

DH(9/04) DS(12/08) and DD(5/11)

MrsBone is offline  
#67 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 01:48 AM
 
elonwy's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Alameda, CA
Posts: 677
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
We went to our first prenatal visit today I am so happy with the midwife and the student midwife that will be attending the birth. We also meet with the exact same people every single time we have a prenatal visit as who will be at the birth, which is just awesome in my opinion. We had to have the horrid genetics testing talk, as CA requires it, and they have also changed the laws so if you choose to have one genetic test you HAVE TO have them all, which I think is just stupid, but whatever, we're not doing it anyway.
It was too early for her to try to find a heartbeat with the doppler, she wouldn't even try, but it was an awesome visit. I've gained 6lbs in the last two months, which is not that bad of a baby weight gain. I seriously think at least 2 of that is just boobs.
Anyway it was awesome!! YAY!!!
I also think (knock on wood) that I'm starting to feel better.

 treehugger.giftrekkie.gif married to Mikestillheart.gif Mama to my furry babies cat.gifjust gave birth to our first babyf.gif DS.

 

 

elonwy is offline  
#68 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 02:21 AM
 
ryleeee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: royston vasey
Posts: 2,638
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by becca_howell View Post
oh boy pvz rocks! I LOVE that game! I don't know how many hours wasted on that game! Did you know they have an iPod app? LOL

DH: It's after midnight, what are you doing up?
Me: I can't sleep, so I'm killing some zombies.


yes...i spend WAY too much time playing this game. haye loves it!

photosmile2.gif mom to 5 year old haye REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif(9.27.2005) and brand new baby zaobabyf.gif(5.23.2011)
ryleeee is offline  
#69 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 09:12 AM
 
annaconda's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Up North
Posts: 544
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Morning mamas!
11 days left in first tri and since I didn't really have ms I'm feeling more preg than ever. My head is swimming with hormones and last night I was all agitated and antsy and let out this primal yell when we didn't have spicy mustard in the house. it knocked one of my kitties off the chair. The good news was that spicy sausage with sauteed green and orange peppers and onions on whole wheat rolls ROCKED. we did have Dijon mustard at least.

In the am my head is just throbby with progesterone.

Long day today... health fair for 6 hrs.

Dh and I have gotten over a hump he was not wanting to touch my belly earlier this week. And that set me off but we've talked it through and are doing better than ever.
Hugs all around.

Anna, married to my soulmate and expecting #1 in May 2011.... 3 kitties
annaconda is offline  
#70 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 01:53 PM
 
MamaChef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 675
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
bluepetals,
That sounds a little better then what it means typically here, which is you go to an OB, never mentioning that you are thinking of having a homebirth, doing all the appts twice. So at the end you'd be going to both of them weekly. It feels super sneaky and just not how I wanted to feel about my care.

Im so glad for you that it will be more simple this time. How much longer do you think it will be before you hear back about if they take you or not? That would drive me mad.

MrsBone,

That's so great that you stayed in touch. I used to do group child birth classes and loved the reunions. I hope you have a fun playdate!

elonwy,

Continuity of care is so awesome. I love that there is actual relationship that develops through all the visits. It's so much more comfortable to birth with people you trust.

So glad you had a great visit!

annaconda,
Arent hormones fun? LOL. We had spicy seitan sausage "Seattle" style (cream cheese, bubbies kraut, carmelized onions, brown mustard) and they were sooo good. Ive been craving seitan phillies.


We went to the zoo yesterday and ate yummy vegetarian thai food for lunch. It felt good to get out and get some exercise. DD loves the zoo and it was nice getting to spend the day with her and hubby. I definitely feel alot better then I have been. Hoping it just keeps on continuing.
MamaChef is offline  
#71 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 02:20 PM
 
annaconda's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Up North
Posts: 544
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Zomg that sounds DIVINE. Anything with cream cheese. Ok... having that next week.
Also beg Thai food and zoo walking - Fun!

Anna, married to my soulmate and expecting #1 in May 2011.... 3 kitties
annaconda is offline  
#72 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 02:53 PM
 
clutterbug's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,046
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
It's so nice to hear about people starting feel better. I hope everyone can say that soon!

MamaChef, your guess is as good as mine about when I'll hear back, I think I have followed up a few times, the office administrator says that every time they sit down to go through the stack of files, a birth comes up and they get called away. I thought I was going to hear by last Friday/Monday, but still nothing.
clutterbug is offline  
#73 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 11:04 PM
 
nixnc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: wilmington nc
Posts: 94
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i'm a little disappointed because my husband doesn't understand why i want t see a midwife and he is scared of what is going to happen in case of an emergency. he feels he doesn't have a say so because it is my body and he also feels the reason i want to go with a midwife is solely because they are more personable than docs. he feels docs have more training and know more about how the body works than someone that hasn't had the "formal education."

i tried to explain that a midwife is more about allowing a woman to give birth the way nature intended and being more in tune to a female's state of mind about what feels right with our bodies. he says it is all about "feelings."

while i want him to be more comfortable with a midwife, i don't want him to be a nervous wreck this entire pregnancy over it because that will just cause me more stress.

i told him to write down his questions and concerns for our appt on monday. i also assured him that the midwife practice i am attending is part of a physician's group affiliated with the University of Chapel Hill, so there are docs in the practice for any emergency imaginable.

anyone have any advice?
nixnc is offline  
#74 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 11:18 PM
 
ryleeee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: royston vasey
Posts: 2,638
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
nixnc, do you have netflix?? if you do, watch the business of being born. if you don't, find it and get your husband to watch it with you!!!!! seriously. i bet it would ease a lot of his fears.

photosmile2.gif mom to 5 year old haye REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif(9.27.2005) and brand new baby zaobabyf.gif(5.23.2011)
ryleeee is offline  
#75 of 90 Old 10-21-2010, 11:47 PM
 
nixnc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: wilmington nc
Posts: 94
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i do have netflix. i will do that. thanks!
nixnc is offline  
#76 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 12:16 AM
 
MamaChef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 675
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
nixnc, Are you talking about a seeing a Certified Professional Midwife (homebirth, or birth center births usually) or a Nurse Midwife who works in a group with OBs and delivers in hospital?

bluepetals, Crossing all my fingers and toes for you that you get a call back soon.
MamaChef is offline  
#77 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 10:27 AM
 
camprunner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,610
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
NixNC, which midwife are you using. I have always used midwives out of Wilmington. One for a hospital birth and two for homebirth (including this one). A lot of midwives are trained a lot better for normal childbirth than doctors. In NC, all CNM's must be supervised by a doctor whom they consult about any complications that might arise. It's really the best of both worlds because you are getting the personal attention and support of a midwife (who is very knowledgable herself) and the education and knowledge of an actual doctor.
camprunner is offline  
#78 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 10:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
Evergreen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Where all the women are strong
Posts: 5,400
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
nixnc- I think once he meets the midwife he'll be fine. Plus in those big practices you often get whomever is on call unless you specifically request a midwife so even if you were an OB patient you'd still see a midwife for an occasional appt. and perhaps birth.

Farrrrrrk! I am still sooooo sick. I am miserable.

Evergreen- Loving my girls Dylan dust.gifage8, Ava energy.gifage 4 and baby Georgia baby.gif (6/3/11).

Evergreen is offline  
#79 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 11:27 AM
 
nixnc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: wilmington nc
Posts: 94
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
camprunner--i am using university physicians.

the midwife is part of a physicians group and i will be delivering at the hospital.

thanks for the info guys.
nixnc is offline  
#80 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 02:13 PM
 
camprunner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,610
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by nixnc View Post
camprunner--i am using university physicians.

the midwife is part of a physicians group and i will be delivering at the hospital.

thanks for the info guys.
I saw McBride for my first one. I looked it up and it looks like she works for the same practice. If you are used to working with an OB, I think you will really like her. I'm not familiar with Carney though. If you change your mind and decide to home birth, do NOT tell them. McBride has been known to drop patients for even suspecting.
camprunner is offline  
#81 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 04:12 PM
 
ryleeee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: royston vasey
Posts: 2,638
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i hope the movie helps! there are quite a few births that might make him squeamish but the more you see the better, i think...especially if you are already a bit squicked out by birth. i haven't finished the show yet, i think i have 20 minutes left, but i have cried FIVE TIMES already or something ridiculous like that! haha. derek promised me he'd watch it so i might just wait and re-watch it with him

photosmile2.gif mom to 5 year old haye REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif(9.27.2005) and brand new baby zaobabyf.gif(5.23.2011)
ryleeee is offline  
#82 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 09:04 PM
 
jr'smom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Illinois
Posts: 1,716
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm not looking forward to the weekend. I have a conference all day Saturday and until 1pm on Sunday. Then we're babysitting my niece and nephew Sunday afternoon. I just need some rest! We're finishing our basement right now, so even when I'm home it's not really restful. I work during the week and next weekend is a birthday party and Halloween. We're having my sister over on Halloween so she can trick-or-treat with the kids (I'll go too.) Then the following week we have to go to Las Vegas on Wednesday through Sunday. I'm just lookiing for a break in here somewhere! Yikes! At least this business should make the pregnancy go faster. I can't wait for this baby and 3 months off!

Mom to 5 amazing kids! (DS8, DS7, DD4, DD2 and DS0)

jr'smom is offline  
#83 of 90 Old 10-22-2010, 10:22 PM
 
Almamiel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: southeastern nowhere
Posts: 973
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Been doing a terrible job with posting - between work and kids, can't keep up! Almost 13 weeks (on Sunday) and feeling waaaay better this week - thank goodness!

jr'smom - that sucks about your conference - I have to travel for work on Tues and Weds and not looking forward to it. 6 hour drive each way and will be with the CEO and a SVP - although they're both pretty entertaining guys, so it will be bearable.

 DD1 (8yrs) + DD2 (6yrs) + DS1 (4/25/11) = one crazy adventure!
Almamiel is offline  
#84 of 90 Old 10-23-2010, 02:00 AM
 
ryleeee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: royston vasey
Posts: 2,638
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
man...i swear i look about 4 months pregnant and i'm just over 2...it's insane!

photosmile2.gif mom to 5 year old haye REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif(9.27.2005) and brand new baby zaobabyf.gif(5.23.2011)
ryleeee is offline  
#85 of 90 Old 10-23-2010, 11:54 AM
 
sewingsparklz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 285
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryleeee View Post
man...i swear i look about 4 months pregnant and i'm just over 2...it's insane!
I know! Me too! This is a 5 to 6 month belly compared to my first pregnancy, and I'm only 12 weeks!
sewingsparklz is offline  
#86 of 90 Old 10-24-2010, 02:03 AM
 
samstress's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: so-cal
Posts: 2,240
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
elonwy - so glad you had an "awesome" first prenatal visit and that you are starting to feel better. wonderful news.

MamaChef - glad you're feeling better and enjoyed a lovely day at the zoo. dh, dd and i went to the aquarium last weekend and we had such a great time. dd has been insisting for a while that we ride the train, so we took it there. what would have taken 45 minutes by car took 2 1/2 on the train and subway, but it was totally worth it. dd was completely enthralled the entire time. so fun! love to see how excited she gets about such simple things.

MrsBone - how wonderful that you're still in touch with the families from your first birthing class (two year later). the playdate sounds like fun.

nixnc - when i was pregnant last year i had a hard time convincing my dh of my desire to have a midwife attend the birth (it ended up being moot -- we lost the baby), but i think it had more to do with the fact that dd was born via emergency c-section (which was even scarier for him than for me -- while pushing, dd's heart rate disappeared, i was whisked away and dh had no idea what was happening to me or baby for about 20 minutes).

in his mind there was a possibility that the next could end that way as well, so he very much wanted to be in a hospital.

we watched the business of being born (as a pp mentioned) and that helped a lot. we also went to a lecture on vbac facts which also helped. he got to ask lots of questions and get all the stats (from someone other than me).

sorry, i don't really have any advice, just wanted to commiserate. hope he's on board after your appointment.

ryleeee and sewingsparklz - nice to know it's not just me. on certain days i look at least 5 months.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaChef View Post
samstress,


When it rains, it pours, huh?

That sounds like alot of stuff to process at once.

It sucks that midwives in your area are so expensive. Around here they are anywhere from 2800-3800. If you did shadow care and just transferred to the midwife at 36 weeks for the final prenatals and the birth that is even cheaper. I dont know if that is an option where you are. Im so sorry that you cant have midwifery care during your pregnancy. All insurance should cover midwives. Are you in an illegal HB state?

I hope the school can work something out for your DD's tuition.

it certainly does. and today we wake up with major plumbing issues. i had been keeping it together pretty well, but today i just lost it and i can't stop crying. everything is making me cry. don't know if it's the pregnancy hormones or just the stress (or both). i'm trying to keep it together and remain positive and calm for the baby (and for the rest of my family), but i'm having a really hard time today.

on top of it, i haven't really been having any pregnancy symptoms, which makes me nervous. i keep telling myself the nausea is just subsiding because i've nearly reached the second trimester, but i can't help but be a bit scared. a couple nights ago i was lying in bed with dd and i thought i felt the baby move (is it too early for that? with dd i didn't feel anything until about 17 weeks). i got very excited. so did dd. she wanted to feel too (so sweet ). anyway, i haven't felt anything since. which also makes me nervous. ugh! i think if we hadn't had a previous loss i wouldn't be feeling this way.

anyway, hadn't thought of transferring to a midwife later in my pregnancy and honestly don't know if that is an option. i am not in an illegal HB state. yes, all insurance should cover midwives. i hate that i have insurance, but can't get the birth i want.

dd's school assured me that they very much consider her a part of the school's community (she's been there since she was one) and want her to stay. they've said i can volunteer some hours at the school so she can stay tuition-free. i was relieved to not have to yank her out school, but others i've talked to feel that they're taking advantage of me (knowing that it would break my heart to pull her out). i don't know.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evergreen View Post
samstress . that is so stressful. I am so sorry. This economy sucks. Dh is meeting with a recruiter today and going back into the Army at the age of 38 because he can't find a job in his field. I wish things could just be happy.
how awful. i hate that so many people are in the same boat. so many hard working families that just are struggling to get by. dh and i both work for small companies/organizations. we don't make much money and we have no retirement, but we love what we do and are happy and we always thought that mattered more than anything. honestly, i'm starting to think it's time i completely shake things up or do something completely different in a field that would offer me more stability. something i didn't really think i'd be doing at 38. i don't know. i feel like i've got way too much on my plate right now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NicMom View Post
Samstress - Oh dear! Those prices do seem a bit high. The prices for HB are not even that high in San Francisco. Maybe you can shop around or ask for a discount
the prices i've seen seem pretty comparable. i actually thought about telling her my sob story and asking for a discount, but i'm a little embarrassed. and would she? i mean, she has to make a living too, right?

i've heard about a local midwife who might give a break to struggling families, perhaps i'll look into it. at the very least, i've said i will have a doula at the birth. i'm trying to get excited about that.

sorry for the general downer of a post. just a rough day. i honestly feel so fortunate for so many things and realize lots of people have it worse than we do. i'm fortunate to even be in this ddc (i realize this every time i see one of our members say goodbye). so glad i'm here and that i can get all my stuff out of my head and down in print. thanks so much.

mother is a verb
I GOT MY vbac.gif!!!

samstress is offline  
#87 of 90 Old 10-24-2010, 02:28 AM
 
ryleeee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: royston vasey
Posts: 2,638
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
man sam. i've had a rough week too. sounds like we could both use a hug!

ugh. i should be sleeping. we got zero sleep last night...haye was up alllllll night coughing. derek got home from work at 3:30 and relieved me. well, he tried to but i was hungry and nauseous so i had a snack and watched an episode of golgo 13 with him. i think i fell asleep around 4:30. haye woke me up around 8 and was coughing like crazy...a seal bark.
frig.
i knew he was developing croup (he had it a few months ago) so i took him to the walk-in where they were going back and forth on croup and whooping cough...finally gave me antibiotics for the whooping cough and steroids in puffer form for the croup. i didn't argue because i have had whooping cough before and it is HORRIBLE. i was 16, had been vaccinated for it and i honestly thought i was dying. it was the scariest time of my life. 2) if they swabbed him to test for it it would take 2 weeks for the test results to show up. that's not very helpful, is it?

i think he has croup. the puffer seems to have relieved him enough to sleep even though it technically shouldn't work for a few days. the antibiotics are only for 5 days as a precaution and he can't be around any kids...so church and king's kids and school is out.

oh and derek's EI was officially cut off today. they told us to appeal it but that could take a long time...it was cut off 6 weeks ago out of the blue. long story and i have a headache. *sigh*

i have lots to be thankful for and shouldn't whine so much. we have a great support group that is holding us up in prayer and i know in my heart it will all turn out alright. it just has been a really long week. i haven't thrown up in like 4 days though! weeee!

hope you guys are all doing well.

photosmile2.gif mom to 5 year old haye REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif(9.27.2005) and brand new baby zaobabyf.gif(5.23.2011)
ryleeee is offline  
#88 of 90 Old 10-24-2010, 09:41 AM
 
camprunner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,610
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I hope things start going better for everyone soon. I am 10 weeks 1 day and the stomach issues seem to be gone so long as I am eating pickles every day. Yesterday I bought a bebe band which was nice when I tried it on and a pair of Yoga pants that I swear I'm never taking off! I do have some painful heavy stretching feelings in my uterus area but hopefully once my body is used to this they will be much easier.
camprunner is offline  
#89 of 90 Old 10-24-2010, 09:56 AM
 
clutterbug's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,046
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
samstress - I am almost 13 weeks and have been feeling suspected movement for a couple of weeks - but it is REALLY inconsistent. I will feel it and then a couple of days might go by and nothing more. I am still sort of wondering if it's gas - but it really doesn't feel like it, and it's always in the same place, just a little above my pubic bone, so I am sticking with the baby theory I figure it's not really much of a tight squeeze in there right now, baby has room to move around...and baby only weighs like an ounce, so probably has to be in just the right position for movement to really be felt.

Hugs to everyone who is struggling with such stressful stuff
clutterbug is offline  
#90 of 90 Old 10-24-2010, 08:00 PM
 
L&K'smommie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: AK
Posts: 727
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Samstress- Hugs! As to your MW I would ask if they have a discounted rate...my MW discounts if you are self pay and pay in full by 32 weeks...a 20% discount(which is $740). And some MW's are open for trades too. It definitely doesn't hurt to ask.

S, mama to L(DD)-12/04, K(DS1)-12/06, C(DS2)-03/09 & B(DS3)-05/11

L&K'smommie is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off